Principia Discordia

(http://i209.photobucket.com/albums/bb163/wompcabal/Tarot/IntermittensCover2.png)

Basically, what I'm after for turn at editing is an examination of what the building blocks of "modern" Discordia are, mostly in terms of what the general consensus is at PD. So far, the articles that I would like to include are my own take on what that is.

Few of the following articles I want to include have been given the final okay by their authors, and I have a number more I'll need to search for. The following list is just to set the tone of what I'm putting in:

STFU With Your Hippie Shit (http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=10635.0) -CAIN
State of a Union? (http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=11551.0) -HSD
Larry King Interview (http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=8328.msg284241#msg284241) -ENRICO
Short Circuits - Part 70 - Inaction  -LHX [Can't find where I yoinked this from straight away, I'll link later]
Memo from Ramses (http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=15295.msg484970#msg484970) -Unknown Author, found by Cramulus
Barbed Wire (http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=16844.msg548813#msg548813) -PAYNE

I'm going to cull some more "funnier" stuff from the Lollercaust thread, and probably include Cainads thing "who killed lulz".

Anyone else have suggestions for what you'd like to see included?

Any criticisms of what I've done or not done so far would be appreciated also.

This project is likely to run for a couple weeks (more than long enough between issues).

http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=18565.msg615870  Here's my first horrormirth column.  I may want to pick a more recent subject when it gets closer to the release date.

I really like this post, but it needs to be remixed^*:

Quote from: vexaph0d on January 03, 2007, 04:04:04 AM
as of.. i think 2005 1/2 or somewhere like that, "discordianism" is no longer supposed to make chuckles and lails (except at the expense of particular specific persons).  RAW is old hat, the PD (for which this forum and its mother site are not named, contrary to available evidence) is tapped, psychedelics are "bad for you," and everything must make sense or at least be both unintelligible and unfunny.

in keeping with Our New Philosophy, please to refrain from inanities or other frivolous garbage any more than once for every eighteen posts you make bitching about some Great Big Not-As-Funny-As-You-Might-Think something or other. and if you can't help but revert to that old discordianism from the 60's, please do it in the appropriate sub-forum and flush when you're finished.  or, if at all possible, put it on a web page far away from here and never link to it.

because discordianism isn't just about discord.  we got that out of our collective system 30 some-odd years ago.

kthxbai,

vexati0n,
will not catch hell.

*and maybe e-primed?

Reworked version:


"'Tis the soldier's life to have their balmy slumbers waked with strife."
- William Shakespeare quotes

An angry man stirreth up strife and a furious man aboundeth in transgression
- Proverbs 29:22

"I have a high art, I hurt with cruelty those who would damage me."
- Archirocus, 650 BC

So, you want to consider yourself a freethinker, do you?  You want to be a revolutionary, fighting against the forces of order?  Or perhaps you just like chaos, or want to have a good time.  Well listen up.

Most Discordians seem to think they have to live up to some sort of inane standard of wackiness.  And of course, most of them get this conception from the Principia Discordia which, while a founding book of Discordianism, is hardly the only valid viewpoint going around.  Or did you forget to pay attention to that "not believing what you read" part?  Anyway, back on point.  Your average Discordian believes acting in cute, inoffensive and nonsensical ways is somehow the "correct" way of doing things – and ironically is filled with a degree of venom for those who disagree, or make fun of them.

Now, there is nothing wrong with acting in such a way....not if you want everyone to ignore you anyway (not that there are not times this is not useful, only there are also times when it is counter-productive to whatever goals you are pursuing, that you require attention or to be seen as credible).  But lets be honest, it is not random, or funny or clever or especially impressive in any way.  Its a tired old script from a tired old book which is a single group's interpretation of Discordianism, and Eris.

Oh yes, Eris.  How many times will I be confronted by some Myspace girl with a name like xXxErIsxXx acting like what she thinks is a Greek Goddess?  "But Eris was all zany and stuff, don't you know?  It says so right in this book!"

No.  Sit your punk ass down, shut up and listen for once in your life, before you run your mouth off.  If you're going to take your lessons in Greek mythology from some Beatnik track, then you are stupid, and deserve to be mocked.  However, you are lucky.  Because today, I am at hand I am willing to give you an alternative explanation of the facts.  You do remember facts, don't you?  Good.  Well, if you haven't run away by this stage, I may as well get going.

Now, if you read the hippie-rag, you'll have the impression that Eris was the Greek goddess of Chaos, and that the Greeks, for some bizarre reason, concluded that chaos and strife were the same, and so fucked everything up until the Wonder Kids who wrote the PD set us all straight.  Wrong!  First off, Eris wasn't the Goddess of Chaos.  Secondly, her name means strife in the Ancient Greek.  That's a literal translation. Those Greeks were many things, pig-headed, unenlightened on sexual ethics, persistent raiders and looters, but one they were not was stupid.  If there is a Goddess calling herself Strife, what do you think she might be like?

Well here are some more clues.  Luckily for you, I had access to a pretty good Classical library a while back, and plenty of spare time.  And I went digging.  Hesiod, for example, answers the age old question posed in the PD, that of why do wars keep on happening if no-one wants them?  "[Eris] is hateful ... [she is the one] who builds up evil, war, and slaughter."  Alright, now we're talking!  How about that age old Greek classic, the founding epic of Western literature, the Iliad?  Well, according to our buddy Homer "Their fighting work [was woken by] . . . man-slaughtering Ares, and Eris, whose wrath is relentless."

And that's just the start of it. "[The] goddesses, who range in order the ranks of men in fighting, [are] Athene and Enyo, sacker of cities."  Enyo being another name for our Lady of Discord.  Sacker of cities sounds...well, kind of violent to me.  Maybe the sort of occupation where the chaos is a little more visceral, and the humour somewhat more black than normal.  We continue:  "Ares drove these [the Trojans] on, and the Akhaians grey-eyed Athene, and Phobos  drove them, and Deimos, and Eris whose wrath is relentless, she is the sister and companion of murderous Ares, she who is only a little thing at the first, but thereafter grows until she strides on the earth with her head striking heaven. She then hurled down bitterness equally between both sides as she walked through the onslaught making men's pain heavier."

