Open Bar: ASSUMING DIRECT CONTROL

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

All religions go through that phase, I think.

Yeah, especially the ones in Guyana.

Or the ones in Japan that lead to people gassing subways or people from Middle Eastern countries blowing up. Those tend to be fringe though. They still pop up but they are all unorthodox.

And this guy is nondemoninational. Meaning he has no "higher authority" in his megachurch, which is more or less his personal regime.

And the Portland one just has videos of him during the service.

So, are you thinking he's just going through some growing pains, or maybe he's an insane control freak?

Yeah I'm gonna go with "megalomaniac control freak".

ALL the churches just play videos of him, they don't have real preachers. It is not permitted within the Church to criticize the Great Leader. WEIRD AS FUCK.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I particularly like "Discernment", the power for Mark Driscoll to SEE YOUR SIN.

God made me psychic so I can watch you in a brain porn.

He's a cold reader.  He doesn't believe his own shit.

That can be good or bad.

He pretty much projects "sociopath" to me.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

All religions go through that phase, I think.

Yeah, especially the ones in Guyana.

Or the ones in Japan that lead to people gassing subways or people from Middle Eastern countries blowing up. Those tend to be fringe though. They still pop up but they are all unorthodox.

And this guy is nondemoninational. Meaning he has no "higher authority" in his megachurch, which is more or less his personal regime.

And the Portland one just has videos of him during the service.

So, are you thinking he's just going through some growing pains, or maybe he's an insane control freak?

Yeah I'm gonna go with "megalomaniac control freak".

ALL the churches just play videos of him, they don't have real preachers. It is not permitted within the Church to criticize the Great Leader. WEIRD AS FUCK.

Classic cult symptoms.

List (I know you know this shit, but I reserve the right to be a pedantic assbasket).


   

The group is focused on a living leader to whom members seem to display excessively zealous, unquestioning commitment.

     
     The group is preoccupied with bringing in new members.

     
     The group is preoccupied with making money.

     
     Questioning, doubt, and dissent are discouraged or even punished.

     
     Mind-numbing techniques (such as meditation, chanting, speaking in tongues, denunciation sessions, debilitating work routines) are used to suppress doubts about the group and its leader(s).

     
     The leadership dictates sometimes in great detail how members should think, act, and feel (for example: members must get permission from leaders to date, change jobs, get married; leaders may prescribe what types of clothes to wear, where to live, how to discipline children, and so forth).

     
     The group is elitist, claiming a special, exalted status for itself, its leader(s), and members (for example: the leader is considered the Messiah or an avatar; the group and/or the leader has a special mission to save humanity).

     
     The group has a polarized us-versus-them mentality, which causes conflict with the wider society.

     
     The group's leader is not accountable to any authorities (as are, for example, military commanders and ministers, priests, monks, and rabbis of mainstream denominations).

     
     The group teaches or implies that its supposedly exalted ends justify means that members would have considered unethical before joining the group (for example: collecting money for bogus charities).

     
     The leadership induces guilt feelings in members in order to control them.

     
     Members' subservience to the group causes them to cut ties with family and friends, and to give up personal goals and activities that were of interest before joining the group.

     
     Members are expected to devote inordinate amounts of time to the group.

     
     Members are encouraged or required to live and/or socialize only with other group members.

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

I wish people didn't have to be sick to level up to that kind of loogie-hawking. Why can't it happen when we can ENJOY it? 

All religions go through that phase, I think.

Yeah, especially the ones in Guyana.

Or the ones in Japan that lead to people gassing subways or people from Middle Eastern countries blowing up. Those tend to be fringe though. They still pop up but they are all unorthodox.

And this guy is nondemoninational. Meaning he has no "higher authority" in his megachurch, which is more or less his personal regime.

And the Portland one just has videos of him during the service.

So, are you thinking he's just going through some growing pains, or maybe he's an insane control freak?

Yeah I'm gonna go with "megalomaniac control freak".

ALL the churches just play videos of him, they don't have real preachers. It is not permitted within the Church to criticize the Great Leader. WEIRD AS FUCK.

Oz The Great And Terrible. Now with more SOCIOPATHY^(TM)

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I wish people didn't have to be sick to level up to that kind of loogie-hawking. Why can't it happen when we can ENJOY it? 

I didn't say I didn't enjoy it.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

All religions go through that phase, I think.

Yeah, especially the ones in Guyana.

Or the ones in Japan that lead to people gassing subways or people from Middle Eastern countries blowing up. Those tend to be fringe though. They still pop up but they are all unorthodox.

