Reflections on the Porcelain throne #2

[Antechinus sapiens]

"Have you checked for termites lately?" - A van parked outside a primary school this morning. Said van was rocking slightly.
"Flax fibre is soft, lustrous and flexible. It is stronger than cotton fibre but less elastic. The best grades are used for linen fabrics such as damasks, lace and sheeting." - An anonymous contributer to Wikipedia.
"GP: Is there an essential meaning behind POEE?
M2: There is a Zen Story about a student who asked a Master to explain the meaning of
Buddhism. The Master,Äôs reply was ,ÄúThree pounds of flax.,Äù
GP: Is that your answer to my question?
M2: No, of course not. That is just illustrative. The answer to your question is FIVE
TONS OF FLAX!" - The Principia Discordia

I was cogitating once again on the porcelain throne, metaphorically contemplating my navel when another thought came to me. What may be (or may not be) the true meaning of the flax. The word for the flax plant in latin is linum. From this we get "linseed oil" - oil from the flax seeds. From linseed oil we get... LINOLEUM!
There, my friends, is the crux of the matter. The true meaning of discordianism is LINOLEUM.
"LINOLEUM?" You ask?
Yes, LINOLEUM. Lots and lots of linoleum.

Or, five tons of flax would be used to construct a giant table-cloth made of Linen. A tablecloth of this magnitude could only be used for one thing - for a giant table during a piss-up the likes of which humanity has never seen. Think about it - people having fun, getting drunk, passing out, waking up and then getting drunk and finally passing out again. All the while having fun.

Buddhism is three pounds of flax - enough to make a few doily or perhaps a small tablecloth. To have a small, tiny bit of fun. This mid-way point between fun and seriousness embodies Buddhism. Discordianism? Not so., The gigantinormous tablecloth and party of comparable magnitude would be the ultimate jake against the greyfaces.
Think of it:
A party is one of the things that upsets the greyfaces most of all. Mainly because they're never invited. Parties symbolise everything greyfaces are against.

And I've lost my train of thought. It's been derailed, crashing off a bridge and plowing into a hillside in a shower of flames and plumes of smoke.

[Buddha's Ghost Penis]

WE GIVES THIS FIVE WEEEOOOOS!

[hooplala]

I like.