For those of you not up on your Greek mythology, Ares was the god of War, and not in the good sense.  He reveled in slaughter, and was filled with blood lust.  Battle was another outlet for his bas instincts.  It was not, like for Athena or Zeus, the careful application of strategy towards a defined victory.  Obviously the same does not apply to Eris, she is the goddess of all strife after all, whether its clever and justified, or stupid and mean.  But she does have close relations with Ares, it is undeniable.  And that particular branch of the Olympian family tree was not viewed kindly. 

Eris didn't just have her fun in the Iliad either.  During the Thebaid, she assisted Hephaestus in making a cursed necklace, which drove the Thebans to fratricidal war.  During Dionysos' war against the Indians, she spurred him back into battle.  For Hera, she broke up marriages.  She was even there when Zeus fought the demonic dragon called Typhon, escorting him into the fight, though she took no part in his actual battle.  And of course, most famously, she stole a Golden Apple of the Hesperides, and initiated the Trojan War, in response to a snub.

So you can embrace the positive aspects of Disorder all you want, but maybe you should keep an eye to whom your role model and symbol for all this is, eh?  Chaos can be both positive and negative, but just like in rejecting the positive aspects of strife is denying that creative, freethinking touch, denying the "negative" aspects of strife also rejects the benefits that comes with it.

What benefits are these?  Think on it for a moment.  I'll give you a clue, from the epic Dionysiaca, if it will help.  "[Aion, god of time addresses Zeus:] 'Lord Zeus! behold yourself the sorrows of a despairing world!  Do you not see that Enyo [another name for Eris] has made the whole earth mad, mowing season by season her harvest of quick-perishing youth?"

That's Zeus, King of the Gods, he is addressing there.  Eris, a relatively minor goddess by Greek standards, has them so worried and afraid they are looking to the chief god himself to intervene.  And with good reason.  She was disruptive.  And dangerous.  And far too smart. Unlike Ares, great lumbering clod that he was, she successfully manipulated the vanities of three Olympians (not to mention putting Zeus in the difficult position of having to choose between his wife, daughter and the Goddess of Beauty) and caused a war which bought down one of the most powerful and rich cities of the time.  She was troublesome to the ruling order, in the extreme.

Only Hermes was anywhere near as vexing, and he was carefully kept under Zeus' thumb.  Eris answered ultimately to nobody.  But she got away with such things, time and time again.  And of course, you could say that you prefer the Eris you thought existed.  That the one above is not an especially pretty picture.  I would be inclined to agree, its not exactly the sort of attributes which, in and of themselves, are especially praiseworthy or benevolent.  But consider it this way – Eris was a disruptive goddess of strife and conflict, but it is never specified who she has to bring conflict to, or if her strife may serve a higher purpose.  You cannot make an omelette without breaking a few eggs, after all.  Or, if you prefer Terry Pratchett:

Fred grunted his disdain for a mere fact of geography. "War, Nobby. Huh! What is it good for?" he said.
"Dunno, sarge. Freeing slaves, maybe?"
"Absol- Well, okay."
"Defending yourself from a totalitarian aggressor?"
"All right, I'll grant you that, but-"
"Saving civilization against a horde of-"
"It doesn't do any good in the long run is what I'm saying, Nobby, if you'd listen for five seconds together," said Fred Colon sharply.
"Yeah, but in the long run what does, sarge?"

No doubt, some will call me an agent of destructive disorder.  And they're right...for a given value of right.  Noam Chomsky was wont to point out that everyone wants peace.  Everyone.  George W Bush.  Hitler.  Stalin.  Mao.  The question is, as always, on what terms?  Unfortunately for them, and many other, their terms are entirely unacceptable to me.  The wasteland's they would call "peace" are not worth considering.  I'd rather be the disgruntled outsider, kicking ass and causing havoc, than be on on anything they have to offer.

And that, my friends, is why I like Eris.  Not because of some incredibly bound counterculture book written before I was born.  Not because of its 60s and 70s centric, uncreative and repetitive adherents, whom for the most part have done nothing to build on such ideas, only disseminate them like the credible fools they are.  I like Eris because I want to live my life the way I please, and anyone who tries to stop that is in for a world of pain and misfortune, as only I know how to administer.  It is, as the man Archirocus says, a high art.  And well in keeping with the historical image of our Lady here.

Of course, its not a path for everyone.  And I won't pretend that.  All I'm saying is keep this in mind next time you're prepared to run some more of your hippie-trip by me.  Its your trip, not everyone else is interested in the ride.

Thanks muchly Cain. That reads really well.

I'll get to work putting that into magazine format.

Quote from: Cramulus on November 19, 2008, 02:36:53 AM
I really like this post, but it needs to be remixed^*:

Quote from: vexaph0d on January 03, 2007, 04:04:04 AM
as of.. i think 2005 1/2 or somewhere like that, "discordianism" is no longer supposed to make chuckles and lails (except at the expense of particular specific persons).  RAW is old hat, the PD (for which this forum and its mother site are not named, contrary to available evidence) is tapped, psychedelics are "bad for you," and everything must make sense or at least be both unintelligible and unfunny.

in keeping with Our New Philosophy, please to refrain from inanities or other frivolous garbage any more than once for every eighteen posts you make bitching about some Great Big Not-As-Funny-As-You-Might-Think something or other. and if you can't help but revert to that old discordianism from the 60's, please do it in the appropriate sub-forum and flush when you're finished.  or, if at all possible, put it on a web page far away from here and never link to it.

because discordianism isn't just about discord.  we got that out of our collective system 30 some-odd years ago.

kthxbai,

vexati0n,
will not catch hell.

*and maybe e-primed?

The going consensus in modern Discordianism is that we are no longer supposed to generate chuckles or "lulz," except at the expense of specific outcasts. RAW is Old Hat; the Principia Discordia is tapped out; psychedelics are bad for you, and everything must either make Serious Sense, or be both unintelligible and unfunny.

It is resolved, then, that in keeping with Our New Philosophy, you should refrain from inanity and other frivolous garbage appearing in your communication more often than once for every eighteen posts complaining about some Great Big Not-As-Funny-As-You-Might-Think Something or Other. And, if you cannot resist the urge to revert to the Old Discordianism from the 60's, please file your work with our History Dispatch Officer by scribbling it on a napkin, and using it to block the drain of the nearest urinal.

