It's really getting on my ass. This fucking place breaks down non-fucking-stop, and it's getting to the point where PILLS HERE doesn't do much good. The streets are full of freaks, the cops just sit in their cars and shake, junkie angels and hipsters just curl up on the sidewalk and fucking die. The new mayor just walks around looking like someone killed his dog (Thought it would all be easy answers, didn't you, you fucking teabagger swine? Ha! HAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHA!).
I'm so fucking stressed out that my lips cramped. I wasn't aware that was even possible...And I am far from the most stressed out person I know (most of my coworkers are protected by their own stupidity). Just watch the scum crawl, schlepping their way to the "cool" club, confident in the power of a pocket full of cocaine to make the young girls forget that the creeper is 45 years old.
Just watch the busses go by, loaded stem to stern with people that would be considered clincally insane anywhere else. A city full of damage cases, from the outright insane, to people in their 30s who think a fur suit is a perfectly reasonable thing to spend the rent money on.
Just watch the detective cry into his beer. Just watch the firemen, the only functional public service we have, falling asleep on the job out of sheer overwork. Just watch the one nurse in the ER who's hard-bitten enough not to go to pieces when the baby in one of the ER stalls dies, and the rest of the staff all collapse into tears in frustration.
Just watch the grinnning bald guy gobbling pills and driving like an asshole through the legal district at ridiculous speeds. No, better not watch him, he always turns all weird at exactly the wrong moment.
Well, okay, but I warned you.
Observe the grinning bald guy as he approaches crush depth, as his limbs randomly twitch, and his face turns red with rage over seemingly inconsequential things, like his cell phone beginning to ring. Observe as the pressure at this depth causes him to begin to crumple and spring leaks, rivets flying around inside like in that one scene in Das Boot.
No, scratch all that. Everything's fine. How could anything be better, in this best of all possible cities, in this best of all possible worlds?
Okay for something or other,
Dok
Jesus doesn't save here. There's no time. He just leaves the tops off of dumpsters, and then comes and collects what gathers up while he's busy up in Portland. Sometimes he really gets busy and the dumpster people arrive first, and the departed get to go to the landfill for their eternal reward.
It's fucking party time for the guys in Tucson. Have a ball, ya'll. Just don't let 'em whisper in your ear, because you don't need to hear that manner of shit before you die. Just get back to digging, cause that grave ain't gonna dig itself, and it has to be big enough for you and all your stuff.
Hahaha! :lol:
There's nobody out there. :x
IS THIS THING WORKING? *tap, tap*
It seems to me that a change is needed. Something. Anything.
DO YOU FEEL THE PAYNE?
It was never like this back in Chicago. Or on the East Coast.
In all of those places, you felt like someone was driving the train, instead of piling in the clubcar, drunkenly playing rummy while the engine churned away, with the throttle tied down with rope.
And that's what it's like here. Like there's nobody running shit. Like a runaway car, and you're stuck in the back seat. Something's going to happen eventually, and you are powerless to stop it. And the other assholes next to you keep saying how nice it all is, as long as you stay on the North side.
Look, you fuckers, you gotta wear comfortable shoes, and practice deep breathing. Oxygenate that blood...So when Tucson comes for YOU, you can outrun all your buddies. It's your only hope. It probably won't save you, but at least it will get you last.
And smile. All the time. It goes for the ones that have forgotten their Happy Thoughts™.
I like to counteract the feeling of my body telling me to set downtown on fire by drinking a quarter bottle of jack daniels and watching 30 Rock for four consecutive hours until I fall asleep crying.
I take special comfort in knowing our city council "doesn't" have people thrown out onto the streets for practicing free speech, our schools "do" have respect for all religions and ethnicities, and the police "don't" pull over and pull guns on minorities for having legally obtained a gun permit.
Because that would be unfortunate.
My bad, I had the window up and got called away.
