Author Topic: A Parable (just for funsies)  (Read 1647 times)

LMNO

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Re: A Parable (just for funsies)
« Reply #15 on: March 24, 2019, 07:42:22 pm »
Well, I've just figured out who ILB is.



Sir, your hardcore is commendable, but as you say so yourself, punk is not a sound, it's a verb.  It has no genre.  Coltrane was a punk.  Beethoven was a punk.  Hell, Debussy was a punk. 

Fuck, I'll say it.  JOHN-FUCKING-DENVER was a punk.



Anyway, in response to the OP, the commercializers didn't kill punk.  Punk got bored of their bullshit and left.  Punk hung around Electroclash for a while, then peeked in to what Hip Hop was doing, hi-fived queerpop on the way to the drag bar, and was last seen palling around with Kamasi Washington.

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Re: A Parable (just for funsies)
« Reply #16 on: March 25, 2019, 12:34:40 am »
Well, I've just figured out who ILB is.



Sir, your hardcore is commendable, but as you say so yourself, punk is not a sound, it's a verb.  It has no genre.  Coltrane was a punk.  Beethoven was a punk.  Hell, Debussy was a punk. 

Fuck, I'll say it.  JOHN-FUCKING-DENVER was a punk.



Anyway, in response to the OP, the commercializers didn't kill punk.  Punk got bored of their bullshit and left.  Punk hung around Electroclash for a while, then peeked in to what Hip Hop was doing, hi-fived queerpop on the way to the drag bar, and was last seen palling around with Kamasi Washington.

I actually tell people all the time that Beethoven was the first punker.
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Re: A Parable (just for funsies)
« Reply #17 on: March 25, 2019, 01:33:38 am »
Beethoven was the first punker.
He was the first one to sell out.

The actual mother of punk was this cavewoman named roughly something like Zorgette on our alphabet. She was so enthusiastic about banging rocks together that her tribe got really aggravated and accidentally invented mosh pit.
I get trauma from stuff most don't even notice.

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Re: A Parable (just for funsies)
« Reply #18 on: March 25, 2019, 04:58:58 am »
Well, I've just figured out who ILB is.



Sir, your hardcore is commendable, but as you say so yourself, punk is not a sound, it's a verb.  It has no genre.  Coltrane was a punk.  Beethoven was a punk.  Hell, Debussy was a punk. 

Fuck, I'll say it.  JOHN-FUCKING-DENVER was a punk.



Anyway, in response to the OP, the commercializers didn't kill punk.  Punk got bored of their bullshit and left.  Punk hung around Electroclash for a while, then peeked in to what Hip Hop was doing, hi-fived queerpop on the way to the drag bar, and was last seen palling around with Kamasi Washington.

HAH!  THIS is the FUCKING GUY that told me Burn Down the Mission wasn't punk, when it is CLEARLY PUNK AS FUCK.

"The man leaned on me so I killed him and his lackeys and burned their bodies in their church, and I don't know what I'm gonna do when the law shows up but it ain't gonna be pretty."


I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, shattered underpance lies,
With blown elastic, and exploded back,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed:
And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is Doktor Howl, Spag of Spags:
Look on my ass, ye Mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.

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Re: A Parable (just for funsies)
« Reply #19 on: March 25, 2019, 05:00:49 am »
For shame, LMNO.

LMNO

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Re: A Parable (just for funsies)
« Reply #20 on: March 25, 2019, 11:55:36 am »
:asshat:

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Re: A Parable (just for funsies)
« Reply #21 on: March 25, 2019, 04:45:24 pm »
:asshat:

Beer turns my memory into Memorex.

I never forget a fucking THING that gets said after beer #3.  Useful in this case, but more often gives me the random CRINGE UNTIL YOU PULL YOUR PANTS UP YOUR ASS things I said when I was white girl drunk like 15 years ago.
I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, shattered underpance lies,
With blown elastic, and exploded back,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed:
And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is Doktor Howl, Spag of Spags:
Look on my ass, ye Mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.

Doktor Howl

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Re: A Parable (just for funsies)
« Reply #22 on: March 25, 2019, 04:48:24 pm »

Anyway, in response to the OP, the commercializers didn't kill punk.  Punk got bored of their bullshit and left.  Punk hung around Electroclash for a while, then peeked in to what Hip Hop was doing, hi-fived queerpop on the way to the drag bar, and was last seen palling around with Kamasi Washington.

AND ANOTHER THING:

Punk killed acid rock.  Hair metal ate punk.  Grunge came for the crimes of hair metal.  Indie shanked grunge...AND ALL THIS TIME, pop was having unsafe sex down in the MBTA station and their numbers grew.

Now there is no punk.  There is no grunge.  There sure as fuck isn't any hair metal.

There is only Taylor Swift, and all shall love her and despair.
I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, shattered underpance lies,
With blown elastic, and exploded back,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed:
And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is Doktor Howl, Spag of Spags:
Look on my ass, ye Mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.

LMNO

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Re: A Parable (just for funsies)
« Reply #23 on: March 25, 2019, 04:50:35 pm »
Forget about Taylor Swift.

It's all about Lizzo and Robyn.

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Re: A Parable (just for funsies)
« Reply #24 on: March 25, 2019, 04:57:16 pm »
Forget about Taylor Swift.

It's all about Lizzo and Robyn.

I am okay with all of this.  I warned you fuckers.  I did.  You saw me.  I told you DUCK NOW but you just stood there making Studio 54 jokes.  NOW LOOK AT YOU!  YOU LOOK LIKE SHIT.  And on top of your unwholesome new habits, THIS HAPPENED:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CcNo07Xp8aQ

And I love it.  This is the FUTURE.  It's what WE BUILT when we were FUCKED UP ON DRUGS, and were TOO COOL to listen to what TOM JONES WAS TRYING TO TELL US.

And in the smoking ruins, Johnny Rotten is a sad clown, explaining that Trump is punk af and the kids should stop whinging.

No shit.  He said that.  Out loud.

And nobody will KILL ME.
I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, shattered underpance lies,
With blown elastic, and exploded back,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed:
And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is Doktor Howl, Spag of Spags:
Look on my ass, ye Mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.

Doktor Howl

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Re: A Parable (just for funsies)
« Reply #25 on: March 25, 2019, 05:39:18 pm »
I've been going through Robyn's discography and I love her like I love earthquakes and inconvenient volcanoes.
I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, shattered underpance lies,
With blown elastic, and exploded back,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed:
And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is Doktor Howl, Spag of Spags:
Look on my ass, ye Mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.

LMNO

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Re: A Parable (just for funsies)
« Reply #26 on: March 25, 2019, 05:40:30 pm »
Yup, that's about right.

Have you encountered "Don't Fucking Tell Me What To Do" yet?

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Re: A Parable (just for funsies)
« Reply #27 on: March 25, 2019, 05:41:52 pm »
T-Swift is my spirit animal.
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Doktor Howl

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Re: A Parable (just for funsies)
« Reply #28 on: March 25, 2019, 05:52:52 pm »
Yup, that's about right.

Have you encountered "Don't Fucking Tell Me What To Do" yet?

No.

Off on a mission!
I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, shattered underpance lies,
With blown elastic, and exploded back,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed:
And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is Doktor Howl, Spag of Spags:
Look on my ass, ye Mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.

Doktor Howl

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Re: A Parable (just for funsies)
« Reply #29 on: March 25, 2019, 05:57:19 pm »
Meh.  Dancing on my own is a work of genius.

This other one is a gimmick.
I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, shattered underpance lies,
With blown elastic, and exploded back,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed:
And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is Doktor Howl, Spag of Spags:
Look on my ass, ye Mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.