And this guy is nondemoninational. Meaning he has no "higher authority" in his megachurch, which is more or less his personal regime.

And the Portland one just has videos of him during the service.

So, are you thinking he's just going through some growing pains, or maybe he's an insane control freak?

Yeah I'm gonna go with "megalomaniac control freak".

ALL the churches just play videos of him, they don't have real preachers. It is not permitted within the Church to criticize the Great Leader. WEIRD AS FUCK.

In a normal church, the pastor or priest, while interpreting scripture through a generally agreed upon lens, can still interpret. I've mentioned it before but when I went to go visit my Lutheran friends in the midwest (they went to grad school here and both became pastors themselves), we visited the husband's family in Indiana, and his father is a pastor. The part of scripture that was being sermonized was about false gods. I was, at the time, an Irish polytheist, a fact known to Ed's dad. Matter of fact, I was known as Kevin the Pagan. The sermon was about worshipping money, a false god. I appreciated the fact, and it was a sermon I was 100% in agreement with.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

All religions go through that phase, I think.

Yeah, especially the ones in Guyana.

Or the ones in Japan that lead to people gassing subways or people from Middle Eastern countries blowing up. Those tend to be fringe though. They still pop up but they are all unorthodox.

And this guy is nondemoninational. Meaning he has no "higher authority" in his megachurch, which is more or less his personal regime.

And the Portland one just has videos of him during the service.

So, are you thinking he's just going through some growing pains, or maybe he's an insane control freak?

Yeah I'm gonna go with "megalomaniac control freak".

ALL the churches just play videos of him, they don't have real preachers. It is not permitted within the Church to criticize the Great Leader. WEIRD AS FUCK.

Classic cult symptoms.

List (I know you know this shit, but I reserve the right to be a pedantic assbasket).


   

The group is focused on a living leader to whom members seem to display excessively zealous, unquestioning commitment.

     
     The group is preoccupied with bringing in new members.

     
     The group is preoccupied with making money.

     
     Questioning, doubt, and dissent are discouraged or even punished.

     
     Mind-numbing techniques (such as meditation, chanting, speaking in tongues, denunciation sessions, debilitating work routines) are used to suppress doubts about the group and its leader(s).

     
     The leadership dictates sometimes in great detail how members should think, act, and feel (for example: members must get permission from leaders to date, change jobs, get married; leaders may prescribe what types of clothes to wear, where to live, how to discipline children, and so forth).

     
     The group is elitist, claiming a special, exalted status for itself, its leader(s), and members (for example: the leader is considered the Messiah or an avatar; the group and/or the leader has a special mission to save humanity).

     
     The group has a polarized us-versus-them mentality, which causes conflict with the wider society.

     
     The group's leader is not accountable to any authorities (as are, for example, military commanders and ministers, priests, monks, and rabbis of mainstream denominations).

     
     The group teaches or implies that its supposedly exalted ends justify means that members would have considered unethical before joining the group (for example: collecting money for bogus charities).

     
     The leadership induces guilt feelings in members in order to control them.

     
     Members' subservience to the group causes them to cut ties with family and friends, and to give up personal goals and activities that were of interest before joining the group.

     
     Members are expected to devote inordinate amounts of time to the group.

     
     Members are encouraged or required to live and/or socialize only with other group members.

Man, that's going down the checklist like someone trying to troll PD.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I must stagger back to my sickbed now, to hack and cough and make really disgusting noises at random intervals.

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

 

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I must stagger back to my sickbed now, to hack and cough and make really disgusting noises at random intervals.

Sucks donkey balls. Get well.

[Salty]

Thank you, E.O.T., for showing me the wisdom of boilermakers.

FUCK YOU, E.O.T., for showing me the wisdom of boilermakers.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I must stagger back to my sickbed now, to hack and cough and make really disgusting noises at random intervals.

I envy your family. For perhaps the first time in YEARS, they have you in a vulnerable position.

Don't let that daughter of yours smother you with a pillow. You know she's waiting.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Thanks you, E.O.T., for showing me the wisdom of boilermakers.

FUCK YOU, E.O.T., for showing me the wisdom of boilermakers.

[Eater of Clowns]

Thanks you, E.O.T., for showing me the wisdom of boilermakers.

FUCK YOU, E.O.T., for showing me the wisdom of boilermakers.

Boilermakers are fucking magic. They improve BOTH shitty whiskey AND shitty beer AT THE SAME TIME.

[Eater of Clowns]

NOTHING IN HISTORY HAS WORKED THAT WELL.

EVERYONE THOUGHT PENICILLIN WAS GREAT AND WHAT DID WE GET FOR IT? MRSA!