Author Topic: Teen Exorcists  (Read 5154 times)

Nephew Twiddleton

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Re: Teen Exorcists
« Reply #15 on: September 11, 2013, 06:16:11 pm »
I'm also guessing Larson's diagnostic is about as fair a coin as a Scientologist's e-meter. That is to say, if you take the test, you're one of the 50% afflicted.
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Re: Teen Exorcists
« Reply #16 on: September 11, 2013, 06:31:18 pm »
"At first I lifted weights.  But then I asked myself, 'why not people?'  Now everyone runs for the fjord when they see me."


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Ben Shapiro

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Re: Teen Exorcists
« Reply #17 on: September 11, 2013, 08:36:24 pm »
There's a Bear Demon terrorizing all of North East Houston.

LMNO

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Re: Teen Exorcists
« Reply #18 on: September 11, 2013, 08:44:24 pm »
I have it on good authority that the Devil is running around in at least one of the Tucsons.

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Re: Teen Exorcists
« Reply #19 on: September 11, 2013, 09:14:55 pm »
yeah, it's $9.95 to find out if you're in the 50% of the population that has demonz

Flipping a quarter will only cost me 25 cents, and only while it's midair.
This is genius.
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Q. G. Pennyworth

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Re: Teen Exorcists
« Reply #20 on: September 12, 2013, 10:09:17 pm »
It's kind of interesting that teens would be put in this position.

Let us assume for the sake of argument that demonic possession is a real thing, since that's presumably what these girls actually believe.

It's a goddamn demon. It would seem highly irresponsible to send an untrained, psychologically incapable person. Other religious traditions that engage in the practice perform it rarely. Mainly because you really have to go out of your way to say, there's some freaky unexplainable shit going on here, so why not give this last option a shot? I am thinking primarily of the Catholic Church, where, as I understand it, you have to get authorization from the Pope himself to get the go ahead, and those authorizations are exceedingly rare, because 99.999999% of the time, it is due to some sort of mental illness in the patient. But the other end of it is that the exorcist has to be psychologically balanced in order to pull the ritual off. Teenagers are self-conscious and have fragile egos, and have dirty little private thoughts that a telepathic demon will exploit the fuck out of.

For the sake of argument: teenagers are at a point where they are in transition, and points of transition are where people are closest to "the supernatural" in some belief systems. Teenage girls specifically have been associated with poltergeists, and they were used in some areas for witch hunting. Virgin teenage girls (which these ladies undoubtedly profess to be) were the only way you could catch a unicorn. Also, virgin blood for sacrifices, etc. By this (largely historically inaccurate, but memetically robust) reasoning, virgin teenage girls would be very well suited for the job. They are close enough to the supernatural that they can affect it. Their conviction in their faith, and the conviction their marketers have in that faith, will prevent them from entertaining the notion that they could fail.

Also, why would you want someone psychologically sound to do this shit? No, you need someone who's REALLY GOOD at lying to themselves. Someone who can huff their own farts so hard they pass out without noticing the stench.

Nephew Twiddleton

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Re: Teen Exorcists
« Reply #21 on: September 12, 2013, 10:38:15 pm »
It's kind of interesting that teens would be put in this position.

Let us assume for the sake of argument that demonic possession is a real thing, since that's presumably what these girls actually believe.

It's a goddamn demon. It would seem highly irresponsible to send an untrained, psychologically incapable person. Other religious traditions that engage in the practice perform it rarely. Mainly because you really have to go out of your way to say, there's some freaky unexplainable shit going on here, so why not give this last option a shot? I am thinking primarily of the Catholic Church, where, as I understand it, you have to get authorization from the Pope himself to get the go ahead, and those authorizations are exceedingly rare, because 99.999999% of the time, it is due to some sort of mental illness in the patient. But the other end of it is that the exorcist has to be psychologically balanced in order to pull the ritual off. Teenagers are self-conscious and have fragile egos, and have dirty little private thoughts that a telepathic demon will exploit the fuck out of.

For the sake of argument: teenagers are at a point where they are in transition, and points of transition are where people are closest to "the supernatural" in some belief systems. Teenage girls specifically have been associated with poltergeists, and they were used in some areas for witch hunting. Virgin teenage girls (which these ladies undoubtedly profess to be) were the only way you could catch a unicorn. Also, virgin blood for sacrifices, etc. By this (largely historically inaccurate, but memetically robust) reasoning, virgin teenage girls would be very well suited for the job. They are close enough to the supernatural that they can affect it. Their conviction in their faith, and the conviction their marketers have in that faith, will prevent them from entertaining the notion that they could fail.

Also, why would you want someone psychologically sound to do this shit? No, you need someone who's REALLY GOOD at lying to themselves. Someone who can huff their own farts so hard they pass out without noticing the stench.
Ah virginity. Fair. But i suspect that has more to do with folklore than anything biblically based.
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Re: Teen Exorcists
« Reply #22 on: September 13, 2013, 04:03:36 am »
Not to be That Guy, but five bucks says the woman on the left isn't a virgin.

Nephew Twiddleton

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Re: Teen Exorcists
« Reply #23 on: September 13, 2013, 04:49:33 am »
Not to be That Guy, but five bucks says the woman on the left isn't a virgin.

Isn't she the one that's like 15? (see Anderson Cooper link)
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Re: Teen Exorcists
« Reply #24 on: September 13, 2013, 04:55:03 am »
I don't want to start this up, but losing one's virginity on or prior to 15 is not surprising to me.

It's awful, but not surprising.

Nephew Twiddleton

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Re: Teen Exorcists
« Reply #25 on: September 13, 2013, 04:56:47 am »
I don't want to start this up, but losing one's virginity on or prior to 15 is not surprising to me.

It's awful, but not surprising.

Christians do it better sooner.
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Nephew Twiddleton

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Re: Teen Exorcists
« Reply #26 on: September 13, 2013, 05:02:34 am »
Actually, isn't there a statistic that religious conservative teens are more likely to get abortions? Or is that BS?
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Richter

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Re: Teen Exorcists
« Reply #27 on: September 13, 2013, 01:05:36 pm »
I don't want to start this up, but losing one's virginity on or prior to 15 is not surprising to me.

It's awful, but not surprising.

Christians do it better sooner.

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Re: Teen Exorcists
« Reply #28 on: September 13, 2013, 01:12:30 pm »
I don't want to start this up, but losing one's virginity on or prior to 15 is not surprising to me.

It's awful, but not surprising.

Christians do it better sooner.

Saddlebacking?

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Junkenstein

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Re: Teen Exorcists
« Reply #29 on: September 13, 2013, 01:15:04 pm »
Not to be That Guy, but five bucks says the woman on the left isn't a virgin.

I'll take that bet. Care to give your reasoning?
Actually, isn't there a statistic that religious conservative teens are more likely to get abortions? Or is that BS?
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