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TESTEMONAIL:  Right and Discordianism allows room for personal interpretation. You have your theories and I have mine. Unlike Christianity, Discordia allows room for ideas and opinions, and mine is well-informed and based on ancient philosophy and theology, so, my neo-Discordian friends, open your minds to my interpretation and I will open my mind to yours. That's fair enough, right? Just claiming to be discordian should mean that your mind is open and willing to learn and share ideas. You guys are fucking bashing me and your laughing at my theologies and my friends know what's up and are laughing at you and honestly this is my last shot at putting a label on my belief structure and your making me lose all hope of ever finding a ideological group I can relate to because you don't even know what the fuck I'm talking about and everything I have said is based on the founding principals of real Discordianism. Expand your mind.

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The Problem to all of your Solutions

Started by AFK, September 04, 2013, 01:16:22 AM

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AFK

Deliver yourself from evil.


How?  - you are asking me right now with the fervor of a meth-addled bus-stop jockey.


Simple.  Send me $29.95.  Wait beneath your mailbox for three days.


While you sit contemplate contenplations, including those that seem to bear some relevance to your current set of conditions.


On the third day, stand up, walk back to your house, and stop doing all of the shit that is bringing you down man.


You're welcome.
Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

The Good Reverend Roger

" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Nephew Twiddleton

Words of wisdom thread.

If you're on a path but the scenery never changes, you forgot to walk.
Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

AFK

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 04, 2013, 03:22:00 AM
RHWN's drunk again.   :lulz:




You sir are full of evil.


But I have your cure.


Send me $29.95.   Go to your room, put on some Jerry Cantrell. 


Then, fashion a pedestal out of spent paper towel tubes.  Place all of your deepest fears onto the pedestal.


Admire them in all of their fiery wrathiness.


Then, turn off your computer, call up some buddies, and go grab some brewskies.
Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

AFK

Quote from: Kim Jong Jesus on September 04, 2013, 03:25:28 AM
Words of wisdom thread.

If you're on a path but the scenery never changes, you forgot to walk.


I think you might have a touch of the evil, though it seems a little mild.


Send me $29.95.  Pour yourself a bowl of Trix.


Then, call someone you love.  Have a chat.  Exchange jokes.


The End.


Thank you, please drive through.



Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

Nephew Twiddleton

Quote from: I, Regulator on September 04, 2013, 03:41:04 AM
Quote from: Kim Jong Jesus on September 04, 2013, 03:25:28 AM
Words of wisdom thread.

If you're on a path but the scenery never changes, you forgot to walk.


I think you might have a touch of the evil, though it seems a little mild.


Send me $29.95.  Pour yourself a bowl of Trix.


Then, call someone you love.  Have a chat.  Exchange jokes.


The End.


Thank you, please drive through.

If you think you can get almost $30 out of me on any day, you're sadly mistaken.
Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

The Good Reverend Roger

" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

AFK

Quote from: Kim Jong Jesus on September 04, 2013, 03:42:59 AM
Quote from: I, Regulator on September 04, 2013, 03:41:04 AM
Quote from: Kim Jong Jesus on September 04, 2013, 03:25:28 AM
Words of wisdom thread.

If you're on a path but the scenery never changes, you forgot to walk.


I think you might have a touch of the evil, though it seems a little mild.


Send me $29.95.  Pour yourself a bowl of Trix.


Then, call someone you love.  Have a chat.  Exchange jokes.


The End.


Thank you, please drive through.

If you think you can get almost $30 out of me on any day, you're sadly mistaken.


We have a lay-away plan.
Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

Nephew Twiddleton

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 04, 2013, 03:43:48 AM
Funding cuts hurt everyone.

Ain't that the damn truth. Also, I'm temporarily Christian. Jesus gives me this shit for free, though the priests may try to guilty me out of a couple of quid. This guy's going to have to start up with the "but wait, there's more" to sweeten the deal.
Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: Kim Jong Jesus on September 04, 2013, 03:46:29 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 04, 2013, 03:43:48 AM
Funding cuts hurt everyone.

Ain't that the damn truth. Also, I'm temporarily Christian. Jesus gives me this shit for free, though the priests may try to guilty me out of a couple of quid. This guy's going to have to start up with the "but wait, there's more" to sweeten the deal.

