Introductions, part V: Don't Say We Never Warned You.

[Payne]

N00blings, the collection plate shall be passed round shortly. I ran out of beer and I am fucking thirsty. Contribute generously, for your soul does hang in the balance.

Also, I hate you all, and wish you miserable and short careers on this forum, an inability to ever post anywhere else without fearing that the guy you are posting at is actually Roger in a tutu, and permanant sideways erections.

That is all.

You're omitting an even more hideous possibility.

That you are continuously in a tutu anyway, one crafted from your locks of flowing nether-hair?

That, and the fact that if I WAS wearing a tutu, two things would be self-evident:

1.  You wouldn't be able to see it, and

2.  It would be by now a permanent fixture, having fossilized in place with ancient scrotal sweat and vindaloo farts.

You truly are a wondrous creature, and proof that one or more gods, or fewer, exist.

PRAISE BE!

[Luna]

N00blings, the collection plate shall be passed round shortly. I ran out of beer and I am fucking thirsty. Contribute generously, for your soul does hang in the balance.

Also, I hate you all, and wish you miserable and short careers on this forum, an inability to ever post anywhere else without fearing that the guy you are posting at is actually Roger in a tutu, and permanant sideways erections.

That is all.

You're omitting an even more hideous possibility.

That you are continuously in a tutu anyway, one crafted from your locks of flowing nether-hair?

That, and the fact that if I WAS wearing a tutu, two things would be self-evident:

1.  You wouldn't be able to see it, and

2.  It would be by now a permanent fixture, having fossilized in place with ancient scrotal sweat and vindaloo farts.

You truly are a wondrous creature, and proof that one or more gods, or fewer, exist.

PRAISE BE!

The mind boggles.

[President Television]

Hello, I'm Uncle Wallified. I'm not actually new here, but I've been so incredibly shy for the past six months or so that I think I actually have to formally reintroduce myself just to get back in the habit of talking to people without having horrible panic attacks. I find this development troubling.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Hello, I'm Uncle Wallified. I'm not actually new here, but I've been so incredibly shy for the past six months or so that I think I actually have to formally reintroduce myself just to get back in the habit of talking to people without having horrible panic attacks. I find this development troubling.

Just ask yourself, "What would your avatar do?"

Take hallucinagenics, and beat up random strangers, that's what he'd do.  I don't suggest you do that, come to think of it.

[President Television]

Hello, I'm Uncle Wallified. I'm not actually new here, but I've been so incredibly shy for the past six months or so that I think I actually have to formally reintroduce myself just to get back in the habit of talking to people without having horrible panic attacks. I find this development troubling.

Just ask yourself, "What would your avatar do?"

Take hallucinagenics, and beat up random strangers, that's what he'd do.  I don't suggest you do that, come to think of it.

I'm told that I overthink things.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Hello, I'm Uncle Wallified. I'm not actually new here, but I've been so incredibly shy for the past six months or so that I think I actually have to formally reintroduce myself just to get back in the habit of talking to people without having horrible panic attacks. I find this development troubling.

hey there, new guy!

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Hello PD.

I am Huh, and I should probably lurk more. That's torn it I guess.

You've been lurking for I while haven't you?

I should think you're about ready for initiation.

Judging by what I've been reading here lately, I think I'll need to brush up on my writing skills, and read a whole bunch more first.

Thanks for your welcomes, not sure how much I'll be able to contribute myself at this stage but I'll have a go.

Hey there, new guy!

[Freeky]

Hey there, forum. I'm not new either, but I don't think I ever formally introduced myself.

Also it's 2 am and I think I'm being funny. I'm going to wake up and say "oh God dammit." When I see this again.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Hello, I'm Uncle Wallified. I'm not actually new here, but I've been so incredibly shy for the past six months or so that I think I actually have to formally reintroduce myself just to get back in the habit of talking to people without having horrible panic attacks. I find this development troubling.

Just ask yourself, "What would your avatar do?"

Take hallucinagenics, and beat up random strangers, that's what he'd do.  I don't suggest you do that, come to think of it.

I'm told that I overthink things.

Didn't out previous & glorious president G.W. Bush tell us to "think with our gut"?  That shit on the top of your spinal cord is nothing but trouble.  It's like reading books...They're tricky, and can give you all manner of dangerous ideas.

Just jam your dick in the grinder and stand there with a hopeful smile on your face.  Thinking only gets in the way.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Hey there, forum. I'm not new either, but I don't think I ever formally introduced myself.

Also it's 2 am and I think I'm being funny. I'm going to wake up and say "oh God dammit." When I see this again.

Hey  there, new guy!

[Triple Zero]

Hey there, forum. I'm not new either, but I don't think I ever formally introduced myself.

Also it's 2 am and I think I'm being funny. I'm going to wake up and say "oh God dammit." When I see this again.

Hey  there, new guy!

Hey there, new guy!

[standvast]

Hi ya ~

i used to be a mirelurk, but not any longer.
me emerge from the murky !!!

[Placid Dingo]

Hi ya ~

i used to be a mirelurk, but not any longer.
me emerge from the murky !!!

Hey thar Dutchspag.

[SmogofCogs]

Hi! i'm here. i'm human. i'm a pretty awkward slow learning type. i get the sense that i may be able to learn something here. i feel a range of emotions and thoughts. lately i've been trying to cultivate more sense of direction in life (yes i'm still naive enough to think i can control or even know where i'm going) because i'm young and mostly purposeless and i react to that with anxiety and depression. i'm all like "jeez luk wut mozart did wen he wuz ur age, you no good piece of shit" but alas i find no solace in committing to(o) much, or realizing that shame is not the game. sometimes there's not even pleasure in the thought of expanding my head space. but more important than direction (because fuck that shit) i'm just trying to feel it as it comes, keep pinching myself and keep a stable memory so i don't integrate (death is scary bro)

i'm open to/for interpretation

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Hi! i'm here. i'm human. i'm a pretty awkward slow learning type. i get the sense that i may be able to learn something here. i feel a range of emotions and thoughts. lately i've been trying to cultivate more sense of direction in life (yes i'm still naive enough to think i can control or even know where i'm going) because i'm young and mostly purposeless and i react to that with anxiety and depression. i'm all like "jeez luk wut mozart did wen he wuz ur age, you no good piece of shit" but alas i find no solace in committing to(o) much, or realizing that shame is not the game. sometimes there's not even pleasure in the thought of expanding my head space. but more important than direction (because fuck that shit) i'm just trying to feel it as it comes, keep pinching myself and keep a stable memory so i don't integrate (death is scary bro)

i'm open to/for interpretation

I like what you have to say, new guy. Welcome!