Because in today's complex world, even Discordians can't afford any more Discord.

Payne, would you like the questions Enrico answers to have a certain theme, or just any questions?  I lean toward a theme myself...

Quote from: BAWHEED on November 19, 2008, 04:26:40 PM
Payne, would you like the questions Enrico answers to have a certain theme, or just any questions?  I lean toward a theme myself...

I dunno, I like the idea that he's answering someone else questions already. A theme could be good, but I can't really get into Enricos head to figure out which line of questioning would produce the best and funniest answers.

EDIT: If you want to edit it to some kind of theme, feel free.

Hmm, I just remembered you  were putting in the Larry King interview.  Maybe he can wait until the next issue... a little Enrico goes a long way.

I'd be willing to write something short on why destructive disorder is necessary for progress to continue, but I don't know if that would really fit in. Plus, it wouldn't take me an article length to explain it. But that's okay -- we can fill the rest of the page with moustachioed men yelling oblique double-entendres.

I've got an idea or two, maybe.  After I get over my literary hangover, I'll dig some stuff out.

Building blocks for PD-style discordia, you say?

Hey what about this?  We can change names, locations, etc., Something I wrote shortly after BIP went to press. 

Quote from: Rev. What's-His-Name? on August 29, 2006, 04:27:31 PM
The following is an introductory piece for a publication the Maine Platypus Cabal is working on.  It is something I was working on when we were tossing around the idea of Lollercaust and was written post-BIP.  It is my hope that perhaps this can be the beginning of us getting things going again.

The Re-Birth of the Discordian Movement--
--which may be a delusion, or perhaps, indigestion.

It was another hot and hazy summer afternoon in the suburbs of South Portland, Maine. Two young gentlemen were hard at work at the Mall. Okay, so it was dead again, as usual, so they were once again discussing the machinations of the universe and how humanity reacts to them. They were, so they thought, students of Discordia.

Months prior, they had formed their own cabal. Oh yeah, intros! One was named Chuck Full-O-Pope and liked guns and other things involving ,Äòsplosions. The other was Reverend What's-His-Name? He was the President of the Warhammer Appreciation Club (WAC) and a Death Metal Aficionado. The former introduced the latter to the good book Principia Discordia and the ways of the Erisian movement. They had since annoyed their co-workers and all new employees with their teachings (ranting and raving really). This, sadly, quickened the already fast turnover in their retail hell.

Anyhoo, on this Tuesday, or perhaps it was Friday.  Does it matter? Ppppfffttt! Excuse me, So, it was a day...

"Ah, so that's why The Hoff is big in Germany." we hear Rev. saying.
"Hail Eris!" replies Chuck.

Just then, there was a brilliant flash, and then a loud pop. "Damned Chinese Light bulbs!" From behind them they hear:

"Excuse me gentlemen!"

To their amazement they see a lemur in a 3-piece standing behind them. Chuck and Rev. looked quite befuddled and confused and stuff.

"Yeah sorry, you were probably expecting the chimp. Sad really, he passed on about 20 years back. You didn't think he'd live forever did you? You know this sort of thing doesn't exactly come with dental and medical you know. Anyway, I was his understudy and have taken over operations." He paused to take a swig of something from a rusty flask, and then he continued, "I was actually offered a sweet gig by "Bob" but the jokes weren't as funny."

The two gentlemen then noticed that they were no longer in their retail-hell but in a lush green field. It looked like something out of the Sound of Music without all of the sing-songy crap.

"What's that smell?" Chuck asked.

"Oh, it's that broccoli field over there. The rest of it, all cabbages."

"Whoa! That's a lot of cabbage. I guess the cole-slaw industry is safe." remarked The Rev.

"That was unfunny." retorted the dashing primate, "But the abundance of cabbage is why I have appeared before you two young lads."

He took another drink from his flask and took a nibble out of what appeared to be an Oreo Cookie. I know. Anyway,...

"My mentor appeared before your Discordian founding fathers over 40 years ago. To neither his, nor my, surprise, things have not got any better. While the word of Goddess has spread, the cabbages are outpacing it."

"Your efforts are being impeded by poseurs and fad-hoppers. The youth have the misguided notion that tagging Longfellow's statue with Krylon is going to change the world. The world has become more hopeless than ever before. Your voter turnout for American Idol is ten times your voter turnout for President. And, please explain to me how David Hasselhoff still has a career."

He then pulled from his pocket a key. On it was emblazed the Sacred Chao on one side and the Five-Fingered-Hand on the other.

"What's this?" asked Chuck.

"And I'd like to point out he has no pants and that was not a pocket he pulled that from." added The Rev.

With that, there was a loud crash and they found they were back in their Retail Hell. "Damned teenagers!"

Soon, both gentlemen realized their pockets felt heavier. They pulled out their keys to see that a new key had been added for both of them. The same as what the lemur had produced from his nether regions.

The author apologizes for the crass toilet humour but points out he is trying to keep up with the times.

"What does this go to I wonder?" pondered Chuck.
"If Eris is up to her tricks it's probably a Yugo." said The Rev.

Just then they heard a breathy voice. "No ma'am, I haven't seen your husband. If I were him I'd be at the bar trying to forget the last 10 years of my life."

"Okay, isn't this where we have the cathartic moment with the disembodied voice of Eris?" asked Rev.

Then the phone rang. Chuck answered and put it on speakerphone.

"Wish I'd had one of these cell phones when I was chatting with Mal and Omar. Anyhoo, you have there in your hands The Key. It's The Key to the door of the Black Iron Prison that society, and The Machine, have constructed around you. You silly humans have been unwitting participants in its creation. And the real kicker is, the lock on the door isn't really a lock. You've always had The Key to your freedom. You need but to open your mind, your freedom is only as out of reach as you make it."

"Neat, can we make copies?" asked Chuck.

"Well, in a way, yes. You and your comrades must revive what has lied dormant. The 60's are over. Times have changed. There are more closed minds and their Black Iron Prisons make them difficult to reach. The old jokes don't work anymore. You must find your voice to help others find theirs. Energize your network. Strengthen it. Expand it. And for Pete's sake, stop worrying about your 23 Pineal Glands and do something!"

"Um, I just have one more question," chimes in Rev. "What's all that noise?"

