The safety guy and I have discussed your idea to place a man inside reactor 107 to observe the GIGANTIC GODDAMN AGITATOR starting up in the same tank.
We have concluded that you are in fact senile, or just profoundly stupid. We have also talked about it, and decided to tattoo "I'M A FUCKING MORON" on your head when you get loaded at this year's Christmas party.
There is a reason you don't manage employees. For that very same reason, your input on how I manage MY employees is neither solicited or accepted, except as a source of exceptional hilarity.
Yours Truly,
Commander Ringmeat.
I lost my shit at the word "observe."
OH MY GOD :lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
How can anybody be that stupid? I don't even know what those words MEAN but I can tell that the answer is no.
Quote from: Nigel on April 05, 2012, 06:15:06 PM
OH MY GOD :lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
How can anybody be that stupid? I don't even know what those words MEAN but I can tell that the answer is no.
It's a double-walled 5000 gallon tank, with a gigantic mixer blade in it.
The mixer blade is acting weird.
Filthy assistant wanted someone to stand in the tank while the mixer blade started up, to watch and see what it's doing. Let me say that again: In addition to the obvious danger, the blade (paddle, really) is ACTING WEIRD.
And there's only 19 inches between the paddle and the wall, and the blade turns at 100 RPM, with about 6000 foot pounds of force.
This is what I have to work with.
Just the term "reactor" makes me flash on Silkwood.
Even if it's a gigantic fucked up wobbly paddle that turns at 100 RPM with 6000 lbs. of force and nothing radioactive, the gist is there. :horrormirth:
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on April 05, 2012, 06:22:26 PM
Just the term "reactor" makes me flash on Silkwood.
Even if it's a gigantic fucked up wobbly paddle that turns at 100 RPM with 6000 lbs. of force and nothing radioactive, the gist is there. :horrormirth:
Yeah, it's a chemical reactor, not a nuclear reactor.
that's like putting your head in a washingmachine to figure out why it's making funny noises.
Quote from: Guru Coyote on April 05, 2012, 07:38:34 PM
that's like putting your head in a washingmachine to figure out why it's making funny noises.
If the washing machine was full of caltrops.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 05, 2012, 05:47:58 PM
place a man inside reactor 107 to observe the GIGANTIC GODDAMN AGITATOR starting up in the same tank.
What.
So... did he volunteer to be that guy?
Quote from: Emo Howard on April 05, 2012, 08:28:07 PM
So... did he volunteer to be that guy?
No.
But to his credit, he did rant about how the guys who laughed when he brought the idea up were just "lazy" and "didn't want to work".
I haven't actually seen someone go into a spittle-flying rage in a long time.
It's been a good day.
What the hell? :lulz: I feel like you should start up a quotes list - "Stupid shit Filthy Assistant Says" - and post it for all to see, with regular updates.
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on April 05, 2012, 08:52:01 PM
What the hell? :lulz: I feel like you should start up a quotes list - "Stupid shit Filthy Assistant Says" - and post it for all to see, with regular updates.
AND THEN DOK HAD CARPAL TUNNEL SYNDROME.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 05, 2012, 08:52:54 PM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on April 05, 2012, 08:52:01 PM
What the hell? :lulz: I feel like you should start up a quotes list - "Stupid shit Filthy Assistant Says" - and post it for all to see, with regular updates.
AND THEN DOK HAD CARPAL TUNNEL SYNDROME.
Just from thinking about it. :lulz:
Was this guy born naturally stupid, or did he have learn it?
Is it horrible that I started grinning at the title, chucking at "inside the reactor," and laughing loud enough to frighten my seatmate on the bus at "agitator?"
So it didnt really occur to him that an expendable camcoder of sorts would be suffiecient to see what was going on instead of suggesting something that could lead to a wrongful death suit?
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on April 05, 2012, 09:33:25 PM
So it didnt really occur to him that an expendable camcoder of sorts would be suffiecient to see what was going on instead of suggesting something that could lead to a wrongful death suit?
Please. Camcorders cost MONEY. Exploding an employee is plugging a payroll leak.
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on April 05, 2012, 09:33:25 PM
So it didnt really occur to him that an expendable camcoder of sorts would be suffiecient to see what was going on instead of suggesting something that could lead to a wrongful death suit?
Thing is, he's really, really stupid.
Quote from: Luna on April 05, 2012, 09:34:25 PM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on April 05, 2012, 09:33:25 PM
So it didnt really occur to him that an expendable camcoder of sorts would be suffiecient to see what was going on instead of suggesting something that could lead to a wrongful death suit?
Please. Camcorders cost MONEY. Exploding an employee is plugging a payroll leak.
This is my favorite human resources management expression of the year!
Well, at the end of the day, Filthy Assistant threw a complete fucking wobbler, and acted so irrationally that I have banned him from the production portion of the refinery.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 06, 2012, 12:56:32 AM
Well, at the end of the day, Filthy Assistant threw a complete fucking wobbler, and acted so irrationally that I have banned him from the production portion of the refinery.
:lulz:
Details?
Quote from: Emo Howard on April 05, 2012, 09:02:19 PM
Was this guy born naturally stupid, or did he have learn it?
I do believe that level of stupidity is something one has to
work at. Good thing he's not
lazy.
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on April 06, 2012, 02:09:44 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 06, 2012, 12:56:32 AM
Well, at the end of the day, Filthy Assistant threw a complete fucking wobbler, and acted so irrationally that I have banned him from the production portion of the refinery.
:lulz:
Details?
Not sure. He just blew the fuck up in the end of the day meeting.
I caught maybe one word out of three.
Ye BALLS. :eek:
... :lulz:
That's Filthy Assistant and Ernie in the same week. :lulz:
Oh my great goodness! I would just like to follow Dok around at work taking notes on the conversations he has, and using it to write an employee training manual for the plant he works at. :lulz:
I'm still not entirely convinced all these people are not some of Roger's Alters. I think they should all make accounts and argue with each other on here. :)
Quote from: navkat on April 06, 2012, 08:23:33 PM
I'm still not entirely convinced all these people are not some of Roger's Alters. I think they should all make accounts and argue with each other on here. :)
Yeah. I'm dumb as a bag of anvils, and I don't give a fuck what happens to employees.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 06, 2012, 09:45:25 PM
Quote from: navkat on April 06, 2012, 08:23:33 PM
I'm still not entirely convinced all these people are not some of Roger's Alters. I think they should all make accounts and argue with each other on here. :)
Yeah. I'm dumb as a bag of anvils, and I don't give a fuck what happens to employees.
STOPPPPPPP! Jenn = Joking again.
Incidentally, the problem became self-evident today on startup, when the 200 pound baffle broke loose and ricocheted around the tank, denting the 1/5" thick double hull in 25 places. The reactor is a total loss.
Had we been dumb enough to follow Larry's line of thinking, the person inside the reactor would have been turned into a red greasy spot.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 07, 2012, 02:07:39 AM
Incidentally, the problem became self-evident today on startup, when the 200 pound baffle broke loose and ricocheted around the tank, denting the 1/5" thick double hull in 25 places. The reactor is a total loss.
Had we been dumb enough to follow Larry's line of thinking, the person inside the reactor would have been turned into a red greasy spot.
Jesus fuck.
Point out to anybody with a fucking brain that if people hadn't had to spend hours convincing Filthy Fucking Stupid Assistant not to fucking murder somebody, maybe that time could have been spent on figuring out the fucking problem and MAYBE avoided totaling the reactor.
Glad nobody got hurt.
Naw. This was so weird and unpredictable that my boss isn't even pissed off. Just sort of stunned.
Me, I expect this shit because I am a rationalist, and therefore believe in gremlins.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 07, 2012, 02:07:39 AM
Incidentally, the problem became self-evident today on startup, when the 200 pound baffle broke loose and ricocheted around the tank, denting the 1/5" thick double hull in 25 places. The reactor is a total loss.
Had we been dumb enough to follow Larry's line of thinking, the person inside the reactor would have been turned into a red greasy spot.
Wowwww...
Yep. Dok had a hand in keeping someone from being squeegeed off the wall into a closed casket.
I hope they fucking appreciate that.
I don't undersand what would ever have been up for debate when someone goes "Hey, let's put a dude in there!"
I am continually shocked by the fact that the people who say these types of things don't spend their downtime with a sack of birdseed and an anvil, chasing a roadrunner around the desert.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 07, 2012, 02:07:39 AM
Incidentally, the problem became self-evident today on startup, when the 200 pound baffle broke loose and ricocheted around the tank, denting the 1/5" thick double hull in 25 places. The reactor is a total loss.
Had we been dumb enough to follow Larry's line of thinking, the person inside the reactor would have been turned into a red greasy spot.
I'm sure he would have argued that they weren't actually dead, just very lazy.
Quote from: navkat on April 07, 2012, 09:42:39 PM
I don't undersand what would ever have been up for debate when someone goes "Hey, let's put a dude in there!"
I am continually shocked by the fact that the people who say these types of things don't spend their downtime with a sack of birdseed and an anvil, chasing a roadrunner around the desert.
Roadrunner was a dick, and coyote was a genius who was hungry and had horrendous luck.
Holy shit, Roger. Please tell me you are documenting this shit and have hopes of getting this guy fired and or reduced to mop jockey?
This reminds me of Paolo Bacigalupi's short story Pump six. Where a mediocre sewage pump maintenance engineer slowly comes to the conclusion that he is the smartest man on earth because everyone else somehow became retarded. He has the kind of colleagues that think the proper response to a total failure of one of the 10 sewage pumps failing is to have a toiletpaper fight in the cafeteria.
He later tries to contact the manufacturers of the pumps for parts but they went bankrupt 30 years ago, they had made their pumps too good, no one who bought one needed any repair or replacements for the next 60 years. (Pump 6 is now over 100 years old)
So he does what any man out of his depth does, he tries to delegate. Sadly, noone at the university is answering and when he goes there in person he sees all students fucking on the lawn, half the buildings are boarded up and there is a lock on the library. No one is teaching, no one is studying and there is only one professors widow left guarding the library against students looking for stuff to burn.
His other short stories are even more shocking and or depressing. Great writer.