:argh!:
I have only myself to blame. I've gotten about half way through Shirer's rather magnificent "Rise and Fall of the Third Reich." Anyway, I'm messing around on TPB, looking for the text of those leaked diplomatic cables, when I see there is a TV program called "Ancient Aliens" and this particular episode is called Aliens of the Third Reich. I'm dubious, but download it for a laugh.
Now I want to kill someone. And I see this is produced by the so-called History Channel, no less.
:x
:lulz:
Im going to find that later tonight after class
I think I may have seen this. It was interesting, but speculative fiction should be presented as such. Especially if it's on the History Channel.
The only thing that I remember the History Channel doing something like this was their episode on Die Glocken and the other one on Nazi efforts to create a flying disc. Gonna have to look this one up for a laugh.
Blight,
Misses the days when the History Channel was obsessed with the Roman Empire and the Civil War.
I actually watched a bit of one of the Ancient Aliens episodes. It centered around evidence of Aliens mining for gold way back before humans were mining. It was pretty goofy.
The History Channel does have a few jewels in the rough. The Universe series is pretty good.
Ugh, not the Hitlery Channel...my history prof has colleagues that do work for them, he's been begging them to quit. Apparently all they do is edit the shit out of the interviews and raid old theatres for costumes.
Quote from: Rev. What's-His-Name? on November 29, 2010, 03:45:22 PM
I actually watched a bit of one of the Ancient Aliens episodes. It centered around evidence of Aliens mining for gold way back before humans were mining. It was pretty goofy.
The History Channel does have a few jewels in the rough. The Universe series is pretty good.
It is, and that's how I found out cool things like there being liquid metallic hydrogen in Jupiter's core.
That said though, History Channel seems to be plagued with Zecharia Sitchin/2012/Nostradamus stuff. You'd think that aliens would have better shit to take from us than gold. Like, you know, uranium or petroleum, rare earth metals...
...maybe that's why they're rare! :eek:
I forgot about Naked Archaeologist too...
Not only is he not naked, but he focuses on confirming Biblical accounts.
The History Channel is plagued with shit that is ENTERTAINING, not informative. They feel like they do their job by making sure that the rednecks watching it can at least learn SOMETHING, even if it's about Hitler's underwear.
Quote from: Doktor Blight on November 29, 2010, 03:51:07 PM
I forgot about Naked Archaeologist too...
Not only is he not naked, but he focuses on confirming Biblical accounts.
That show makes General Stuart cry.
I do love Zahi Hawass though. That man is the epitome of a cranky archaeologist. He must hate being involved with Chasing Mummies since the actors they got for the fellows drive me batshit (and clearly him as well), but they really do find some cool shit.
Quote from: Suu on November 29, 2010, 04:00:11 PM
That show makes General Stuart cry.
I do love Zahi Hawass though. That man is the epitome of a cranky archaeologist. He must hate being involved with Chasing Mummies since the actors they got for the fellows drive me batshit (and clearly him as well), but they really do find some cool shit.
Hawass was always a cool bastard in my book. Never watched Chasing Mummies but I might have to check it out now.
Quote from: Doktor Blight on November 29, 2010, 04:02:13 PM
Hawass was always a cool bastard in my book. Never watched Chasing Mummies but I might have to check it out now.
He's for real. He's HATES the show, and you can see it every time he chastises the living shit out of someone. I just did some due diligence and according to the History Channel forums, he's likely to not do another season. I can't say that I blame him. They would shoot something like 20 hours of work a week, and then cut it down to almost nothing, and all the dramatic shit that happened that wasn't even relevant. Why the show picked 3 whiny Canadian students as his interns, I have no clue. (They all go to McGill.)
Quote from: Suu on November 29, 2010, 04:15:42 PM
He's for real. He's HATES the show, and you can see it every time he chastises the living shit out of someone. I just did some due diligence and according to the History Channel forums, he's likely to not do another season. I can't say that I blame him. They would shoot something like 20 hours of work a week, and then cut it down to almost nothing, and all the dramatic shit that happened that wasn't even relevant. Why the show picked 3 whiny Canadian students as his interns, I have no clue. (They all go to McGill.)
Must be very frustrating for him. The problem is is that History Channel is more for entertainment than information. People don't like information. It's not interesting enough for them. They need the drama to go along with it.