He's no Ron Popieo, that's for sure.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Nephew Twiddleton

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 04, 2013, 03:47:26 AM
Quote from: Kim Jong Jesus on September 04, 2013, 03:46:29 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 04, 2013, 03:43:48 AM
Funding cuts hurt everyone.

Ain't that the damn truth. Also, I'm temporarily Christian. Jesus gives me this shit for free, though the priests may try to guilty me out of a couple of quid. This guy's going to have to start up with the "but wait, there's more" to sweeten the deal.

He's no Ron Popieo, that's for sure.

He's working to the infomercial spiel though. He's already offered me 9 easy installments.
Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: Kim Jong Jesus on September 04, 2013, 03:48:07 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 04, 2013, 03:47:26 AM
Quote from: Kim Jong Jesus on September 04, 2013, 03:46:29 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 04, 2013, 03:43:48 AM
Funding cuts hurt everyone.

Ain't that the damn truth. Also, I'm temporarily Christian. Jesus gives me this shit for free, though the priests may try to guilty me out of a couple of quid. This guy's going to have to start up with the "but wait, there's more" to sweeten the deal.

He's no Ron Popieo, that's for sure.

He's working to the infomercial spiel though. He's already offered me 9 easy installments.

Well, now that weed is trundling along towards legalization, he has to find SOMETHING to do.

Now, what about financing?
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Nephew Twiddleton

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 04, 2013, 03:50:45 AM
Quote from: Kim Jong Jesus on September 04, 2013, 03:48:07 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 04, 2013, 03:47:26 AM
Quote from: Kim Jong Jesus on September 04, 2013, 03:46:29 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 04, 2013, 03:43:48 AM
Funding cuts hurt everyone.

Ain't that the damn truth. Also, I'm temporarily Christian. Jesus gives me this shit for free, though the priests may try to guilty me out of a couple of quid. This guy's going to have to start up with the "but wait, there's more" to sweeten the deal.

He's no Ron Popieo, that's for sure.

He's working to the infomercial spiel though. He's already offered me 9 easy installments.

Well, now that weed is trundling along towards legalization, he has to find SOMETHING to do.

Now, what about financing?

:spittake: at your avatar.

Is it actually him though?
Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: Kim Jong Jesus on September 04, 2013, 04:00:22 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 04, 2013, 03:50:45 AM
Quote from: Kim Jong Jesus on September 04, 2013, 03:48:07 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 04, 2013, 03:47:26 AM
Quote from: Kim Jong Jesus on September 04, 2013, 03:46:29 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 04, 2013, 03:43:48 AM
Funding cuts hurt everyone.

Ain't that the damn truth. Also, I'm temporarily Christian. Jesus gives me this shit for free, though the priests may try to guilty me out of a couple of quid. This guy's going to have to start up with the "but wait, there's more" to sweeten the deal.

He's no Ron Popieo, that's for sure.

He's working to the infomercial spiel though. He's already offered me 9 easy installments.

Well, now that weed is trundling along towards legalization, he has to find SOMETHING to do.

Now, what about financing?

:spittake: at your avatar.

Is it actually him though?

Would we offer you impure product? 

" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Nephew Twiddleton

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 04, 2013, 04:01:04 AM
Quote from: Kim Jong Jesus on September 04, 2013, 04:00:22 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 04, 2013, 03:50:45 AM
Quote from: Kim Jong Jesus on September 04, 2013, 03:48:07 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 04, 2013, 03:47:26 AM
Quote from: Kim Jong Jesus on September 04, 2013, 03:46:29 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 04, 2013, 03:43:48 AM
Funding cuts hurt everyone.

Ain't that the damn truth. Also, I'm temporarily Christian. Jesus gives me this shit for free, though the priests may try to guilty me out of a couple of quid. This guy's going to have to start up with the "but wait, there's more" to sweeten the deal.

He's no Ron Popieo, that's for sure.

He's working to the infomercial spiel though. He's already offered me 9 easy installments.

Well, now that weed is trundling along towards legalization, he has to find SOMETHING to do.

Now, what about financing?

:spittake: at your avatar.

Is it actually him though?

Would we offer you impure product?

I don't know....

Why does that sound like a challenge to make me buy to alleviate my skepticism?

KJJ,
Curiosity killed the human.
Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS