The Hoopla Case Against Color

[hooplala]

Yesterday, I overheard a conversation between two homeless men who were waiting in a line for lunch at a nearby shelter. I was waiting for a bus on a bench close to where the two were standing, and happened to overhear one of them mention a 'golden apple'. This, of course, piqued my interest, so I began to listen to the two.

It turns out that the 'golden apple' the one man was referring to was what is commonly referred to as an 'Orange', but he is correct that at one time the fruit was called a golden apple - the conversation centered around the man holding the orange trying to convince the other man that the fruit he was holding was in fact blue, not orange.

"It's like this," said the man. "color works in opposites. When you look at an Orange the light bounces off the Orange, and back to your eye. But, the thing is, the thing is this: the Orange absorbs all the colors of the white light, and only bounces back the color orange to your eye. So, really, the Orange is any color BUT orange."

"I don't get it." said the other man. "Why does it look orange to us, then?"

"Because that's the only color bouncing back to your eye. It looks orange because orange is bouncing back. The eye works on opposites. We actually see things upside down, but our eyes correct the image so that we see it normally. And, we usually see in negative, but the eye corrects for that too."

"That's fucked." the other man answered aptly.

It was at this point that I turned to the two men. "I'll tell you what's more fucked. Color doesn't exist at all."

They both just stared at me. I continued: "Think about this: Everything is made from molecules, right? Well, what color are molecules?"

The one man shrugged, and the other said: "I don't know."

I winked. "Exactly. That's because molecules don't have any color. And, if everything is made from molecules, and molecules have no color, than de facto NOTHING has color."

Before either man could respond I disappeared in a puff of smoke.

[Lies]

What colour was the smoke?

[Phox]

What colour was the smoke?

Turquoise.

[The Johnny]

What colour was the smoke?

Like the colour of molecules.

[Don Coyote]

This gave me angry lulz.

You are a bad man Hoopla.

[hooplala]

I do what I can.

[Jenne]

This gave me angry lulz.

You are a bad man Hoopla.

This, though I didn't have ANGRY lulz, just lulzy lulz.

[Cramulus]

This is what happens when you inadvertently invoke Eris in your private conversations. Some nutjob will appear, drop some kind of gnostic mystery, and vanish mysteriously.

[AFK]

Okay, so in what is probably a poor attempt at humor, I was going to post some witty quote from Stevie Wonder to be all ironic and stuff.

But then doing some Googling I see an article on Wikipedia that lists famous people with  synesthesia.  And apparently Stevie Wonder experiences colors from sound.  

Though, I'm guessing this is probably a joke.  I'm pretty certain Stevie Wonder was blind from birth and I would think wouldn't have much of a concept of color.  

[Dysfunctional Cunt]

Bus stop fun!!   

[Cain]

Okay, so in what is probably a poor attempt at humor, I was going to post some witty quote from Stevie Wonder to be all ironic and stuff.

But then doing some Googling I see an article on Wikipedia that lists famous people with  synesthesia.  And apparently Stevie Wonder experiences colors from sound.  

Though, I'm guessing this is probably a joke.  I'm pretty certain Stevie Wonder was blind from birth and I would think wouldn't have much of a concept of color.  

I'm not so sure.  His kind of blindness is caused by detatched retinas, and can vary from being quite mild to total blindness.  If his sight degraded with age, he may have had some sense of colour.

Also googling around, if this was a spurious addition, it was a damn good one.  I've found articles in major news companies and on University pages which list him with it.  I mean, it's still possible - there was that guy who edited a Wikipedia entry a couple of years back and hoodwinked most of the global media.

[AFK]

Well, I didn't do much digging to validate, just seemed a little odd.

But I guess it might help to explain why he is such a bad-ass musician.

[P3nT4gR4m]

Bad ass musicians need no explanation. Some people are just bad ass musicians - period

[hooplala]

Like Tiny Tim.

[Dysfunctional Cunt]

Like Tiny Tim.

That was cruel and for that I give you.....

www.youtube.com/watch?v=skU-jBFzXl0