"Oh, sorry. I'm in Beantown checking out Brother LMNO's band.  (singing) Circular reasoning works because Circular reasoning works because, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah! Hey! Get your soon to be 4 fingered hand off my ass Teddy..." static, then silence.

"I guess even Goddess has crappy reception." remarked Chuck.

"So, do you think people will go for this?" Rev asked of Chuck.

"When in doubt, fuck it! When not in doubt, get in doubt." espoused Chuck.

"Can we resort to heavy blunt objects if it doesn't work?"
"Seems like a perfectly logical back-up plant to me." said Chuck.

And with that, the Discordian movement was reborn. As it turned out, the lemur got around, A LOT. And had made similar visits to other discordian cabals, episkoposes, and other rabbles. And through our little story perhaps we have inspired you to reactivate your cabal, even if it is but a one-man-band. If you haven't formed one, do it now. You have bretheren. We are drifters but you can fund us from time to time at places such as www.principiadiscordia.com and www.poee.co.uk, and other haunts and closets.

But, in the meantime, please, read on...

FOR THE RECORD:

Payne is no longer editing this issue, so i'm taking over.

POST MOAR SUBMISSIONS NOW. thanks.

He isn't?  Why not?

Payne has what we euphemistically refer to as an "internets problem"

Vex, are you keeping the same theme / cover?

same theme, new cover.

here is the list of people who swore on their mothers' graves that they would submit something for this publication, minus the people who actually have. if your name is on the list, please try to at least come up with a title for whatever it is you're going to submit. if your name is on the list and you already have submitted something, x-post it here so i can find it more easily :P

Quote from: Cramulus on December 01, 2008, 11:11:31 PM

Writers:
Payne - will write a General column
Cainad - writes "Who Killed the Lulz"
Hoopla - Advice Column / Glorious Antics
Manta Obscura - some column
Requiem - Horrormirth (current events)
Nigel - Pranking
Iason - take some of the questions from Billy Graham's daily column and answer them from a Discordian perspective
Jenne - Speaking as a Mother


Artists:
Telarus - will provide doodles or layout on demand
Nurbldoff - Illustrations (suggestions must be provided)
Harlequin - Artwork


Misc.
Khara - Miscellaneous assistance ("I'm in to do whatever is needed.")
LMNO - something
Enki - fake ads

Nurbldoff - since you wanted suggestions, i suggest you start with some quick graphics that can go in as extras, not necessarily related to anything else. preferably something that conveys the feeling of trench warfare or mass starvation or other such lighthearted subjects.

also, if you've got a new submission ready, please PM them to me rather than posting them here. i'd like to keep the content in the magazine so people who want to read it actually have to get the magazine.

I told Payne that since he was planning to use the Enrico interview with Larry King that I was going to refrain from starting his column until the next issue.   

Here is the link:  http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=8328.0 (http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=8328.0)

Mine might be more of a "prank report" with pictures, because if I have to do a prank a month I think I'll be more inspired.

Quote from: Nigel on December 04, 2008, 02:18:10 AM
Mine might be more of a "prank report" with pictures, because if I have to do a prank a month I think I'll be more inspired.

this is the best idea ever.

Khara and I are workin' hard on a sort of "Toys for Asshats" list.

issue #2 cover [still under construction]:
(http://loki.discoflux.com/img/imittens2draft.png)

Swote!  I'm glad you corrected the spelling of the word "sustaining".  It was starting to bug me in Kai's thread.

Is this still themed on the Building blocks of the New Discordia?

yeah, since we seem to be on a roll with that topic, and i don't want to screw up any momentum we might already have.

Cool.

I'll see what I can whip up today.

Here is the Whoroscope that I whipped up previously. I shall post the Discordian-style Whoroscope momentarily, as well as Cram's description of the five Discordian "signs."

I am also working on a non-fluff essay about building blocks of Discordia which should be ready either today or tomorrow, and shall post that as well.






Whoroscope
By Manta Obscura

Your Birthday Today
November [Insert Date Here], 2008

Happy anniversary of being pushed headfirst from your mother's vagina! Today will bring an unexpected surprise or two from a person you haven't met in awhile. I don't wanna spoil the fun, so I'll just say this: it rhymes with menital merpes.

Aries
March 21-April 19

You'll incur some unexpected expenses in the coming months, mainly in the form of strip-club bills. Try to counteract this financial offset with some extra frugality right now.

Taurus
April 20-May 20

You'll receive an unexpected and pleasant call today from some piece of ass that totally wants to jump your bones. Unfortunately, the resulting Butterfly Effect from the phone ringing will cause the destruction of a village in India. Good luck dealing with your guilt, fucker.

Gemini
May 21-June 20

Mars is in peak zenith to the arc of Saturn at Capricorn, and erstwhile the astrological configurations of Io are in conjunction with the thelema of your body's quark spin. You know what that means . . .

Cancer
June 21-July 22

Your astrological sign is retarded, and causes pain and suffering to millions. Go throw yourself to the river.

Leo
July 23-August 22

Marital relations should be approached with caution in the next few days. Especially since your wife caught you crooning the name of that new hottie down in HR during your sleep. I mean, damn.

Virgo
August 23-September 22

You've undoubtedly been feeling a surge of energy and good vibes recently, leading you to greet others with a smile and a "Howdy-do!" in the mornings. Well, stop it. That shit is annoying for those of us who aren't morning people.

Libra
September 23-October 22

Take off that tie; you look like an idiot in purple. Your black one is at the back of your closet, on the left.

Scorpio
October 23-November 21

Go grab a copy of today's local paper and check the Advanced Crossword. You got it? Okay: do you have any idea what the hell 21 Down is supposed to be?

No?

Fuck.

Sagittarius
November 22-December 21

Cosmic forces are coalescing to send you some positive spiritual energy. Help them out with a few shots of tequila.

Capricorn
December 22-January 19

That hottie you're seeing this Friday?

Trannie. Pre-op.

Aquarius
January 20-February 18

The spirits of your deceased loved ones are cheering you on in your business endeavors from the Beyond. Ignore them and go play frisbee.

Pisces
February 19-March 20

That joke you keep telling about the parrot, the monkey and the Jehovah's Witness sucks hairy balls. The spirits and I hope you get hit by a car for your failure.

