Author Topic: uNFINISHED  (Read 1248 times)

Sung Low

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uNFINISHED
« on: March 10, 2015, 10:22:27 pm »
I am destruction on the dance floor.

It's not a choice. 

I am also subtle and sexy as all hell combined in a big fucking plastic carrier bag where you thought you'd bought all that shit that was on your list but you get home and find that the ONE thing you fucking NEEDED is missing but you can't be arsed to go back out and get that ONE THING so you sit at home and feel bad because your brain got distracted by those legs and whether you can actually be in a world that wants you to be less than yourself for who fuck knows why and then you find yourself alone and weeping and grinning at the fuck of it and you recognise that what you thought was so important is just another belief residing in your brain and it does not matter and it is no concern of theirs and

the DANCE FLOOR is a fucking MASSACRE

and the people can do nothing else but stare at the beauty and horror as the walls turn red and the bodies fall wet and sickened with last breaths thought on how and why and on the teeth that shine through the gore grinding like the eternal machine because it's never enough and the breath is ragged and sharp rending flesh from the air vicious there is no mercy yet still they offer prayers and sacrifices to a mad god as the hope is plucked from their eyes and the teeth keep grinding their bloodied hearts are held up in front of them









and I slump on the floor, looking at my hands, wondering if the blood is theirs or mine
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Mesozoic Mister Nigel

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Re: uNFINISHED
« Reply #1 on: March 10, 2015, 11:13:53 pm »
That was pretty good, new guy. Not bad at all.
Im guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk, Charles Wick said. It was very complicated.


LMNO

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Re: uNFINISHED
« Reply #2 on: March 11, 2015, 02:59:55 am »





SATURDAY NIGHT.

The Wizard Joseph

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Re: uNFINISHED
« Reply #3 on: March 11, 2015, 06:43:00 am »
I liked that a lot. You've got a knack for imagery and it flowed.. like blood down the wall.
You can't get out backward.  You have to go forward to go back.. better press on! - Willie Wonka, PBUH

Life can be seen as a game with no reset button, no extra lives, and if the power goes out there is no restarting.  If that's all you see life as you are not long for this world, and never will get it.

"Ayn Rand never swung a hammer in her life and had serious dominance issues" - The Fountainhead

"World domination is such an ugly phrase. I prefer to call it world optimisation."
 - Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality :lulz:

Sung Low

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Re: uNFINISHED
« Reply #4 on: March 11, 2015, 08:24:05 pm »
Nice!

Thanks for the positive feedback people. It's good to know it didn't suck. Hopefully this is the start of my writing flowing more easily.


Also, I'm going to start kicking more clubs in the junk. Just for the yucks.
Those fuckers are unprepared for this shit  :lol:

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Sung Low

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Re: uNFINISHED
« Reply #5 on: March 12, 2015, 06:33:56 pm »
ach, the full stop is significant
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