Rant 129: Fuck Iraq!

[Irreverend Hugh, KSC]

Note: Rants 126 and 127 are in the shop being worked on since they have proven to be even more full of shit than any of the others, even more full of it than Fox News.

Rant 129
Fuck Iraq!

"The response has been unacceptable."
-GW Bush (talking about New Orleans relief efforts; one of the only true things the man has ever said.)

"A simple definition of colonization is that it takes people's stories away, and assigns them supportive roles in stories that empower others at their expense. When you are taxed to support a government that uses you as a means to serve the ends of others, you are - ironically - in a state of taxation without representation. That's where this country started, and it's where we are now."
-Rev. Davidson Loehr (from "Living Under Fascism")

Can you tell me why in any god's name should I give two shits about Iraq and Bush's stupid campaign to punish those people for the sins of their former leader? It is absurd to think about a war that is costing a billion dollars a day to establish some sort of "democracy" (euphemism alert) for a people that say they want freedom and yet keep doing a better job of killing each other than of actually being free? Why be concerned about some false campaign to implant democracy in some far off country when it's being torn to shreds here at home? Is the USA now going to play the role of "global overthrower" which tells people exactly what to do and how to do it in order to be free? It sounds like it. This "world power" thing has definitely gotten into the heads of that (to use Hunter Thompson's phrase) "generation of swine" that now run the US government and control its economy.

Granted. I never thought the damned USA should have invaded Iraq in the first place. But if the US is going to go on about its global fight for freedom, why the fuck aren't they slapping China's big dumb ass out of Tibet? Why aren't they helping Argentina's democratic social revolution against the banks and the wealthy who are intent upon regaining control there? Why aren't they slapping the Sudanese Racists who are killing black Africans by the thousands in Darfur? Well, we know the answer to that one anyway. (The US cares little about Africans, unless they start blowing up shit.) Why the fuck did the US bomb and invade Afghanistan when all of the terrorists allegedly responsible for nine eleven were from Saudi Arabia? You would think that the USA would at least do something about one of the above cases, if not just to look a little bit more legitimate. I guess they don't even care about looking legit anymore and this is not a good sign, because it means that they don't have to care. They have the power already. Why need they care how they are perceived?

Fuck Iraq! The costs of a couple of months of that stupid adventure would probably be more than enough to restore and repair New Orleans and the rest of the South that got slammed by Katrina and her children. Like hell we need to have soldiers in Iraq. For what? To protect Americans from terrorists? When was the last time Iraqi terrorists threatened the US? Where are the supposed weapons of mass destruction? Since when did Iraqis come here and start killing Americans? It's news to me. All I see are thousands of lives and billions of dollars being poured into the operation for no apparent reason except that the president can feel good about himself when he wraps himself up in the flag every night before bed.  

While you were asleep at the wheel of your part in the tattered remains of the American Democracy, the fascists and the Christian Dominionists have taken control of almost every institution that has any great influence on society. Not only do they own the wheel of your life, but they own the car, the highway, and they are trying to get control of your spill proof coffee mug. (Is that what you want?) What are you going to do about that? Go out on the streets and protest against the war in Iraq? Get angry with Bush because of the stupid war? But what would you do? What cause would you have to follow if the soldiers were pulled out of Iraq and the war was ended? Would you then go home and sleep easier, knowing that the fascists who run things have got it all figured out for you?

While you were asleep pretending that the internet was freedom and that you could hide from Al-Qaeda (whatever the hell that really is), your future prospects have been decided for you via agreements you will never get to hear about. Your new religion will be one of Evangelical Christianity and you will find a flag to fly in front of your home. You will marry a docile woman who will stay inside the home at all times, unless chaperoned. (And if she becomes un-dociled, they will have nice "summer" camps you can send her to.) You will learn the doctrine of Christ's Repudiation of this world as well as being taught why God really does hate gays and lesbians, Pagans and Mexicans. You will work 70 or 80 hours a week to pay your "till death" endless mortgage and/or rent and you will have to wait another 5 to 6 hours in line for your rations of food. At least you won't have to worry about your children, for once the Theocracy approves of your reproductive rights, they will only too happily take your spawn and bring them out to Utah, or Oregon for proper Christian Values Training. You will learn to praise Jesus and love your new righteous life, even if one of your neighbors ends up missing every other week or so.

But one day, they will come for you two. They'll have pics of some black clad bunch of anarchists. They will claim you were one of them. (Unlikely since they staged the whole photograph.) They will take you to another "summer" camp and you will wonder why they are called summer camps after you have been there for a few years watching the brightest, the colorful, and the different start to die off under malnutrition and forced labor. At that point you will be thankful that all you got was the ten commandments branded on your ass. And it will be okay, so long as they're waving the red white and blue.

Is this what you want? Damn. We thought we knew what you wanted, but perhaps we were wrong. If the above is what you want, then please stand still and make our job a little easier. Okay?

Never mind. The fascists are winning. They are taking control all over the world, and all you are doing is bitching and moaning about the way Discordians are. All you are doing is spending your time on the internet pretending to have discourse with people you aren't even sure really exist. All you are doing is getting angry with other people online because they didn't give you the attention and the handshake you felt you were entitled to. And each moment you have wasted going around and saying "WAHWAHWAH!" and moaning about your perceived mistreatment online, the fuckers take just a little bit more of your freewill away. What are you going to do on the night you sign off the internet, and look around you to find the soldiers of God standing around waiting for their orders to march you off to wherever oblivion is stored these days? You going to bitch about how much the Discordians suck? Blame your ineffectiveness against the fascist takeover of America on something else...like yourself. And your failure to see how it was coming.

In any event, fuck Iraq. That said, I will probably see some of you in the summer camps in the coming years. Maybe if we haven't been tortured into mindlessness we may find amusement in turning all the hymns to Jesus into hymns to Eris or something else. Perhaps we may even be able to hold out until the day that Canada finally decides to say "fuck it and fuck Iraq too" and attacks the US and liberates us. (You don't think Canada is waiting for the chance to pounce of American Stupidity at the first opportunity?)

September 3rd, 2005

-Irreverend Hugh, KSC
(Under the influence of reading about Christian Reconstructionists, Corporatists, and the Project for the New American Century.)