PROPHECY FOR A DOOMED SPECIES (Who WANTS to know the future?).

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Is it a plot to run everyone off the land?  Nope.  Done already.  Is it a plot to make everyone stupid?  Naw.  The pain of "not getting it" makes everyone sharp as tacks.  Is it a plot to confuse reality with illusion?  I almost hope so.  Look at the world...Look at CNN.  That's reality.  My headscape is way better than that, and I hope yours is, too.

Is it the approach of the NWO?  Forget it...They took over in 1945 when our Nazis won the war against tyranny, and nobody's ever been free since.  Well, almost nobody.  Mohammed Ali was free, even in shackles.  But he wasn't your normal mutant.

Is it the triumph of the Free Market™?  No, no such animal, never was.  It's about as "free" and has about as level a playing field as did games of faro, back in the old days.  Yeah, it's a rigged game, but it's the only game in town, as Canada Bill Jones used to say.

Is it the bunker mentality of the United States, with schools beginning to look like fortresses and the entire population huddled behind their deadbolted doors and deadbolted hearts?  Is is the all-emcompassing, pants-shitting FEAR that grips every Good American™ from cradle to grave?  Is it the infinitely long line of marching morons, trudging to a Brave New World?  Naw, just kidding.  Nobody's afraid.  Unless they wake up in the morning, in which case they go all to pieces.

Is it the Bridges of Portland, the Desolation of Tucson, or the Horrible Grind of Providence?  Possibly.  In any event, that's what fate has in store for all of you sinners.  One day, you'll shiver so hard that you slip down the grate in the shower, and then here you are, staggering along under the FIST OF GOD...Which is to say, a sun so brutal that it's pixilated at the edges. 

You don't deserve that, of course...You're all good folks.  But in THIS universe, that's what's on your plate, deserved or not.  Nobody ever promised that judgement day was fair.  As above, so below, they say, and I think we can all agree that EARTHLY courts aren't known for fairness.

So, before that happens, may I humbly suggest that you find ways to enjoy your mortal existence?  May I suggest that you be extra-nice to your spouse or significant other?  May I suggest that you maybe SMILE a bit (as opposed to GRINNING), and just breathe?

Because there's sure as fuck no air in the afterlife.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I am uncertain as how to respond.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I am uncertain as how to respond.

The proper protocol is to stone me at this point, though that won't actually save you, any more than beating up the weather man will stop the rain.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Thats actually why theres largely female meteorologists in boston. We get too distracted by them to notice whether their predictions. We find out the hard way. Well we have kevin lemanowicz but then we have too much fun saying lemanowicz to notice what hes saying either. But id feel bad about stoning you roger and anyway i throw with the strength and accuracy of a 5 year old.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Thats actually why theres largely female meteorologists in boston. We get too distracted by them to notice whether their predictions. We find out the hard way. Well we have kevin lemanowicz but then we have too much fun saying lemanowicz to notice what hes saying either. But id feel bad about stoning you roger and anyway i throw with the strength and accuracy of a 5 year old.

A brief reading of the old testament will show you that this sympathy is misplaced.

Prophets should be stoned.  Buncha smartasses, if you ask me.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Yeah but i also know what happens as a result of even making fun of a prophet.

Twid
not saying a damn thing about how much of your scalp is showing.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Yeah but i also know what happens as a result of even making fun of a prophet.

Twid
not saying a damn thing about how much of your scalp is showing.

Keep it up, jackass.  This country is CRAWLING with bears.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Yeah i dont want to end up as an ingredient in the next post of cooking with lmno.

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

You don't deserve that, of course...You're all good folks.  But in THIS universe, that's what's on your plate, deserved or not.  Nobody ever promised that judgement day was fair.  As above, so below, they say, and I think we can all agree that EARTHLY courts aren't known for fairness.

Great post, Roger.

I have always wondered why pagan folk think saying 'as above so below' makes here so much more awesome. Don't they realize they're pulling the Summerlands down? Piling so much karmic shit up on the other plane that it will materialize and manifest as a giant floating barge of feces . . . and then promptly squash us all?

This is what we have and there isn't any escaping. You can wish and dream but that doesn't help with getting through the now. What you can do is suck it up, wake up, go out there and do something about it.

Maybe.

[Cainad (dec.)]

Good stuff, Roger. Everyone's spending so much time being afraid of the wrong things, and they're falling ass over teakettle to be dicks to each other about it.

You don't deserve that, of course...You're all good folks.  But in THIS universe, that's what's on your plate, deserved or not.  Nobody ever promised that judgement day was fair.  As above, so below, they say, and I think we can all agree that EARTHLY courts aren't known for fairness.

Great post, Roger.

I have always wondered why pagan folk think saying 'as above so below' makes here so much more awesome. Don't they realize they're pulling the Summerlands down? Piling so much karmic shit up on the other plane that it will materialize and manifest as a giant floating barge of feces . . . and then promptly squash us all?

This is what we have and there isn't any escaping. You can wish and dream but that doesn't help with getting through the now. What you can do is suck it up, wake up, go out there and do something about it.

Maybe.

Right on.

"As above, so below..."

HAVE YOU TAKEN A GOOD HARD LOOK AT THE BELOW, BUCKO?! WHAT DOES THAT TELL YOU ABOUT THE ABOVE?

[Nephew Twiddleton]

You don't deserve that, of course...You're all good folks.  But in THIS universe, that's what's on your plate, deserved or not.  Nobody ever promised that judgement day was fair.  As above, so below, they say, and I think we can all agree that EARTHLY courts aren't known for fairness.

Great post, Roger.

I have always wondered why pagan folk think saying 'as above so below' makes here so much more awesome. Don't they realize they're pulling the Summerlands down? Piling so much karmic shit up on the other plane that it will materialize and manifest as a giant floating barge of feces . . . and then promptly squash us all?

This is what we have and there isn't any escaping. You can wish and dream but that doesn't help with getting through the now. What you can do is suck it up, wake up, go out there and do something about it.

Maybe.

The Greek gods are worse than us. Mount Olympus is a veritable soap opera/reality show.

The Celtic/Norse gods KILL each other. Let that sink in. Immortals KILL each other.

The Egyptians? Let's put this corpse back together and sew a dildo on so I can fuck Osiris back to life.

JUST WHAT THE HELL ARE PAGANS DOING TO THEIR GODS?!?!?!

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Addendum- Celts and Norsemen like Law and Order
Egyptians like snuff porn.

Let's not even get into the Sumerians (ok, let's. Enki is a serial murderer who drowns his victims because they're making TOO MUCH NOISE. HAY! LET'S SET OFF SOME MORE FIREWORKS!!!! HEY ENKI!!!!)

[Nephew Twiddleton]

And last but not least, YHWH.

He doesn't like gay sex. Or lobster. Or bacon double cheeseburgers. Or skyscrapers.

HAY YAHWEH!!!!!
AMERICA LOVES YUO!!!!

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

And last but not least, YHWH.

He doesn't like gay sex. Or lobster. Or bacon double cheeseburgers. Or skyscrapers.

HAY YAHWEH!!!!!
AMERICA LOVES YUO!!!!

I refuse to believe in anything that doesn't support bacon double cheeseburgers.

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

You know, I think I stopped believing in God when I was told "God made man in His image." Because every adult I knew at the time was a piece of fucking shit. Clearly, this meant God was a piece of shit too. And I didn't need more of that in my life.

That's where my road to paganism began.