On the East Coast, they at least pretend to give a shit whether people live or die. This can translate to stupid shit like writing tickets to people who don't wear bicycle helmets, but I never minded when I was up there because where I'm from and where I am now, nobody gives a shit and they're being pretty overt about trying to pare down the population.
I haven't lived in enough places to see where the public safety thing stops and the WE'RE ALL ON A RUNAWAY 18 WHEELER WITH NO BRAKES WOOHOO GIMME A BUD LIGHT CLAMATO HERP DERP starts, but I suspect it's kaput long before a person reaches Ohio.
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on April 09, 2012, 06:41:48 PM
I haven't lived in enough places to see where the public safety thing stops and the WE'RE ALL ON A RUNAWAY 18 WHEELER WITH NO BRAKES WOOHOO GIMME A BUD LIGHT CLAMATO HERP DERP starts, but I suspect it's kaput long before a person reaches Ohio.
And by the time it reaches here, it's weaving from lane to lane, looking for "a moment". And then the EMTs all stand around trying to light cigarettes, while some fat & vapid "stress counselor" tries to shove unicorns and pink monkeys up their arses.
Where the fuck do people like that come from? Who the fuck smiles and tells you "life happens" a dozen feet from a mangled sausage creature that used to be a pretty 18 year old girl? WHO THE FUCK ARE THESE PEOPLE? What in the FUCK is wrong with their heads? There's a time and a place for everything, but RIGHT THERE, RIGHT THEN, is NOT the CORRECT FUCKING TIME.
And then Oysters comes along with a short term solution, one that I have tried on many occasions. Problem is, the crud the next day is worse, because you can't staple a grin on your face and look like your mask didn't crack, and it gives the crew the jimjams.
Also, we don't have race problems, at least not like other cities do. We're all in the shit together, and race is a pretty minor issue when Mother Tucson comes jitterbugging along, singing old Leonard Cohen tunes and kicking peoples' heads in.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 09, 2012, 06:48:21 PM
And then Oysters comes along with a short term solution, one that I have tried on many occasions. Problem is, the crud the next day is worse, because you can't staple a grin on your face and look like your mask didn't crack, and it gives the crew the jimjams.
Psh. You and your relentless logic.
YOU'RE GETTING IN THE WAY OF YOUR OWN SMILE, DOK! You just gotta buckle down and chase that unicorn across that crowded highway, high on life and new age scripture!
Try some of our locally grown "fresh" florida oranges. The people on the commerical seem all sorts of smiley.
Quote from: Oysters Rockefeller on April 09, 2012, 06:56:55 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 09, 2012, 06:48:21 PM
And then Oysters comes along with a short term solution, one that I have tried on many occasions. Problem is, the crud the next day is worse, because you can't staple a grin on your face and look like your mask didn't crack, and it gives the crew the jimjams.
Psh. You and your relentless logic.
YOU'RE GETTING IN THE WAY OF YOUR OWN SMILE, DOK! You just gotta buckle down and chase that unicorn across that crowded highway, high on life and new age scripture!
Try some of our locally grown "fresh" florida oranges. The people on the commerical seem all sorts of smiley.
This is one reason I don't watch TV. Everyone on TV seems so fucking unreasonably HAPPY. Especially the freaks they have as anchors on the news. BIG FUCKING SMILE while we talk about the world economy shitting while bankers steal everything that isn't nailed down and half the shit that IS...And aren't they just CHEERFUL BASTARDS under that solemn look while they talk about random shootings?
If I had my way, all of those cocksuckers AND the bastards that write commercials would be dropped off at 4th & I-10 and left there to die in whichever gruesome manner the locals think of first.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 09, 2012, 07:01:09 PM
Quote from: Oysters Rockefeller on April 09, 2012, 06:56:55 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 09, 2012, 06:48:21 PM
And then Oysters comes along with a short term solution, one that I have tried on many occasions. Problem is, the crud the next day is worse, because you can't staple a grin on your face and look like your mask didn't crack, and it gives the crew the jimjams.