The First-Ever Discordian Whoroscope*

Horse
January 1-March 12

The prophet John the Baptist once said, "Shit, my head hurts. Does anyone have any Advil?" Likewise, be grateful for what you have while you still have it.

Goat
March 13-June 3

After a recent trip to the China Buffet, I opened my fortune cookie only to discover the message, "You're a good person and". And what? And I'll win a million dollars? And I'll come down with syphilis? And I'll find out that my wife is really my long-lost sister, and our children will end up incestuous mutants?

Ruminate upon life's mysteries today. And if you know the rest of the fortune, call me up and give me a clue.

Beetle
June 4-August 16

The philosopher Soren Kierkegaard once wrote, "People demand freedom of speech as a compensation for the freedom of thought which they seldom use." Take his message to heart and shut the fuck up.

Buick
August 17-October 31

If you're making sugar cookies and the batter isn't sweet enough, adding one small package of vanilla pudding mix for every two-dozen yield batter concoctions will give your cookies the sweetness you desire.

Enchilada
November 1-December 31

The Buddha might have had perfect inner peace, but he was one fat sonofabitch with no real dating prospects. Convert to Hinduism for maximum deity sexiness.





*Believe at your own risk.

Cram's descriptions (introductory text and references have been edited from post):

Quote from: Cramulus on November 24, 2008, 04:05:51 PM
Horse - Horses tend to be either introverts or extroverts depending on their mood. They are positive and cheerful, but there has been a time in their past when they were very upset.

Goat - Goats are known for loving their parents, having friends, and working a steady job. They often have a box of old unsorted photographs in their house.

Beetle - Beetles enjoy the finer things in life, and avoid things they dislike. Beetles are very kind and considerate people, but when somebody does something to break their trust, they feel deep-seated anger.

Buick - Those born under the Buick are sometimes insecure, especially with people they don't know very well. They are mostly shy and quiet, but when the mood strikes them, they can easily become the center of attention.

Enchilada - Enchiladas sometimes have problems with friends or relatives. Nearly all Enchiladas had an accident when they were a child involving water.

oops, typo spotted

under "Goat", change to

QuoteGoat - Goats are known for loving their parents, having friends, and working a steady job. They often have a box of old unsorted photographs in your their house.

Vex, sexy cover! I want to wine and dine it, then take it back to my place for "kindling"

Quote from: Cramulus on December 04, 2008, 03:18:10 PM
oops, typo spotted

under "Goat", change to

QuoteGoat - Goats are known for loving their parents, having friends, and working a steady job. They often have a box of old unsorted photographs in your their house.

Vex, sexy cover! I want to wine and dine it, then take it back to my place for "kindling"

I actually sort of liked the creepy implications of a Goat having a box of unsorted photos in the reader's house, but I have fixed it, just the same.

And I agree, Vex, your cover makes me happy. I would definitely tap that ass:

Quote from: vexati0n on December 04, 2008, 07:17:52 AM
(http://loki.discoflux.com/img/imittens2draft.png)

Quote from: Iason Ouabache on December 04, 2008, 08:20:50 AM
Swote!  I'm glad you corrected the spelling of the word "sustaining".  It was starting to bug me in Kai's thread.

You could have just told me it was wrong.  :|

Dang, I better ramp up the time I'm spending on formatting/layout... will do.

This is a little rough because I just finished it, but I thought I woud post it as a possible entry in Intermittens 2. I shall also create a new thread in which it may be critiqued and discussed.


Building Blocks, an Allegory in Three Parts
Or
The Wisdom of St. Teresa of Avila
By Manta Obscura

On the built-in wall shelf in my living room rests a dusty and bulbous protrusion of Lego blocks that, if one squints at them hard enough, sort of resemble the castle on the box in which they came. The toy has degenerated into one great, leftover battle scar of what it once was, its great spires crumbling after repeated exposures to hardwood floors while under the influence of gravity. The Lego persons within it all miss some sort of vital appendage, and are scattered throughout the broken battlements in various awkward, lewd or compromising positions. My wife, family, friends, and anyone else who has an ounce of decorative taste tell me that the whole eyesore should be removed at once and should be replaced, ideally, with a tasteful knick-knack, or at worst a fully functional Lego contraption. I refuse to move it, partly because I still play with it, fiddling around with the pieces while watching Bob Ross in the afternoons, but mostly because the castle has become a symbol to me.

Whenever I tinker with the pieces, I reflect on how our inner lives – our inner castles, as the Christian mystic St. Teresa of Avila would say – are a lot like the Lego pieces. We start our lives with just the base, the biology, the big green foundation piece on which the other Legos are built. As we grow there are others, be they friends, parents, bosses, leaders, lovers or whoever, who take part in writing our instruction manual, in shaping us into the strong, sturdy structure that the rules tell us we should be.

Follow the manual, and your castle will come out looking great, just like on the box. You will have two spires, one draw bridge, and a Lego treasure chest tucked beneath the dungeon trapdoor. Your two knights will be positioned at opposite sections along the wall fortifications, and your wizard will be in the leftmost tower with his wand.

When, at the tender age of eight, I first built the castle, I loved the original design. I loved riding the horses through the drawbridge, or hosting swordfights in the court. All was as it should be.

But after a while, the toy lost its charm. Having exhausted the fun of the design, I didn't want to play with it any longer. Having taken so much time building it up, I didn't want to change it. And so the castle was exiled for years on end, dwelling in closets, attics and basements, forgotten in the daily routine of life. At certain times it would sneak out to festoon my shelves, but never again did the old design entice me to play.

It is only by a happy accident – a misplaced brush of the hand, a sudden topple and the explosion of a thousand pieces – that the old design ever came to change. For as the old design was destroyed, I was forced to put the piece together again.

There always comes a time when something breaks the castle walls. It is during those times that one must seriously think about how to build, how to put the walls together again, for when the blocks fall down you have a choice to make: follow the plans, or just say "fuck all" and wing it?

When my castle broke it occurred to me, on a whim, that the only thing that had been holding it together was tradition. The stagnant stillness of uniformity and repetition had kept the walls intact. But now, like a minor miracle, was the chance to change things up, to make it fun again. I began to build.

Spires rose from courtyards. The dungeon filled with gold. Brave Lego knights were dressed in princess hats and put on the backs of dragons. Doors were built that led to nowhere, and the wizard escaped his spire.

