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It's ok, it was a long time ago. I'm better now. 

The sad part of the story is that it was my first taste of wine.   

you're one of those people who looks forward to Nouveau Beaujolais, aren't you?

I have to admit that I am not a wine drinker, or even much of a drinker at all, at least not lately. I am completely ignorant as to what makes a wine "good" or "bad". I do know the worst wine I've ever had was some kind of Jewish sacrament wine.

The best wine I've ever had was some homemade stuff made by mashing up some grapes in a bucket with table sugar and water. This stuff almost always winds up sweet from unfermented sugar, slightly vinegary, and of moderate alcohol content.

Except for the excess sugar, it's probably pretty healthy.

I guess I'm just blessed with a taste for vinegary wines.


Bring us some fresh wine! The freshest you've got - this year! No more of this old stuff.
                                                       \

I've heard of those, but I'm not sure if I've ever eaten any.

It was looking a little flat earlier today when I aerated and added nutrients, but it's pretty fizzy right now.

I try not to peek in on it more than 2-3 times a day, but it's hard sometimes. 

Everybody knows Discordians make the best Pruno.

that's not wine.

that's fucking Pruno.

It's a horsefeed bucket full of liquid freedom.

I'll try making a variety of punches with it first. If I decide it's not fit to drink without distillation, I will distill.

I should add that I used citric acid instead of malic acid, and am not using a blanket or towel to insulate. It seems to be bubbling along nicely.

I aerated it for the first time today when I added the first dose of nutrient. (I'm splitting it up into 3 doses every two days.) I used a laboratory wash bottle and an aquarium bubble stone to filter the air through a mixture of hydrogen peroxide and water. The air bubbles through the water/H2O2 and goes through a few feet of sanitized tubing, into the must through a second bubble stone.

I just used my mouth to blow through it this time, but by the end my face was getting really, really tired. I've rigged up an air pump from a pneumatic motor that I can turn by hand, and it will pump air.

It's a specialized high grade hobo wine — high in alcohol, thin, lacking tannin, rather acid, but it actually tastes blandly
pleasant, and would probably mature in bottle quite well, and, by reason of its alcoholic
strength, might stay at its peak for a year.

I found a recipe on http://homedistiller.org for a cheap wine for distillation.

It costs about $10 and should produce the approximate equivalent of 2 gallons of vodka, or about a keg of beer. Should finish at 14% - 18%. The original recipe is for 25 liters, or about 6.6 gallons. That wouldn't fit in my bucket, so I'm doing a scaled down 5 gallon batch.

Actual recipe used :

Water to 5 gallons
Sugar  10 lb
can of wench's white grape juice concentrate (340ml)
1 pint extra pulp orange juice
2 5G packets of Lalvin EC-1118 yeast
3 tsp yeast nutrient
1.5 tsp yeast energizer
20g citric acid.

Followed original instructions:

Method
Invert the sugar by bringing 2 1.5 L water to the boil in a large pan and adding the sugar
and malic acid. Boil for 15 minutes, stirring well. Turn off the heat, and add water to cool.
Pour into a clean fermenter. Add grape concentrate, orange juice and nutrient. Make up to
25 L 5 gallons with water. Stir well. Allow to cool to 25 – 30 degrees C. Reactivate the dried yeast by
pouring into 50mL of filtered tap water which has been boiled and cooled to 30 degrees C.
Stir well. After 15 minutes add the yeast suspension to the fermenter. Put a fermentation trap
in place. Insulate the fermenter by wrapping it with a towel, or, in cold weather, a sleepingbag.
Partial aeration — by gently blowing air through the ferment for a minute or so — once
daily for the first three days and at the end of fermentation, when the SG is about 0.990 and
the bubbles are becoming infrequent — is beneficial. Allow the wine to rest in a cool place.
Fine if necessary, and rack off the yeast when clear.

Right now it's sitting in my shower so it won't make a mess if it overflows. According to the writer, the brew is drinkable as is. I'm gonna try diluting it with 1-2 parts fruit juice and see how it tastes. If it's crap, meh, I'm out $10 and 2 hours of my time.

"May a moody baby doom a yam".

A ti no, bonita.

 

watermelon and fried chicken flavored jelly bellies

fixx'd

During finals week I survived almost entirely on convenience store fried chicken and jelly beans.

In my defense, that convenience store has the best fried chicken, and they were JellyBelly beans.

 

I read it 9 times and it still doesn't make sense.