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Who's Who on PD.com

Started by Doktor Howl, July 19, 2013, 04:25:39 PM

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Doktor Howl

Molon Lube

Doktor Howl

Molon Lube

Doktor Howl

Molon Lube

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

"a large and very cross beaver"  :lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Freeky


Doktor Howl

Molon Lube

LMNO


Doktor Howl

Molon Lube

Doktor Howl

#53
Hit the character limit, sooo...

The Unwashed Masses, Part II
Coyote:
Picture:  Pending
AKA:  *grunt, whistle*

Coyote is a Welshman who lives in Seattle, WA.  He is infamous, even in that licentious city, for his perversions involving lizard-like humanoids he refers to as "kobolds", which appear upon inspection to be a cross between a gecko and Michele Bachmann.  Coyote has seen recent service in the US military, where he was an attack dog or something.  Perhaps a specially-trained marmoset.  It's all very classified, and he isn't talking, instead muttering some garbage about logistics, as if anyone would trust the Welsh with the supplies.

Coyote is famed in Seattle for his role playing skills (specifically, he can read, which gives him an enormous advantage), and is a founding member of a Bay City Rollers tribute band.  Turn ons include reptiles.  Turn offs include the very light of civilization itself.

Stella:
Picture:  http://i524.photobucket.com/albums/cc322/fennario99/08232012-012-1.jpg
AKA:  Fagbasket

Stella is an anthropologist who studied Texans in their native habitat.  All contact was lost with the expedition in 2006, and the worst is feared.  Her preliminary reports indicated that Texans are in fact technically human, in that they can breed with humans, but in her words "that's about it".  She reported that they have a crude system of government that seems to involve shouting a lot and male domination of females, with the full support of many of the females.  Later this year, she will be declared legally dead, on the 7th anniversary of her last dispatch.  Turn ons included rock n roll, turn offs included po'buckers.

Dimo:
Picture:  Pending.
AKA:  Cuddlefish, Filthy fucking Dago, Micheal Reagan.

Dimo is a classical musician in Providence, RI.  He despises anything less than the great Mozart, and will only perform in a tuxedo, as "that is what one does".  He is famed for the invention of the Carmina Burana Mosh Pit, which killed 500 members of the audience when torches were introduced to the melee.  Dimo is also an astologer, and spends all manner of time inventing excuses based on the positions of the stars and planets.  He supports (retroactively) the assassination of JFK, and believes that Obama is a reptoid from Kenya.  His apartment is lined with tinfoil, and he throws harpoons at the mailman.  Turn ons include clueless ladies right off the bus from Kansas.  Turn offs include holy water.

McGrupp:
Picture:  None provided.
AKA:  No known aliases.

McGrupp is PD's resident town drunk/village idiot, and has appeared in every John Wayne movie ever made, as "the old prospector" (which was kinda weird in Genghis Kahn, and we won't even talk about the porn remake of Hondo).  McGrupp is approximately 99 years old, and survives only due to the mechanical body built for him by Professor Cramulus, for which fiendish ends we shudder to imagine.  His turn ons include talking in an annoying voice and giving the hero useless advice.  His turn offs include actually finding gold in them thar hills.

Cainad:
Picture:  http://img823.imageshack.us/img823/604/rp3k.jpg
AKA:  Sally

Cainad is the lost tribe of the Jews.  He got lost in the Sinai approximately 4000 years ago, and wound up in some horrible East coast state, where he quickly fell under the influence of the perfidious Professor Cramulus.  Together, they spent the 1930s fucking with some emo German painter, and then blamed the mess on him, fleeing Berlin just ahead of the allied bombers.  They then turned their diabolical intentions on New York, resulting in the utter destruction of New York City's 5 bouroughs in 1953.  Then Cainad struck out on his own, and spent 5 years giving some drunken Senator from Wisconsin bad ideas, resulting in the McCarthy hearings, HUAC, and Elvis Presley.

More recently, Cainad has bent his basically rotten will on the music industry, forcing Nashville to promote Taylor Swift.  The resulting wave of suicides is a matter of public record.  Television, as well.  Do you know who the "Biggest Loser" is?  That's right.  It's you.  His turn ons include the cries of the anguished, the tears of innocents, and ham sammiches.  His turn offs include Truth, Justice, and The American Way.
Molon Lube

Doktor Howl

That's everyone who has asked for one.

Time to finish up the admin team.
Molon Lube

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

 :lulz: These are all excellent, but the McGrupp one is just exquisite.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Doktor Howl

Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on July 23, 2013, 06:15:53 PM
:lulz: These are all excellent, but the McGrupp one is just exquisite.

One of my favorites so far is Suu, back in post #2.
Molon Lube

McGrupp

 :lulz:  Eerily accurate. Still love the one for Hirley.

Suu

Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."

Junkenstein

With the change of a single word, that's almost worth shoving into my CV.
Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.