Psh. You and your relentless logic.
YOU'RE GETTING IN THE WAY OF YOUR OWN SMILE, DOK! You just gotta buckle down and chase that unicorn across that crowded highway, high on life and new age scripture!
Try some of our locally grown "fresh" florida oranges. The people on the commerical seem all sorts of smiley.
This is one reason I don't watch TV. Everyone on TV seems so fucking unreasonably HAPPY. Especially the freaks they have as anchors on the news. BIG FUCKING SMILE while we talk about the world economy shitting while bankers steal everything that isn't nailed down and half the shit that IS...And aren't they just CHEERFUL BASTARDS under that solemn look while they talk about random shootings?
If I had my way, all of those cocksuckers AND the bastards that write commercials would be dropped off at 4th & I-10 and left there to die in whichever gruesome manner the locals think of first.
...her body was found in six different areas of the county, and police suspect her father was involved.
In other news, a kitten with a real voice sings happy birthday to her owner!
Quote from: Oysters Rockefeller on April 09, 2012, 07:03:26 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 09, 2012, 07:01:09 PM
Quote from: Oysters Rockefeller on April 09, 2012, 06:56:55 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 09, 2012, 06:48:21 PM
And then Oysters comes along with a short term solution, one that I have tried on many occasions. Problem is, the crud the next day is worse, because you can't staple a grin on your face and look like your mask didn't crack, and it gives the crew the jimjams.
Psh. You and your relentless logic.
YOU'RE GETTING IN THE WAY OF YOUR OWN SMILE, DOK! You just gotta buckle down and chase that unicorn across that crowded highway, high on life and new age scripture!
Try some of our locally grown "fresh" florida oranges. The people on the commerical seem all sorts of smiley.
This is one reason I don't watch TV. Everyone on TV seems so fucking unreasonably HAPPY. Especially the freaks they have as anchors on the news. BIG FUCKING SMILE while we talk about the world economy shitting while bankers steal everything that isn't nailed down and half the shit that IS...And aren't they just CHEERFUL BASTARDS under that solemn look while they talk about random shootings?
If I had my way, all of those cocksuckers AND the bastards that write commercials would be dropped off at 4th & I-10 and left there to die in whichever gruesome manner the locals think of first.
...her body was found in six different areas of the county, and police suspect her father was involved.
In other news, a kitten with a real voice sings happy birthday to her owner!
http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/whistle_past_the_graveyard
Quote from: Oysters Rockefeller on April 09, 2012, 07:03:26 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 09, 2012, 07:01:09 PM
Quote from: Oysters Rockefeller on April 09, 2012, 06:56:55 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 09, 2012, 06:48:21 PM
And then Oysters comes along with a short term solution, one that I have tried on many occasions. Problem is, the crud the next day is worse, because you can't staple a grin on your face and look like your mask didn't crack, and it gives the crew the jimjams.
Psh. You and your relentless logic.
YOU'RE GETTING IN THE WAY OF YOUR OWN SMILE, DOK! You just gotta buckle down and chase that unicorn across that crowded highway, high on life and new age scripture!
Try some of our locally grown "fresh" florida oranges. The people on the commerical seem all sorts of smiley.
This is one reason I don't watch TV. Everyone on TV seems so fucking unreasonably HAPPY. Especially the freaks they have as anchors on the news. BIG FUCKING SMILE while we talk about the world economy shitting while bankers steal everything that isn't nailed down and half the shit that IS...And aren't they just CHEERFUL BASTARDS under that solemn look while they talk about random shootings?
If I had my way, all of those cocksuckers AND the bastards that write commercials would be dropped off at 4th & I-10 and left there to die in whichever gruesome manner the locals think of first.
...her body was found in six different areas of the county, and police suspect her father was involved.
In other news, a kitten with a real voice sings happy birthday to her owner!
:crankey:
The newspaper obits here are bad enough. On some days, they read like the second half of Tacitus'
The Annals of Ancient Rome.
