Insight Into Anarchy's Subtle Nuances. London. 2011.

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

I doubt it'll even take that long.

[East Coast Hustle]

Fair enough.  I suspect this wont work and we'll be back to square one in two months, but I'm willing to be proven wrong.

More like half a day, but I had to try out of respect for mutual friends.

[Eartha-ly Delights]

Well I have had people butt hurt by that Vindaloo in the past, but never quite in this fashion.

I would like to clarify a few things on the subject of India, Cows, Chilis and Faith. Oh and some basic geography and world history lessons need to be taken first.. Just Junior High Stuff...nothing too challenging.


Now I foolishly thought that the title of a thread being VINDALOO CONTEST denoted some kind of invitation for people to enter different versions of a similar recipe and see whose was hottest. I was so wrong. Freaky obviously meant it was a competition to see who could lick her arse hardest about what a master chef she is.

Equally vain was my expectation that at least a few of you had heard of Goa or knew something of basic European Colonial History. No one does apparently. Not even Cain or One Eye...and at first glance they seemed half bright.. How sad for you all that your Laureates turn out to be wanting.

Now One Eye, so erudite and well informed yet he apparently doesn't know that Goa, on the Northernmost coastal tip of India, was colonised by the Portuguese in the 15th Century. Its population are as a result, primarily Muslim and Christian. Both of which faith groups eat beef. I think you'll all agree, that point about religious demographics is germane to refuting many of the criticisms I received on the beef issue.

Very few Hindus live in the region....they are by way of being quite the tiny minority. Many of them have relocated from the South....  public servants and Military administrators etc...There are quite a few of them there, but they tend to leave again after retirement and go home. So with a two generation Hindu presence (Just those Admin workers and their wives and children) the Hindu population and cultural influence in Goa is small and pocketed.

Being in Northern India the region can be somewhat volatile, though it is cushioned from a lot of strife by a strong regional culture of tolerance, good agriculture and tourism, which has made it quite prosperous. Its cities are very clean and far less crowded than one finds in the South. They are famous for their cooking. Goan food is renowned as sublime and they give cookery lessons in many of the better hotels, just so tourists can experience real Goan cuisine and gain knowledge about Goan culture and history by doing so.

It obviously was $150 well spent for me, as I seem to know ever so much more about the region than any of you.

So no, One Eye...they don't "worship cows or some shit". They do however, eat quite a bit of beef there. From my experiences in the region, I found that they do indeed regard the partaking of dead cow and chili to be quite a traditional element to their lives.

The chili you see, was brought to India when the Portuguese dropped off the first lot of colonists...so again, approx 500 years or more. Now I hope you all do see that 500 years of eating a thing makes it quite the tradition...well in most cultures anyway.

Now should you go, any of you, to Goa (as if) and attempt to tell those people that they worship cows and chili is not a traditional food, I suspect they would have words to say back on the issue.

In fact, please try it. I dare ya. I double dare ya!
Esp. Dok. I'd like to see him say that to a Goan chef. But I hope he can fucken run.

And Cain. This is just for you dear: The powder you buy "all over India" is hotter than fuck and is NOT cayenne based. Cayenne is one of the many varieties of chili that did NOT make it to India with the Portuguese.

The most popular form of chilli in India is the Jwala. A long, slender chili which when unripe has a deep green colour and turns to red as it ripens. Jwala means "Volcano" in Hindi and is extremely pungent.

But the chili which is most often dried and powdered in India, sometimes smoked and dried, and which may look like Cayenne powder but is many times hotter than it, comes from the birdseye, or Dhani chili. As I said. It is not cayenne powder you "find all over India" for the simple reason that cayenne is a pussy's chili...far too mild for the Indian palate. Dhani are also called "Devils Chilis" after their fiery pungency.

Both of these varieties of chili are far hotter than the Cayenne. I know this not due to the miracles of superficial web research, (thank you Nigel for the short lesson at EBG on New World Foods)  but because I learned to cook Indian food from Indian people. From Sikhs and Hindus, Muslims and Christians, Jains and Buddhists. Its a very mufti faith society,  innit?? And multi cuisined as well. (yes I know cuisined is not a word, but it ought to be)

I am sure Cain, you would know that though...being so perceptive and devastatingly bright as you are...and so sensitive to cultural mores and all...had you been to India yourself, rather than relying on gastronomic reports from those of your associates who appear to be more adventurous than you in their choice of holiday destination.

So back we go to my suspicion that this joint might be just the tiniest bit Amerocentrist , innit? For even people with a Eurocentrist view of the world, would have had some high school level knowledge of the culture and religions in former Portuguese colonies such as Goa...being that it's, well you know, a reasonably important period of world history.

And those with an even more inclusive world view might have known, somewhere deep deep down, that not all 1 billion Indians are Hindus.

Now how on earth did I have the temerity to suggest you're all a pack of xenophobic dumb cunts?


Thank you for the patience and courtesy vitriolic abuse, adolescent name calling and paranoid ravings with which I am sure this information will be received.




And no I am sorry, but no matter how hard I try I simply cannot go fuck myself.
I only wish I could. It would have saved me listening to men snore over the years.


(NB: The conspiracy theory shit was comedy gold btw...thanks for that...the Indian-IP-address-inspired-panic section of the skit was especially entertaining.)

[Cain]

Someone has never heard of Lal Mirch, then 

[Disco Pickle]

tl;df

I do like some goa trance on occasion.

[Freeky]

I'm sorry.  I don't speak "long-winded yapping."

[Cain]

You know, there is a study I read, a long time ago, in which people managed to make themselves look very smart by asking questions about random facts that only they knew. Apparently the onlookers only noticed that the askers knew and the answerers didn't, and failed to adjust for the unfairness of the underlying game.

But I'm sure Eartha-ly isn't trying to change the topic from her earlier hilariously ill-informed conspiracy theorizing to ground she feels safer on in order to try and prove her superior intellect.

And besides, everyone knows science is bourgeoise, and Eurocentric.

[Cain]

Fair enough.  I suspect this wont work and we'll be back to square one in two months, but I'm willing to be proven wrong.

More like half a day, but I had to try out of respect for mutual friends.

Yeah, I guess I was being overly generous.  Oh well.

[Freeky]

You know, there is a study I read, a long time ago, in which people managed to make themselves look very smart by asking questions about random facts that only they knew. Apparently the onlookers only noticed that the askers knew and the answerers didn't, and failed to adjust for the unfairness of the underlying game.

But I'm sure Eartha-ly isn't trying to change the topic from her earlier hilariously ill-informed conspiracy theorizing to ground she feels safer on in order to try and prove her superior intellect.

And besides, everyone knows science is bourgeoise, and Eurocentric.

Totally!  

[Freeky]

Holy Christ, is she still going on about the fucking vindaloo thread?  Jesus Fuck.

What part of "stupid recipe thread isn't worth my time to get upset over" do you not understand, you stupid mouthy bitch?  Do I have to fucking type slower?    Christ.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Oh look, the dog-cunt spoke up to justify her attacks on one of the nicest people on the board, and ignored the specific details about the criticisms about her

how convenient

She must be loaded up on booze again and ready to fire.

BUT SHE CAN JUSTIFY HOW BEEF IS TOTALLY LEGIT IN INDONESIAN COOKING. DERP.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

She is a fat, stupid, ignorant twat inclined to feel superior because she exists in an environment of fat, stupid, ignorant twats.

[Freeky]

Oh look, the dog-cunt spoke up to justify her attacks on one of the nicest people on the board, and ignored the specific details about the criticisms about her

how convenient

She must be loaded up on booze again and ready to fire.

BUT SHE CAN JUSTIFY HOW BEEF IS TOTALLY LEGIT IN INDONESIAN COOKING. DERP.

To be totally fair, I'm not as nice as I was when I first got here.  For starters, I enjoy dumping on fat, stupid, mouthy bitches who run their yaps too long.

[East Coast Hustle]

Fuck her. I tried to be reasonable and even borderline-conciliatory and she spit right in my face.

Even accused me of publishing her PI and then deleting it. And then, predictably, went on some bizarre anti-Roger diatribe, as though it was my job to play thought-police on the rest of the posters here.

Dear ED: How exactly do you reconcile your self-professed "anarchism" with your obvious burning need to make sure everybody thinks and acts in a manner that you feel is the correct one?

Shouldn't you start referring to yourself as an "Orthodox Iconoclast" instead?

Oh, and I'm pretty sure almost everybody here knows at least a bit about the history of Goa and the cultural genesis of their cuisine and why it differs so much from the milieu of "indian" food (which is really comprised of 7 or 8 different mother cuisines depending on how you count it).

I'm pretty sure everyone also knows how predictable you are and how easy it is to wind you up and watch you go. It's almost irresistably fun. You're like one of those pull-string dolls, only when we pull your string you stuff your head up your own ass and start screeching some muffled screed about identity politics.

Funny, isn't it, how the people who make the most noise about things like "equality" are the quickest to resort to language and thought processes that, essentially, serve no purpose but to delineate the most superficial of differences.

Nobody here cares what color your skin is, or what you have dangling from your crotch, or who you vote for.

For most of us, there are only two categories of mostly-hairless primates:

Are you a biped who knows what it means to walk upright? Or are you not?

[Pæs]

Isn't this thread about anarchy anymore?


I can't keep up.