Did you see the show he did in which he did find Queen Hatshepsut in a completely random mummy within the Cairo Museum, even though they had to do all that excavating in the Valley of the Kings? Yeah...That took something like 7 years worth of work, and they boiled it down to a 2 hour special. ~_~
Nevermind, it was Discovery Channel...same shit, less drama. Definitely worth a watch though. It was freaking cool how they did it.
http://www.drhawass.com/events/quest-hatshepsut-discovering-mummy-egypts-greatest-female-pharaoh
Quote from: Suu on November 29, 2010, 04:38:09 PM
Nevermind, it was Discovery Channel...same shit, less drama. Definitely worth a watch though. It was freaking cool how they did it.
http://www.drhawass.com/events/quest-hatshepsut-discovering-mummy-egypts-greatest-female-pharaoh
Thanks Suu!
I only remember one specific special with Dr. Hawass, and if I recall, it was excavating the Tomb of Osiris, which was kinda cool. I think it was live, so they had to cut it short, but it was a nice touch.
-Memory may be fuzzy. This was in the late 90s.
I think GS said that one of his professors worked with Dr. Hawass...and that he really is a cantankerous egotistical know-it-all...but that he has a total right to be. He really is that brilliant.
Quote from: Suu on November 29, 2010, 04:49:41 PM
I think GS said that one of his professors worked with Dr. Hawass...and that he really is a cantankerous egotistical know-it-all...but that he has a total right to be. He really is that brilliant.
That makes me like him more. :D
Quote from: Suu on November 29, 2010, 04:32:57 PM
Did you see the show he did in which he did find Queen Hatshepsut in a completely random mummy within the Cairo Museum, even though they had to do all that excavating in the Valley of the Kings? Yeah...That took something like 7 years worth of work, and they boiled it down to a 2 hour special. ~_~
I don't think I'd want to watch a seven year special.
(http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_1H-ny1S9pRs/TASGXh7t71I/AAAAAAAAAl0/GiLwnWTHuHo/s1600/Hitler+with+Alien+UFO+VRIL+Haunebu+WW2+Nazi.jpg)
Fucking greys. Don't do that.
:argh!:
We had UKTV History Channel, but they didn't seem to realise that quite a lot of UK History happened before 1939, and after 1945.
Quote from: BadBeast on November 30, 2010, 08:11:36 AM
We had UKTV History Channel, but they didn't seem to realise that quite a lot of UK History happened before 1939, and after 1945.
Well, you guys were pretty uninteresting between 1814 and 1914, since you weren't involved in any American wars and such. Maybe if you guys picked a side in the Civil War, you would have more history.
Blight,
-Going with the prevailing American thought that history is a list of wars involving the US starting from 1492.
Quote from: Doktor Blight on November 30, 2010, 08:27:57 AM
Well, you guys were pretty uninteresting between 1814 and 1914, since you weren't involved in any American wars and such. Maybe if you guys picked a side in the Civil War, you would have more history.
Blight,
-Going with the prevailing American thought that history is a list of wars involving the US starting from 1492.
We'd already 'picked sides' in a Civil War, and that didn't really work out, because we ended up with Cromwell. And if we'd picked sides in your little fracas, it wouldn't have been a Civil War, would it?
Quote from: BadBeast on November 30, 2010, 08:37:01 AM
We'd already 'picked sides' in a Civil War, and that didn't really work out, because we ended up with Cromwell. And if we'd picked sides in your little fracas, it wouldn't have been a Civil War, would it?
Your Civil War counts as an American war, since parts of the US were British colonies at the time.
Also, our Civil War being called a Civil War is a matter of perspective. Suthnuhs call it the War of Northern Aggression. I'm ok with calling it the War of Southern Failure/the American War/the Confederate War/Yankee-Dixie Throwdown. If you got involved we could have called it Embarassing British Loss War III. Doesn't matter. The Empire didn't get involved and was therefore irrelevant to world history at the time :lulz:
We were far too busy exploiting the more civilised parts of the Empire to be bothered about a few ex-colonials squabbling between themselves. Like you say, irrelevant.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wWF3S9OgQho
Quote from: BadBeast on November 30, 2010, 08:48:52 AM
We were far too busy exploiting the more civilised parts of the Empire to be bothered about a few ex-colonials squabbling between themselves. Like you say, irrelevant.
Are you implying that Canada, Australia and Ireland were more civilized? :lulz:
Quote from: Doktor Blight on November 30, 2010, 08:52:42 AM
Are you implying that Canada, Australia and Ireland were more civilized? :lulz:
I wasn't, but now you mention it, yeah. I was thinking more India and South Africa.
Quote from: BadBeast on November 30, 2010, 08:55:11 AM
I wasn't, but now you mention it, yeah. I was thinking more India and South Africa.
INJUH! THE JEWEL IN THE CROWN, I SAY!
OK, I'm better now.
Firstly, yes, I agree with whoever it was who said the History Channel was definitely trying to catch the 2012/Anunnaki/Reptilian Shapeshifter demographic. Having done my socioLOLogy field work amongst such tribes, for a number of years, I could hardly deny the markers are all there.
Also, there was actually something potentially interesting in the documentary, which could have led into proper High Wierdness territory...but the History Channel fucked it up (no surprise there). This structure they were looking at in Poland, and the "bell" that accompanied it...well, that is the same structure and device as described in Nick Cook's The Hunt for Zero Point. Cook, as opposed to the people the History Channel is trying to attract is not a crank, but a highly respected journalist working for Jane's Defence News. In his book, he described how he tries to follow the trail of of anti-gravity research through history (finding some very surprising results along the way, as well as some rather scared people) and his journey ends up in that Polish forest, trying to ascertain the purpose of the "Bell".
He never comes to a firm conclusion. But it's a hell of a lot more interesting than where this episode went: "Nazis locked themselves in the Bell and transported themselves through time LOLOLOLOL. We know this is possible because Einstein proved time travel can happen". Except for the fact he didn't, and Nazis discounted Einstein's theories as false "Jewish science", opposed to true "Aryan science" and it being utterly insane, it's a great theory with a lot going for it.
I consider the above post definitive proof that Cain should be writing documentaries for the History Channel.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD on November 30, 2010, 02:35:45 PM
I consider the above post definitive proof that Cain should be writing documentaries for the History Channel.
This. I would watch.
To be honest, if I could make a comfortable living off making up bullshit about Nazis, I'd do it as well.
Research is hard. Throwing together some conspiratainment program is much easier.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD on November 30, 2010, 02:35:45 PM
I consider the above post definitive proof that Cain should be has been writing documentaries fictionmentaries for the History Channel.
fixt :D
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FJ8KleL4fS4
Quote from: Suu on November 30, 2010, 03:01:41 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FJ8KleL4fS4
:mittens:
I fucking love Whitest Kids U Know...they give hope to bleak American sketch comedy.
Staying home from work and guess what's on History Channel right now?
The Templar Code!
I assume this does not deal with the rules and regulations which surrounded a Templar's conduct on and off the battlefield, in religion and in commerce?
Quote from: Cain on November 30, 2010, 05:02:43 PM
I assume this does not deal with the rules and regulations which surrounded a Templar's conduct on and off the battlefield, in religion and in commerce?
What? No. What the fuck is that shit. This was about using their seekrit simbles to find their buried treasure, which may or may not include the Holy Grail!
It just ended though and they now have a show on about Air Force 1
Is that a documentary about the time when Harrison Ford was President and Air Force One was stormed by Kazakh terrorists, led by Gary Oldman?
Quote from: Cain on November 30, 2010, 05:17:20 PM
Is that a documentary about the time when Harrison Ford was President and Air Force One was stormed by Kazakh terrorists, led by Gary Oldman?
:lulz:
No, no, this one is a episode of Modern Marvels, a show I usually can't be bothered with.
However, there is a two hour show on at 2:00 called Mysteries of the Freemasons.
I think that I'm going to look to changing the channel....
THE FREEMASONS ARE A SECRET SOCIETY WHICH REALLY CONTROL THE WORLD. HERE IS A FREEMASON, WHO WILL DENY IT:
Grand Master of the London Lodge: we do not rule the world.
SEE? HIS DENIAL PROVES HIS GUILT. FUCKING FREEMASONS
(incidentally, I would love to see a documentary on P2...but of course, that will never happen. Criminal conspiracies are only safe to document when they're made up bullshit. Real criminal conspiracies tend to actually kill people, which is why no-one does documentaries on them).
Quote from: Doktor Blight on November 30, 2010, 08:43:14 AM
..."Suthnuhs call it the War of Northern Aggression. I'm ok with calling it the War of Southern Failure/the American War/the Confederate War/Yankee-Dixie Throwdown."... :lulz:
Fantastic! :lulz:
Quote from: Cain on November 30, 2010, 05:52:39 PM
THE FREEMASONS ARE A SECRET SOCIETY WHICH REALLY CONTROL THE WORLD. HERE IS A FREEMASON, WHO WILL DENY IT:
Grand Master of the London Lodge: we do not rule the world.
SEE? HIS DENIAL PROVES HIS GUILT. FUCKING FREEMASONS
(incidentally, I would love to see a documentary on P2...but of course, that will never happen. Criminal conspiracies are only safe to document when they're made up bullshit. Real criminal conspiracies tend to actually kill people, which is why no-one does documentaries on them).
Wuzza P2?
Quote from: Xieante Antitheus on November 30, 2010, 06:02:56 PM
Fantastic! :lulz:
Time to change the history books!
P2, also known as Propaganda Due, was a "black" (covert), pseduo-Masonic lodge in Italy, founded by former Blackshirt and unrepentant Fascist Licio Gelli, and implicated in numerous crimes and coverups, such as Vatican banking scandals and the death of an Italian journalist investigating a group linked to them. The membership of P2 was high profile, and included journalists, politicians, businessmen, members of the armed forces and intelligence services, and one Silvio Berlusconi.
P2 also had links to Latin America, where its members there were frequently among the far-right and neofascist military members implicated in the Southern Cone's "dirty wars" to suppress communism, trade unions and democracy in general.
It sounds like something out of a Ludlum or Dan Brown novel, but unfortunately it was very real. Italian police raided Gelli's villa in 1981, and found a membership list. In 1982, while searching his daughter's suitcase at Rome's Fiumicino Airport, they found a false bottom, and within it a document calling for the overthrow of the Italian Constitution, repression of Communists and trade unions, as well as consolidation of the media. The document suggested that 30 to 40 billion lire, would be needed.
I was thinking, if we got Dan Brown interested in P2, he might want to write his next book about it, get too close, and actually get killed.
Quote from: Cain on November 30, 2010, 06:41:32 PM
P2, also known as Propaganda Due, was a "black" (covert), pseduo-Masonic lodge in Italy, founded by former Blackshirt and unrepentant Fascist Licio Gelli, and implicated in numerous crimes and coverups, such as Vatican banking scandals and the death of an Italian journalist investigating a group linked to them. The membership of P2 was high profile, and included journalists, politicians, businessmen, members of the armed forces and intelligence services, and one Silvio Berlusconi.
P2 also had links to Latin America, where its members there were frequently among the far-right and neofascist military members implicated in the Southern Cone's "dirty wars" to suppress communism, trade unions and democracy in general.
It sounds like something out of a Ludlum or Dan Brown novel, but unfortunately it was very real. Italian police raided Gelli's villa in 1981, and found a membership list. In 1982, while searching his daughter's suitcase at Rome's Fiumicino Airport, they found a false bottom, and within it a document calling for the overthrow of the Italian Constitution, repression of Communists and trade unions, as well as consolidation of the media. The document suggested that 30 to 40 billion lire, would be needed.
Damn. Will have to look more into that one.
RAW had a lot of information in his Cosmic Trigger books, and it was cross-referenced almost everywhere in Everything is Under Control.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD on November 30, 2010, 06:47:42 PM
RAW had a lot of information in his Cosmic Trigger books, and it was cross-referenced almost everywhere in Everything is Under Control.
The only RAW I've read was Illuminatus!
How can you Kill Yr Idols if you don't research them first?
Using the encyclopedia anyone can edit!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Propaganda_Due
Quote from: LMNO, PhD on November 30, 2010, 06:53:57 PM
How can you Kill Yr Idols if you don't research them first?
With a half-informed and indifferent attitude, of course!
Quote from: LMNO, PhD on November 30, 2010, 06:53:57 PM
How can you Kill Yr Idols if you don't research them first?
With an impact weapon of suitably large proportions.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD on November 30, 2010, 06:53:57 PM
How can you Kill Yr Idols if you don't research them first?
Ask them to autograph your copy of "Catcher in the Rye" (or other suitably innocuous book) and while they are
distracted with being an Idol, shoot them.
Speaking of the Yankee-Dixie Throwdown...
Celebrating Secession Without the Slaves
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/11/30/us/30confed.html?_r=1&ref=us
The south celebrates the civil war by pretending their secession from the states happened joyously.
And slavery had nothing to do with it...
Slavery didn't have everything to do with it anyway.
-Suu
History major. Industry professional. Do not question. Also: Drunk.
Oh that I know, but discrediting it almost completely?
Almost like when I was in Germany, and the info the tour guides throw your way regarding the 1940's.
Understandably there are things better off left unsaid, but wow.
History shouldn't be based on where your from and up for that much interpretation. Either it happened or it didn't.
Tainted.
Quote from: Doktor Blight on November 30, 2010, 08:27:57 AM
Quote from: BadBeast on November 30, 2010, 08:11:36 AM
We had UKTV History Channel, but they didn't seem to realise that quite a lot of UK History happened before 1939, and after 1945.
Well, you guys were pretty uninteresting between 1814 and 1914, since you weren't involved in any American wars and such. Maybe if you guys picked a side in the Civil War, you would have more history.
Blight,
-Going with the prevailing American thought that history is a list of wars involving the US starting from 1492.
Wow, I should bump "Paynes List of Things" then.
I accidentally History'ed all over it.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD on November 30, 2010, 06:45:43 PM
I was thinking, if we got Dan Brown interested in P2, he might want to write his next book about it, get too close, and actually get killed.
Wouldn't have to even go as far as that.. Just spread rumours in the right places that he's researching P2 for his new book.
Called "Calvi's Noose" :lulz:
One of our public broadcasting organizations (yes we even have a multi-party system for TV) did a documentary series on the history of Europe, I heard it's pretty good and downloaded the eps but I still need to watch it.
Six episodes so far are available with English subtitles:
http://weblogs.vpro.nl/ineuropa/2010/01/22/6-episodes-with-english-subtitles/
Quote from: The Spagifex Maximus on December 01, 2010, 06:16:45 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on November 30, 2010, 08:27:57 AM
Quote from: BadBeast on November 30, 2010, 08:11:36 AM
We had UKTV History Channel, but they didn't seem to realise that quite a lot of UK History happened before 1939, and after 1945.
Well, you guys were pretty uninteresting between 1814 and 1914, since you weren't involved in any American wars and such. Maybe if you guys picked a side in the Civil War, you would have more history.
Blight,
-Going with the prevailing American thought that history is a list of wars involving the US starting from 1492.
Wow, I should bump "Paynes List of Things" then.
I accidentally History'ed all over it.
It's more a joking commentary of your average American's historical knowledge which tends to be Amerocentric and full of gaps. My guess it goes something like this:
Some stuff happened, sometimes God was involved
Romans
Jesus
Christianity
Crusades
Columbus
American Revolution
Civil War
World War I
Great Depression
World War II
Korean War
Nam
Reagan
Gulf War
Clinton
Terrorism
Socialism
2012
Jesus
:lulz: :horrormirth: :lulz:
Quote from: BadBeast on December 01, 2010, 07:09:36 AM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD on November 30, 2010, 06:45:43 PM
I was thinking, if we got Dan Brown interested in P2, he might want to write his next book about it, get too close, and actually get killed.
Wouldn't have to even go as far as that.. Just spread rumours in the right places that he's researching P2 for his new book.
Called "Calvi's Noose" :lulz:
Not a Sicilian necktie?
Actually, according to most history and education experts, the only country with a more insanely insular and nation-centric view of teaching history than the USA is....Britain.
Norman Davies makes quite a deal of this in the intro to his History of Europe. He points out that despite the notable failings of the Soviet Union education system (Vulgar Marxist Five Stage View of History, horribly chauvinistic etc) their history lessons were actually amazing, and would cover European, American, Central Asian, Chinese, African and SE Asian/Australasian history, often in quite some depth.
In the UK you get to do the Romans (in Britain), Tudors, Stuarts, Normans, Industrial Revolution, WWI, WWII (the Blitz and evacuation...not actually anything happening in Europe) and then....history ends.
If you're lucky, you may get the occasional module on the French Revolution, or the Ancient Greeks. But you probably wont, especially given how the cirriculum has now changed to "All Literarcy and Maths, all the time". It's gotten to the point that we're actually incorporating vast elements of the history requirements into Literacy and Maths (write a comparative essay on Roman and Celtic warriors...do these sums written in Roman numerals) simply because there isn't the time for it.
Quote from: Cain on December 01, 2010, 12:19:04 PM
Actually, according to most history and education experts, the only country with a more insanely insular and nation-centric view of teaching history than the USA is....Britain.
Norman Davies makes quite a deal of this in the intro to his History of Europe. He points out that despite the notable failings of the Soviet Union education system (Vulgar Marxist Five Stage View of History, horribly chauvinistic etc) their history lessons were actually amazing, and would cover European, American, Central Asian, Chinese, African and SE Asian/Australasian history, often in quite some depth.
In the UK you get to do the Romans (in Britain), Tudors, Stuarts, Normans, Industrial Revolution, WWI, WWII (the Blitz and evacuation...not actually anything happening in Europe) and then....history ends.
If you're lucky, you may get the occasional module on the French Revolution, or the Ancient Greeks. But you probably wont, especially given how the cirriculum has now changed to "All Literarcy and Maths, all the time". It's gotten to the point that we're actually incorporating vast elements of the history requirements into Literacy and Maths (write a comparative essay on Roman and Celtic warriors...do these sums written in Roman numerals) simply because there isn't the time for it.
Well, that explains where we get our own historical attitudes from. Over here we cover the French Revolution in no great detail, mainly because it was a democratic revolution occurring around the same time as ours and was somewhat relevant to our own history, but, kinda like in your model, we get most of the info from reading Tale of Two Cities. Greeks are covered a little more over here.
My history teachers in high school were pretty good, but the school I went to was an exam school (a public school that you can get into by having a sufficiently high score on a standardized test. I understand they're a peculiar and fairly unheard of phenomenon elsewhere in the US) that had Latin as mandatory course from grades 7-11, with an option for a classical Greek elective in your senior year. That said, the only history courses I recall having are Ancient History (spent a lot of time on Greece and Rome, some time on Egypt and Persia, 1 week on Mesopotamia, and touching on other civilizations at the time) and American History. I'm fairly sure I took World History but I don't remember it, and I know we didn't cover Medieval/Renaissance History at all, except in a vague proto-American history sort of way.
Quote from: Doktor Blight on December 01, 2010, 11:21:44 AM
Quote from: The Spagifex Maximus on December 01, 2010, 06:16:45 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on November 30, 2010, 08:27:57 AM
Quote from: BadBeast on November 30, 2010, 08:11:36 AM
We had UKTV History Channel, but they didn't seem to realise that quite a lot of UK History happened before 1939, and after 1945.
Well, you guys were pretty uninteresting between 1814 and 1914, since you weren't involved in any American wars and such. Maybe if you guys picked a side in the Civil War, you would have more history.
Blight,
-Going with the prevailing American thought that history is a list of wars involving the US starting from 1492.
Wow, I should bump "Paynes List of Things" then.
I accidentally History'ed all over it.
It's more a joking commentary of your average American's historical knowledge which tends to be Amerocentric and full of gaps. My guess it goes something like this:
Some stuff happened, sometimes God was involved
Romans
Jesus
Christianity
Crusades
Columbus
American Revolution
Civil War
World War I
Great Depression
World War II
Korean War
Nam
Reagan
Gulf War
Clinton
Terrorism
Socialism
2012
Jesus
:lulz: :horrormirth: :lulz:
Quote from: Suu on May 15, 2009, 03:09:06 PM
Addendum:
This isn't pointing the finger at anyone on this board, as I consider you all intellectual equals. But I've decided to summarize how I think American history must be actually taught right now:
In the beginning, there was Columbus, he was the only one who found America. Ever.
Spanish guys come over, kill Montezuma, and that's why you get diarrhea when you visit Mexico.
Pilgrims are really nice guys and they eat turkey with Indians.
The British are bad, and tax tea, so Paul Revere rides and tells people to fight.
The Revolutionary War The War Against England
George Washington is the first president.
We fight another war against England, but we'll skip that, and talk about the French giving us the Statue of Liberty
Something boring happens...oh right, the Industrial Revolution
Lincoln is elected President, slavery is bad.
The Civil War The War Against Slavery
Something something about carpetbaggers, scalawags, and the railroad. John Wayne movies take place here.
People in Europe are fighting, let's ignore them for a while.
World War I The War for the United States to look Super Cool in the End
Flappers tape their boobs down!
Prohibition happens, but people still make their own alcohol. It's cool to drink, even when you're not allowed.
The gaudy flappers spend all the money, country is broke, everyone is depressed.
Hitler is evil.
Mussolini is evil.
Japan is VERY evil.
World War II The War Against Nazis
Russia is communist! OSHI-
Communism is bad!
Korea is splitting up because of Communism! Let's stop it!
The Korean War The First War Against Communism
Oh fuck shit damn, Communism!
Did I mention Communism was bad? Don't let the Russians do anything! OH FUCK!
Communism in Vietnam?! FUCK!
The Vietnam War (Don't call it a war! We didn't win!) The Second War Against Communism
--Fill in the blanks with "We didn't Start the Fire by Billy Joel"--
Iraq, Iran, Syria, Lybia...shit, if you are an Islamic country, we hate you! Goddamn. You better not be communist! If Russia is helping you we'll bust a cap! GODDAMN!
Wut? Communism over? Booo hisss....need...new...target...
Oh there goes those fucking Islamic countries again, damn!
The Persian Gulf War George Bush Sr. and the not-so-Last Crusade
OJ Simpson's glove didn't fit.
Bill Clinton got a blowjob.
OH SHIT FUCK DAMN TERRORISTS HIT THE TWIN TOWERS OH WTF WE ARE INVINCIBLE!
The War on Terrorism
While we're over there...
The Iraq War George Bush Jr. And the Last Crusade
STOP EVERYTHING: BLACK PRESIDENT ELECTED
History over.
Now class, that's all you need to know for now, here are the answers to the standardized test you need to take so you can pass and I can get a raise. Please study these instead of anything else you'll need to know. Thanks.
I had bitchin' history classes. But I also was all AP in high school, and graduated before NCLB.
I did have a biology/origins class error that I brought up yesterday in my Human Origins class, and my prof said that I wasn't the only one.
:lulz:
Oh, also World History = History of Western Civilization
Asia, Africa and South America? Only relevant when white people are involved.
Quote from: Doktor Blight on December 01, 2010, 12:55:26 PM
Oh, also World History = History of Western Civilization
Asia, Africa and South America? Only relevant when white people are involved.
Norman Davies made this point in the above mentioned book as well.
I was also quite lucky in having good history teachers. From what I can recall, all British schools are mandated to teach British (meaning English) history from 1000 AD to 1500 AD, British (meaning English) history from 1500 AD to 1750 AD and British (meaning English) history from 1750 to the Present.
And every school must
watch Schinder's List learn about the Holocaust.
All other modules are optional, and up to the teacher to decide. And since the teacher is, in 99% of cases, a product of the insular British History method, this invariably ends up being a more focused look at the Tudors, Stuarts, Normans, Industrial Revolution or Nazis bombing London.
The two best teachers I had incidentally, well, one of them was actually a Maths teacher most of the time (dual Honours in Maths/History) and the other did Scottish history. This may be coincidence, but I doubt it.
I didn't take History at School, because there was a girl I had a huge crush on who was taking Geography, and you only got the option of one or the other. So I went for the girl, and learned about Ox-bow lakes, and glacial fucking scree. The girl opted out, after two weeks and did Commerce instead, and now I can't even remember what her name was. :x But I can tell Granite from Basalt, and an Island from an Isthmus.
Somehow I learned that the Battle of Clontarf was in 1014 too.
I took both Geography and History.
I couldn't do Art though. Or continue with French.
Quote from: Doktor Blight on December 01, 2010, 12:55:26 PM
Oh, also World History = History of Western Civilization
Asia, Africa and South America? Only relevant when white people are involved.
I had both World History AND Western Civ. I learned about cool exotic places like China and Japan! We get tea from them!
Quote from: BadBeast on December 01, 2010, 01:08:35 PM
I didn't take History at School, because there was a girl I had a huge crush on who was taking Geography, and you only got the option of one or the other. So I went for the girl, and learned about Ox-bow lakes, and glacial fucking scree. The girl opted out, after two weeks and did Commerce instead, and now I can't even remember what her name was. :x But I can tell Granite from Basalt, and an Island from an Isthmus.
Somehow I learned that the Battle of Clontarf was in 1014 too.
I realized Americans suck at geography now because they took Carmen Sandiego off the air.
