UNLIMITED GOP 2012 PRIMARY CANDIDATE THREAD

[Cain]

Ames has commentary on Clinton's speech

http://nsfwcorp.com/dispatch/bernie-bernbaum-does-america

And yet as putrid goes, this is nothing compared to the decomposing Democratic Party politics and bullshit wafting out of Charlotte. Whether it was Clinton whinging for hours on end that he and Obama have done everything the Republicans said we should do — and by golly, not even a thank you kiss? And golly, the Republicans themselves never live up to their own vision for America, they just go all crazy 'n' stuff — but Barack and I, we're the only ones carrying out the Republican right program! We killed welfare; I deregulated banking, while Barack upped the banking bailouts and completely screwed millions of homeowners after promising help; we both presided over massive increases in wealth inequality; I, not the Republicans, created NAFTA and destroyed American manufacturing, while Barack Obama has been working tirelessly to expand free trade agreements to ensure that Americans never work anywhere but as Wal-Mart store greeters ever again!

"You Republicans talk about busting unions — heck, Barack Obama has done more to bust teachers' unions than any y'alls! How do we know that we're more anti-union than you while pretending to be pro-union? Just look around you: Almost every union is boycotting this convention! [APPLAUSE, HIGH FIVES] While Republicans talk about cutting the deficit, I'm the one who slashed welfare and turned the deficits into surpluses [CHEERS] While President Obama's deficit commission laid out the first real Republican rightwing blueprint to privatizing Medicare and Social Security, and you and I all know that when Barack Obama is re-elected, he will privatize every last fucking social program in existence [CHEERS ON THEIR FEET] Because We. Are. The. Real. Republicans [APPLAUSE, CHEERS!]. It's that simple. Barack Obama created the framework for the Republican dismantling of every last program with the Simpson-Bowles Commission, and guess what? Paul Ryan voted it down. Really, who's the Republican Right-winger here, huh guys? America, I ask you: What else can we do to prove how Republican we really are? For forty years, we've been trying to score a date with the Republicans, and they just keep spurning us and saying mean things about us, and treating us like we're weird stalkers hanging outside their houses all the time. Well, guess what? The more you spurn us, the more Republican we'll be. It's almost like you want us to be this way or something, god you folks are really dumb! Like it or not, we're gonna just keep trying to be Republican, America! And that's why you oughtta vote for Barack Obama!"

I'm paraphrasing of course — the real text was far more sinister than that. It's why I went missing for those 36 hours. You can't listen to that, and be anywhere near "the grid" if you want to keep your sanity. This grotesque '90s-retro is worse than cultural stagnation. And pandering to the worst, wrongest failures this country's elite has every produced.

The pandering to the Republican right-wing vision is everywhere, even areas we're starting to take for granted. Like MSNBC — everyone on the "progressive" side decided that the answer to FoxNews was not better, smarter, meaner, tougher journalism, but rather, "a liberal FoxNews, only done better and more competently." In other words, exactly what the Democratic Party is to the Republicans. In fact, MSNBC's coverage of the convention was a fucking atrocity — it looked just like the shameless groveling propaganda TV coverage in Russia of Putin's United Russia party conventions. Uncritical (except for Chris Hayes), fawning (Chris Matthews, the poster child of American cultural stagnation, wet his pants on cue again for Obama — he actually called Obama's speech a "Home Run"), degrading.

It's insane, actually, and frightening, and delusional — and as doomed as it is smug, like a serious earnest version of that atrocious self-congratulatory "Rally for Sanity" event from a few years ago. That event celebrated de-politicized, disempowered middle-class liberal know-it-alls on the theory that they "get it." It was in fact nothing but another advance in sophisticated marketing masquerading as substantive politics. The perfect genetic code for the Democratic Party of Barack Obama. So they took the worst of the "Rally for Sanity" without even the few funny parts, extracted its DNA, made it as awful and vapid as it could be, and the message came out loud and clear: "We're the real Republican Party, we're just the sane version, ha-ha! We're sane Republicans and you're not! Joke's on you! Ha-ha! Boy are we competent and smart, and boy are you folks dumb and crazy!"

Clinton's act was bad enough, but my mental health was already fragile after Michelle Obama's performance the day before, when she pulled a Bernie Bernbaum act on America. Bernie Berbaum was the John Turturro character in "Miller's Crossing" — a sly, lying thief "who ain't got any etics" as the mob boss who wants Bernie Bernbaum whacked says.

So as Gabriel Byrne's character death-marches Bernie Bernbaum out into the forest to whack him, Bernbaum breaks down crying and begging for his life, falling to his knees covered in slobber and tears: "Look into your heart! Look into your heart!"

That was Michelle Obama's pitch to America: Forget about how badly we've screwed you, forget about how we completely poisoned progressive politics with our bait-and-switch of the past four years. Instead, she squirted a few with a "Look into your heart! Look into your heart, America!" performance that deserves a Golden Globe. But letting off a lying scumbag just because they've learned how to an squirt a few on cue is a fatal mistake, as Gabriel Byrne's character learned: As soon as he looked into his heart and let Bernie Bernbaum go, Berbaum turned around and did the only thing he Bernie Bernbaum knows how to do: Blackmailing Gabriel Byrne for letting him go rather than killing him as the mob boss ordered, and as Byrne should've done.

Like the Obamas, Bernie Bernbaum couldn't plead his case based on his record — he'd've been shot before he got out of the car if he brought it up. Same went with the Obama speeches: Skip over the record of lies and fraud over the past four years, and instead beg voters, with tears running down your face, "Look into your heart! Look into your heart!"

In fact the Team Obama/Dem Party "Bernie Bernbaum Strategy" is summed up neatly later in the film, when Gabriel Byrne once again fails in his mission to take out Bernbaum. It was at this moment that Turturro's Bernie Bernbaum revealed his true self: Glaring at Gabriel Byrne with pure, utter contempt (sort of the way the Democrat Establishment must view the idiots who still vote for them), and Bernbaum says: "What were you gonna do if you caught me? I'd just squirt a few and then you'd let me go again."

So they squirted a few — and we'll probably let them go again.

In the movie, Gabriel Byrne's character overcomes this weakness and whacks Turturro on his third try— but that's just Hollywood. In 2012 America, despite the worst economic crisis in 80 years and nothing fixed, Team Obama has clearly calculated that all it needs to do is squirt a few, and he'll get away with the past four years of ratfucking his supporters, and be given the opportunity to do it again to the same suckers.

[LMNO]

Ames has commentary on Clinton's speech

http://nsfwcorp.com/dispatch/bernie-bernbaum-does-america

"You Republicans talk about busting unions — heck, Barack Obama has done more to bust teachers' unions than any y'alls! How do we know that we're more anti-union than you while pretending to be pro-union? Just look around you: Almost every union is boycotting this convention! [APPLAUSE, HIGH FIVES] While Republicans talk about cutting the deficit, I'm the one who slashed welfare and turned the deficits into surpluses [CHEERS] While President Obama's deficit commission laid out the first real Republican rightwing blueprint to privatizing Medicare and Social Security, and you and I all know that when Barack Obama is re-elected, he will privatize every last fucking social program in existence [CHEERS ON THEIR FEET] Because We. Are. The. Real. Republicans [APPLAUSE, CHEERS!]. It's that simple. Barack Obama created the framework for the Republican dismantling of every last program with the Simpson-Bowles Commission, and guess what? Paul Ryan voted it down. Really, who's the Republican Right-winger here, huh guys? America, I ask you: What else can we do to prove how Republican we really are? For forty years, we've been trying to score a date with the Republicans, and they just keep spurning us and saying mean things about us, and treating us like we're weird stalkers hanging outside their houses all the time. Well, guess what? The more you spurn us, the more Republican we'll be. It's almost like you want us to be this way or something, god you folks are really dumb! Like it or not, we're gonna just keep trying to be Republican, America! And that's why you oughtta vote for Barack Obama!"

Um.  Wow.  That's pretty damn awesome.


And how is it that Democracy now isn't pressing charges, when they have videotaped evidence?  Is FL one of those "third party consent" states, where it's illegal to tape someone without their permission?

[Cain]

Democracy Now struggle to pay for cameras.

Adelson is a multi-billionaire.

It may seem like a slam dunk, what with the evidence, but their lawyers would no doubt draw it out, making it long and painful for Democracy Now, with an intent to bankrupt them.

[Juana]

Jesus.

In other news, Romney thinks his heritage is Mexican.

http://youtu.be/jk2ExIR_T2o

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Jesus.

In other news, Romney thinks his heritage is Mexican.

http://youtu.be/jk2ExIR_T2o

I want to see someone punch that guy in the face so bad.

[Luna]

Oh, my...

http://samuel-warde.com/2012/09/racist-asshat-clown-could-cost-romney-virginia/

This guy has been ruled to have qualified to appear on the state ballot in Virginia for President.  He's running on a platform of stop all abortions, stop all free trade agreements, stop all immigration (legal and illegal).  He may pull a lot of the conservative vote from Romney, in Virginia, which is a swing state Romney probably needs...

[Luna]

The Kansas State Objections Board is considering removing Obama from the ballot, since they have no absolute proof that he was born in America.

Do I need to add that the board is composed entirely of Republicans?

http://www2.ljworld.com/news/2012/sep/13/state-panel-wants-more-information-ruling-obamas-b/

[The Good Reverend Roger]

The Kansas State Objections Board is considering removing Obama from the ballot, since they have no absolute proof that he was born in America.

Do I need to add that the board is composed entirely of Republicans?

http://www2.ljworld.com/news/2012/sep/13/state-panel-wants-more-information-ruling-obamas-b/

This will be good.

[Luna]

The Kansas State Objections Board is considering removing Obama from the ballot, since they have no absolute proof that he was born in America.

Do I need to add that the board is composed entirely of Republicans?

http://www2.ljworld.com/news/2012/sep/13/state-panel-wants-more-information-ruling-obamas-b/

This will be good.

I just can't wrap my brain around this level of stupid.  I just don't get it.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

The Kansas State Objections Board is considering removing Obama from the ballot, since they have no absolute proof that he was born in America.

Do I need to add that the board is composed entirely of Republicans?

http://www2.ljworld.com/news/2012/sep/13/state-panel-wants-more-information-ruling-obamas-b/

This will be good.

I just can't wrap my brain around this level of stupid.  I just don't get it.

It's fucking KANSAS.  It's like Arizona, only you can grow food there.

[inode_buddha]

The Kansas State Objections Board is considering removing Obama from the ballot, since they have no absolute proof that he was born in America.

Do I need to add that the board is composed entirely of Republicans?

http://www2.ljworld.com/news/2012/sep/13/state-panel-wants-more-information-ruling-obamas-b/

This will be good.

I just can't wrap my brain around this level of stupid.  I just don't get it.

Its called cognitive dissonance.  I've got family members who are like that. Extremely conservative, to the point that it psycologically cripples them. They are simply unable to admit anything which might require them to change, an iota. This is why you have people saying black is white, war is peace, Big Brother, TSA, etc.

[Luna]

Couple of articles I found interesting:

http://eclectablog.com/2012/09/the-media-turns-on-romney-mark-halperin-on-the-romney-death-stench.html

http://eclectablog.com/2012/09/conservatives-rush-in-to-bail-out-romney-create-fake-controversy-over-obamas-presidential-daily-briefings.html

[ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞]

The Kansas State Objections Board is considering removing Obama from the ballot, since they have no absolute proof that he was born in America.

Do I need to add that the board is composed entirely of Republicans?

http://www2.ljworld.com/news/2012/sep/13/state-panel-wants-more-information-ruling-obamas-b/

This will be good.

I just can't wrap my brain around this level of stupid.  I just don't get it.

Its called cognitive dissonance.  I've got family members who are like that. Extremely conservative, to the point that it psycologically cripples them. They are simply unable to admit anything which might require them to change, an iota. This is why you have people saying black is white, war is peace, Big Brother, TSA, etc.

Perhaps of more import is that such beliefs earn one a position in a social ecology. Fucking with the tribe by challenging central beliefs could cost you a huge chunk, if not your entire system of social support—a prospect that only a few hundred years ago would mean almost certain death, and even to this day means severe stress that significantly increases the likelihood of death.

[Luna]

Funny, Romney hasn't made this part of his public campaign...

http://thinkprogress.org/election/2012/09/14/850061/romney-pornography-prosecutions/

He's been promising he'll prosecute pornography, across the board.

Also, this bit...  Recorded at a private fundraiser, saying that 47% of Americans are, essentially, lazy moochers who'll vote for Obama no matter what, because the government feeds, houses, and takes care of them.

http://thinkprogress.org/election/2012/09/17/862281/romney-writes-off-low-income/

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

http://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2012/09/where-are-the-47-of-americans-who-pay-no-income-taxes/262499/