No, Russia. Just...no.

[Cain]

Oh goddamnit, will you stop living up to your goddamn national sterotype of vodka-obsessed drunkards?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-20726939

Two elephants have been saved from the deadly Siberian cold by drinking vodka, Russian officials say.

They say the animals had to be taken out into the bitter cold after the wooden trailer they were travelling in caught fire in the Novosibirsk region.

The elephants, aged 45 and 48, suffered frostbite to the tips of their ears amid temperatures of -40C (-40F)

But they were warmed up by two cases of vodka mixed with warm water, one official was quoted as saying.

"They started roaring like if they were in the jungle! Perhaps, they were happy," the official told Russia's Ria Novosti news agency.

Or maybe, just maybe....they were really, really drunk.

[Elder Iptuous]

so russians tend to treat vodka as a panacea in the same manner that stoners treat pot?

[Cainad (dec.)]

  When in doubt, apply alcohol to the problem! Things will either get better, or they'll get hilarious.

[Xooxe]

If these are the same elephants that were getting wasted last winter then I'm putting money on that fire being deliberate.

knowwhatimsayin?

[Remington]

Warning: do not keep your pet Russian near an open flame, as they are very flammable.

[Dildo Argentino]

I once saw a documentary about the Siberian version of the yeti. The very simple method that the "Russian scientists" hit on for catching the beast (though it didn't work) was to leave a bottle of vodka on a stump by the edge of the forest. "If it's a man of any description at all", they were reasoning, "it'll come out and drink this".

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I once saw a documentary about the Siberian version of the yeti. The very simple method that the "Russian scientists" hit on for catching the beast (though it didn't work) was to leave a bottle of vodka on a stump by the edge of the forest. "If it's a man of any description at all", they were reasoning, "it'll come out and drink this".

They should have just asked us.  Everyone knows Yeti prefer bourbon and/or rum.