The CALM Act

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I saw a Woman walking her little Dog earlier, and when her Dog took a crap, she bagged it, (OK so far, that's normal) but then took out a little bit of tissue paper, and wiped her Lakeland Terriers arse before moving on. That's hilarious.

TOTAL COST TO YOU?

[Bebek Sincap Ratatosk]

Goddamn, why do people think they have some kind of right to be entertained for free?

I do.  Not by TV, but by the endless freak parade as you and the rest of the planet slither by me.  Free market asstards, commies, and other libertarian types are a hoot, but they are hardly alone in the list of Unfortunate Things That Make Roger Laugh.  There's also the drips that think magic is real, the scabby little tards that show up explaining what Discordia is, the stupid fucking hippie loveburgers jacking off about the "singularity", etc.

All stupid fucking primates, and all funny as hell...And it doesn't cost me a fucking dime.

[BadBeast]

I saw a Woman walking her little Dog earlier, and when her Dog took a crap, she bagged it, (OK so far, that's normal) but then took out a little bit of tissue paper, and wiped her Lakeland Terriers arse before moving on. That's hilarious.

TOTAL COST TO YOU?

Fuck all, and it cracked me up!

[BadBeast]

I'm going to keep an eye out for her, to see if she does it every time.

[Adios]

I'm going to keep an eye out for her, to see if she does it every time.

Next time run out with a wet wipe screaming she missed a spot.

[BadBeast]

Funnily enough, I think her Dog's called Spot. Or it fucking should be. (Short for "Spotless Rectum III")

[Whatever]

In regards to Roger and LMNO's posts above, I would like to attempt to retract the attitude I was dishing out at those who didn't deserve it, when I should have saved it just for Niamh.

Niamh, if the only insult you can think up to throw at me when I call you lazy for being lazy is to make a Canadian joke it only shows you have not being paying enough attention... my faults are numerous and perfect fodder for zingers, why mock me for the accidental circumstance of the place I was born when there is so much more you could be mocking?

Yeah, and you know me so well to be able to call me lazy.  I really don't care, you were an ass so I was a bitch.  

If you had bothered to read my post, and realized I said you couldn't leave the room because of just how loud commercials were in comparison to the tv shows.....  I wasn't joking, I was serious.  It really is that much of a difference.

Doesn't matter, I'm done, I'm sorry I made smart ass bitchy remarks about your country and your sports.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

On the other hand, I don't let machines dictate my actions.  If the TV gets too loud all of a sudden, I will teach it obedience.

Failing that, I may take it out on my cable provider, who actually sets that shit up.

[hooplala]

[Bebek Sincap Ratatosk]

... take it out on my cable provider, who actually sets that shit up.

There goes Roger, riding the high wire on the correct motorcycle!

[The Good Reverend Roger]

... take it out on my cable provider, who actually sets that shit up.

There goes Roger, riding the high wire on the correct motorcycle!

All the better to scatter my "blessings".

Seriously, a bit of legislation to stop them from being annoying cunts IN MY LIVING ROOM isn't half as bad as a few things I just thought up.  Especially given that Comcast is also really big on trying to claim ownership of the interbutts, despite the fact that all they are is an ISP.

[BadBeast]

On the other hand, I don't let machines dictate my actions.  If the TV gets too loud all of a sudden, I will teach it obedience.

Failing that, I may take it out on my cable provider, who actually sets that shit up.

You don't have to scratch very deep to see the inner Luddite!  Smash those Looms of commercial carnality,  Sleazing and leching their product past the door, up the stairs, and tucked up nicely in your subconscious like a the Post Hypnotic "Buy me now" triggers that they are.  Bless.

It's the really real thing, Neo!  None of that "Nurture / Nature Red pill, Blue pill" bollocks, this one will have it's claws in your nadsack well before you even think to mute the fucker! With the added bonus of Audience participation. It will make you love it like Ice Cream. Then slowly leach your life away over the years while you subscribe to it's "Fruity, Zingy flavour." Or whatever.

Because we are all worth it!

[Whatever]

On the other hand, I don't let machines dictate my actions.  If the TV gets too loud all of a sudden, I will teach it obedience.

Failing that, I may take it out on my cable provider, who actually sets that shit up.

I don't have cable.  I mentioned that without the cable buffer it was an even greater difference in volumes between the shows and commercials.  

I have had my neighbors bang on the wall more than once because I went to the bathroom and a commercial came on so loud.  Which was my point.....

[The Good Reverend Roger]

You don't have to scratch very deep to see the inner Luddite!  

Belt loops are a sign of technology destroying our values.

Don't even get me started on zippers.

[LMNO]

On the other hand, I don't let machines dictate my actions.  If the TV gets too loud all of a sudden, I will teach it obedience.

Failing that, I may take it out on my cable provider, who actually sets that shit up.

I don't have cable.  I mentioned that without the cable buffer it was an even greater difference in volumes between the shows and commercials. 

I have had my neighbors bang on the wall more than once because I went to the bathroom and a commercial came on so loud.  Which was my point.....

Wait a sec.  What country do you live in?

I'm pretty sure the US stopped broadcasting analog TV last year.