Dok, I can't say I know the runaway train feeling, but I gotta admit that those "life happens" assholes get all up IN my business.
No job, no prospects, and an eviction notice gets your neighbor to pop out his head and say "Ah, tough luck, kid. But that's life."
That French asshole who works at the convenience store you pulled into when your transmission just fucking exploded only clicks his tongue and says "C'est la vie."
Worst of all, when your best friend gets turned into one of those sausage monsters in an incident involving two drunk drivers and running stop signs, and no one gets prosecuted, the best those churchy people down the street can give you is "He's in a better place."
Well, what the fuck is so much better about having your face poorly reconstructed for an open casket wake, and then you get dropped in a dark whole in the ground and chill for the next forever? Why the fuck does life go around blowing up transmissions, and kicking college kids out of their apartments for no good reason aside from the landlord deciding not to extend their lease?
Life is the biggest dick of them all.
Either that, or those people need a good dose of what they call "life".
Love and kisses,
Doktor Phox
Quote from: Doktor M. Phox0 on April 09, 2012, 07:11:14 PM
No job, no prospects, and an eviction notice gets your neighbor to pop out his head and say "Ah, tough luck, kid. But that's life."
"AND HERE'S A FUCKING KICK IN WHAT USED TO BE YOUR GODDAMN TEEF, ASSHOLE! OH, WELL, FUCK...I GUESS LIFE JUST
HAPPENS, RIGHT, YOU GODDAMN PIGFUCKER?"
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 09, 2012, 07:13:33 PM
Quote from: Doktor M. Phox0 on April 09, 2012, 07:11:14 PM
No job, no prospects, and an eviction notice gets your neighbor to pop out his head and say "Ah, tough luck, kid. But that's life."
"AND HERE'S A FUCKING KICK IN WHAT USED TO BE YOUR GODDAMN TEEF, ASSHOLE! OH, WELL, FUCK...I GUESS LIFE JUST HAPPENS, RIGHT, YOU GODDAMN PIGFUCKER?"
This is the correct response, of course. :lulz:
ETA: Stupid comma.
It just occurred to me that my rants have become boring.
Sorry, folks.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 09, 2012, 10:53:48 PM
It just occurred to me that my rants have become boring.
Sorry, folks.
.....??? :sadbanana:
It is when you just want to send the entire department away for two weeks so you can make the improvements needed but you can't because there is quota to consider.
It is when you know where investments need to be made and it would cost less than is made in a day to be set for years but they won't because apparantly more pallet jacks is a ridiculous solution when compared to just throwing more untrained and untrainable labor at it.
It is when replacing the department head is considered a joke to the workers, because we all know why the previous guy left and none of those capable actually want the job.
It is when the three most capable and trustworthy workers are: 1 worker previously removed to another dept. for incompetence, 1 zero-hour contract worker and 1 temp.
When you realize that Dok Howl's rants are the monkeybuggering truth and too painfully accurate to be boring.
The days go fast now. Wasn't always that way. Used to be slow, brain bendingly banal and repetitive. Another stale joke over the water cooler about FRiday not comign fast enough, or almost quitting time.
Now when we get in to start the day it's a minor miracle. FOr the first week or so it was like some fucking charity walk, all hugs and sincerely glad that we didn;t loose anyone to the roads, the roving gangs of crazies, or those fucking wolves (this time). SIncere sad and a moment of silence at break for anyone who didn't make it. OF course that was a month ago. HA, a damn AGE by comparison. Hearing suzie got nipped off by a snipper, or Jose had his Jeep rolled by a land mine got savaged by the coyotes and is trying to call around to get moeny for them to sew the leg they found back on, and we jsut grumble.
Shit, down one more person.....
The clock ticks away the time we're all in a secured position. cement walls, bulletproof windows, and kevlar stapled over the cubilce walls. Then someone found a leopard in the dissused first floor. It got up into the sales department before anyone could do anything. PEggy and Julie each whined over who's turn it was to put an irreplacable 30.06 round through it, until Mike got fed up and poleaxed the thing. Oh, HR had words with him, somethign about a mandatory firearms policy they forgot to tell us about.
Anyways, almost time to go back out. We're down a person in out usual group to make the parking lot run. Bobcats on the roof in ambush, and the wolves know our pattern. TRying not to focus on it or I'll yark again.
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on April 09, 2012, 07:04:49 PM
http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/whistle_past_the_graveyard
Enter: my new favorite phrase.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 09, 2012, 06:25:06 PM
Look, you fuckers, you gotta wear comfortable shoes, and practice deep breathing. Oxygenate that blood...So when Tucson comes for YOU, you can outrun all your buddies. It's your only hope. It probably won't save you, but at least it will get you last.
And smile. All the time. It goes for the ones that have forgotten their Happy Thoughts™.
I don't have to outrun ALL my buddies, just one of them.
Quote from: Doktor M. Phox0 on April 09, 2012, 07:15:48 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 09, 2012, 07:13:33 PM
Quote from: Doktor M. Phox0 on April 09, 2012, 07:11:14 PM
No job, no prospects, and an eviction notice gets your neighbor to pop out his head and say "Ah, tough luck, kid. But that's life."
"AND HERE'S A FUCKING KICK IN WHAT USED TO BE YOUR GODDAMN TEEF, ASSHOLE! OH, WELL, FUCK...I GUESS LIFE JUST HAPPENS, RIGHT, YOU GODDAMN PIGFUCKER?"
This is the correct response, of course. :lulz:
ETA: Stupid comma.
Funny how life never seems to just "happen" to those who are responsible for life "happening" to others.
Also: Phox, you should call me, girl! I can't make it stop but we can cry together!
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on April 10, 2012, 12:08:11 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 09, 2012, 10:53:48 PM
It just occurred to me that my rants have become boring.
Sorry, folks.
.....??? :sadbanana:
I've been preaching when I need to be doktoring.
Quote from: Richter on April 10, 2012, 02:38:48 AM
The days go fast now. Wasn't always that way. Used to be slow, brain bendingly banal and repetitive. Another stale joke over the water cooler about FRiday not comign fast enough, or almost quitting time.
Now when we get in to start the day it's a minor miracle. FOr the first week or so it was like some fucking charity walk, all hugs and sincerely glad that we didn;t loose anyone to the roads, the roving gangs of crazies, or those fucking wolves (this time). SIncere sad and a moment of silence at break for anyone who didn't make it. OF course that was a month ago. HA, a damn AGE by comparison. Hearing suzie got nipped off by a snipper, or Jose had his Jeep rolled by a land mine got savaged by the coyotes and is trying to call around to get moeny for them to sew the leg they found back on, and we jsut grumble.
Shit, down one more person.....
The clock ticks away the time we're all in a secured position. cement walls, bulletproof windows, and kevlar stapled over the cubilce walls. Then someone found a leopard in the dissused first floor. It got up into the sales department before anyone could do anything. PEggy and Julie each whined over who's turn it was to put an irreplacable 30.06 round through it, until Mike got fed up and poleaxed the thing. Oh, HR had words with him, somethign about a mandatory firearms policy they forgot to tell us about.
Anyways, almost time to go back out. We're down a person in out usual group to make the parking lot run. Bobcats on the roof in ambush, and the wolves know our pattern. TRying not to focus on it or I'll yark again.
The fact that I don't get to live in YOUR universe fills me with rage.
Future jabberings will be in Horrorology, where they won't get in the way of things.
In the way of what? */rhetorical*
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on April 10, 2012, 06:00:13 PM
In the way of what? */rhetorical*
DECI4 threads, Hollis Increase threads, and Ain't It Awful. :lulz:
In all seriousness, Doktoring belongs down there. Apple Talk is more like television, these days.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 10, 2012, 06:15:47 PM
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on April 10, 2012, 06:00:13 PM
In the way of what? */rhetorical*
DECI4 threads, Hollis Increase threads, and Ain't It Awful. :lulz:
In all seriousness, Doktoring belongs down there. Apple Talk is more like television, these days.
Television IS horrorology. :horrormirth:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ye7xrN-qxQ8
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on April 10, 2012, 06:21:12 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 10, 2012, 06:15:47 PM
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on April 10, 2012, 06:00:13 PM
In the way of what? */rhetorical*
DECI4 threads, Hollis Increase threads, and Ain't It Awful. :lulz:
In all seriousness, Doktoring belongs down there. Apple Talk is more like television, these days.
Television IS horrorology. :horrormirth:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ye7xrN-qxQ8
My nannywall protects me.
Try it this way http://i524.photobucket.com/albums/cc322/fennario99/n.jpg
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on April 10, 2012, 06:24:07 PM
Try it this way http://i524.photobucket.com/albums/cc322/fennario99/n.jpg
Still safe. :lol:
It's a horse humping a cop while another cop tries to pull him off.
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on April 10, 2012, 06:32:05 PM
It's a horse humping a cop while another cop tries to pull him off.
Pull who off? That's not very clear.
And here, it COULD make all the difference.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 10, 2012, 06:33:07 PM
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on April 10, 2012, 06:32:05 PM
It's a horse humping a cop while another cop tries to pull him off.
Pull who off? That's not very clear.
And here, it COULD make all the difference.
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
Now I have to bleach my brain.
It's another lovely Spring day here in Portland.
I spent most of yesterday taking pictures of spiders down at the Superfund site. Ignoring the condom wrappers and mud-soaked teddy bears.
Quote from: Nigel on April 10, 2012, 09:55:23 PM
It's another lovely Spring day here in Portland.
I spent most of yesterday taking pictures of spiders down at the Superfund site. Ignoring the condom wrappers and mud-soaked teddy bears.
You Portland people have EVERYTHING. :crankey:
All we get is dried coyote poop swirling around in the air.
Quote from: Nigel on April 10, 2012, 09:55:23 PM
It's another lovely Spring day here in Portland.
I spent most of yesterday taking pictures of spiders down at the Superfund site. Ignoring the condom wrappers and mud-soaked teddy bears.
There's something heartbreakingly sad in that...and I feel kind of
violent about it. I can't shake the feeling that someone needs their ass kicked.
It's like a wonderland here
and occasionally you stop to ask yourself, why is everyone so cheerful and POLITE?
Today EOT told me why he does it. Why he's so over-the-top courteous. Why he stops to let pedestrians cross the street, and waves people on when it's not really their turn.
He does it because it enrages everyone around him.
And that, really, pretty much sums up Portland.
Quote from: Nigel on April 12, 2012, 07:03:49 AM
It's like a wonderland here
and occasionally you stop to ask yourself, why is everyone so cheerful and POLITE?
Today EOT told me why he does it. Why he's so over-the-top courteous. Why he stops to let pedestrians cross the street, and waves people on when it's not really their turn.
He does it because it enrages everyone around him.
And that, really, pretty much sums up Portland.
Like when you're at the store and you're in a hurry, and you're standing in line and the person in front of you lets an old lady cut in front of them? An old lady who rummages in her purse for ten minutes and makes small talk with the cashier? And then writes a check and the cashier has to page a manager to approve it? And she only writes it for the dollar amount and she pays the balance IN PENNIES?
LETHAL. :lol:
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on April 12, 2012, 08:42:36 AM
Quote from: Nigel on April 12, 2012, 07:03:49 AM
It's like a wonderland here
and occasionally you stop to ask yourself, why is everyone so cheerful and POLITE?
Today EOT told me why he does it. Why he's so over-the-top courteous. Why he stops to let pedestrians cross the street, and waves people on when it's not really their turn.
He does it because it enrages everyone around him.
