Quote from: Nigel on March 23, 2011, 02:36:56 AM
Quote from: navkat on March 23, 2011, 02:14:13 AM
Quote from: pH on March 23, 2011, 01:52:25 AM
I'm just going to jump in to this whole Nigel vs. navkat thing, and navkat, you have talked to Roger right? How did/do you survive Roger if Nigel's vague prodding bothers you?
I get Roger. If you notice, he's not ever really nasty about anything, just takes a superior stance and simply asserts that you are wrong (even when he's fucking with you). He pokes and trolls but he does it with class.
I don't have class.
But I'm right, and it pisses people off. I am also five feet tall and have hair that white people love to pet. For reasons unknown, in person my essential and perfect adorable righteousness makes people laugh and love me. Online, it fills them with rage and hate. Luckily, that makes me laugh, when I'm not seeing red.
My best friend is Jewish, also I have a cute dog.
I'm sorry I don't understand why people want to move to New Orleans and Portland.
Quote from: Nigel on March 23, 2011, 03:08:33 AM
If I could have your phone number, I would call you and say "I don't understand why people are like, oh hey a flood plain! I'd like to move there!"
it would be different, I swear to god. There is a reason people want me to like, be their minister and marry them and shit. Mostly people say that I am "nurturing". Also I might be kind of a bitch at times, but that's not really my predominant trait. I am starting to become kind of distressed about my online bitch persona, because seriously, I am every bit as much of a Horrible Bastard in person, but for some reason people find it fucking cuddly or some shit. ECH and Net and TGRR and Freeky and EOT can vouch for this. EOT has seen probably the worst sides of me; he's seen me be a real bitch, and cry, and lose my shit.
I think I'm kind of drunk; dammit. I gave up not drinking and now it only takes about four ounces of wine to fuck me up hard.
Also ECH should become a coroner, because that would fucking rock hard. Dude.
I had to split this bc I couldn't bear to jack ECH's thread again.
Okay. Perhaps we're off on the wrong foot. Maybe I misunderstood.
I must admit: your dog is adorable and I am now curious about your hair.
Ok, I have to say that Nigel has a point, in that it doesn't make much logical sense to choose to move to a place that has a history of natural disasters, a poor economy, corrupt politicians, and whose already poor geography is being eroded away.
But I suppose that's not Navkat's point. There are places on this earth that have a sort of psychological and emotional resonance with some people. A subset of those people are enamored to the point that they want to always be there, in spite of the logical reasons not to live there.
I suppose if you have no emotional affinity for any environment or external circumstances, you should be living in Minneapolis or Milwaukee (http://www.forbes.com/2009/10/26/safest-cities-ten-lifestyle-real-estate-metros-msa.html). But most people I know have some sort of resonance with some type of city or town, even if they can't agree (the NYC/LA debates, for example).
The people who choose to move to NO or Portland must have made the personal decision that their emotional connection and enjoyment with living in the city the city overcomes the logical reasons not to.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD on March 23, 2011, 01:22:23 PM
Ok, I have to say that Nigel has a point, in that it doesn't make much logical sense to choose to move to a place that has a history of natural disasters, a poor economy, corrupt politicians, and whose already poor geography is being eroded away.
But I suppose that's not Navkat's point. There are places on this earth that have a sort of psychological and emotional resonance with some people. A subset of those people are enamored to the point that they want to always be there, in spite of the logical reasons not to live there.
I suppose if you have no emotional affinity for any environment or external circumstances, you should be living in Minneapolis or Milwaukee (http://www.forbes.com/2009/10/26/safest-cities-ten-lifestyle-real-estate-metros-msa.html). But most people I know have some sort of resonance with some type of city or town, even if they can't agree (the NYC/LA debates, for example).
The people who choose to move to NO or Portland must have made the personal decision that their emotional connection and enjoyment with living in the city the city overcomes the logical reasons not to.
Yeah, man. It's like: I
know New Orleans has a lot of problems. Corruption, shitty levee engineering, NOPD, you name it. But I
love her. I'm willing to get in there, roll my sleeves up and be part of the solution. I can't say that about any other city in which I've lived (and I've tried on a
lot).
I can't imagine being the kind of person who would be satisfied living in a safe, clean little Mall of America town for my whole life. Give me dirty music, crazy characters, guerrilla street art and hot, sex-filled air on the verge of existential orgasm in dark corners against the background sounds of nightclubs like aging, drunken whores, vomiting feather boas and tawdry lace onto the sidewalks.
I love Portland, so I get that. But I'm FROM Portland; this corrupt, doomed little fucker of a city is in my veins. Like New Orleans, I am incredulous that anyone would move here on purpose, yet they do in droves. I'm not judging or condemning anyone for this, I am simply failing to understand why.
I look at this place and think, fuck, it's pretty, but like many pretty things IT'S A BAD IDEA.
BTW I have met many people from Minneapolis and Milwaukee who have intense love for those places. Mostly they are assholes though.
If we ever meet in person you can touch my hair.
:)
Quote from: Nigel on March 23, 2011, 02:55:02 PM
I love Portland, so I get that. But I'm FROM Portland; this corrupt, doomed little fucker of a city is in my veins. Like New Orleans, I am incredulous that anyone would move here on purpose, yet they do in droves. I'm not judging or condemning anyone for this, I am simply failing to understand why.
I look at this place and think, fuck, it's pretty, but like many pretty things IT'S A BAD IDEA.
BTW I have met many people from Minneapolis and Milwaukee who have intense love for those places. Mostly they are assholes though.
I haven't met anyone from Milwaukee, but I have met some great people who love Minneapolis. They're just a different kind of great people than the sort that love New Orleans or Portland. More Garrison Keilor esque
Minny is actually a pretty awesome city (it's the vast suburban wasteland that surrounds it for 50 miles in every direction that is indescribably awful), it just has the most suck-ass climate in the lower 48 for 3 months of the year. Good restaurant scene, KILLER hip-hop scene, artsy, lots of parks and greenspace, and there's still no shortage of crime-ridden shitholes if that's your thing. I guarantee that nobody from Forbes magazine spent so much as a single minute in the Phillips neighborhood.
oh, and I have never been anywhere else in the US that has that high a concentration of insanely hot girls who seem to have no moral imperative against casual sex.
Quote from: Rip City Hustle on March 23, 2011, 11:19:19 PM
Minny is actually a pretty awesome city (it's the vast suburban wasteland that surrounds it for 50 miles in every direction that is indescribably awful), it just has the most suck-ass climate in the lower 48 for 3 months of the year. Good restaurant scene, KILLER hip-hop scene, artsy, lots of parks and greenspace, and there's still no shortage of crime-ridden shitholes if that's your thing. I guarantee that nobody from Forbes magazine spent so much as a single minute in the Phillips neighborhood.
oh, and I have never been anywhere else in the US that has that high a concentration of insanely hot girls who seem to have no moral imperative against casual sex.
That might explain why the guys I've met from there are bitter about Portland.
:lulz:
I moved here from RURAL EASTERN MAINE and if I were single, I'd be bitter about Portland too. :lulz:
ECH,
would run through the 'couve like bad curry, though
Okay, listen here, jackasses...
...If provoked, Nigel will tear your collective faces off and wear them as merkins. When this happens, do not come to The Good Reverend Roger spraying blood from your bare skull, for ye have been warned, and besides that shit makes me giggle. It's only by her good graces that anyone in California gets to live anyfuckingway, and the day of the Fatal Anal Bead approaches. You're all fucking doomed, and you have nobody to blame but yourselves.
HEAR ME, O PD, AND TREMBLE! THE DARK EMPRESS COMES BEARING AN APPLE-CORING TOOL AND A TOILET PLUNGER, AND HER LANGUAGE CONTAINS NO WORD FOR "MERCY"!
Invest in 3/4" PVC pipe now. You'll need it when she's collected your prostates.
That is all. You may now return to your tiresome crawling across the face of my planet.
:lulz:
This makes me happy. Thank you, TGRR!
Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:36:48 AM
:lulz:
This makes me happy. Thank you, TGRR!
No problem. I am simply well-versed in the art of survival. This is not my first barbeque. No. I have dwelt for many decades with the sheer horror of living directly below Portland, and knowing that my face is still attached to my skull by way of placing offerings at the wall so that the dread shadow of the Dark Empress shall pass over me, and land on some random dumbfuck. Now opies want to make Portland come closer to them, when it's plain as day that Nigel will make a motherfucker bounce.
I can only hope that the pills can drown out the screaming and the horrible meaty noises, and that the inevitable tide of orphans washes up on someone else's doorstep.
OH, YE WRETCHES! DO YE NOT KNOW THE ENORMITY OF YOUR SIN? ARE YE NOT COGNIZANT OF THE AWFUL PUNISHMENTS THAT AWAIT THEE? SHALL YE PLUG THY IMPENDING HORRIBLE FISTULAS WITH CRUMPLED UP NEWSPAPERS? SHALL YE GROW BACK THY MANGLED BITS?
