Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Discordian Recipes => Topic started by: Nast on February 10, 2010, 06:22:59 AM

Title: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Nast on February 10, 2010, 06:22:59 AM
So how does one gain weight?

For me, it isn't a body image issue or any of that crap, it's just that currently I'm 1 bmi point underweight and would not like to feel so waiflike that I have to tie myself down in gusty weather. Currently I'd say that gaining another 10 pounds is my goal.

I've always been a skinny kid. I also try to keep myself fed, eat breakfast and all, and I always follow a healthy diet. I was just wondering if there were any calorically dense foods I could be consuming. Much obliged!
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Jasper on February 10, 2010, 06:32:53 AM
Lots of coconut milk soup.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Nast on February 10, 2010, 06:45:46 AM
I could get behind that.

Nast,
Kills bunnies for some tom kha.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Jasper on February 10, 2010, 06:48:06 AM
If there's an inexpensive asian supermarket nearby, the cans of it are super cheap, too.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Nast on February 10, 2010, 06:52:49 AM
Unfortunately the nearest Asian market is a town away (I'd be so happy if there was one nearby. Ah, how I dream)
But there is an Indian market within walking distance, and that might just do the trick.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Bu🤠ns on February 10, 2010, 06:56:54 AM
Get older.  Marry a good cook.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Sir Squid Diddimus on February 10, 2010, 06:59:23 AM
slow down
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: NotPublished on February 10, 2010, 07:21:23 AM
You like eating fish? If so eat more. Omega-3 fat is good and health.
Increase your intake of Protein. Tuna seems to be a wonder-fish. (I hate eating it though :()
And eat more carbs also, so fruit and vegetables.

If this doesn't work then you may need to take it a step-further you can try take Protein supplements also.

Also its you may need to get into weight-lifting, this will help you build up mass.

So for breakfast, cereal + full cream milk, and whole grain toast (With some fruit + honey if you will .. I think banana and honey is nice on toast)
For lunch, fruit juices / Water (Sometimes you can't take too much sugar) .. and anything really - I'd probably could go for a whole-grain sandwich with some chicken or the likes since thats easy and quick to make.
Dinner, judging from the recipes you've posted you make awesome things! If you combine protein and carbs you'll probably gain weight fast.

BUT you dont want to over-do it, balance is always going to be important and I am sure your aware of that. I probably did miss something ... I'm gonna go eat now  :lulz:

Thats doing it healthy though.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: NotPublished on February 10, 2010, 07:38:03 AM
resistance training will guarantee mass-building =[ and its healthy!
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Nast on February 10, 2010, 07:53:06 AM
Quote from: NotPublished on February 10, 2010, 07:21:23 AM
You like eating fish? If so eat more. Omega-3 fat is good and health.
Increase your intake of Protein. Tuna seems to be a wonder-fish. (I hate eating it though :()
And eat more carbs also, so fruit and vegetables.

If this doesn't work then you may need to take it a step-further you can try take Protein supplements also.

Also its you may need to get into weight-lifting, this will help you build up mass.

So for breakfast, cereal + full cream milk, and whole grain toast (With some fruit + honey if you will .. I think banana and honey is nice on toast)
For lunch, fruit juices / Water (Sometimes you can't take too much sugar) .. and anything really - I'd probably could go for a whole-grain sandwich with some chicken or the likes since thats easy and quick to make.
Dinner, judging from the recipes you've posted you make awesome things! If you combine protein and carbs you'll probably gain weight fast.

BUT you dont want to over-do it, balance is always going to be important and I am sure your aware of that. I probably did miss something ... I'm gonna go eat now  :lulz:

Thats doing it healthy though.

Fish makes me feel guilty. Not because of their little beady eyes, but rather that I have access to it extremely fresh and I still don't eat enough of it. But I'm sure there at least some recipes that I'll like.
I like rice, and I end up eating alot of it. Long grain, short grain, it's all good. I could probably focus on eating it more in combination with pulses and legumes, and in its whole grain form, for the protein and carbs.
Thanks for the advice.

Quote from: Horrendous Foreign Love Stoat on February 10, 2010, 07:34:15 AM
make a concerted effort not to exercise AT ALL if possible, and take a couple of Ensure drinks with your regular foods.

