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Hey Roger! I Took Down A Javelina...

Started by Roly Poly Oly-Garch, November 20, 2014, 02:59:24 PM

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Roly Poly Oly-Garch

November 20, 2014, 02:59:24 PM
Using only...

Back to the fecal matter in the pool

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#1
November 20, 2014, 03:19:29 PM
 :lulz:
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Doktor Howl

#2
November 21, 2014, 03:10:53 PM
 :lulz:
Molon Lube

Doktor Howl

#3
November 21, 2014, 03:11:24 PM
I am writing up this trip.  Horribly smashed Kenyan Love Burger will be included.
Molon Lube

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#4
November 21, 2014, 04:54:15 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on November 21, 2014, 03:11:24 PM
I am writing up this trip.  Horribly smashed Kenyan Love Burger will be included.

LOVE BULLETS

I vaguely recall that I was asking him very serious, very irritating questions about what, exactly, love bullets were made out of, and what effect they have on impact.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Reginald Ret

#5
November 21, 2014, 06:46:49 PM
I only just noticed you weren't talking about love darts.

I am disappoint.
Lord Byron: "Those who will not reason, are bigots, those who cannot, are fools, and those who dare not, are slaves."

Nigel saying the wisest words ever uttered: "It's just a suffix."

"The worst forum ever" "The most mediocre forum on the internet" "The dumbest forum on the internet" "The most retarded forum on the internet" "The lamest forum on the internet" "The coolest forum on the internet"

Doktor Howl

#6
November 21, 2014, 06:50:17 PM
Quote from: Reginald Ret (07/05/1983 - 06/11/2014) on November 21, 2014, 06:46:49 PM
I only just noticed you weren't talking about love darts.

I am disappoint.


You had to be there, man.
Molon Lube

Roly Poly Oly-Garch

#7
November 21, 2014, 07:31:42 PM
Quote from: Reginald Ret (07/05/1983 - 06/11/2014) on November 21, 2014, 06:46:49 PM
I only just noticed you weren't talking about love darts.

I am disappoint.

LOVE DARTS! This will be my new favorite thing for a week or five.
Back to the fecal matter in the pool

Trivial

#8
November 21, 2014, 10:42:18 PM
Sexy Octopus of the Next Noosphere Horde

There are more nipples in the world than people.

Reginald Ret

#9
November 21, 2014, 11:47:20 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on November 21, 2014, 06:50:17 PM
Quote from: Reginald Ret (07/05/1983 - 06/11/2014) on November 21, 2014, 06:46:49 PM
I only just noticed you weren't talking about love darts.

I am disappoint.


You had to be there, man.
That is usually the case, I'm sorry I missed it.
Though I have trouble believing it could beat the story I have in my head where Nigel's vulva start spinning and making a loud whirring sound. The Javelina is confused, not sure if he should run away. But before he can make up his mind, the harpoon-like darts start streaming out of the specialized organ surrounding Nigel's fifth most dangerous orifice. The first dart strikes the Javelina right in the nose, but before the hormones can do their job the rest of the love-minigun's barbed ammunition reduces the Javelina's facial skin to a sieve. These darts don't kill though, Nothing so merciful is happening here.

The Javelina's every cell has been soaked in Nigel's hormones, and he can already feel his body changing. While his body is getting weaker, his mind is getting clearer. While he is developing new forms of math in the few second it takes to complete the transformation the Javelina can finally deduce what his destiny is. It is not what he expected, We will never know what his last thoughts were because the last thing that poor Javelina did was look up to the stars, and let out a huge thunderous fart that seems like it could go on forever.

If you are wondering why that was the last thing it did, that is because Nigel, with a loving motherly smile, lit that fart on fire and the Javelina lifted off in the direction he was looking, screeching triumphantly. Quite soon he was no longer visible and after about 40 seconds a bright light lit up the night's sky.

If you wish to know what happened to the Javelina, you will have to ask Nigel.
Though she will probably say something cryptic.
I choose to believe the Javelina ascended to godhood, but others say it was merely meant as fireworks.
It is true that Nigel likes it when things go boom, but I wonder...
Lord Byron: "Those who will not reason, are bigots, those who cannot, are fools, and those who dare not, are slaves."

Nigel saying the wisest words ever uttered: "It's just a suffix."

"The worst forum ever" "The most mediocre forum on the internet" "The dumbest forum on the internet" "The most retarded forum on the internet" "The lamest forum on the internet" "The coolest forum on the internet"

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#10
November 22, 2014, 12:33:22 AM
 :lulz:
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#11
November 22, 2014, 12:36:18 AM
Today I recalled that part of my pressing line of questioning kept returning to my postulate (introduced initially by NLDM, I believe) that these "love bullets" sounded exactly like semen.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

LMNO

#12
November 22, 2014, 04:16:52 PM
Nothing will convince me that Reginald's post is not 100% the cold, hard truth.
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