I require some experienced diamond miners. Oh, and a rocket.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

^This.

Actually, I'd get a fall guy to do it for me, I suspect the people at DeBeers are the type to engage in revenge killings.

Preemptive orbital bombardment, use some of the diamonds to buy a clean up crew/death squad.
Jeez, usually it's me who's thinking small. You've already gone to another planet for tons of cheap diamonds. "Lock on phasers. Fire at will Mr. Worf."

[Don Coyote]

^This.

Actually, I'd get a fall guy to do it for me, I suspect the people at DeBeers are the type to engage in revenge killings.

Preemptive orbital bombardment, use some of the diamonds to buy a clean up crew/death squad.
Jeez, usually it's me who's thinking small. You've already gone to another planet for tons of cheap diamonds. "Lock on phasers. Fire at will Mr. Worf."

OMG IT'S AN ORBITAL BARRAGE...OF DIAMONDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Nephew Twiddleton]

^This.

Actually, I'd get a fall guy to do it for me, I suspect the people at DeBeers are the type to engage in revenge killings.

Preemptive orbital bombardment, use some of the diamonds to buy a clean up crew/death squad.
Jeez, usually it's me who's thinking small. You've already gone to another planet for tons of cheap diamonds. "Lock on phasers. Fire at will Mr. Worf."

OMG IT'S AN ORBITAL BARRAGE...OF DIAMONDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Or diamond focused laser fire.

[Cainad (dec.)]

are you all out of your minds

Nigel is the only one who's even close to being on the mark here, with Cain in close second far as I can tell


if DeBeers didn't have the kind of chokehold that they have today on world gem diamond supply, diamonds would be way cheaper. It's all control of supply, and motherfucking MARKETING

I want you all to imagine me marketing goddamn SPACE DIAMONDS to the wealthiest people on Earth. Assholes will spend scads of money to have the incredible privilege of being the classiest diamond-wearer in the Rich Assholes Club.

And then, with the capital I've made by selling to the wealthiest 0.05% of the world, I'll up production and shipping from the Diamond Planet just enough to start lowering the price to something purchasable by the wealthiest 1%. This is where the cash and blowjobs really start coming in, and a whole separate industry arises around the appraisal and fapping over SPACE DIAMONDS.

Then, with all of THAT filthy lucre lining my intestines pockets, I'll up production to the level where the SPACE DIAMONDS can be sold in those advertising pages of SkyMall and similar magazines, the ones that try to sell you fancy-ass watches and sapphires for $299.99, so I can start lapping up the greasy, fatty MoneyDrippings from the upper middle classes and make WealthGravy.

Twenty years later, I use my massive capital to fund a minor media event, in which suddenly everyone becomes nostalgic for the old-fashioned Earth Diamonds... because while no one was looking, I bought up as many Earth Diamonds as I could with my incredibly deep pockets and now control the supply of THOSE diamonds as well.

Space Diamonds become passe, and the new thing becomes Retro Diamonds. A whole movement of idiots and bloggers emerges over the return to Earth Diamonds, and I will fleece everyone all over again.


Cainad,
totally not making a mockery of economics

[Triple Zero]

I WANT A GIRL WITH A MIND LIKE A DIAMOND

[Phox]

I WANT A GIRL WITH A MIND LIKE A DIAMOND

Flawed and created from extreme pressure? Well, hello sailor. 

[Dalek]

Just sayin'

[Whatever]

are you all out of your minds

Nigel is the only one who's even close to being on the mark here, with Cain in close second far as I can tell


if DeBeers didn't have the kind of chokehold that they have today on world gem diamond supply, diamonds would be way cheaper. It's all control of supply, and motherfucking MARKETING

I want you all to imagine me marketing goddamn SPACE DIAMONDS to the wealthiest people on Earth. Assholes will spend scads of money to have the incredible privilege of being the classiest diamond-wearer in the Rich Assholes Club.

And then, with the capital I've made by selling to the wealthiest 0.05% of the world, I'll up production and shipping from the Diamond Planet just enough to start lowering the price to something purchasable by the wealthiest 1%. This is where the cash and blowjobs really start coming in, and a whole separate industry arises around the appraisal and fapping over SPACE DIAMONDS.

Then, with all of THAT filthy lucre lining my intestines pockets, I'll up production to the level where the SPACE DIAMONDS can be sold in those advertising pages of SkyMall and similar magazines, the ones that try to sell you fancy-ass watches and sapphires for $299.99, so I can start lapping up the greasy, fatty MoneyDrippings from the upper middle classes and make WealthGravy.

Twenty years later, I use my massive capital to fund a minor media event, in which suddenly everyone becomes nostalgic for the old-fashioned Earth Diamonds... because while no one was looking, I bought up as many Earth Diamonds as I could with my incredibly deep pockets and now control the supply of THOSE diamonds as well.

Space Diamonds become passe, and the new thing becomes Retro Diamonds. A whole movement of idiots and bloggers emerges over the return to Earth Diamonds, and I will fleece everyone all over again.


Cainad,
totally not making a mockery of economics

[Persona Facade]

Gems? Gems are truly outrageous. They are truly, truly, truly outrageous.

[Don Coyote]

Gems? Gems are truly outrageous. They are truly, truly, truly outrageous.

Try harder.

[Rumckle]

Gems? Gems are truly outrageous. They are truly, truly, truly outrageous.

Have you seen the price of potato gems lately!? It's criminal!

[Phox]

Gems? Gems are truly outrageous. They are truly, truly, truly outrageous.

Try harder.

It's sad, but you and I may be the only ones who got that so far. 

[Faust]

I WANT A GIRL WITH A MIND LIKE A DIAMOND

completely transparent and fingered by old women?

[Faust]

I WANT A GIRL WITH A MIND LIKE A DIAMOND

cold and lifeless?

[The Johnny]

I WANT A GIRL WITH A MIND LIKE A DIAMOND

cold and lifeless?

Sharp and bright.