Author Topic: Sleeping Pills  (Read 1181 times)

Freeky

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Sleeping Pills
« on: April 07, 2016, 08:09:36 am »
Tense.  Always tense. 

Don't say anything, because it might upset someone, it might offend someone, it might make people you respect view you with scorn, it might hurt someone else. 

Don't explain, because it doesn't matter anyway, it won't be listened to, it's just an excuse, it'll be seen to be a lie, it'll be taken out of context, it'll open unhealed wounds, it'll make things harder, it wasn't asked for.

Don't make eye contact, because they'll think you like them, think you hate them, think you're challenging them, think you want to fight, think you want to talk, think you have the energy to deal.

Don't react, because it'll start a fight, give them power, appear you were eavesdropping, be offensive, start a conversation, be shameful, make you look strange.

Don't speak, because nobody cares, nobody asked, it's you ignoring them, you aren't an expert, you don't have the energy, don't have the will, don't feel welcome anyway.

Don't... do anything rash, because you promised, you don't want to, you can't be doing that shit, people will see.

Tense.  Ever-present and the normal state, can't even tell anymore.  All the "don'ts" are fights against the DOs.  It's so very uncomfortable to do, when the default is don't, and it is usually more trouble than it's worth, it seems.  Stressful.

But the sleeping pills make it go away.  Sometimes.  Sometimes if you take enough, you find peace, emptiness, relaxation, a lack of DON'T because there is no DO.  No more barely registered thoughts of broken glass and broken skin, suppressed bitterness or anger or violence or terror or sadness, no more allergy symptoms either.  But that's just a bonus, really.  Side effect of can't breathe is a small price to pay to not guard against yourself, to not even have to.

Don't do it too often, though.  You know why.
If someone does the Fine, youre right, Im clearly a terrible person, Im Satan, Im the worst person alive, I should just die thing in response to criticism of their harmful behavior, they are trying to manipulate people and flip the situation around so that they look like a victim.

As a neuroscientist I have to disagree with the perception that anyone is doing mathematical modeling of cognitive intelligence, yet; intelligence as an economist defines it, yes, but economists are worlds away from actual cognition.


Although it is outside the purview of this organization to offer personal advice, we can say -- without assuming any liability -- that previous experience indicates (and recent market studies corroborate) that given the present condition of the marketplace, continuing with your present course of action is likely to result in substantial in

LuciferX

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Re: Sleeping Pills
« Reply #1 on: April 07, 2016, 08:37:41 am »
I like it
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Pope Pelvis Flirtini

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Re: Sleeping Pills
« Reply #2 on: November 25, 2016, 05:17:16 am »
For what it's worth: I happen to think this is a powerful piece.
"Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you." - Friedrich Nietzsche

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Re: Sleeping Pills
« Reply #3 on: November 25, 2016, 02:43:59 pm »
This is good work, Freeky.
Im guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk, Charles Wick said. It was very complicated.


Freeky

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Re: Sleeping Pills
« Reply #4 on: November 25, 2016, 04:51:43 pm »
If someone does the Fine, youre right, Im clearly a terrible person, Im Satan, Im the worst person alive, I should just die thing in response to criticism of their harmful behavior, they are trying to manipulate people and flip the situation around so that they look like a victim.

As a neuroscientist I have to disagree with the perception that anyone is doing mathematical modeling of cognitive intelligence, yet; intelligence as an economist defines it, yes, but economists are worlds away from actual cognition.


Although it is outside the purview of this organization to offer personal advice, we can say -- without assuming any liability -- that previous experience indicates (and recent market studies corroborate) that given the present condition of the marketplace, continuing with your present course of action is likely to result in substantial in

Freeky

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Re: Sleeping Pills
« Reply #5 on: November 25, 2016, 04:52:06 pm »
If someone does the Fine, youre right, Im clearly a terrible person, Im Satan, Im the worst person alive, I should just die thing in response to criticism of their harmful behavior, they are trying to manipulate people and flip the situation around so that they look like a victim.

As a neuroscientist I have to disagree with the perception that anyone is doing mathematical modeling of cognitive intelligence, yet; intelligence as an economist defines it, yes, but economists are worlds away from actual cognition.


Although it is outside the purview of this organization to offer personal advice, we can say -- without assuming any liability -- that previous experience indicates (and recent market studies corroborate) that given the present condition of the marketplace, continuing with your present course of action is likely to result in substantial in

trippinprincezz13

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Re: Sleeping Pills
« Reply #6 on: November 28, 2016, 05:54:56 pm »
Really good piece, Freeky. Very relatable.
There's no sun shine coming through her ass, if you are sure of your penis.

Paranoia is a disease unto itself, and may I add, the person standing next to you, may not be who they appear to be, so take precaution.

If there is no order in your sexual life it may be difficult to stay with a whole skin.

NeonWytch

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Re: Sleeping Pills
« Reply #7 on: December 03, 2016, 08:23:51 pm »
I really like it.

When I was younger I used to steal ambien from a friend of mine. They only rarely took it and had a pretty irresponsibly flexible prescription, so they never noticed.

It's not like thc or pcp,
You don't get high
like cnn or fox or nbc
You escape.
Not to another world, another frame of thought, like with LSD.
Like with ideology.
If we're in a prison, and drugs let us break and put up walls for a little bit,
hypnotics are like filling the whole cell in cement and rock.
until you're displaced from the whole thing
and you're stuck on top of the prison complex
and all you see is an infinite plane of iron and brick
and it's sunny
and the iron is hot on your feet
and the sun is blinding you
and the air is thick and you're not on the roof
you're in the sand
you're in the cement
and the heat makes you sleepy
and you nod off in the sunlight and breeze and the sediment and the rock and the hot metal

and wake back up in your room with vomit on your shirt and an awful headache.
A wise man once said "What was that? I couldn't hear you."

Freeky

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Re: Sleeping Pills
« Reply #8 on: December 05, 2016, 08:01:55 pm »
Fuck yeah.
If someone does the Fine, youre right, Im clearly a terrible person, Im Satan, Im the worst person alive, I should just die thing in response to criticism of their harmful behavior, they are trying to manipulate people and flip the situation around so that they look like a victim.

As a neuroscientist I have to disagree with the perception that anyone is doing mathematical modeling of cognitive intelligence, yet; intelligence as an economist defines it, yes, but economists are worlds away from actual cognition.


Although it is outside the purview of this organization to offer personal advice, we can say -- without assuming any liability -- that previous experience indicates (and recent market studies corroborate) that given the present condition of the marketplace, continuing with your present course of action is likely to result in substantial in