Yet ANOTHER bag of anon PM responses.

[Doktor Howl]

1.    ANOTHER spag sending me poetry to masturbate to.   Wow.  First, I don't find the word "nigger" to be exciting, no matter how many times you post it.  Second, it's been YEARS.  We have elected a new president.  The economy has collapsed.  All kinds of weird & horrible shit has happened.  There are other things to fixate on, besides me.

2.    No, there is no secret mod forum.  There is a forum in which we stick spambot threads and huge threads, to be deleted or archived, respectively.  No, we talk about you in PM, and we laugh.  It's not a nice laugh.  It's the kind of laugh Goldman Sachs people make when they think of Greece.

3.   I am not responsible for what happens on boards I don't post on.  No, seriously.  I've never BEEN to your board, so I can hardly be held accountable for barrels of butthurt and bent genitals that may or may not have occurred because someone reposted my stuff there.  Hey, maybe if you prevented content theft, you wouldn't have this problem.  I do appreciate that you erased the offending post, but I haven't got time to register so you can ban my IP address.  I do have to say that this may be the single most retarded question I've ever been asked, though.  Congratulations.

4.   No, I'm pretty sure Nibiru is a bunch of shit.  There are REAL calamities coming down the pike, and even if there WAS some weird mystery planet that comes by every bazillion years, what the fuck do you propose to do about it?  So, yeah, I WOULD continue paying my mortgage notes if I were in your shoes.  Of course, if I were in your shoes, I wouldn't believe in a gigantic killer planet that somehow doesn't have any gravitational effect on the solar system.  Get a new hobby.

5.   Yes, I said all that shit about Pagans.  No, I'm not sorry, and I couldn't give a shit less if you bring up my behavior at the next festival thingie you attend.  Go ahead and curse me or whatever it is you have in mind.  I live in fucking TUCSON, for Chrissakes.  What are you gonna fucking do to me that IT hasn't?  You fucking patchouli-smelling freaks are all the same.  It occurs to me, though, that I just HAVE to ask you:  Don't you feel just a little bit SILLY standing around in public parks, "casting a circle" or whatever it is you hippies do?  I mean, there are people walking around with their kids and their dogs, enjoying their weekend, and there YOU are, in your goofy fucking ceremonial robes and your Cutlery World "Athame", chanting hilarious shit.  People like you should have the K9 units sicced on you.  Bring back The Burning Times, I say.  Fuck You People.

6.   I call bullshit on you, you fucking board nanny.  You LOVE the fucking drama, just like most people do.  If you didn't, you wouldn't be so quick to jump in and try to "calm things down" by calling both sides assholes.  Of course we're assholes, you dumbfuck, we're on the Goddamn internet.  When you do stupid shit like that, you get what the hell you deserve.

7.   That argument is over.  I no longer care who does what with each other's work, unless someone complains.  I'm just not working on any more open-ended collaborative projects.  There are a few people I'll work with, but that's IT.  Also, I don't give a SHIT what your beliefs about "kopyleft" are...You can let people use YOUR work all you like.  You just can't choose for ME.  If you lack the basic respect for everyone around you that allows you to draw that distinction, then I fucking feel sorry for you.  In any case, leave my shit alone. 

8.   Don't preach to me about Jesus, you whackjob.  I drink with him, down at the Hotel Congress, and he doesn't say ANYTHING about the shit you're jabbering about.  Hint:  He's not as petty and bigoted as you, no matter how much you want him to be, so you can fucking hate people and have God on your side.  Shut the fuck up. 

9.   Nigel and I are bad people.  For that matter, so are LMNO, Cain, ECH, and your next door neighbor.  He hates your fucking guts, and he is plotting against you with your wife and your preacher.  He is NOT on your side.  I suggest you wear a tinfoil beanie to keep out the mind control rays, and to keep Nigel and I from whispering things in your ears while you sleep.  And stop looking under the bed.  It makes us bashful.

10.   Yes, drugs are magickle and they expand your mind.  I know.  And if SOME drugs are good, then MORE drugs are better.  You should get moving on that.  You should also do your preaching where people aren't as enlightened as we are.  It does no good preaching to the choir.  Also, I've never liked you, so where you get this idea that we're somehow buddies or some shit is utterly beyond me. 

[Cain]

I'm almost tempted to find out where the board that is being talked about in number 3 is.

[Doktor Howl]

I'm almost tempted to find out where the board that is being talked about in number 3 is.

At some point in the future, I'll post the URL for trollbait.

[Cain]

Excellent.  I also have a strong suspicion that 6 and 9 are to the same person, if not part of the same conversation.

[Doktor Howl]

Excellent.  I also have a strong suspicion that 6 and 9 are to the same person, if not part of the same conversation.

Actually, they're not the same person.  I try to never use PMs from the same person twice in these things, or I'd never be able to do anything else.

[Oysters Rockefeller]

Every time I hear about anon, they're slightly crazier than I remember.

Well, except this time. In which they're even slightlier crazy than that.

[Doktor Howl]

Every time I hear about anon, they're slightly crazier than I remember.

Well, except this time. In which they're even slightlier crazy than that.

Um.

These are responses to gloriously stupid PMs I recieve from posters, which I answer publicly without including the person's name or the original PM.  It has no connection to the group anon.

[Oysters Rockefeller]

Every time I hear about anon, they're slightly crazier than I remember.

Well, except this time. In which they're even slightlier crazy than that.

Um.

These are responses to gloriously stupid PMs I recieve from posters, which I answer publicly without including the person's name or the original PM.  It has no connection to the group anon.

WOAH. Thought I read the word Anon in their a couple times. I think somebody put something in my coffee...

Well, nevermind on the above post, then.

edit: Just realized it's in the title...

[Cain]

Excellent.  I also have a strong suspicion that 6 and 9 are to the same person, if not part of the same conversation.

Actually, they're not the same person.  I try to never use PMs from the same person twice in these things, or I'd never be able to do anything else.

Ah, a shame, but I suppose it's for the best.

[Doktor Howl]

Excellent.  I also have a strong suspicion that 6 and 9 are to the same person, if not part of the same conversation.

Actually, they're not the same person.  I try to never use PMs from the same person twice in these things, or I'd never be able to do anything else.

Ah, a shame, but I suppose it's for the best.

You wouldn't believe how often I get PMs accusing me of WRECKING DISCORDIA FOREVER.  I hardly bother with them anymore.  This time, I got a raft of them accusing me and Nigel of being big poopyheads out to trash PD and all that is Good & Right in the world today, so I picked two and ran with them.

[Cain]

What's really funny is that I got none - despite knowing several people were ranking my (practically nonexistant) role in the events just behind you two.

[Doktor Howl]

What's really funny is that I got none - despite knowing several people were ranking my (practically nonexistant) role in the events just behind you two.

I'm a shit magnet, Cain. 

[Freeky]

  Another good haul.

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

While it's horrible that these douchebags target you, Dok, it is funny that they think you magickally become a passive target in PM, who will just take this shit and smile about it.

[Doktor Howl]

While it's horrible that these douchebags target you, Dok, it is funny that they think you magickally become a passive target in PM, who will just take this shit and smile about it.

I don't think they think at all.  I think they just have this loud buzzing noise in their heads.