Messages

Pirates note with care
Beard length and color
Few cop to a head of hair

El topico proximo es.....Oh that wacky Orpheus!

Oh verdant garnish!
Adorn mine pancacke
With resplendent pulchritude

Next topic: Those magnificent mitochondria...

Oops...breach in protocol! I forgot to select a topic...I will atone for this transgression by writing another haiku....

Topic: Einstein was a bit stodgy at times (no offense, I hope)--


Cards fall randomly
God does not play dice
But he loves Texas Hold'em


Next Topic: Symbolic logic is a pile of steaming hoo-ha

Christmas came early
Seems a polar shift
Hath fuckered up white Christmas

Haiku scheme irks me
Still, I stick to it
Because these nuns wield rulers

And our next contestant is: Exactly where do they get off, anyway?

Gruff pirate captain
Sends mutinous sailor to
Walk with the plankton

El topico proximo...  !Onomatopoeia!

His mouth smells as bog
No one offers him spearmint
Shan't embarrass RAW

And our next contestant is..... How I learned to love my six-legged brethren

Holding a pencil
He shouts, "Stick it it your eye!"
I sure surprised him

Next topic: Deadends of Evolution

Possibly my all-time favorite bit to grab the reader's attention:

"It can hardly be a coincidence that no language on Earth has ever produced the phrase, 'as pretty as an airport.' Airports are ugly. Some are very ugly. Some attain a degree of ugliness that can only be the result of a special effort."    -Douglas Adams, from The Long Dark Teatime of the Soul


Another good Douglas Adams quote? "They hung in the air in much the same way that bricks don't."

"The last word in this book will be Po-tweet!"  
                    -Slaughterhouse Five, by Kurt Vonnegut

The beatiful part is, the guy follows through with the promise. I suppose, in a way, it's the ultimate spoiler...