I just had an epiphany.

[Thurnez Isa]

You know how it is when you go to the toilet and you take a REALLY BIG SHIT?  I mean a really gut wrenching, too much turkey chili, booze, and cheese shit.  Then you wipe and you can't get all of the shit off of you ass.  You keep wiping and wiping until the brown on the toilet paper is mixed with blood and your asshole hurts from all of the friction and it doesn't matter HOW MANY TIMES YOU WIPE YOUR ASS THE SHIT IS STILL THERE!

It's sort of like voting isn't it?

Did you just insult my ass?

[Phox]

To The Good Reverend Roger:
Doktor-General M. Phox greets you with all do respect. May your hairy body be free of lice for the rest of your days.
RE: The matter of words spoken by a certain party in regards to the alleged chemical weapons malfunction that resulted in the occurrence known only as "The Incident".

My advisers have informed that outright war is out of the question, but unmanned drones, courtesy of the Chicago PD, are allowed to cross sovereign borders and kill thousands, and this is not considered an act of war. However, i believe the rules of the Geneva convention state that the States of Illinois and Arizona are considered non-combatants, so all of this warfare must be conducted in New Mexico, Texas, Kentucky, and Missouri. While we feel that this is no great loss, we feel that it is necessary to give you the option of a more peacable resolution to this disagreement. If you so desire to avoid pointless bloodshed, then we shall settle this with a basketball game between all of the women that Wilt Chamberlain slept with and Magic Johnson's AIDS. (For those interested in betting, the odds are calculated at 5 to 1 in favor of the AIDS, 15-point spread).

Venomously Yours,
Doktor D. Jennifer Phox

I refuse, and drop my pance in your general direction.

Mostly because I want to see Kentucky take it in the shorts.

Then it is agreed. On February 4, overt warfare may begin in the streets of the aforementioned states. If you survive my imminent drone strike on ALBUQUERQUE! MUHAHAHAHAHA! 

Good.  Albuquerque is a bad place, full of bad people, and is so far away from Tucson that we wouldn't even NOTICE the radiation.  Hell, it might IMPROVE things.

That's the plan. I think that New Mexico needs more places that resemble smoking, radioactive craters, and that seems like a good starting point. And since often complain about the web-toed freaks making their way up the country, Kentucky is a good place to start nipping them in the bud. Then you can move on to the Missouri Ozarks (and if you accidentally Arkansas as well, no one will notice except Wal-Mart).

Leave the West high desert alone.  That's where Bernie Taupin lives.

Fair enough.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

You know how it is when you go to the toilet and you take a REALLY BIG SHIT?  I mean a really gut wrenching, too much turkey chili, booze, and cheese shit.  Then you wipe and you can't get all of the shit off of you ass.  You keep wiping and wiping until the brown on the toilet paper is mixed with blood and your asshole hurts from all of the friction and it doesn't matter HOW MANY TIMES YOU WIPE YOUR ASS THE SHIT IS STILL THERE!

It's sort of like voting isn't it?

Did you just insult my ass?

Are you runnng for Queen of Canada or something?