This is what happens when you let drummers write lyrics.

[tyrannosaurus vex]

So... I wrote this song for my band (download/listen for full effect). I'm at a loss for lyrics, though (I suck at that part). I decided to take suggestions. My drummer said he'd come up with something, so I'm like "Yeah, sure dude whatever. Make it a love song or something like that."

Background on my drummer: he's a Vietnam veteran; he's had his shoulder replaced, and he spent the last 18 months battling some kind of hepatitis. He's also a biker, and he has no qualms about discussing his bowel functions.

Anyway, today he presents me with the lyrics. And, I quote:

Woman with a 4' clit

There's a mist hanging over the ocean
There's a mist hanging under a tree
There's a gal that I know in the valley
With a clit hanging down to her knee



Chorus- Pour me an ocean of whiskey
              I'll swim there lord till I drowned
              Just show me a chick with a 4 ft clit
              And I'll follow her trail on the ground


She broke the high jumpin record
I've never seen one jump any higher
It happened when we was out camping
And she stood too close to the fire

Chorus


Well she's dead but not forgotten
The pain it cuts like a sword
It happened when we went sky diving
And she reached up and pulled the wrong cord

Chorus twice

[Lies]

So... I wrote this song for my band (download/listen for full effect). I'm at a loss for lyrics, though (I suck at that part). I decided to take suggestions. My drummer said he'd come up with something, so I'm like "Yeah, sure dude whatever. Make it a love song or something like that."

Background on my drummer: he's a Vietnam veteran; he's had his shoulder replaced, and he spent the last 18 months battling some kind of hepatitis. He's also a biker, and he has no qualms about discussing his bowel functions.

Anyway, today he presents me with the lyrics. And, I quote:

Woman with a 4' clit

There's a mist hanging over the ocean
There's a mist hanging under a tree
There's a gal that I know in the valley
With a clit hanging down to her knee



Chorus- Pour me an ocean of whiskey
             I'll swim there lord till I drowned
             Just show me a chick with a 4 ft clit
             And I'll follow her trail on the ground


She broke the high jumpin record
I've never seen one jump any higher
It happened when we was out camping
And she stood too close to the fire

Chorus


Well she's dead but not forgotten
The pain it cuts like a sword
It happened when we went sky diving
And she reached up and pulled the wrong cord

Chorus twice

I smell a one hit wonder here.

[ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞]

[Nephew Twiddleton]

You should keep the song as is.

[tyrannosaurus vex]

I think I will. it is hilarious.

[Stelpa]

 

0_0

Your friend is bi-curiously living through the subject of the song. He has always regretted being circumcised as a child. Rename the song "Foreskin Blues" and you have an instant hit. Fucking hippies.

[Jasper]

DON'T CHANGE IT

THAT IS AMAZING

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Amazing song! Keep every word as-is.

[Mangrove]

Step 1 - Leave song as it is.
Step 2 - Defuse inevitable criticism with either:

a) It's satire.
b) It's actually a symbolic ode to the 'divine feminine'.
c) It's a reaction to phallo-centric rock music (cf: Led Zeppelin's "Whole Lotta Love")
d) Strange mixture of a, b & c.


Mang' - should've been a pretentious music journalist.*




*As opposed to just being pretentious.