The thing is I've got to walk a mile and back to the bus station on school days. It's okay though, because I'd rather not get into the habit of being sedentary.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Triple Zero on February 10, 2010, 09:44:57 AM
also, if you're supposed to believe all those people saying BMI is crap because they're a couple of points above "overweight" because they're "just heavy built like that", being just one point below "optimal weight" can't be too bad either.

otherwise, what the spage here say. if you walk a lot, you're probably exercising your leg muscles a lot. if you eat lots of protein and add some exercise in your upper body to that, you will increase (muscle) mass there, and get heavier.

great to hear you do care about eating healthy, though. please to keep that up, better to eat healthy and be one point below optimal, than to eat lots of greasy shit just to get to the "correct" amount of kilograms.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: LMNO on February 10, 2010, 02:29:18 PM
Beer.








Or, you could start lifting weights.  Muscle tends to weigh more than fat.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Richter on February 10, 2010, 02:46:16 PM
EAT PORK!
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Sir Squid Diddimus on February 10, 2010, 04:03:14 PM
Quote from: LMNO on February 10, 2010, 02:29:18 PM
Beer.








Or, you could start lifting weights.  Muscle tends to weigh more than fat.

I approve of this.
Drink beer. Lift weights.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Freeky on February 10, 2010, 05:23:29 PM
Or instead of beer, any of the recipes I've posted. i don't go in for healthy cooking, but neither are mah foods empty of nutrition.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Salty on February 10, 2010, 05:48:25 PM
I third the beer suggestion. It is the ONLY thing that does it for me. Dark beer and ales.

Alty,
One of those annoying "I can eat whatever I want and still manage to lose weight." people.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: LMNO on February 10, 2010, 05:50:23 PM
The other option is "get old".  You'll find the body starts getting all lumpy after a certain age.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Salty on February 10, 2010, 06:04:02 PM
Buy some protien powder the kind that body builders use. Drink one every day (I add a banana and a crap ton of of spinach) then build your body. I recommend buying a pullup bar you can attach to a door.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Freeky on February 10, 2010, 06:04:24 PM
Also, if you were a chick I'd suggest get prego. That would definitely stack the pounds on.















:lulz:
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Nast on February 10, 2010, 08:47:32 PM
Lol beer. I'm underage, and I don't think the delinquents who peddle beer in the park behind the bushes would happen to keep nice micro-brewed stouts in stock.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: LMNO on February 10, 2010, 08:49:09 PM
Quote from: Nast on February 10, 2010, 08:47:32 PM
Lol beer. I'm underage, and I don't think the delinquents who peddle beer in the park behind the bushes would happen to keep nice micro-brewed stouts in stock.

Quote from: LMNO on February 10, 2010, 05:50:23 PM
The other option is "get old".  You'll find the body starts getting all lumpy after a certain age.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: NotPublished on February 10, 2010, 08:50:16 PM
Quote from: Mistress Freeky on February 10, 2010, 06:04:24 PM
Also, if you were a chick I'd suggest get prego. That would definitely stack the pounds on.
:lulz:  :lulz: :lulz:
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Nast on February 10, 2010, 08:51:20 PM
Quote from: LMNO on February 10, 2010, 08:49:09 PM
Quote from: Nast on February 10, 2010, 08:47:32 PM
Lol beer. I'm underage, and I don't think the delinquents who peddle beer in the park behind the bushes would happen to keep nice micro-brewed stouts in stock.

Quote from: LMNO on February 10, 2010, 05:50:23 PM
The other option is "get old".  You'll find the body starts getting all lumpy after a certain age.

YEAH WELL I'M TOO LAZY TO GET OLD.  :argh!:
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Salty on February 10, 2010, 08:53:12 PM
Quote from: Nast on February 10, 2010, 08:47:32 PM
Lol beer. I'm underage, and I don't think the delinquents who peddle beer in the park behind the bushes would happen to keep nice micro-brewed stouts in stock.

