Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Aneristic Illusions => Topic started by: The Good Reverend Roger on April 05, 2013, 09:30:38 PM

Title: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on April 05, 2013, 09:30:38 PM
http://usnews.nbcnews.com/_news/2013/04/05/17615662-modern-day-debtors-prison-alleged-in-ohio?lite

QuoteSeveral courts in Ohio are illegally jailing people because they are too poor to pay their debts and often deny defendants a hearing to determine if they're financially capable of paying what they owe, according to an investigation released Thursday by the Ohio chapter of the American Civil Liberties Union.


Here in Arizona, of course, attempts are constantly made to bill inmates for their incarceration (even pretrial incarceration), with the idea that if they can't pay, they can't leave...IE, a vagrancy charge is a life sentence.

(Guess who's behind THAT?  If you said CCA & ALEC, give yourself a big gold star!)

(for laffs, the latest attempt:  http://www.krdo.com/news/Arizona-sheriff-plans-to-charge-inmates-for-meals/-/417220/19123810/-/k83b3p/-/index.html   ...Also, two meals a day.  Woooooo!)

Also charging the families of inmates for visits, and siezes 1% of any money deposited in an inmate's prison account by their families:

http://www.azcentral.com/news/articles/2011/09/06/20110906arizona-prison-lawsuits-over-fees-charges-inmates.html

You guessed it...Maricopa County.


Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: Q. G. Pennyworth on April 05, 2013, 09:31:56 PM
ewwwwwww
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on April 05, 2013, 09:35:39 PM
Quote from: Queen Gogira Pennyworth, BSW on April 05, 2013, 09:31:56 PM
ewwwwwww

Please note that there is no provision made for inmates who either don't have family, or whose family cannot afford to put money in the inmate's prison account.

Yes, we're back to 1800s England.  If you're in prison and your family is broke, good luck.

It's also worth noting that the Maricopa County Jail, the 3rd largest in the nation, only feeds its inmates twice per day.  If you want a third meal, you have to buy chow at the canteen.  Guess who has the contract for said canteen?  Oh, yeah.  Sheriff Arpiao's son.
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: Lenin McCarthy on April 05, 2013, 09:45:17 PM
Joe Arpaio is a chump.
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: Q. G. Pennyworth on April 05, 2013, 09:45:39 PM
I feel like I really aught to be able to laugh in the face of that shit, but I'm just not the right flavor of broken.
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: Elder Iptuous on April 05, 2013, 09:53:26 PM
Huh.  i thought we had banned them entirely, but according to the wiki page, it's left up to the states....
and according to this wsj article (http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052748704396504576204553811636610.html), one third of the states allow for imprisonment due to debt.

and the maricopa jail canteen deal is fucked up.  :eek:
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on April 05, 2013, 10:07:04 PM
Quote from: Queen Gogira Pennyworth, BSW on April 05, 2013, 09:45:39 PM
I feel like I really aught to be able to laugh in the face of that shit, but I'm just not the right flavor of broken.

Then may I suggest that Arizona isn't right for you?

Not that it matters.  Arizona is a virus.  Stay home, we'll come to you.
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: Junkenstein on April 05, 2013, 10:20:18 PM
Food as privilege again. I didn't see a solid reason why the cost jumped from .60 cents a meal to a dollar. That's a lovely chunk of profit margin. Add the kids already learning that survival costs into this system and you're going to have some very enterprising members of the black market in short order.

I would guess the ancillary charging is to help establish the cost precedent for when the emptier prisons fill up. You can almost claim it's fair with a straight face if everyone is getting fucked equally. The human cost to the most vunerable prisoners is going to be horrific. There's got to be a death toll associated with it. I'm not qualified to guess a number but I would be amazed if there are not multiple deaths through nutrition issues.


Next up: WATER.
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on April 05, 2013, 10:21:55 PM
Quote from: Junkenstein on April 05, 2013, 10:20:18 PM
Food as privilege again. I didn't see a solid reason why the cost jumped from .60 cents a meal to a dollar.

Because Arpiao's family owns the concessions.
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: Junkenstein on April 05, 2013, 10:25:07 PM
Missed that. Another mystery solved gang.

I still reckon they'll be after charging for water soon though. It's the path to making a prisoner a complete cash cow and indebted to the system to the point where they can't get out because they've not paid their tab.


You won't get 25 years in the future. You will be charged an amount of spacecash society dictates accordingly.
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 05, 2013, 10:29:27 PM
Jesus fuck

When are we going to learn? How bad do things have to get?

PRIVATIZE SCHOOLS! WOOOOOO!!!!
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on April 05, 2013, 10:31:49 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on April 05, 2013, 10:29:27 PM
Jesus fuck

When are we going to learn? How bad do things have to get?

PRIVATIZE SCHOOLS! WOOOOOO!!!!

Well, it's efficient.  They can just send the student's file directly to the prison.
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 05, 2013, 10:49:10 PM
You want to know the most AMAZING part about all of this? ALEC is writing proposed legislation operating under the idea that the poorer the general public gets, the more money they'll make.

Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on April 05, 2013, 10:50:22 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on April 05, 2013, 10:49:10 PM
You want to know the most AMAZING part about all of this? ALEC is writing proposed legislation operating under the idea that the poorer the general public gets, the more money they'll make.

They HAVE money.  What they WANT are serfs.  What's the point of having all that moolah if you don't have people tugging on their forelocks when you walk by?

