Can I interrupt your very important business for just one second?

[P3nT4gR4m]

forcing it:

Yeah I'm there, in the cess pit of inertia. I can't remember the last time I did anything worth a fuck or drew anything cool, been spending my time reading shit here and tracing over shitty photographs just so I can say I'm doing something, just to stop myself shutting down entirely. Excuses? I got them by the bucketload - Work is busy as fuck, I'm tired, I been out a lot, a lot of the time I'm too drunk to see but the truth is it's all just excuses. I've forgotten who I am. I've forgotten what I do. Boredom has set into my boring mind. Next week I'm going kayaking and wild camping. Yeah, that's right, in Scotland, in fucking September! If I don't come back pissed off enough to spew fiery rage over everything that gets in my way then I really am a lost cause.

[Scribbly]

I needed to read this.

For the longest time, I've been feeling sorry for myself. Pretty stupid when I step back, and look at how incredibly lucky I am to have that luxury.

But it has been keeping me down. I read the stuff here as it comes up, and I feel stupid. I convince myself that I don't have anything worth adding to the conversation; someone else will say it better.

I have to get ready for bed. Exhausted after beating the hell out of my friends tonight, and I need to be up in a little over eight hours. But starting tomorrow (haha, excuses excuses...) I'm going to stop convincing myself nobody wants to hear what I've got to say.

Thanks, Dok.

[ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞]

I'm going to tell you about why I don't write much. It may sound like an excuse, but it's more about my perspective on communication, and why it works for me.

When thoughts are put into written words, especially for an audience I admire, I find my brain putting more stock in their worth regardless of merit. It's as though my brain observes the written expression and decides that's what I really think. After all, I wrote it and presented it didn't I? I put in all that work to make it understandable and coherent, therefore it must have been worth it.

The primate ego also gets aroused by the social factor, which urges one to stick with previously stated positions -- you don't want to be seen as wishy-washy, indecisive, equivocal. But in actuality, that does characterize most of my thought as I'm almost pathologically skeptical. RWHN has always used that saying, "Conclusions are merely where you stopped thinking," and I've taken that to heart a long time ago. In fact, it's probably partially blocking an artery at this point.

There's a certain intertia that written words develop that I find burdensome and socially mediated. My full screenname is a contorted amalgamation of this idea, designed in no small part to remind myself that my tongue rots on the net, that most communication occurs through nonverbal channels. The more that I rely on written language to communicate, the more these partially or fully unconscious faculties of expression get left to atrophy. Even on a conceptual basis, they are left out of the writing process. You don't have to worry about how your voice sounds, how your physical appearance and movements affect your message, how you smell, or how your eyes dart and connect with others. 

For most people, these concerns probably seem overblown. Maybe they are. Or perhaps your brain works differently than mine. I find the implicit authority of the written word hypnotizes us into false certainty about the ideas that emanate out of us, further distorted by our primitive need to appear consistent around other primates. Hypnotists tend to agree that all hypnosis is self-hypnosis, and self-hypnosis is merely when you allow words to pass by your internal critic unchallenged. What I'm suggesting is that writing for an audience seems to facilitate this process of eating your own menu.

Written language is a morass of bullshit and it takes a great amount of skill to avoid its pitfalls. That said, I agree that it is important to practice if one wants to get better at it. I write quite a bit, but I do so mainly to prepare my thoughts for speaking, not to present the written form to anyone directly. I find the rewriting process more valuable than what the writing looks like where I decided to stop. It's only because I have no other way to communicate with you remarkable spags that I have to resort to the small amount of posting I do here.

In a nutshell: quality over quantity or suffer the consequences of your own ill-chosen words.

Anyways, that's my contribution for forcing writing, for what it's worth.

[Eve Hill]

 I don't often post for similar reasons to a few here. I read what others have written and feel I can't say it better than it's already been said. Often too, I read something inspiring, start to type a reply, and then decide against it, thinking "Who are you kidding, stupid? You really think you're smart enough to add anything of value to this conversation?"
I love the essays, the rants, the political discussions, the original story ideas, the artwork. So much of it beautifully written and thought-provoking. Sometimes I read a post, gain a new perspective, and want to give the author a standing ovation and tell them how much their writing is helping me. But then, before I click "post", that little voice in my mind says something sarcastic like "Is that all you can add? Sycophantic drivel? Shut up." So I delete what I've written, click on mittens, and go back to reading.
I realize these are excuses. It wouldn't hurt me to post more. If I say something especially stupid, well, I'll take what comes and try to learn from it.

[Dimocritus]

I have found a place.

A place where money is simply a means to an end, and nothing more. Anything more than a decent "safety net," and you're doing it wrong; money is for trading, not accumulating. The value is in the goods, not the bio-survival tickets. In fact, if you do it right, there's a ton of stuff out there that's ripe for the taking, and if you play your cards right, you won't spend a dime. In a game of cheap thrills vs. priceless moments and people, it's clear to me where the value is. Some people pity me because I don't have money. I smile because I know that I am not a slave.

I have found a place.

A place where all emotions become one. Anger cut with tranquility. Sadness with cheer. Boredom with overstimulation. All these are colors on the emotional color wheel that appear contrasting. However, when the colors blur and mix, you get one white light. I have found a center where I can see that they are all one on the same wheel. I feel at the speed of c. I can no longer shit hate, I shit at the speed of c.

I have found a place.

It is a place where we form the simple beginnings of a being much larger than ourselves. A primitive amoeba even had to pull itself together out of basic organic chemicals. Multi-celled life pulls these individuals together, to form something much larger than itself, and so on. Vicious infinite regress, be damned. I can see my influence on others through my examples alone. That is all I can wish to achieve. I know that the key to changing that which is around me is changing myself. And people are not as stupid as you think, if you give them the opportunity to speak their mind. The best mind to fuck is your own.

There's nothing I can teach most people here, but I will continue to share what I have learned, none the less.

 

[Luna]

What was it I was saying about being intimidated to post after some people?

Dimo, luv, I'd kill for your talent with words.

[Juana]

I'm pretty sure my wrath button is broken. I think in the last six months I've gotten riled up enough to rant once, but usually I just point and laugh. There's no hate to shit because I'm not feeling any (and if I did, it would generally be mockery and button pushing like LMNO).

Quite frankly, I've been feeling outclassed and out of my depth on all fronts lately, which makes me reluctant to post. I don't particularly fear PDers' responses per se, but more that what I'm saying isn't as well thought-out as I want it to be or that it isn't actually anything new or valuable to the conversation.
Though I think I have an essay-y thing brewing, which I hope will please me well enough to post here.

[BadBeast]

I'm always posting stupid shit. No-one seems to mind too much. Or if they do, they're very diplomatic about it. (For which I'm very grateful) And I've been outclassed and out of my depth all my life. Never stopped me from learning to swim though. Or I'd have gone under by now.

[Epimetheus]

That's all well and good, Dok, but what if I'm just not rant-angry, and don't want to be?

[Luna]

That's all well and good, Dok, but what if I'm just not rant-angry, and don't want to be?

Post something else.  Fiction.  Poetry, if you've got it in you.  Point out some of the stupid shit in the world.

[I_Kicked_Kennedy]

That's all well and good, Dok, but what if I'm just not rant-angry, and don't want to be?

I posted this at 9:11pm.... Dun Dun duno

[Don Coyote]

I got no excuse.

[Juana]

I'm always posting stupid shit. No-one seems to mind too much. Or if they do, they're very diplomatic about it. (For which I'm very grateful) And I've been outclassed and out of my depth all my life. Never stopped me from learning to swim though. Or I'd have gone under by now.

Oh, it won't stop me. I'm not used to it, is all, and I need to find an even keel again. The only way to do that is keep going.

[Epimetheus]

That's all well and good, Dok, but what if I'm just not rant-angry, and don't want to be?

Post something else.  Fiction.  Poetry, if you've got it in you.  Point out some of the stupid shit in the world.

I can and have been doing that. I was asking specifically about rants.

[Doktor Howl]

That's all well and good, Dok, but what if I'm just not rant-angry, and don't want to be?

Then you kiss terrorists.  On the beard.