The castle was no longer the sterile, dusty tomb it had been. The walls were replaced, rebuilt elsewhere, the tenants changed and charged with new duties from their former deadened vigils.

All was as it should be.

*   *   *

I take apart the castle now and then, putting it together to suit my tastes at the moment. The current motif is medieval techno rave party. I hope the Lego men are having fun.

After you take the first step in pushing through the original design, it gets ever-easier replacing blocks, changing bridges, and pulling apart the treasure inside. It gets easier stealing pieces from the Space Station Lego set to turn last week's cowboy ninjas into dragon astronauts.

The newness lasts for awhile, and then interest and use subsides. Something new must be built.

That's when you turn on Bob Ross and start thinking of whether your Shaman Troll will look better in an industrial city or in a dark moon's chasm, hidden from the stars.

*   *   *

St. Teresa found God behind the innermost wall of her interior castles. As I play with my Legos, building new spires from broken bridges, I wonder what I'll find in mine.

Here's a re-interpretation of an old piece.


THE NEW CHART

I'm sure most of you are familiar with the Ancient Chart of Order and Disorder.  Well, if not, here's a quick recap:

Principia Discordia, 00063, "The Curse of Greyface".

THE CURSE OF GREYFACE AND THE
  INTRODUCTION  OF NEGATIVISM 
      To choose order over disorder, or disorder over order, is to accept a trip composed of both the creative and the destructive. But to choose the creative over the destructive is an all-creative trip composed of both order and disorder. To accomplish this, one need only accept creative disorder along with, and equal to, creative order, and also willing to reject destructive order as an undesirable equal to destructive disorder.
      The Curse of Greyface included the division of life into order/disorder as the essential positive/negative polarity, instead of building a game foundation with creative/destructive as the essential positive/negative. He has thereby caused man to endure the destructive aspects of order and has prevented man from effectively participating in the creative uses of disorder. Civilization reflects this unfortunate division.
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v711/Marburger/OldChart.jpg)
POEE proclaims that the other division is preferable, and we work toward the proposition that creative disorder, like creative order, is possible and desirable; and that destructive order, like destructive disorder, is unnecessary and undesirable.
      Seek the Sacred Chao - therein you will find the foolishness of all ORDER/DISORDER. They are the same!

Now, while that is very interesting, several of us were thinking a few things:
1. It reeks of hippiedom.
2. It is still dualistic.
3. Some of us like breaking stuff.

So, we thought about it, and made a new chart:
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v711/Marburger/NewChartJpeg.jpg)

Now:  Possibilities arise fourfold.  The original pattern remains, Creative Order/Disorder, and Destructive Order/Disorder.  But rather than limiting one's observances to an essentially two dimensional outlook, we may expand upon it.*

Orderly Disorder:  The means and methods of predictable chaos, a false front; often used by cabbages to pass themselves off as wise.  They force them selves into carefully planned actions which may look Eristic at first glance, but are almost entirely Aneristic.

Orderly Creation:  Architecture, Mathematics, Haiku, Fugues; Creative energies bound by strict rules, yet yielding great works that bring beauty into the world.  In this light, structure and boundaries are not the enemy, they are merely tools with which to create.

Orderly Destruction:  The triumph of the Aneristic Illusion.  Everything is rules.  No freedom exists, for it is bound by carefully crafted commandments.  The creative spirit has been vanquished, crushed.  Kafka wrote in this spirit, where precise order destroyed the world and the people who lived by them.

Disorderly Order:  Complex arrangements that appear to be Disorderly, but follow a specific set of rules; Chaos Theory.  Also covers the 80/20 rule (for example: when cooking, 80% of the time, you use only 20% of your available spices, which eventually gravitate to the front of the cupboard), and the clutter of a desk where only the person sitting there knows where the stapler is.

Disorderly Creation:  Using Eristic means to Create; Cf. Jackson Pollock, John Cage, Free Jazz, etc.  There is no box to think outside of.  Notoriously difficult to pull off, due to the lack of reference points most humans use to understand Reality.

Disorderly Destruction:  Most Natural Disasters.  Many cabbages consider this the only aspect of Chaos.  This is the scary, unfeeling Abyss of the Irrational Godless Universe.

Creative Order:  The means and methods to which one brings the Aneristic Illusion into greater perception.  The establishing of rules.  Somewhere, someone had a new, creative Idea about how to put things in order.  The creation of written language, for instance, is a  brilliant and insightful way of codifying thought into an orderly system.  Of course, this is also the realm of justifications for repression.

Creative Disorder:  The intended results of Operation: Mindfuck-- that is, one creates a clever and specific kind of disorder, whose purpose is to turn neophobes into neophiles.  Like Creative Order only reversed, it's the willful bringing into existence of things that go beyond the rules, which escape classification. 

Creative Destruction:  The answer to the usual objection to the original Creation/Destruction chart: to wit, "you have to destroy in order to create".  In fact, if one moves beyond the merely physical into the conceptual, every major artistic breakthrough has come from breaking/abandoning/destroying the "rules" in a creative way.

Destructive Order:  When the rules and paradigms that repress and inhibit Freedom and Creation are followed or used.  It's not the rules that are harmful, it's the application of the rules.  "Just following orders" without thinking.  However, could also be the methods used by Gandhi and MLK; Civil Disobedience.  Causing Disorder through non-chaotic action.

Destructive Disorder:  Behavior and actions that are harmful; various psychoses and self-destructive habits; temper tantrums.  This relates to one of the squares on the Old Chart, and generally carries with it negative implications.  There is no Joy, or purpose; there is no greater good.   

Destructive Creation:  The process of building things that have no purpose but to destroy.  Oppenheimer, creating the Nuclear Bomb; or Bioengineering new viruses that can wipe out the planet.  In general, these are poorly directed creative energies.

Which leaves us with 4 spaces left: Orderly Order, Disorderly Disorder, Creative Creation, and Destructive Destruction.  What do they mean?  The fuck if I know.  And there lies the first clue.  They are also the purest forms of these aspects.  That is the second clue.  You can come up with other clues on your own.  Regardless, it soon becomes obvious that if one takes the four purest elements and combines them simultaneously into a fifth, Eris is born.  She is all things, all conflicting ideas, all concepts, all aspects.  Hence, the 5-fingered hand of Eris occupies those spaces.

Of course, when you take the New Chart to it's obvious conclusion, you can create an even newer chart with things like Destructive Disorderly Order, and Creative Destructive Disorderly Order, and Orderly Creative Destructive Disorderly Order etc.  I leave this exercise up to the reader, as it's getting late, and I'm almost out of scotch.




*The wise-assed among us would like to remind the reader that ultimately, every single square in this chart should contain the Hand, as this is merely another exercise in Illusion, and these aspects are merely interpretations of that which is Chaos.  Fair enough.  Turn the page.

Excellent LMNO. Whenever I read this material, it reminds me of the "5 Windows" graphic (can someone tell me what that was from?..oop, found it, it's part of the "Random Stuff" (http://appendix.23ae.com/stuff.html) portion of DrJon's Apocrypha). You may think of including it:

(http://appendix.23ae.com/stuff/five_windows.gif)

I really like that piece, LMNO. Really well done.

Quote from: Telarus on December 04, 2008, 04:42:20 PM
Dang, I better ramp up the time I'm spending on formatting/layout... will do.

I may be incorrect, but I think Vex is laying out his issue on his own. Still though, plz ramp up layout! It'd be nice to re-release the november issue before Dec is ready.

Thanks, guys.

Apart from helping birth the BIP, this is one of the only things I really ever did.

And it was four years ago  :x

Jenne and I are doing the final review and we'll have our submission posted by tomorrow!   :D

I think Vex wants you to PM him your submission rather than posting it

that way people have to actually read the magazine.  :wink:

Ah.

:spag:

:lulz:  It's basically done.  And it's fluffy as hell.

I thought Payne was editing this edition.....

Okl, I am PMing to Vex

Quote from: Manta Obscura on December 04, 2008, 05:54:33 PM
This is a little rough because I just finished it, but I thought I woud post it as a possible entry in Intermittens 2. I shall also create a new thread in which it may be critiqued and discussed.


Building Blocks, an Allegory in Three Parts
Or
The Wisdom of St. Teresa of Avila
By Manta Obscura

On the built-in wall shelf in my living room rests a dusty and bulbous protrusion of Lego blocks that, if one squints at them hard enough, sort of resemble the castle on the box in which they came. The toy has degenerated into one great, leftover battle scar of what it once was, its great spires crumbling after repeated exposures to hardwood floors while under the influence of gravity. The Lego persons within it all miss some sort of vital appendage, and are scattered throughout the broken battlements in various awkward, lewd or compromising positions. My wife, family, friends, and anyone else who has an ounce of decorative taste tell me that the whole eyesore should be removed at once and should be replaced, ideally, with a tasteful knick-knack, or at worst a fully functional Lego contraption. I refuse to move it, partly because I still play with it, fiddling around with the pieces while watching Bob Ross in the afternoons, but mostly because the castle has become a symbol to me.

Whenever I tinker with the pieces, I reflect on how our inner lives – our inner castles, as the Christian mystic St. Teresa of Avila would say – are a lot like the Lego pieces. We start our lives with just the base, the biology, the big green foundation piece on which the other Legos are built. As we grow there are others, be they friends, parents, bosses, leaders, lovers or whoever, who take part in writing our instruction manual, in shaping us into the strong, sturdy structure that the rules tell us we should be.

Follow the manual, and your castle will come out looking great, just like on the box. You will have two spires, one draw bridge, and a Lego treasure chest tucked beneath the dungeon trapdoor. Your two knights will be positioned at opposite sections along the wall fortifications, and your wizard will be in the leftmost tower with his wand.

When, at the tender age of eight, I first built the castle, I loved the original design. I loved riding the horses through the drawbridge, or hosting swordfights in the court. All was as it should be.

But after a while, the toy lost its charm. Having exhausted the fun of the design, I didn’t want to play with it any longer. Having taken so much time building it up, I didn’t want to change it. And so the castle was exiled for years on end, dwelling in closets, attics and basements, forgotten in the daily routine of life. At certain times it would sneak out to festoon my shelves, but never again did the old design entice me to play.

It is only by a happy accident – a misplaced brush of the hand, a sudden topple and the explosion of a thousand pieces – that the old design ever came to change. For as the old design was destroyed, I was forced to put the piece together again.

There always comes a time when something breaks the castle walls. It is during those times that one must seriously think about how to build, how to put the walls together again, for when the blocks fall down you have a choice to make: follow the plans, or just say “fuck all” and wing it?

When my castle broke it occurred to me, on a whim, that the only thing that had been holding it together was tradition. The stagnant stillness of uniformity and repetition had kept the walls intact. But now, like a minor miracle, was the chance to change things up, to make it fun again. I began to build.

Spires rose from courtyards. The dungeon filled with gold. Brave Lego knights were dressed in princess hats and put on the backs of dragons. Doors were built that led to nowhere, and the wizard escaped his spire.

The castle was no longer the sterile, dusty tomb it had been. The walls were replaced, rebuilt elsewhere, the tenants changed and charged with new duties from their former deadened vigils.

All was as it should be.

*   *   *

I take apart the castle now and then, putting it together to suit my tastes at the moment. The current motif is medieval techno rave party. I hope the Lego men are having fun.

After you take the first step in pushing through the original design, it gets ever-easier replacing blocks, changing bridges, and pulling apart the treasure inside. It gets easier stealing pieces from the Space Station Lego set to turn last week’s cowboy ninjas into dragon astronauts.

The newness lasts for awhile, and then interest and use subsides. Something new must be built.

That’s when you turn on Bob Ross and start thinking of whether your Shaman Troll will look better in an industrial city or in a dark moon’s chasm, hidden from the stars.

*   *   *

St. Teresa found God behind the innermost wall of her interior castles. As I play with my Legos, building new spires from broken bridges, I wonder what I’ll find in mine.

:bacon: :mittens:  :cheers:

this is the part where everybody finds weird clip art and posts it here.