Fucking heathens.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: NotPublished on February 10, 2010, 08:54:49 PM
Heard  few days ago that beer is good for bone density
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: LMNO on February 10, 2010, 08:56:30 PM
It makes you dense, that's for sure.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: NotPublished on February 10, 2010, 08:57:30 PM
See! No Cons, all Pros. GO FOR IT NAST
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on February 11, 2010, 02:57:38 AM
Meat, cheese, eggs, nuts, and whole grains are all good ways to put on a few pounds. Just make a point of eating one extra meal/snack a day, that should do it. Even one extra piece of buttered whole-grain toast daily will eventually add up.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: E.O.T. on February 11, 2010, 03:29:48 AM
Quote from: Alty on February 10, 2010, 08:53:12 PM
Quote from: Nast on February 10, 2010, 08:47:32 PM
Lol beer. I'm underage, and I don't think the delinquents who peddle beer in the park behind the bushes would happen to keep nice micro-brewed stouts in stock.

Fucking heathens.

The micros and good imports are for enjoyment alone. To get some girth you WANT the cheap shit, like BLACK ICE or CAMO. Nothing under 8.5%, buy two 40oz'ers at a time and see what happens after three months. Pure manly figure AND it'll age you - BONUS!
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Bu🤠ns on February 11, 2010, 05:19:43 AM
OH FFS JUST EAT A FAT KID.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Sir Squid Diddimus on February 11, 2010, 06:04:21 AM
Quote from: Burns on February 11, 2010, 05:19:43 AM
OH FFS JUST EAT A FAT KID.
:lulz:
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Nast on February 11, 2010, 06:08:44 AM
Quote from: Burns on February 11, 2010, 05:19:43 AM
OH FFS JUST EAT A FAT KID.

Gah, I would just have to prick one with the tines of my fork, and all the custard would come spilling out.  :horrormirth:

Quote from: Calamity Nigel on February 11, 2010, 02:57:38 AM
Meat, cheese, eggs, nuts, and whole grains are all good ways to put on a few pounds. Just make a point of eating one extra meal/snack a day, that should do it. Even one extra piece of buttered whole-grain toast daily will eventually add up.

Snacking would definitely be doable. Fitting in food in between meals rather than forcing myself to eat more at meals sounds nicer.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: LMNO on February 11, 2010, 01:37:59 PM
Have a pint of Ben and Jerry's every night before going to bed.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on February 11, 2010, 02:40:04 PM
Butter suppositories.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: LMNO on February 11, 2010, 02:44:56 PM
Quote from: Ne+@uNGr0+ on February 11, 2010, 02:40:04 PM
Butter suppositories.


I happen to have a very useful way of getting that last inch up there...




LMNO
-thinner than Brando.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Sir Squid Diddimus on February 11, 2010, 06:52:29 PM
 :lulz:  :cry:  :?  :x  :lol:  :horrormirth:  :fap:
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: hooplala on February 11, 2010, 09:30:26 PM
Quote from: Nast on February 10, 2010, 06:22:59 AM
So how does one gain weight?

For me, it isn't a body image issue or any of that crap, it's just that currently I'm 1 bmi point underweight and would not like to feel so waiflike that I have to tie myself down in gusty weather. Currently I'd say that gaining another 10 pounds is my goal.

I've always been a skinny kid. I also try to keep myself fed, eat breakfast and all, and I always follow a healthy diet. I was just wondering if there were any calorically dense foods I could be consuming. Much obliged!

If you're not sure about a certain food being fatty enough, rub it against a piece of paper.  If the paper turns clear, it's your window to weight gain!
               \
(http://www.sciencepunk.com/v5/gallery/Dr_Nick.png)
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Kurt Christ on February 12, 2010, 12:02:37 AM
Become a policeman. Get half-price donuts.
Title: Re: I HAS A SILLY QUESTION
Post by: Sir Squid Diddimus on February 12, 2010, 04:47:19 AM
Quote from: Hoopla on February 11, 2010, 09:30:26 PM
Quote from: Nast on February 10, 2010, 06:22:59 AM
So how does one gain weight?

For me, it isn't a body image issue or any of that crap, it's just that currently I'm 1 bmi point underweight and would not like to feel so waiflike that I have to tie myself down in gusty weather. Currently I'd say that gaining another 10 pounds is my goal.

I've always been a skinny kid. I also try to keep myself fed, eat breakfast and all, and I always follow a healthy diet. I was just wondering if there were any calorically dense foods I could be consuming. Much obliged!

If you're not sure about a certain food being fatty enough, rub it against a piece of paper.  If the paper turns clear, it's your window to weight gain!
               \
(http://www.sciencepunk.com/v5/gallery/Dr_Nick.png)

:lulz: :lulz: :lulz: