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This forum needs some more true Christian sermons

Started by Jack Chick, April 05, 2005, 06:30:01 PM

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Irreverend Hugh, KSC

#30
April 06, 2005, 10:06:53 AM
Quote from: Great Teacher Largo
Quote from: Irreverend Hugh, KSCHeretic!

Why dost thou walk in the spirit of Satan?

Hast not thou the Lord?

Why must thee stepst?

Dude, are we on the same page, here, 'cause when I use my Apocalypse Brethern Translation from the Original Eldar God, all I get for that psalm is:

IA!  IA!  IA!  IA SAKKAKTH!  IAK SAKKAKH!  IA SHA XUL!
IA!  IA!  IA UTUKKU XUL!
IA!  IA ZIXUL!  IA ZIXUL!
IA KINGU!  IA AZBUL!  IA AZABUA!  IA XAZTUR!  IA HUBBUR!
IA!  IA!  IA!
BAXABAXAXAXAXABAXAXAXAXA!
KAKHTAKHTAMON IAS!

Why must you test the Lord with your heathen devil Spanish, huh?

Have you even seen what happens when a person gets turned into a pillar of salt?
"Time for the tin-foil hats, girls and boys!"

Great Teacher Largo

#31
April 06, 2005, 10:08:10 AM
Quote from: Irreverend Hugh, KSC
Quote from: Great Teacher Largo
Quote from: Irreverend Hugh, KSCHeretic!

Why dost thou walk in the spirit of Satan?

Hast not thou the Lord?

Why must thee stepst?

Dude, are we on the same page, here, 'cause when I use my Apocalypse Brethern Translation from the Original Eldar God, all I get for that psalm is:

IA!  IA!  IA!  IA SAKKAKTH!  IAK SAKKAKH!  IA SHA XUL!
IA!  IA!  IA UTUKKU XUL!
IA!  IA ZIXUL!  IA ZIXUL!
IA KINGU!  IA AZBUL!  IA AZABUA!  IA XAZTUR!  IA HUBBUR!
IA!  IA!  IA!
BAXABAXAXAXAXABAXAXAXAXA!
KAKHTAKHTAMON IAS!

Why must you test the Lord with your heathen devil Spanish, huh?

Have you even seen what happens when a person gets turned into a pillar of salt?

That's when Richard Gere shows up with his 'Little Friends' who always need a salt lick.
"Any sufficiently tentacled spheroid is indistinguishable from the Great Cthulhu." -- Watashi

"Never attribute to Cthulhu what can adequately be explained by Dagon." -- Miskatonic Razor

"Everything but Sterility can be inherited.  None of your direct ancestors died childless." -- Red Queen

Note to filmmakers of the future: bad dialog leads to anger, bad directing leads to hatred, shallow action sequences lead to suffering. Farming out a movie to a corporation of computer animators is a path to the dark side of filmmaking.

High Inquisitor of the LMNO Society of Discordians (LSD)

It is dark.  You are likely to be eaten by a Grue.

This Poster is Owned and Operated by the Frobozz Magic Co., Ltd.

Irreverend Hugh, KSC

#32
April 06, 2005, 10:47:36 AM
WHY DOST THOU HATE THE LORD THY GOD?
"Time for the tin-foil hats, girls and boys!"

Great Teacher Largo

#33
April 06, 2005, 10:56:51 AM
Quote from: Irreverend Hugh, KSCWHY DOST THOU HATE THE LORD THY GOD?

/me points Hugh to a Thread in Apple Talk called, "Just to Let you Know."

I quote:

I hold it against Fate and the Gods I was not born a woman.
"Any sufficiently tentacled spheroid is indistinguishable from the Great Cthulhu." -- Watashi

"Never attribute to Cthulhu what can adequately be explained by Dagon." -- Miskatonic Razor

"Everything but Sterility can be inherited.  None of your direct ancestors died childless." -- Red Queen

Note to filmmakers of the future: bad dialog leads to anger, bad directing leads to hatred, shallow action sequences lead to suffering. Farming out a movie to a corporation of computer animators is a path to the dark side of filmmaking.

High Inquisitor of the LMNO Society of Discordians (LSD)

It is dark.  You are likely to be eaten by a Grue.

This Poster is Owned and Operated by the Frobozz Magic Co., Ltd.

Irreverend Hugh, KSC

#34
April 06, 2005, 11:24:28 AM
Quote from: Great Teacher Largo
Quote from: Irreverend Hugh, KSCWHY DOST THOU HATE THE LORD THY GOD?

/me points Hugh to a Thread in Apple Talk called, "Just to Let you Know."

I quote:

I hold it against Fate and the Gods I was not born a woman.

REPENT SINNER AND PERHAPS THE LORD WILL ALLOW YOU SOME TEA IN HELL!
"Time for the tin-foil hats, girls and boys!"

Great Teacher Largo

#35
April 06, 2005, 11:33:54 AM
Quote from: Irreverend Hugh, KSC
Quote from: Great Teacher Largo
Quote from: Irreverend Hugh, KSCWHY DOST THOU HATE THE LORD THY GOD?

/me points Hugh to a Thread in Apple Talk called, "Just to Let you Know."

I quote:

I hold it against Fate and the Gods I was not born a woman.

REPENT SINNER AND PERHAPS THE LORD WILL ALLOW YOU SOME TEA IN HELL!

I'll only buy it if there's Tea AND Cake in Hell.
"Any sufficiently tentacled spheroid is indistinguishable from the Great Cthulhu." -- Watashi

"Never attribute to Cthulhu what can adequately be explained by Dagon." -- Miskatonic Razor

"Everything but Sterility can be inherited.  None of your direct ancestors died childless." -- Red Queen

Note to filmmakers of the future: bad dialog leads to anger, bad directing leads to hatred, shallow action sequences lead to suffering. Farming out a movie to a corporation of computer animators is a path to the dark side of filmmaking.

High Inquisitor of the LMNO Society of Discordians (LSD)

It is dark.  You are likely to be eaten by a Grue.

This Poster is Owned and Operated by the Frobozz Magic Co., Ltd.

Irreverend Hugh, KSC

#36
April 06, 2005, 12:19:59 PM
Yeah. You say that now sinner!

But wait until your tongue is wrent from your mouth and your teeth are fed to you one by one.
"Time for the tin-foil hats, girls and boys!"

B_M_W

#37
April 06, 2005, 06:46:23 PM
Um, are you trying to channel Jack or something? Because its not really funny, just disturbing....or something.
One by one, we break the sheep from their Iron Bar Prisons and expand their imaginations, make them think for themselves. In turn, they break more from their prisons. Eventually, critical mass is reached. Our key word: Resolve. Evangelize with compassion and determination. And realize that there will be few in the beginning. We are hand picking our successors. They are the future of Discordianism. Let us guide our future with intelligence.

     --Reverse Brainwashing: A Guide http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=9801.0

6.5 billion Buddhas walking around.

99.xxxxxxx% forgot they are Buddha.

Great Teacher Largo

#38
April 06, 2005, 07:47:44 PM
I concur with the person who likes Fred's art.
"Any sufficiently tentacled spheroid is indistinguishable from the Great Cthulhu." -- Watashi

"Never attribute to Cthulhu what can adequately be explained by Dagon." -- Miskatonic Razor

"Everything but Sterility can be inherited.  None of your direct ancestors died childless." -- Red Queen

Note to filmmakers of the future: bad dialog leads to anger, bad directing leads to hatred, shallow action sequences lead to suffering. Farming out a movie to a corporation of computer animators is a path to the dark side of filmmaking.

High Inquisitor of the LMNO Society of Discordians (LSD)

It is dark.  You are likely to be eaten by a Grue.

This Poster is Owned and Operated by the Frobozz Magic Co., Ltd.

Chaplin_Sinatra_Fonzarell

#39
April 06, 2005, 10:34:33 PM
I regreat making this topic. Whenever Christianity is discussed, things get really square.
Chaplin Sinatra Fonzarelli, G.G.L.F., C.L.F., L.F.L.F., R.M.S.T.A., R.P.C.V., N.C.c., T.R.R.R., W.I.T.C.H., W.P.P., V.P.D.F.Y.S., S.C.U.M., I.G.R.S.A.F.D.S.K.S.K.J.J.J.S.Y.Y.D.F.D.K.D.S.F.K.S.D.K.J.L.K.F.G.K.S.D.G.G.J.R.J.S.T.S and other various divisions of the Maude Senger cabal of the Pantheo-Anametamystikhood of Eris Esoteric, and President for Life of the Holy Empire of Ayatollah Discordiolla

img]http://www.dontyouwantmebaby.com/fark/bond_077_hasselhoff_animate.gif[/img]

Irreverend Hugh, KSC

#40
April 08, 2005, 07:10:09 AM
Quote from: Chaplin_Sinatra_FonzarellI regreat making this topic. Whenever Christianity is discussed, things get really square.

WHY DOST THOU DETEST JEEVUS?
"Time for the tin-foil hats, girls and boys!"

Great Teacher Largo

#41
April 08, 2005, 09:22:49 AM
Quote from: Irreverend Hugh, KSC
Quote from: Chaplin_Sinatra_FonzarellI regreat making this topic. Whenever Christianity is discussed, things get really square.

WHY DOST THOU DETEST JEEVUS?

Pies Iesv Domine
Dona Aest Reqviem.
"Any sufficiently tentacled spheroid is indistinguishable from the Great Cthulhu." -- Watashi

"Never attribute to Cthulhu what can adequately be explained by Dagon." -- Miskatonic Razor

"Everything but Sterility can be inherited.  None of your direct ancestors died childless." -- Red Queen

Note to filmmakers of the future: bad dialog leads to anger, bad directing leads to hatred, shallow action sequences lead to suffering. Farming out a movie to a corporation of computer animators is a path to the dark side of filmmaking.

High Inquisitor of the LMNO Society of Discordians (LSD)

It is dark.  You are likely to be eaten by a Grue.

This Poster is Owned and Operated by the Frobozz Magic Co., Ltd.

B_M_W

#42
April 09, 2005, 12:30:21 AM
Hey freakoid von Klist or whatever your name is, you don't know jack about Latin.

Its actually:

Pie Jesu Domine

Donna Aeis Requiem

Sepiternam (optional)

Duh.

8)
One by one, we break the sheep from their Iron Bar Prisons and expand their imaginations, make them think for themselves. In turn, they break more from their prisons. Eventually, critical mass is reached. Our key word: Resolve. Evangelize with compassion and determination. And realize that there will be few in the beginning. We are hand picking our successors. They are the future of Discordianism. Let us guide our future with intelligence.

     --Reverse Brainwashing: A Guide http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=9801.0

6.5 billion Buddhas walking around.

99.xxxxxxx% forgot they are Buddha.

Great Teacher Largo

#43
April 09, 2005, 12:38:29 AM
Quote from: Buddhist_Monk_WannabeHey freakoid von Klist or whatever your name is, you don't know jack about Latin.

Its actually:

Pie Jesu Domine

Donna Aeis Requiem

Sepiternam (optional)

Duh.

8)

I latin there is no J, only an I.  And I'm not quoting the Dies Irae, the Dark-Age Gregorian Chant, I'm quoting from the movie Monty Python and the Holy Grail, of which the special features DVD gives the above lyrics.
"Any sufficiently tentacled spheroid is indistinguishable from the Great Cthulhu." -- Watashi

"Never attribute to Cthulhu what can adequately be explained by Dagon." -- Miskatonic Razor

"Everything but Sterility can be inherited.  None of your direct ancestors died childless." -- Red Queen

Note to filmmakers of the future: bad dialog leads to anger, bad directing leads to hatred, shallow action sequences lead to suffering. Farming out a movie to a corporation of computer animators is a path to the dark side of filmmaking.

High Inquisitor of the LMNO Society of Discordians (LSD)

It is dark.  You are likely to be eaten by a Grue.

This Poster is Owned and Operated by the Frobozz Magic Co., Ltd.

Butthead

#44
April 09, 2005, 12:49:09 AM
Quote from: Great Teacher Largo
Quote from: Buddhist_Monk_WannabeHey freakoid von Klist or whatever your name is, you don't know jack about Latin.

Its actually:

Pie Jesu Domine

Donna Aeis Requiem

Sepiternam (optional)

Duh.

8)

I latin there is no J, only an I.  And I'm not quoting the Dies Irae, the Dark-Age Gregorian Chant, I'm quoting from the movie Monty Python and the Holy Grail, of which the special features DVD gives the above lyrics.

Uhhhhh...you suck.
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