Dear PD...

[Left]

All this reminds me, must to go back to school.

I went insane in 2009, and I think dropping out at that point was a good choice.
But I'm functional again.
...I have half a social science undergrad.
I need more school to be a therapist.

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

I've just recently come to accept that at some point I have lost all passion for anything.

That's explained by this:

Whether it is a game, a book, a tv show, etc.

You have to leave the couch.

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

Nigel, you're almost there. Home stretch. And Dok's right, you're gonna OWN this.

And..."BALLPIPE"? Is this something I want to know about? 

And RWHN sold his soul for a fucking paycheck. I think Bill Hicks used to call it "SUCK SATAN'S COCK".

[AFK]

Actually, I just traded it for a stick of gum.  It came with baseball cards.

[AFK]

And fuck, don't let life own you.  You own life!

[Cainad (dec.)]

And..."BALLPIPE"? Is this something I want to know about? 

You know how the FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST is the worst, stupidest goddamn contest ever to exist?

It actually isn't. Ballpipe is a sort of primordial, even more horrifying contest of DUMB that has a lot less mass appeal.

Two dudes stand on either end of a long, thin aluminum pipe and place the ends of the pipes against their junk (jeans are standard ballpipe gear, of course). A round lasts until someone surrenders, and a draw is when the pipe bends far enough to touch the ground.

There are no winners.

[Doktor Howl]

And..."BALLPIPE"? Is this something I want to know about? 

You know how the FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST is the worst, stupidest goddamn contest ever to exist?

It actually isn't. Ballpipe is a sort of primordial, even more horrifying contest of DUMB that has a lot less mass appeal.

Two dudes stand on either end of a long, thin aluminum pipe and place the ends of the pipes against their junk (jeans are standard ballpipe gear, of course). A round lasts until someone surrenders, and a draw is when the pipe bends far enough to touch the ground.

There are no winners.

Everyone is a winner at ballpipe.  EVERYONE.

There's a video.

[Cainad (dec.)]

ta-da! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ohJVE_e070 <-- not safe for humanity. Nothing graphic, just insane.

[Doktor Howl]

I am still torn whether I like that one more than the diabetes one.

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

ta-da! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ohJVE_e070 <-- not safe for humanity. Nothing graphic, just insane.

How does Cram get people to DO shit like that? 

[Cainad (dec.)]

ta-da! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ohJVE_e070 <-- not safe for humanity. Nothing graphic, just insane.

How does Cram get people to DO shit like that? 

"College"

SUNY Purchase is a den of lunatics, from what I gather.

[Doktor Howl]

ta-da! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ohJVE_e070 <-- not safe for humanity. Nothing graphic, just insane.

How does Cram get people to DO shit like that? 

"College"

SUNY Purchase is a den of lunatics, from what I gather.

Also, "Cramulus".  The hot dog stand in Boston still makes me giggle.

[Don Coyote]

ta-da! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ohJVE_e070 <-- not safe for humanity. Nothing graphic, just insane.

How does Cram get people to DO shit like that? 

"College"

SUNY Purchase is a den of lunatics, from what I gather.

Also, "Cramulus".  The hot dog stand in Boston still makes me giggle.

I just...WHY THE FUCK

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

If they are dumb enough to do it then he's doing a public service.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Cain, TGRR, and ECH are stranded on a desert island when they find Aladdin's lamp.  A Genie appears and gives them each one wish.

Cain says "I wish that all the people at PD would just take the fucking time to READ what I'm saying to them, so they'd know who is fucking them and how."

TGRR says "I wish that all the people that have read my works could read well enough to UNDERSTAND my works, so they would SHUT UP."

ECH says "I just wish I had a new asshole, because this one's all worn out and prolapsed from evangelizing to the heathen."

And the Genie says "No, just kidding, I'm actually a hallucination.  You guys are all starving to death on a desert island."

Missed this somehow on my first read-through.