This is all 169% intentional.  These people aren't stupid, they have accountants. 
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 05, 2013, 10:53:31 PM
Criminalize being in the country without documentation! Criminalize marijuana! Criminalize bullying! Criminalize debt! Criminalize truancy! Tougher penalties! Zero tolerance! Three strikes! Put 'em all in prison and AMERICA WILL PROSPER!
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on April 05, 2013, 10:54:43 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on April 05, 2013, 10:53:31 PM
Criminalize being in the country without documentation! Criminalize marijuana! Criminalize bullying! Criminalize debt! Criminalize truancy! Tougher penalties! Zero tolerance! Three strikes! Put 'em all in prison and AMERICA WILL PROSPER!

Just build a wall around the country and aim the machine guns in.

It would be simpler.
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 05, 2013, 10:54:55 PM
Especially those BLACK ones. Can't have THOSE PEOPLE running around free.
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: Anna Mae Bollocks on April 05, 2013, 11:03:09 PM
Given the "choices", yes, machine guns.
PLEASE.  :cry:
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: The Johnny on April 05, 2013, 11:35:36 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on April 05, 2013, 10:53:31 PM
Criminalize being in the country without documentation! Criminalize marijuana! Criminalize bullying! Criminalize debt! Criminalize truancy! Tougher penalties! Zero tolerance! Three strikes! Put 'em all in prison and AMERICA WILL PROSPER!

You know, i mentally read all those things in your avatar's purpoted voice and ended up with something like:

(http://www.troll.me/images/x-all-the-things/crminalyze-all-the-things.jpg)
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on April 05, 2013, 11:46:08 PM
Quote from: The Johnny on April 05, 2013, 11:35:36 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on April 05, 2013, 10:53:31 PM
Criminalize being in the country without documentation! Criminalize marijuana! Criminalize bullying! Criminalize debt! Criminalize truancy! Tougher penalties! Zero tolerance! Three strikes! Put 'em all in prison and AMERICA WILL PROSPER!

You know, i mentally read all those things in your avatar's purpoted voice and ended up with something like:

(http://www.troll.me/images/x-all-the-things/crminalyze-all-the-things.jpg)

Um.

Emote?
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: The Johnny on April 05, 2013, 11:49:34 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on April 05, 2013, 11:46:08 PM
Quote from: The Johnny on April 05, 2013, 11:35:36 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on April 05, 2013, 10:53:31 PM
Criminalize being in the country without documentation! Criminalize marijuana! Criminalize bullying! Criminalize debt! Criminalize truancy! Tougher penalties! Zero tolerance! Three strikes! Put 'em all in prison and AMERICA WILL PROSPER!

You know, i mentally read all those things in your avatar's purpoted voice and ended up with something like:

(http://www.troll.me/images/x-all-the-things/crminalyze-all-the-things.jpg)

Um.

Emote?

Im not sure how the word is spelled, and the lower text should be lower, so maybe someone with better skills should fix it, my attempts were done here:

http://www.troll.me/meme/x-all-the-things (http://www.troll.me/meme/x-all-the-things)
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 06, 2013, 12:10:16 AM
Quote from: The Johnny on April 05, 2013, 11:35:36 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on April 05, 2013, 10:53:31 PM
Criminalize being in the country without documentation! Criminalize marijuana! Criminalize bullying! Criminalize debt! Criminalize truancy! Tougher penalties! Zero tolerance! Three strikes! Put 'em all in prison and AMERICA WILL PROSPER!

You know, i mentally read all those things in your avatar's purpoted voice and ended up with something like:

(http://www.troll.me/images/x-all-the-things/crminalyze-all-the-things.jpg)

:lulz: Brilliant!
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: Anna Mae Bollocks on April 06, 2013, 12:56:32 AM
Emote worthy, indeed.

And I kind of like the borked spelling. It fits the mindset.  :lol:
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on April 06, 2013, 03:26:42 AM
Quote from: The Johnny on April 05, 2013, 11:49:34 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on April 05, 2013, 11:46:08 PM
Quote from: The Johnny on April 05, 2013, 11:35:36 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on April 05, 2013, 10:53:31 PM
Criminalize being in the country without documentation! Criminalize marijuana! Criminalize bullying! Criminalize debt! Criminalize truancy! Tougher penalties! Zero tolerance! Three strikes! Put 'em all in prison and AMERICA WILL PROSPER!

You know, i mentally read all those things in your avatar's purpoted voice and ended up with something like:

(http://www.troll.me/images/x-all-the-things/crminalyze-all-the-things.jpg)

Um.

Emote?

Im not sure how the word is spelled, and the lower text should be lower, so maybe someone with better skills should fix it, my attempts were done here:

http://www.troll.me/meme/x-all-the-things (http://www.troll.me/meme/x-all-the-things)

I sort of like the original.
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: Telarus on April 06, 2013, 12:39:56 PM
Niiiice one.
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: Junkenstein on April 06, 2013, 01:06:03 PM
Well that looks like the next election slogan.

I guess it's only a matter of time now until it becomes recursive and we must criminalise criminalising things.
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: Ben Shapiro on April 14, 2013, 12:18:03 AM
I WISH I COULD HUG NIGEL FOR MAKING ME LAUGH SO HARD!
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: navkat on April 14, 2013, 12:44:07 AM
Good! Keep 'em all in jail! More jobs and resources for ME. HAHAHAHAHA!
Title: Re: HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 14, 2013, 01:20:25 AM
Quote from: /b/earman on April 14, 2013, 12:18:03 AM
I WISH I COULD HUG NIGEL FOR MAKING ME LAUGH SO HARD!

:thanks: