Any special offers? *growls*

[BadBeast]

I must be the luckiest person in the fucking world! This must be the 100th
time this week I've gone to a website, only to be congratulated on being the 999,999th fucking visitor to this site! Not only that, but I have also been nominated! notimated, no less, to be the possible winner of a fucking IPod / IPad / IMac / /IPhone! Or my IP Address has been selected to be the lucky recipient of a brand new Mini, or some other bullshit "offer". Not only that, but my fucking Postman keeps shovelling reams of junkmail through my letterbox while I'm asleep, personally addressed to me, offering me Garden Furniture, (1st floor flat) or Gas Boiler insurance (no fucking gas) or pension schemes, or some other totally useless shit, like solar panels, double glazing, or timeshare narrowboat hollidays in East Fucking Anglia!
The marketing cunts behing it must have stolen my name from somewhere,  not even bothered to do any demographics before cutting down another forestload of timber to mail to me, personally, with their "Special Offers", because if they did, they certainly wouldn't be offering me Motability Scooters, Elegant "Persian Style" Carpets, or Luxury Leather Furniture, that wouldn't even FIT through my fucking door! I've got three Power supply Companies squabbling over who gets to rip me off for Electricity, even a Gas supplier wanting to sell me fucking electric! I've got a stack of TV Licence "reminders" demanding money with menaces, (Those cunts have never had a penny out of me, and never will!) and now the Local Authority Balliffs are quietly slipping letters through my door, saying "We called, but you were out" (fucking lying bastards! I stood and watched them tiptoeing up the hallway!) threatening to "Levy Distress" on me for not paying my fucking Poll Tax! I'll Levy fucking distress on his fucking sneaky parasitic arse next time I see him! Especially as the Letter informs me that every time he sneaks one  through the door, it costs me another £60! Fuck that. They can charge another £600 for all I care, I still won't pay the fucker. My Slumlord Housing association are sending "Customer Satisfaction Surveys" out like there's no tomorrow, seeking my opinion on the level of service they provide! ("Because what matters to you, matters to us") Pisstaking bastards! I might just tell them my opinion. Again.! GRRRRRR!RANT!   RAGE! BIBBLE   GIBBER! FROTH TWITCH!

Right, glad I got that out of my system! Sorry to have taken up your valuable time with my rabid tantrum. Have to go now, and staple another kitten to the Hallway ceiling, before next door's ugly numbnut kids come back from school. Give them something to screech about for a change! GRRR!  

[slothrop23]

save the kittens.

nail the kids to the baliffs

[frogsicle]

FREE!!!
LONG NAILS - perfect for anchoring kittens or even small children
just ***click here***!!!!

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bleah...

[BadBeast]

Add block plus.

I've not seen a 9999th visitor thing or similar vibrating eye gouging pack of lies for years. That should help you with annoying online adverts. As for postal spam, you could try the do not mail list, and the no call list for the phone, but they take a few months to kick in properly, and to be honest, the do not mail list, seemed to fail miserably.

The do not call list, and the add block however, work just great. Good luck dodging the TV licensing people. I hate those bastards.

Well, here's proof that it really does pay to totally ignore the letters, and when they knock, if you do open the door, don't let the fuckers in. (They've got no right of entry) This morning, I looked in the pile of useless shit that comes through my door, to pick my giro up.  And there was another letter from the TV People. Now, bearing in mind I've been in this flat 15 years, and never had a TV Licence.
I've had over a hundred of their letters, and about a dozen visits. They hate me. So I opened their letter this morning, and it said,

"Dear Sir / Madam, (They've never even got hold of my name, because I'm not on the Electoral Roll) Thank you for letting us know that you don't need a TV Licence. (???) You won'r recieve anymore letters from us for almost two years.We'll then get in touch to see if your circumstances have changed.
As many people move home or change their circumstances we are not able to put a permanent stop on letters.

We may need a couple of minutes of your time.
As it's our duty to ensure that everyone in the UK who needs a Licence has one, we may visit your home to check that a licence is not required. Unfortunately, it's neccessary to do this as when we make contact on these visits, a quarter of people are found to need a TV licence. Please be
assured that this is a routine visit, and will take no more than a few minutes.

The Law states that you must be covered by a TV Licence if you watch or record Television programs on any device, as they're being shown on TV. This includes TVs Computers, mobile phones, games consoles, digital boxes and DVD/VHS recorders.

If your situation changes, please let us know. . . . .


Well, They say that   "The Law states that you must be covered by a TV Licence"   etc, but strictly speaking, that isn't true. It only counts, if you have a Contract with them, for TV Coverage. (Which you do, as soon as you buy a TV Licence) Where you sign, at the Post Office, this signature is legally binding in Court, as a Contract. As is anything you sign when they come to the door, and ask for your details. (Which you are under no obligation to provide) So when you subsequently fail to renew your annual subscription "Licence Fee", you are deemed to have broken the Contract. And are Legally liable under the terms of the Contract.
However, if you have never had any agreement of any kind, Contracting them to provide this "Service" for you, then you are under no Legal obligation when they turn up and say, "Oi, you owe us Protection money for your TV Licence, and the TV service you receive".

Not if you didn't Contract them to provide the service in the first place, you don't. That would be like a bloke with a bucket of water, in the street, washing your parked Car's Windscreen, outside your house, then knocking on your door, saying that you owed him £15, for his Services.

That's the same reason why I'm not on the Electoral roll. Council "Tax" is not a Tax at all. The Local Authority is not the Government, it's a Unitary Trust, and operates under the same Legislation as a Private Limited Company. Which means, yet again, to owe them Money for any Service provided, they must be Contracted, by the Customer, (You) to provide the Service. And the Contract you sign, is cleverly called "The Electoral Roll". But if you don't sign it, then you're not Contracting them to provide any Services. So they can't expect you to pay them, just because they say so.

And ever since that Mad, Slavering Bitch introduced it, in the 80's as The Poll Tax, I haven't paid a fucking penny of it.
I actively took part in the Poll Tax Riots a series of high profile Civil Disobedience Campaigns, The Class War and Stop the City  Riots protests in the 80's and early 90's, I got my head split open by the Filth more times than I care to remember, (Split a few of their's too) Served Prison time for Public Order Offences, Assault on Plod, and non-payment of whatever Fines they tried to make me pay.

So I'm hardly going to just bend over the barrel now, with my tack hole nice and goatsed, so this latest shower of thieving bastards can extort me at their leisure, am I? I 'd rather eat my own shit, thank you very much.

[BadBeast]

They've never even got hold of my name, because I'm not on the Electoral Roll

How on earth do you dodge the 1000 quid fine?

There is only a £1000 fine if you are taken to Court for Breach of Contract, and the Court order you to pay your 'subscription'. So then you'll owe your Licence fee, and a few pounds Court Costs.

If, subsequently you then fail to pay, tthe Court can fine you up to £1000, but that will be for breaching a Court Order, NOT for not paying your Licence fee.