Quote from: BadBeast on December 01, 2010, 01:08:35 PM
I didn't take History at School, because there was a girl I had a huge crush on who was taking Geography, and you only got the option of one or the other. So I went for the girl, and learned about Ox-bow lakes, and glacial fucking scree. The girl opted out, after two weeks and did Commerce instead, and now I can't even remember what her name was. :x But I can tell Granite from Basalt, and an Island from an Isthmus.
Somehow I learned that the Battle of Clontarf was in 1014 too.
Ah poor Brian Boru, :lulz:
We had the option of more science first for more history later or more history first for more science later. I chose science first and did poorly due to laziness and failing to come up with science projects, tolerating the stench of formalyn and sufficiently understanding mathematics. Apparently my hormones blocked those mental abilities, since I did well with them in college.
I learned History myself, from reading Asterix books, then Slaine comics, then proper History books, Medieval Re-enactment, and watching Sharpe.
Quote from: Suu on December 01, 2010, 01:13:20 PM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on December 01, 2010, 12:55:26 PM
Oh, also World History = History of Western Civilization
Asia, Africa and South America? Only relevant when white people are involved.
I had both World History AND Western Civ. I learned about cool exotic places like China and Japan! We get tea from them!
After Commodore Perry invented them right? :lulz:
Quote from: BadBeast on December 01, 2010, 01:08:35 PM
I didn't take History at School, because there was a girl I had a huge crush on who was taking Geography, and you only got the option of one or the other. So I went for the girl, and learned about Ox-bow lakes, and glacial fucking scree. The girl opted out, after two weeks and did Commerce instead, and now I can't even remember what her name was. :x But I can tell Granite from Basalt, and an Island from an Isthmus.
Somehow I learned that the Battle of Clontarf was in 1014 too.
I realized Americans suck at geography now because they took Carmen Sandiego off the air.
[/quote]
I loved that show. Also I started liking history after playing Where in Time is Carmen Sandiego. Now that was edutainment!
Quote from: Doktor Blight on December 01, 2010, 01:19:56 PM
Quote from: Suu on December 01, 2010, 01:13:20 PM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on December 01, 2010, 12:55:26 PM
Oh, also World History = History of Western Civilization
Asia, Africa and South America? Only relevant when white people are involved.
I had both World History AND Western Civ. I learned about cool exotic places like China and Japan! We get tea from them!
After Commodore Perry invented them right? :lulz:
Believe it or not, I had to do a good deal of work on feudal Japan during the Shogunate. We also read
The Art of War, the
Hou Hanshu, and other cool bits of Chinese literature...and I was in high school. I just never took a real liking to Asian history. Not that is isn't cool, but my focus isn't there.
Quote from: Suu on December 01, 2010, 02:21:02 PM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on December 01, 2010, 01:19:56 PM
Quote from: Suu on December 01, 2010, 01:13:20 PM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on December 01, 2010, 12:55:26 PM
Oh, also World History = History of Western Civilization
Asia, Africa and South America? Only relevant when white people are involved.
I had both World History AND Western Civ. I learned about cool exotic places like China and Japan! We get tea from them!
After Commodore Perry invented them right? :lulz:
Believe it or not, I had to do a good deal of work on feudal Japan during the Shogunate. We also read The Art of War, the Hou Hanshu, and other cool bits of Chinese literature...and I was in high school. I just never took a real liking to Asian history. Not that is isn't cool, but my focus isn't there.
That's pretty cool actually.
My chief area of interest right now is Central Asian history. The Mongol invasions are especially noteworthy, but I don't believe I've even seen most of this in University level history courses.
It's pretty fascinating, but something that isn't widely explored in the Western world. We have the Center for Chinese Studies here at URI, and the main office is actually here at my campus, but again, not my cup of oolong. I may take a class on Japan though if it's offered, because medieval Japan makes medieval Europe look tame.
We have a high school here (maybe just outside of Boston, I don't know) that specializes in East Asian studies, which is interesting. I think it's called the Academy of the Pacific Rim or something like that.
MONGOLS, MOTHERFUCKER!
\
(http://xenohistorian.faithweb.com/russia/italeri-6020-golden-horde.jpg)
Mongols should be the new Spanish Inquisition. No-one will expect them.
The Mongols would fucking ANYTHING. The Mongols are the reason that the Ottomans and Saffavids were such snazzy dressers, too.