REPENT! REPENT WHILE THERE'S STILL TIME, LEST THE PIPE CLAIM THEE!
TGRR,
Feeling particularly old testamenty tonight.
Loving this. :)
Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:55:54 AM
Loving this. :)
Bad day today. Now I want to summon the terror in the night, paint blood all over my door jam, and laugh as the gentiles next door are hauled off by the angel of deff.
TGRR,
Wearing a long fake beard while typing this, and howling obscenities at those miserable fucking golfers who bombard the new digs 9 times a week.
Angel of deff costume in the making.
Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 02:36:52 AM
Angel of deff costume in the making.
wooowooo!
I shall now tear up a bedsheet and go into full-out prophet mode.
I can feel the Holiness welling up from my abused testicles.
TGRR,
Can type in tongues.
YES
UNNNG...I CAN FEEL IT WORKING IT'S WAY UP THROUGH MY LOWER GI TRACT.
BRB
We in Tucson await the prophecy, the return of Dark Empress Nigel. We prepare, we anoint ourselves with bourbon that's already been through a cow. We drink vile Death Coffee and snap up pills like Hungry Hungry Hippos. We heed the rantings of the homeless people in the legal district, and we await that glorious day...
...That day when Nigel shall return, and set things aright. She shall fashion a scourge of testicles and cleanse the temple, trodding the sinners under flip-flops wreathed in HOLY FIRE. She shall show us where the gerbil goes, and shall sweetly sing to us as she shovels the unworthy into the TEP boiler. Angels of unearthly geometry shall be her vanguard, and the blasphemers shall be dropped into sinkholes. They shall cry for death and death shall not find them.
Then shall we celebrate, then shall we staple ourselves to each other and run naked through Central Filth, braying our victory cries to the heathen. Then shall we scour Reid Park of the Pagan menace. Then shall we observe the tribulations of the non-believers, as they are infested with horror-crabs and encrusted with ass-boils that speak and thus recount their many sins.
And there will be a great crying out, many shall wail their love for Nigel, but it shall indeed be too late. For is it not written that You Had Your Chance, Motherfuckers? Truly, fresh fears shall be inscribed on horror's scrolls for thee.
GET THEE HENCE, SINNERS! FLEE TO NEW MEXICO! FLEE EVEN UNTO TEXAS! BUT CAN YOU FLEE THE DIVINE WRATH THAT YE HAVE EARNED WITH THY INEQUITY AND LACK OF PROPER NAUGHTY BUSINESS? NAY, THY SHALL BE DRAGGED BACK FOR AN ACCOUNTING, KICKING AND SCREAMING OUT TO THE HEAVENS. AND THE HEAVENS SHALL NOT ANSWER, BECAUSE THE CELL SERVICE IS OUT. AGAIN.
And on that day, pray indeed for a "Tucson Moment", for it is a far kinder fate than thou deserve.
Amen.
I like this kind of Gospel.
Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 02:44:41 PM
I like this kind of Gospel.
Somehow, the regular kind doesn't
fit, here.
I am currently working on a list of the PD saints, and the particulars of their Holy Dominions.
So far, I have:
ECH
Nigel
LMNO
Iason
Just remember, Maine is mine below the Kennebec!
:argh!:
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 24, 2011, 01:31:34 AM
It's only by her good graces that anyone in California gets to live anyfuckingway, and the day of the Fatal Anal Bead approaches.
:crankey:
Quote from: Jenne on March 24, 2011, 05:24:32 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 24, 2011, 01:31:34 AM
It's only by her good graces that anyone in California gets to live anyfuckingway, and the day of the Fatal Anal Bead approaches.
:crankey:
It's da troof. You live in the shadow of her mighty arsenal. She can drop tha funk bomb any time she wants to.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 24, 2011, 06:45:33 PM
Quote from: Jenne on March 24, 2011, 05:24:32 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 24, 2011, 01:31:34 AM
It's only by her good graces that anyone in California gets to live anyfuckingway, and the day of the Fatal Anal Bead approaches.
:crankey:
It's da troof. You live in the shadow of her mighty arsenal. She can drop tha funk bomb any time she wants to.
Agree to disagree.
Quote from: Jenne on March 24, 2011, 06:57:17 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 24, 2011, 06:45:33 PM
Quote from: Jenne on March 24, 2011, 05:24:32 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 24, 2011, 01:31:34 AM
It's only by her good graces that anyone in California gets to live anyfuckingway, and the day of the Fatal Anal Bead approaches.
:crankey:
It's da troof. You live in the shadow of her mighty arsenal. She can drop tha funk bomb any time she wants to.
Agree to disagree.
Okay, but I'm tellin' ya, if anyone's gonna get funked up, it's gonna be CA.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 24, 2011, 06:58:47 PM
Quote from: Jenne on March 24, 2011, 06:57:17 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 24, 2011, 06:45:33 PM
Quote from: Jenne on March 24, 2011, 05:24:32 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 24, 2011, 01:31:34 AM
It's only by her good graces that anyone in California gets to live anyfuckingway, and the day of the Fatal Anal Bead approaches.
:crankey:
It's da troof. You live in the shadow of her mighty arsenal. She can drop tha funk bomb any time she wants to.
Agree to disagree.
Okay, but I'm tellin' ya, if anyone's gonna get funked up, it's gonna be CA.
Yeah, but that's with or with out Nigel's supreme awesomeness. Besides, she COULD blow East, not South. There's no telling, if you want to know the truth. Shit, she could send Alty into orbit.
Quote from: Jenne on March 24, 2011, 07:02:18 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 24, 2011, 06:58:47 PM
Quote from: Jenne on March 24, 2011, 06:57:17 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 24, 2011, 06:45:33 PM
Quote from: Jenne on March 24, 2011, 05:24:32 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 24, 2011, 01:31:34 AM
It's only by her good graces that anyone in California gets to live anyfuckingway, and the day of the Fatal Anal Bead approaches.
:crankey:
It's da troof. You live in the shadow of her mighty arsenal. She can drop tha funk bomb any time she wants to.
Agree to disagree.
Okay, but I'm tellin' ya, if anyone's gonna get funked up, it's gonna be CA.
Yeah, but that's with or with out Nigel's supreme awesomeness. Besides, she COULD blow East, not South. There's no telling, if you want to know the truth. Shit, she could send Alty into orbit.
There's been no "North" or "South" in California since the end of the 70s.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 24, 2011, 07:04:27 PM
Quote from: Jenne on March 24, 2011, 07:02:18 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 24, 2011, 06:58:47 PM
Quote from: Jenne on March 24, 2011, 06:57:17 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 24, 2011, 06:45:33 PM
Quote from: Jenne on March 24, 2011, 05:24:32 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 24, 2011, 01:31:34 AM
It's only by her good graces that anyone in California gets to live anyfuckingway, and the day of the Fatal Anal Bead approaches.
:crankey:
It's da troof. You live in the shadow of her mighty arsenal. She can drop tha funk bomb any time she wants to.
Agree to disagree.
Okay, but I'm tellin' ya, if anyone's gonna get funked up, it's gonna be CA.
Yeah, but that's with or with out Nigel's supreme awesomeness. Besides, she COULD blow East, not South. There's no telling, if you want to know the truth. Shit, she could send Alty into orbit.
There's been no "North" or "South" in California since the end of the 70s.
:lulz: :crankey: :lulz: :x
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 24, 2011, 07:04:27 PM
Quote from: Jenne on March 24, 2011, 07:02:18 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 24, 2011, 06:58:47 PM
Quote from: Jenne on March 24, 2011, 06:57:17 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 24, 2011, 06:45:33 PM
Quote from: Jenne on March 24, 2011, 05:24:32 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 24, 2011, 01:31:34 AM
It's only by her good graces that anyone in California gets to live anyfuckingway, and the day of the Fatal Anal Bead approaches.
:crankey:
It's da troof. You live in the shadow of her mighty arsenal. She can drop tha funk bomb any time she wants to.
Agree to disagree.
Okay, but I'm tellin' ya, if anyone's gonna get funked up, it's gonna be CA.
Yeah, but that's with or with out Nigel's supreme awesomeness. Besides, she COULD blow East, not South. There's no telling, if you want to know the truth. Shit, she could send Alty into orbit.
There's been no "North" or "South" in California since the end of the 70s.
I'm not sure what this means, but I am sure it makes me :argh!: :lulz::crankey: at once.
I am intrigued by this "Alty in orbit" concept.
Quote from: Nigel on March 25, 2011, 12:56:27 AM
I am intrigued by this "Alty in orbit" concept.
It's simple, really. He's already on the tip of the planet. Just flick him off.