Ok, it's not clip art, but...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v711/Marburger/HeadExplodeBig.gif)
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v711/Marburger/fluffy.jpg)
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v711/Marburger/Fredstamp.jpg)
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v711/Marburger/Mohammed.jpg)
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v711/Marburger/Devilclip.jpg)
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v711/Marburger/HIMEOBSGIFTCARD.jpg)
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v711/Marburger/flyeridea-chainsaw.jpg)
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v711/Marburger/Majeek.jpg)
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v711/Marburger/olyMPICHUMOR.jpg)
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v711/Marburger/tombstonethingsfellapart.jpg)
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v711/Marburger/Obamaniac.jpg)
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v711/Marburger/Eris%20propoganda/notfree.jpg)

Wikipedia's public domain art (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Public_domain_image_resources) page has a ton of links - digging around reveals a lot of miscellaneous drawings and photography.

http://www.fromoldbooks.org/Vesalius-Fabrica/
(http://www.fromoldbooks.org/Vesalius-Fabrica/pages/606-quivering-brain/606-quivering-brain-q80-500x456.jpg)



http://openclipart.org/media/tags
(http://openclipart.org/people/rg1024/rg1024_strange_personal_icons.png)
(http://openclipart.org/people/ossidiana/ossidiana_fish_with_umbrella.svg)
(http://openclipart.org/people/mystica/mystica_Funny_Fish.png)



edit to add:
I don't know about you guys, but finding public domain images makes me giddy... It makes me want to USE all this stuff that's literally lying around to be used. Public Domain is a fucking awesome concept, and it makes me angry at copyright.

http://www.briarpress.org/cuts (http://www.briarpress.org/cuts)
We scan ornaments and initials from old specimen books, then convert them into vector line art. You can use them in your print or digital work, even on your letterpress.
(http://www.briarpress.org/?q=system/files/peacock.png) (http://www.briarpress.org/?q=system/files/gryphon.png) (http://www.briarpress.org/?q=system/files/images/way4.png) (http://www.briarpress.org/?q=system/files/images/skull.png)

http://www.fromoldbooks.org/ (http://www.fromoldbooks.org/)
Over 2,340 high-resolution images scanned from more than 100 different old or rare books, with extracts!
(http://www.fromoldbooks.org/ScribnersMagazine-1903-11/pages/063-Diamonds-on-Credit-detail-for-valentines-day/063-Diamonds-on-Credit-detail-for-valentines-day-q75-500x375.jpg)


http://www.loc.gov/rr/print/catalog.html (http://www.loc.gov/rr/print/catalog.html)
Library of Congress Prints and Photographs Reading Room.

http://digitalgallery.nypl.org/nypldigital/explore/dgexplore.cfm?topic=all (http://digitalgallery.nypl.org/nypldigital/explore/dgexplore.cfm?topic=all)
New York Public Library Digital Gallery

PROTIP: You need to make sure that the digital image of a public domain item is also public domain. Believe it or not, reproductions can be copyrighted whilst the original physical item is in the public domain.

Quote from: Net on December 11, 2008, 11:21:46 PM
PROTIP: You need to make sure that the digital image of a public domain item is also public domain. Believe it or not, reproductions can be copyrighted whilst the original physical item is in the public domain.

Are you serious?

No, really, are you fucking serious?

All right, now I can say with full confidence that copyright law has gone off the deep end wearing lead shoes. Because that makes zero sense to me.

Not to mention the fact that this publication isn't being charged for and is in the Public Domain itself, so where exactly is the infraction?

assuming there might be a 3rd one?
(http://i197.photobucket.com/albums/aa261/broodwitch/sjefen.gif)(http://i197.photobucket.com/albums/aa261/broodwitch/octopus1.png)(http://i197.photobucket.com/albums/aa261/broodwitch/health-myths-2.jpg)(http://i197.photobucket.com/albums/aa261/broodwitch/clip3.jpg)(http://i197.photobucket.com/albums/aa261/broodwitch/76sand.jpg)(http://i197.photobucket.com/albums/aa261/broodwitch/361327549_31dc8d8a621.jpg)(http://i197.photobucket.com/albums/aa261/broodwitch/358461682_1246cec5c71.jpg)

Sprunt ITT

(http://i197.photobucket.com/albums/aa261/broodwitch/361327549_31dc8d8a621.jpg)

found it all on some blog somewhere

I see that issue 3 is in the works, I never got Issue 2.  For that matter, I never got Issue one in my email, I pulled it off here.

Are they being e-mailed out at all? 

Nope. Faust said that if we wanted, we could e-mail them to everybody reg'd at pd.com, but nobody gave the green light.

Well damn!

I think the Internet Safari blog should be the distribution point. Overlap audiences.

I think they should be emailed AND put up everywhere else we can think of!!!  Post links at other forums.  Put links in your signatures.... 

I may be a little late, but http://hypertextpoetry.blogspot.com/2008/12/reality-lol-reality.html this post of mine is free for anybody to put in.

Quote from: Cainad on December 11, 2008, 11:24:29 PM

Quote from: Net on December 11, 2008, 11:21:46 PM
PROTIP: You need to make sure that the digital image of a public domain item is also public domain. Believe it or not, reproductions can be copyrighted whilst the original physical item is in the public domain.

Are you serious?

No, really, are you fucking serious?

All right, now I can say with full confidence that copyright law has gone off the deep end wearing lead shoes. Because that makes zero sense to me.

It takes time and energy to make reproductions, and these reproductions can be copyrighted. It may have required traveling and special equipment to make as well.

Irritating technicalities, I know...

Quote from: vexati0n on December 12, 2008, 01:24:42 AM
Not to mention the fact that this publication isn't being charged for and is in the Public Domain itself, so where exactly is the infraction?

I don't know what you're so defensive about, I didn't accuse anyone of copyright infringement. I'm just tossing this out there for anyone who wants to cover their ass.

You don't need to charge money to violate copyright. All you have to do is make a reproduction of it without permission.

However, it is exceedingly unlikely that such a silly, small and unknown publication is going to get prosecuted. And, most reproductions of public domain works are in the public domain as well, so you can relax your sphincter.

Yeah, copyright laws are crazy, yo. It never hurts to have your ass covered.

Unless you cover it with spikes. 

HELLO!!!!

I am mentioning agian that I have yet to see issue #2.  Can we at least get a link to something or something?

http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=18833.0 (http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=18833.0)

Quote from: InCrandible! on December 15, 2008, 08:43:12 PM
Nope. Faust said that if we wanted, we could e-mail them to everybody reg'd at pd.com, but nobody gave the green light.

I can and will do this if you require, just send me what you want mailed.