Payne, all your Pixie issues SOLVED in 9 easy payments!

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Get her a Chia-TGRR.  Everyone loves Chia-TGRR.  It shows up as an oversized, vaguely humanoid lump.  Water it daily, and watch the hair grow out of places you didn't know you had places!  Hours of fun for the whole family and Pix will forgive your various and sundry transgressions.

Warning:  England is the absolute perfect climate for Chia-TGRR, so do NOT leave outside, on account of what happened to Machu Pichu.  Southampton would be overgrown in days, and then you'd have to fuck off to the Midlands until the Spaniards arrive to convert everyone.

Do not put your Chia-Roger where it can see a television, as we cannot be held responsible for the results of its blind rage.  Do not attempt to comb your Chia-TGRR, as severe damage to your hands may result.  Hose your Chia-TGRR down with Malathion once per week to minimize various vermin infestations.

Call today.  Supplies are limited.  Nine easy payments of YOUR VERY SANITY and it's yours to enjoy forever.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

What happens to a Chia-TGRR if you put on Taylor Swift?

[Pope Pixie Pickle]

Get her a Chia-TGRR.  Everyone loves Chia-TGRR.  It shows up as an oversized, vaguely humanoid lump.  Water it daily, and watch the hair grow out of places you didn't know you had places!  Hours of fun for the whole family and Pix will forgive your various and sundry transgressions.

Warning:  England is the absolute perfect climate for Chia-TGRR, so do NOT leave outside, on account of what happened to Machu Pichu.  Southampton would be overgrown in days, and then you'd have to fuck off to the Midlands until the Spaniards arrive to convert everyone.

Do not put your Chia-Roger where it can see a television, as we cannot be held responsible for the results of its blind rage.  Do not attempt to comb your Chia-TGRR, as severe damage to your hands may result.  Hose your Chia-TGRR down with Malathion once per week to minimize various vermin infestations.

Call today.  Supplies are limited.  Nine easy payments of YOUR VERY SANITY and it's yours to enjoy forever.

Can i use it to scare New Housemate if he acts up?

[The Good Reverend Roger]

What happens to a Chia-TGRR if you put on Taylor Swift?

It dies.

And then it begins to decompose.  Horribly.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Get her a Chia-TGRR.  Everyone loves Chia-TGRR.  It shows up as an oversized, vaguely humanoid lump.  Water it daily, and watch the hair grow out of places you didn't know you had places!  Hours of fun for the whole family and Pix will forgive your various and sundry transgressions.

Warning:  England is the absolute perfect climate for Chia-TGRR, so do NOT leave outside, on account of what happened to Machu Pichu.  Southampton would be overgrown in days, and then you'd have to fuck off to the Midlands until the Spaniards arrive to convert everyone.

Do not put your Chia-Roger where it can see a television, as we cannot be held responsible for the results of its blind rage.  Do not attempt to comb your Chia-TGRR, as severe damage to your hands may result.  Hose your Chia-TGRR down with Malathion once per week to minimize various vermin infestations.

Call today.  Supplies are limited.  Nine easy payments of YOUR VERY SANITY and it's yours to enjoy forever.

Can i use it to scare New Housemate if he acts up?

Yes.  The threat being that the Chia-TGRR always needs more bone meal.

I'm ORGANIC!

[The Good Reverend Roger]

But not biodegradable.  Not so's you'd notice, anyway.

[Payne]

Get her a Chia-TGRR.  Everyone loves Chia-TGRR.  It shows up as an oversized, vaguely humanoid lump.  Water it daily, and watch the hair grow out of places you didn't know you had places!  Hours of fun for the whole family and Pix will forgive your various and sundry transgressions.

Warning:  England is the absolute perfect climate for Chia-TGRR, so do NOT leave outside, on account of what happened to Machu Pichu.  Southampton would be overgrown in days, and then you'd have to fuck off to the Midlands until the Spaniards arrive to convert everyone.

Do not put your Chia-Roger where it can see a television, as we cannot be held responsible for the results of its blind rage.  Do not attempt to comb your Chia-TGRR, as severe damage to your hands may result.  Hose your Chia-TGRR down with Malathion once per week to minimize various vermin infestations.

Call today.  Supplies are limited.  Nine easy payments of YOUR VERY SANITY and it's yours to enjoy forever.

Sign me up!

Pixie is always pestering me for a pet, and the stick I found outside and called Ryan The Stick Insect is not longer doing the business.

[Pope Pixie Pickle]

Get her a Chia-TGRR.  Everyone loves Chia-TGRR.  It shows up as an oversized, vaguely humanoid lump.  Water it daily, and watch the hair grow out of places you didn't know you had places!  Hours of fun for the whole family and Pix will forgive your various and sundry transgressions.

Warning:  England is the absolute perfect climate for Chia-TGRR, so do NOT leave outside, on account of what happened to Machu Pichu.  Southampton would be overgrown in days, and then you'd have to fuck off to the Midlands until the Spaniards arrive to convert everyone.

Do not put your Chia-Roger where it can see a television, as we cannot be held responsible for the results of its blind rage.  Do not attempt to comb your Chia-TGRR, as severe damage to your hands may result.  Hose your Chia-TGRR down with Malathion once per week to minimize various vermin infestations.

Call today.  Supplies are limited.  Nine easy payments of YOUR VERY SANITY and it's yours to enjoy forever.

Sign me up!

Pixie is always pestering me for a pet, and the stick I found outside and called Ryan The Stick Insect is not longer doing the business.

A mecha kitten would do. Needs batteries and wont puke hairballs on the carpet.

[Payne]

What have I told you?

NO MORE ROBOTIC PUSSIES!

[Pope Pixie Pickle]

What have I told you?

NO MORE ROBOTIC PUSSIES!

BUT I WANT A MECHA KITTEN!

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

You know, they have the chia-Obama, I think someone would actually make a chia-Roger. Just think how easy it would be . . .

[Payne]

You know, they have the chia-Obama, I think someone would actually make a chia-Roger. Just think how easy it would be . . .

Easy to do.

Impossible to undo.

IT WOULD BE GLORIOUS!

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

You know, they have the chia-Obama, I think someone would actually make a chia-Roger. Just think how easy it would be . . .

Easy to do.

Impossible to undo.

IT WOULD BE GLORIOUS!

Terra cotta Rogers, in different poses, ready for the chia goo to be applied . . . man, that would be hilarious.

[Payne]

You know, they have the chia-Obama, I think someone would actually make a chia-Roger. Just think how easy it would be . . .

Easy to do.

Impossible to undo.

IT WOULD BE GLORIOUS!

Terra cotta Rogers, in different poses, ready for the chia goo to be applied . . . man, that would be hilarious.

No. Only one.

The world is not ready for more than one.

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

You know, they have the chia-Obama, I think someone would actually make a chia-Roger. Just think how easy it would be . . .

Easy to do.

Impossible to undo.

IT WOULD BE GLORIOUS!

Terra cotta Rogers, in different poses, ready for the chia goo to be applied . . . man, that would be hilarious.

No. Only one.

The world is not ready for more than one.

D'oh. >.> Which one, then? :P