Conquest of the Planet of the Bride of the Son of the Return of the Open Bar

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Is this the result of Filthy Assistant's you-aren't-the-boss-of-ME-ism?

Sorry, missed this earlier.

A direct result.

All that was required was to NOT FUCK WITH IT.

Can you at least write him up for it?

No.  He is not a direct report of mine anymore, and Jim isn't talking to anyone right now.  He's locked in his office and he swears at you if you knock on the door.

[Cain]

Well, I just checked my mail.  My actual mail, not email.

I just found a contract for the job in Switzerland.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Well, I just checked my mail.  My actual mail, not email.

I just found a contract for the job in Switzerland.

Outstanding!

[Juana]

Is this the result of Filthy Assistant's you-aren't-the-boss-of-ME-ism?

Sorry, missed this earlier.

A direct result.

All that was required was to NOT FUCK WITH IT.

He just needs to stop.

Well, I just checked my mail.  My actual mail, not email.

I just found a contract for the job in Switzerland.

[Cain]

Yeah.  I'm a bit surprised myself.  Just checking the contract now, to make sure everything is as expected.

[Junkenstein]

Well, I just checked my mail.  My actual mail, not email.

I just found a contract for the job in Switzerland.

I'd expect nothing less. Fine work that man. Now screw them on the T&C's.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Is this the result of Filthy Assistant's you-aren't-the-boss-of-ME-ism?

Sorry, missed this earlier.

A direct result.

All that was required was to NOT FUCK WITH IT.

He just needs to stop. And also what Nigel said.

There is no stop.  There is only continual fuckery, and the more he fucks up, the more he is determined to fix everything.  I can't stop him, short of mayhem.

Think of me as the engine room officer on a Carnival Cruise Liner.  The purser has decided how to make the engines run more efficiently, and the captain won't do shit, and every time I turn my back, we're dead in the water again.

[Junkenstein]

There is only continual fuckery, and the more he fucks up, the more he is determined to fix everything.  I can't stop him, short of mayhem.

Just hammering out a small ding.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Well, I just checked my mail.  My actual mail, not email.

I just found a contract for the job in Switzerland.

That's AWESOME!

[The Good Reverend Roger]

There is only continual fuckery, and the more he fucks up, the more he is determined to fix everything.  I can't stop him, short of mayhem.

Just hammering out a small ding.

Can't see the pics.  Will check them out tonight.

AFTER pills, not before.

[Cain]

Picked up some sort of cold/flu thing. Still gone to work. Woe betide any fool who calls in sick today. I'm 400 miles from home and sick and STILL HERE.

What do you do for a living again?  I always kinda assumed you worked in oil, up on a rig in the North Sea or something.

I'm in Demolition and unfortunately tend to be based away from home a lot. At the moment "a lot" is pretty much all the fucking time.

Well, at least in demolition you get to blow stuff up at the end.

I mean, it must be somewhat cathartic.

[Juana]

Is this the result of Filthy Assistant's you-aren't-the-boss-of-ME-ism?

Sorry, missed this earlier.

A direct result.

All that was required was to NOT FUCK WITH IT.

He just needs to stop. And also what Nigel said.

There is no stop.  There is only continual fuckery, and the more he fucks up, the more he is determined to fix everything.  I can't stop him, short of mayhem.

Think of me as the engine room officer on a Carnival Cruise Liner.  The purser has decided how to make the engines run more efficiently, and the captain won't do shit, and every time I turn my back, we're dead in the water again.

Oh man.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

On the plus side, I've figured out how to get the saggers out.

I'm going to have to dismantle the whole fucking thing.

I am not at all upset about this.  No.  I currently exist in the eye of the storm, a small oasis of calm and serenity.  It's nice and quiet here, and everything is going to be okay.

Good goddamn. 

"YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE CRAZY TO WORK HERE, BUT IT HELPS."

"SOMEONE HAS A CASE OF THE MONDAYS."

The above statements and/or witticisms would be all that it would take.  Seriously.

You need to shout them. Pre-emptively.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Picked up some sort of cold/flu thing. Still gone to work. Woe betide any fool who calls in sick today. I'm 400 miles from home and sick and STILL HERE.

What do you do for a living again?  I always kinda assumed you worked in oil, up on a rig in the North Sea or something.

I'm in Demolition and unfortunately tend to be based away from home a lot. At the moment "a lot" is pretty much all the fucking time.

Well, at least in demolition you get to blow stuff up at the end.

I mean, it must be somewhat cathartic.

I had a friend that did tear-out demolition.  I never ever saw him looking miserable.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Is this the result of Filthy Assistant's you-aren't-the-boss-of-ME-ism?

Sorry, missed this earlier.

A direct result.

All that was required was to NOT FUCK WITH IT.

Can you at least write him up for it?

No.  He is not a direct report of mine anymore, and Jim isn't talking to anyone right now.  He's locked in his office and he swears at you if you knock on the door.

Go ask him if he has a case of the Mondays.

I dare you.