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ITT: TGRR helps you with your personals ads.

Started by The Good Reverend Roger, November 08, 2011, 06:09:42 PM

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Suu

#15
November 08, 2011, 08:09:04 PM
THAT'S FUCKING BRILLIANT!

Seriously, you can start a goddamn business with this.
Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."

Telarus

#16
November 08, 2011, 08:09:14 PM
This is amazing.  :lulz:
Telarus, KSC,
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(0o)  Tender to the Edible Zen Garden, Ratcheting Metallic Sex Doll of The End Times,
/||\   Episkopos of the Amorphous Dreams Cabal

Join the Doll Underground! Experience the Phantasmagorical Safari!

The Good Reverend Roger

#17
November 08, 2011, 08:16:05 PM
I'm going to have to split this off into a thread, for testamonial purposes.   :lulz:
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

LMNO

#18
November 08, 2011, 08:17:58 PM
This is one of the few times I wish I wasn't married.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#19
November 08, 2011, 08:26:49 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 08, 2011, 07:42:41 PM
Quote from: Nigel on November 08, 2011, 07:40:48 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 08, 2011, 07:33:00 PM
Quote from: Nigel on November 08, 2011, 07:19:13 PM
OMG another one!

QuoteHello what a lovely post. Although I am not a collector of whaling knives I appreciate a gal who is. I will bring the wetsuit and mayo, as well as a live chicken, quart of blue paint and rubber gloves!! No freaky stuff!!

That's it. From now on Roger is my official love guru.

THE LOVE DOCTOR IS IN.

TGRR,
Can write personals ads all damn day.  It's like a ticket to the sideshow.

I've gotten more good responses to that ad than I've gotten good responses to any ad I've written, ever. Including when I'm trolling. With you as my personal Love Guru, my OK Cupid will be blowing up in NO TIME.

I can top that.  Easy.

You might want to use an alternate account, though, because if I do, you'll be up to your ovaries in stone FREAKS.

I figured I could use my DoloresAzure account, because I'm pretty damn tired of all the frat boys hitting on that bitch.

Oh, and ML. Did I tell you that ML hit on her? LOL.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

The Good Reverend Roger

#20
November 08, 2011, 08:28:00 PM
Quote from: Nigel on November 08, 2011, 08:26:49 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 08, 2011, 07:42:41 PM
Quote from: Nigel on November 08, 2011, 07:40:48 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 08, 2011, 07:33:00 PM
Quote from: Nigel on November 08, 2011, 07:19:13 PM
OMG another one!

QuoteHello what a lovely post. Although I am not a collector of whaling knives I appreciate a gal who is. I will bring the wetsuit and mayo, as well as a live chicken, quart of blue paint and rubber gloves!! No freaky stuff!!

That's it. From now on Roger is my official love guru.

THE LOVE DOCTOR IS IN.

TGRR,
Can write personals ads all damn day.  It's like a ticket to the sideshow.

I've gotten more good responses to that ad than I've gotten good responses to any ad I've written, ever. Including when I'm trolling. With you as my personal Love Guru, my OK Cupid will be blowing up in NO TIME.

I can top that.  Easy.

You might want to use an alternate account, though, because if I do, you'll be up to your ovaries in stone FREAKS.

I figured I could use my DoloresAzure account, because I'm pretty damn tired of all the frat boys hitting on that bitch.

Oh, and ML. Did I tell you that ML hit on her? LOL.

What?  When?

We can tailor an ad for him, if you'd like.   :lulz:
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#21
November 08, 2011, 08:28:14 PM
Holy shit, this is amazing. Roger, you may see me married yet.

Most successful ad I've EVER placed, and amazing it hasn't been flagged yet.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#22
November 08, 2011, 08:28:59 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 08, 2011, 08:28:00 PM
Quote from: Nigel on November 08, 2011, 08:26:49 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 08, 2011, 07:42:41 PM
Quote from: Nigel on November 08, 2011, 07:40:48 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 08, 2011, 07:33:00 PM
Quote from: Nigel on November 08, 2011, 07:19:13 PM
OMG another one!

QuoteHello what a lovely post. Although I am not a collector of whaling knives I appreciate a gal who is. I will bring the wetsuit and mayo, as well as a live chicken, quart of blue paint and rubber gloves!! No freaky stuff!!

That's it. From now on Roger is my official love guru.

THE LOVE DOCTOR IS IN.

TGRR,
Can write personals ads all damn day.  It's like a ticket to the sideshow.

I've gotten more good responses to that ad than I've gotten good responses to any ad I've written, ever. Including when I'm trolling. With you as my personal Love Guru, my OK Cupid will be blowing up in NO TIME.

I can top that.  Easy.

You might want to use an alternate account, though, because if I do, you'll be up to your ovaries in stone FREAKS.

I figured I could use my DoloresAzure account, because I'm pretty damn tired of all the frat boys hitting on that bitch.

Oh, and ML. Did I tell you that ML hit on her? LOL.

What?  When?

We can tailor an ad for him, if you'd like.   :lulz:

It was right after we first broke up. I wrote back "LOL, you know this is me, right?" and then he was all freaked out.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

The Good Reverend Roger

#23
November 08, 2011, 08:29:48 PM
Quote from: Nigel on November 08, 2011, 08:28:14 PM
Holy shit, this is amazing. Roger, you may see me married yet.

Most successful ad I've EVER placed, and amazing it hasn't been flagged yet.

What gets you flagged?

I'll need to know this.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

The Good Reverend Roger

#24
November 08, 2011, 08:37:19 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on November 08, 2011, 08:17:58 PM
This is one of the few times I wish I wasn't married.

You can still run personals ads.  I do...With Enabler looking over my shoulder and laughing (IMPORTANT ADVICE:  IF YOU PLAN TO TROLL THIS WAY, INFORM YOUR SPOUSE.  Otherwise, she'll never believe it was a gag.  Women are funny that way, they think men might run around on them or something.)

Working on MY next one now.  BRB.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Cain

#25
November 08, 2011, 08:39:54 PM
I have been inspired.

After I have dinner and send some emails (OMG work wtf?) I shall work on a couple, and submit drafts here for "improvement", as well as all responses.

The Good Reverend Roger

#26
November 08, 2011, 08:47:02 PM
And here we go:

Quote43/M/Professional type.  Like many people in the heirarchy of American industry, I am a guilt-ridden, self-centered jackass, and I want to meet a woman who accepts that and takes me as I am.  My hobbies include being rude to the wait-staff, stiffing the bartender on tips, talking loudly during private conversations, and making cell phone calls while we eat dinner.  I am also prone to insulting people for no reason, just because I can...Concepts like the future and possible consequences are alien to me, and hopefully to you as well.

The right woman will be a virgin in public and a whore in bed, won't hesitate for an instant when I yell "HAMMER THAT YAM RIGHT UP MY GUTS, MISTRESS!", and knows how to discipline a naughty, naughty boy when he lays off 10 people because they were insufficiently attentive at the large-group staff meeting.

No gold diggers.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Cramulus

#27
November 08, 2011, 08:48:06 PM
:mittens: !!!

thread gets 10/10

Salty

#28
November 08, 2011, 08:53:53 PM
Oh, I'll take one of those, sir.
The world is a car and you're the crash test dummy.

The Good Reverend Roger

#29
November 08, 2011, 08:56:08 PM
Quote from: Alty on November 08, 2011, 08:53:53 PM
Oh, I'll take one of those, sir.


BRB, Filthy Assistant is talking at me.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.
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