And that, really, pretty much sums up Portland.
Like when you're at the store and you're in a hurry, and you're standing in line and the person in front of you lets an old lady cut in front of them? An old lady who rummages in her purse for ten minutes and makes small talk with the cashier? And then writes a check and the cashier has to page a manager to approve it? And she only writes it for the dollar amount and she pays the balance IN PENNIES?
LETHAL. :lol:
Yes.
It's not that these people are clueless. It's that these people are trolling you.
Quote from: Nigel on April 12, 2012, 05:59:51 PM
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on April 12, 2012, 08:42:36 AM
Quote from: Nigel on April 12, 2012, 07:03:49 AM
It's like a wonderland here
and occasionally you stop to ask yourself, why is everyone so cheerful and POLITE?
Today EOT told me why he does it. Why he's so over-the-top courteous. Why he stops to let pedestrians cross the street, and waves people on when it's not really their turn.
He does it because it enrages everyone around him.
And that, really, pretty much sums up Portland.
Like when you're at the store and you're in a hurry, and you're standing in line and the person in front of you lets an old lady cut in front of them? An old lady who rummages in her purse for ten minutes and makes small talk with the cashier? And then writes a check and the cashier has to page a manager to approve it? And she only writes it for the dollar amount and she pays the balance IN PENNIES?
LETHAL. :lol:
Yes.
It's not that these people are clueless. It's that these people are trolling you.
Life just started making 100% more sense.
Quote from: Oysters Rockefeller on April 12, 2012, 06:12:52 PM
Quote from: Nigel on April 12, 2012, 05:59:51 PM
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on April 12, 2012, 08:42:36 AM
Quote from: Nigel on April 12, 2012, 07:03:49 AM
It's like a wonderland here
and occasionally you stop to ask yourself, why is everyone so cheerful and POLITE?
Today EOT told me why he does it. Why he's so over-the-top courteous. Why he stops to let pedestrians cross the street, and waves people on when it's not really their turn.
He does it because it enrages everyone around him.
And that, really, pretty much sums up Portland.
Like when you're at the store and you're in a hurry, and you're standing in line and the person in front of you lets an old lady cut in front of them? An old lady who rummages in her purse for ten minutes and makes small talk with the cashier? And then writes a check and the cashier has to page a manager to approve it? And she only writes it for the dollar amount and she pays the balance IN PENNIES?
LETHAL. :lol:
Yes.
It's not that these people are clueless. It's that these people are trolling you.
Life just started making 100% more sense.
I know, right?
I always suspected those people who sit at the corner and wait until you're 6 yards away to make their turn into your lane, only to drive 21mph in a 35 zone, thereby, making you shift constantly between 3rd and 4th gear (not enough rpms for 4th, too many for 3rd) were doing it on PURPOSE.
NOW, I KNOW THEY ARE.
Today, while chatting with the neighbour after grocery shopping, A squirrel came by and ate all the bird food.
(http://i151.photobucket.com/albums/s131/Slesk/IMAG1434.jpg)
Quote from: Nigel on April 12, 2012, 07:03:49 AM
It's like a wonderland here
and occasionally you stop to ask yourself, why is everyone so cheerful and POLITE?
Today EOT told me why he does it. Why he's so over-the-top courteous. Why he stops to let pedestrians cross the street, and waves people on when it's not really their turn.
He does it because it enrages everyone around him.
And that, really, pretty much sums up Portland.
OMG, I do that too.
Engineers are like your appendix. If they give you any shit, get rid of them with knives.
Tucson is like heaven today. Heaven on Earth.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on September 18, 2013, 07:26:32 PM
Engineers are like your appendix. If they give you any shit, get rid of them with knives.
Tucson is like heaven today. Heaven on Earth.
:lulz:
This can only end in tears.
Tears in the fabric of reality, that is.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on September 18, 2013, 08:25:21 PM
This can only end in tears.
Tears in the fabric of reality, that is.
:golfclap: