Is your messiah's birthday. Please to be giving your tribute.
Happy birthday!
Happy birthday!
May the candles on your cake
Burn like cities in your wake
Happy birthday!
I DEMAND SACRIFICE.
I used 1% milk in my cereal this morning instead of whole milk.[/1st world sacrifice]
Quote from: The Reverend What's-His-Name? Experience on October 19, 2011, 02:14:42 PM
I used 1% milk in my cereal this morning instead of whole milk.[/1st world sacrifice]
THIS IS ACCEPTABLE.
The HAPPIEST of Birthdays to you!!
I would offer my first born but you'd only end up cursing me when he ate your house. :sad:
I will raise a glass to you my next visit to the bar!
Have a wonderful day and I hope it is the first of many in a great year for you!!!
I am using nasty powdered creamer in my coffee, instead of yummy flavored Bailey's creamer.
And, in your honor, I will make yummy baked goods, and feed them to my yoga class tonight, thereby rendering any weight loss from the exercise moot.
(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_lNDfVtyhO7A/Sw_9z4QdlPI/AAAAAAAAATw/XyP9IrG4x7M/s1600/PBF032-Todays_My_Birthday.png)
HAPPY BIRTHDAY PAYNE
IN HONOR OF YOUR BIRTHDAY, I WILL WASH MY HAIR WITH BEES
(http://i209.photobucket.com/albums/bb163/wompcabal/paynebday.png)
In honour of your birthday I fapped to this picture of Fanny Craddock
(http://www.bbc.co.uk/southerncounties/content/images/2008/11/26/fanny_craddock_203_203x152.jpg)
:fap: :fap: :fap: :fap: :fap: :fap:
I have a hangover type headache, but my sacrifice will be to not take asprin. Or something. Happy barfday.
Happy of Happiest, Oh Reverend my Reverend.
I sacrificed more of my sanity. It's not like I had much to begin with.
Happy Birthday!
I will hunt down a messiah from another religion and throw pig's blood at him/her in your honor.
Quote from: Alty on October 19, 2011, 04:29:27 PM
Happy Birthday!
I will hunt down a messiah from another religion and throw pig's his/her blood at him/her an pig in your honor.
This is Payne's birthday, not fucking Gandhi's :argh!:
I sacrificed you a text message!
And I will also DRINK BEER IN YOUR HONOUR TONIGHT
I ain't sacrificing shit for you.
Happy birthday, asshole.
Happy birthday Payne! Today I will not drink any alcohol or smoke any cigarettes, in honor of Your Messianic Holiness.
Quote from: Nigel on October 19, 2011, 04:50:17 PM
Happy birthday Payne! Today I will not drink any alcohol or smoke any cigarettes, in honor of Your Messianic Holiness.
I will totally make good for both of these, also in honor of your mesjogge holiness!
Quote from: Khara on October 19, 2011, 02:29:59 PM
The HAPPIEST of Birthdays to you!!
I would offer my first born but you'd only end up cursing me when he ate your house. :sad:
I will raise a glass to you my next visit to the bar!
Have a wonderful day and I hope it is the first of many in a great year for you!!!
UNNACCEPTABLE
Quote from: Luna on October 19, 2011, 02:33:21 PM
I am using nasty powdered creamer in my coffee, instead of yummy flavored Bailey's creamer.
And, in your honor, I will make yummy baked goods, and feed them to my yoga class tonight, thereby rendering any weight loss from the exercise moot.
ACCEPTABLE, ON BOTH COUNTS
Quote from: Cramulus on October 19, 2011, 02:45:31 PM
IN HONOR OF YOUR BIRTHDAY, I WILL WASH MY HAIR WITH BEES
ACCEPTABLE, IF YOU MEAN PUBIC HAIR
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on October 19, 2011, 03:04:20 PM
In honour of your birthday I fapped to this picture of Fanny Craddock
(http://www.bbc.co.uk/southerncounties/content/images/2008/11/26/fanny_craddock_203_203x152.jpg)
:fap: :fap: :fap: :fap: :fap: :fap:
ACCEPTABLE
Quote from: Science me, babby on October 19, 2011, 03:08:43 PM
I have a hangover type headache, but my sacrifice will be to not take asprin. Or something. Happy barfday.
:argh!: UNNACCEPTABLE
NEEDS MOAR WHISKY
Quote from: Jenne on October 19, 2011, 03:20:20 PM
Happy of Happiest, Oh Reverend my Reverend.
I sacrificed more of my sanity. It's not like I had much to begin with.
GIVEN CIRCUMSTANCES, ACCEPTABLE.
DO BETTER NEXT YEAR.
Happy Birthday, Payne.
My sacrifice will be something else, entirely.
Quote from: Alty on October 19, 2011, 04:29:27 PM
Happy Birthday!
I will hunt down a messiah from another religion and throw pig's blood at him/her in your honor.
UNNACCEPTABLE
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on October 19, 2011, 04:32:39 PM
Quote from: Alty on October 19, 2011, 04:29:27 PM
Happy Birthday!
I will hunt down a messiah from another religion and throw pig's his/her blood at him/her an pig in your honor.
ACCEPTABLE
Quote from: Triple Zero on October 19, 2011, 04:43:59 PM
I sacrificed you a text message!
And I will also DRINK BEER IN YOUR HONOUR TONIGHT
WHISKY IS ACCEPTABLE
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on October 19, 2011, 04:45:00 PM
I ain't sacrificing shit for you.
Happy birthday, asshole.
ACCEPTABLE.
P.S. UPPERDECKED THE ONLY TOILET IN YOUR CORNER OF HELL. ENJOY.
Quote from: Nigel on October 19, 2011, 04:50:17 PM
Happy birthday Payne! Today I will not drink any alcohol or smoke any cigarettes, in honor of Your Messianic Holiness.
.... ACCEPTABLE?
Quote from: Doktor Howl on October 19, 2011, 05:19:43 PM
Happy Birthday, Payne.
My sacrifice will be something else, entirely.
I WILL WITHOLD MY FEARSOME AND TERRIBLE JUDGEMENT.
Happy Birthday, Payne! In your honor, I will donate any roadkill I see today to a local charity of a random drifter's choosing (next step: finding a drifter), and when Kai arrives we will perform all manner of depraved fertility rituals to celebrate your holiness.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Payne on October 19, 2011, 05:24:19 PM
Quote from: Nigel on October 19, 2011, 04:50:17 PM
Happy birthday Payne! Today I will not drink any alcohol or smoke any cigarettes, in honor of Your Messianic Holiness.
.... ACCEPTABLE?
IT'S A SACRIFICE.
Also if I keep drinking and smoking the way I have the last four days, I will probably die.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Payne on October 19, 2011, 05:19:21 PM
Quote from: Jenne on October 19, 2011, 03:20:20 PM
Happy of Happiest, Oh Reverend my Reverend.
I sacrificed more of my sanity. It's not like I had much to begin with.
GIVEN CIRCUMSTANCES, ACCEPTABLE.
DO BETTER NEXT YEAR.
Aye Aye Revrnd Cap'n Sir.
Today I will take a giant shit and not pretend it's on your face.
FUCK YOU BIRTHDAY MESSIAH
Happy Birthday Payne. You may well be living in England, but we must never lose sight of the fact you're still a Woady Nac MacFeegle. So in light of this most gracious state, this Caledonian heritage that still curdles the blood of the Saxon with it's Kilted cries of "Stitch that Jimmy!", here's one of the greatest Scotsmen in living memory to turn up and bug the shit out of the neighbours with.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n-nosdSTqEE&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nTIox95OxTc&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=id5rdQA0jlo&feature=related
I was planning to not drink anything between now and bed but in your honour i will snort vodka.
This gonna hurt.
FUCK THAT HURT!!!
Clears up the sinuses though...
I AM DRINKING A SHOT OF FERMENTED MT DEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Quote from: Donald Coyote on October 19, 2011, 11:18:17 PM
I AM DRINKING A SHOT OF FERMENTED MT DEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
... HOW TO FERMENT MT DEW??
Quote from: Luna on October 19, 2011, 11:19:36 PM
Quote from: Donald Coyote on October 19, 2011, 11:18:17 PM
I AM DRINKING A SHOT OF FERMENTED MT DEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
... HOW TO FERMENT MT DEW??
1. BOIL IT!!!!
2. ADD YEAST!!!!!
3. ???
4. PROFIT??
Quote from: Doktor Phox on October 19, 2011, 05:28:52 PM
Happy Birthday, Payne! In your honor, I will donate any roadkill I see today to a local charity of a random drifter's choosing (next step: finding a drifter), and when Kai arrives we will perform all manner of depraved fertility rituals to celebrate your holiness.
REQUIRES MORE DOUBLE ENDED RACCOON SHAPED DILDOS
Quote from: The Good Reverend Payne on October 19, 2011, 11:38:40 PM
Quote from: Doktor Phox on October 19, 2011, 05:28:52 PM
Happy Birthday, Payne! In your honor, I will donate any roadkill I see today to a local charity of a random drifter's choosing (next step: finding a drifter), and when Kai arrives we will perform all manner of depraved fertility rituals to celebrate your holiness.
REQUIRES MORE DOUBLE ENDED RACCOON SHAPED DILDOS
Can do. :lol:
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on October 19, 2011, 08:37:28 PM
Today I will take a giant shit and not pretend it's on your face.
FUCK YOU BIRTHDAY MESSIAH
ACCEPTABLE.
P.S. I HAVE A CERTAIN "WATER SLIDE" YOU SHOULD TRY IN MY AFTERLIFE. I SWEAR IT ISN'T THE OUTFLOW FROM THE SEWER.
Quote from: BadBeast on October 19, 2011, 08:53:38 PM
Happy Birthday Payne. You may well be living in England, but we must never lose sight of the fact you're still a Woady Nac MacFeegle. So in light of this most gracious state, this Caledonian heritage that still curdles the blood of the Saxon with it's Kilted cries of "Stitch that Jimmy!", here's one of the greatest Scotsmen in living memory to turn up and bug the shit out of the neighbours with.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n-nosdSTqEE&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nTIox95OxTc&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=id5rdQA0jlo&feature=related
YOUR MUSICS WOKE UP MY FLATMATES ON A WEDNESDAY NIGHT.
ACCEPTABLE.
Quote from: Regret on October 19, 2011, 09:11:16 PM
FUCK THAT HURT!!!
Clears up the sinuses though...
UNNACCEPTABLE.
I'M SURE YOU KNOW WHY.
ASSHOLE.
Quote from: Donald Coyote on October 19, 2011, 11:26:08 PM
Quote from: Luna on October 19, 2011, 11:19:36 PM
Quote from: Donald Coyote on October 19, 2011, 11:18:17 PM
I AM DRINKING A SHOT OF FERMENTED MT DEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
... HOW TO FERMENT MT DEW??
1. BOIL IT!!!!
2. ADD YEAST!!!!!
3. ???
4. PROFIT??
MY FRIEND THE GOOD DEACON MATTHEW OF CARLTON WOULD AGREE.
ACCEPTABLE.
In your honor I will swallow a small dog live and whole, eject the result into orbit, and as the first to discover this astronomical object I will name it Granny Payne's Wednesday Surprise.
Quote from: Egad Zounds on October 19, 2011, 11:56:47 PM
In your honor I will swallow a small dog live and whole, eject the result into orbit, and as the first to discover this astronomical object I will name it Granny Payne's Wednesday Surprise.
BIRTHDAY OVER, APPLICATIONS TO JOIN MY UNHOLY HEAVENLY CHOIR NO LONGER ACCEPTED, TRY NEXT YEAR ASSHOLE.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Payne on October 20, 2011, 09:07:55 AM
Quote from: Egad Zounds on October 19, 2011, 11:56:47 PM
In your honor I will swallow a small dog live and whole, eject the result into orbit, and as the first to discover this astronomical object I will name it Granny Payne's Wednesday Surprise.
BIRTHDAY OVER, APPLICATIONS TO JOIN MY UNHOLY HEAVENLY CHOIR NO LONGER ACCEPTED, TRY NEXT YEAR ASSHOLE.
MOTHERFUCKER
I WILL GET INTO THAT CHOIR IF I HAVE TO STAB MY WAY IN
Quote from: Egad Zounds on October 20, 2011, 09:08:56 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Payne on October 20, 2011, 09:07:55 AM
Quote from: Egad Zounds on October 19, 2011, 11:56:47 PM
In your honor I will swallow a small dog live and whole, eject the result into orbit, and as the first to discover this astronomical object I will name it Granny Payne's Wednesday Surprise.
BIRTHDAY OVER, APPLICATIONS TO JOIN MY UNHOLY HEAVENLY CHOIR NO LONGER ACCEPTED, TRY NEXT YEAR ASSHOLE.
MOTHERFUCKER
I WILL GET INTO THAT CHOIR IF I HAVE TO STAB MY WAY IN
LOL
I totally missed this thread, but it seems that I accidentally drank a beer in Payne's honor yesterday.
I also have sacrificed doing necessary laundry as of Tuesday, due to a broken washing machine. :sad:
Happy belated Payne!
Quote from: Nph. Twid. on October 20, 2011, 05:43:33 PM
Happy belated Payne!
BAM! PRE-EMPTIVE TWID!
I WENT THERE!
Quote from: Cainad on October 20, 2011, 12:57:06 PM
I totally missed this thread, but it seems that I accidentally drank a beer in Payne's honor yesterday.
I also have sacrificed doing necessary laundry as of Tuesday, due to a broken washing machine. :sad:
Broken washing machines are a sign of devilish possession.
I recommend exorcism via the Rite of Glenfiddich.
Quote from: Cainad on October 20, 2011, 12:57:06 PM
I totally missed this thread, but it seems that I accidentally drank a beer in Payne's honor yesterday.
Me too, except instead of beer it was half a bottle of gin.
I sacrificed my entire day instead of catching up on school work.
Quote from: Net on October 20, 2011, 07:29:12 PM
Quote from: Cainad on October 20, 2011, 12:57:06 PM
I totally missed this thread, but it seems that I accidentally drank a beer in Payne's honor yesterday.
Me too, except instead of beer it was half a bottle of gin.
I sacrificed my entire day instead of catching up on school work.
That smells of victory.