Internet Diseases, #1: The TGRR Effect

[Doktor Howl]

The "TGRR Effect" is an infliction usually found among noobs (though some rare cases in established users have been reported) and is not unlike the famed Indian Monkey Trap which is essentially a large gourd with a hole in it.  The gourd is filled with nuts and tied to a tree.

The hole is big enough so a monkey can reach its hand inside and grab the nuts in its fist... but NOT big enough to pull the closed fist full of nuts out.  The monkey is smart enough to to reach its hand inside the gourd to get the nuts, but not smart enough to realize that it needs to unclench its fist and drop the nuts in order to get its hand out.  The monkey is greedy and doesn't want to let go of the nuts.

The monkey is trapped by its own greed and stupidity.  One simply goes out and collects the monkeys from the traps, sets them up again and viola!  Test animals for the pharmaceutical industry's insatiable maw.

For the record, I am NOT calling anyone "greedy" or "stupid".

I'm just saying that sometime you just gotta let go of the nuts.

Okay for now,
Dok

[Elder Iptuous]

you do slather your nuts with gorilla glue from time to time, Dok, and the punji sticks you fix to the walls of the gourd point inward...

[Doktor Howl]

you do slather your nuts with gorilla glue from time to time, Dok, and the punji sticks you fix to the walls of the gourd point inward...

Another way to describe the effect is this:

When you argue with someone like TGRR, it's like both of you grab each other's nuts and squeeze.  You suffer a disadvantage in this contest, as TGRR likes that shit.

This is of course not restricted to TGRR, it's just that there's a seemingly endless number of people waiting in line for TGRR.

[Triple Zero]

"But surely, if instead of my fist, I stick my dick in, I'll be able to get my nuts out?"

[Doktor Howl]

you do slather your nuts with gorilla glue from time to time, Dok, and the punji sticks you fix to the walls of the gourd point inward...

What do I have to do with it?

I mean, that's true, but I am a man of SCIENCE, not some dead backwoods preacher man.

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

 

Thread delivers.

[Elder Iptuous]

you do slather your nuts with gorilla glue from time to time, Dok, and the punji sticks you fix to the walls of the gourd point inward...

Another way to describe the effect is this:

When you argue with someone like TGRR, it's like both of you grab each other's nuts and squeeze.  You suffer a disadvantage in this contest, as TGRR likes that shit.

This is of course not restricted to TGRR, it's just that there's a seemingly endless number of people waiting in line for TGRR.

that does pose a problem....
(as an aside, i wonder if the old marquis ever ran into a true masochist during his works...)

What do I have to do with it?

I mean, that's true, but I am a man of SCIENCE, not some dead backwoods preacher man.

oops... 
a case of mistaken identity. i failed to notice your badge.

[Doktor Howl]

you do slather your nuts with gorilla glue from time to time, Dok, and the punji sticks you fix to the walls of the gourd point inward...

Another way to describe the effect is this:

When you argue with someone like TGRR, it's like both of you grab each other's nuts and squeeze.  You suffer a disadvantage in this contest, as TGRR likes that shit.

This is of course not restricted to TGRR, it's just that there's a seemingly endless number of people waiting in line for TGRR.

that does pose a problem....
(as an aside, i wonder if the old marquis ever ran into a true masochist during his works...)

What do I have to do with it?

I mean, that's true, but I am a man of SCIENCE, not some dead backwoods preacher man.

oops... 
a case of mistaken identity. i failed to notice your badge.

I don't know what you're talking about.
I've never met you before in my life.
That story sounds like utter bullshit.
I wasn't there and it wasn't me.
I am not in denial.  Shut up.