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A few notes on the whole "broken-hearted" thing.

Started by The Good Reverend Roger, April 06, 2011, 07:12:58 PM

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The Good Reverend Roger

April 06, 2011, 07:12:58 PM
Driving 90 MPH, right at that bridge, cause that bridge has been singing to you all week, yeah, that's the ticket, swerve at the last minute, while your FBF throws your ex's shit out the back window, and watching his shirts spiral over the side in the rear view mirror...

Or maybe you're stinking drunk and reeking of cigarettes, while you blast Bad Romance into your ear buds, while you fire up the cutting torch and lay waste to the legs of the municipal water tower, shouting "FUCK YOU, KAI!"...

Laying on the couch, fixin' to die, because those blues, those blues never fade away...

Maybe out at the club, looking HOT AS HELL, hoping he'll come by and see you in that dress, just to watch him suck his jeans up his ass, while you toy with some pleasant-faced young lad who thinks he knows the deal...

Brawling in the gutter with some skinnybitch who decided that tonight was the correct night to fuck with you, and she just got a pile of broken heart right through her broken face...

Shamelessly flirting with the cop who pulled you over for hanging your bare ass out the car window screaming "I DON'T GIVE A FUCK!"...

Fat 50-something OKCupid men smoking stale cigars, grinning over the table, asking if you'd mind letting them jam their finger in your ear because, you know, that's hot, or cracking jokes about the "fags" in the bar, maybe with a last lingering particles of cocaine still lodged in their ridiculous mustaches (Who the hell do you think you are?  LMNO?), yes, fucker, you're gonna PAY...

Why the hell not?  Why not lose your shit, scream your anger and pain out at the world?  11/12ths of them deserve it, and all ex-SOs should be dumped in the landfill with all the other trash, anyway.  Beats sitting around feeling sorry for yourself, or letting the hatred (or just plain old pain) seethe with no outlet.

Remember what Connie Dobbs said, "Behind every great man, there's a woman with an enormous strap-on."  Well, we in The Church™ have to ask, "Why limit it to great men?".  Indeed, for the duration of your heartbreak, every man in your zip code should live in fear, and caulk their asses shut with high-temp RTV every morning.  Let your Yeti howl, and let the humans beware.

Or Kill Me.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Luna

#1
April 06, 2011, 07:20:32 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on April 06, 2011, 07:12:58 PM
Laying on the couch, fixin' to die, because those blues, those blues never fade away...

Fuck that shit, Rev.  They do fade, you just have to drown 'em out with good jazz.

QuoteWhy the hell not?  Why not lose your shit, scream your anger and pain out at the world?  11/12ths of them deserve it, and all ex-SOs should be dumped in the landfill with all the other trash, anyway.  Beats sitting around feeling sorry for yourself, or letting the hatred (or just plain old pain) seethe with no outlet.

Why not?  Because he doesn't deserve it.

He never deserved my love.  He never deserved my faith.  He never deserved my trust.  And now, he doesn't deserve my hate, or my rage.

He's nothing. 
Death-dealing hormone freak of deliciousness
Pagan-Stomping Valkyrie of the Interbutts™
Rampaging Slayer of Shit-Fountain Habitues

"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 AM
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

Freeky

#2
April 06, 2011, 07:21:10 PM
:mittens:  This is so full of win.

The Good Reverend Roger

#3
April 06, 2011, 07:21:46 PM
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Luna

#4
April 06, 2011, 07:24:51 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on April 06, 2011, 07:21:46 PM
Quote from: Luna on April 06, 2011, 07:20:32 PM
good jazz.

Oxymoron.

Matter of taste.  Jazz isn't my favorite music style, either, but it fit my mood as I was typing.
Death-dealing hormone freak of deliciousness
Pagan-Stomping Valkyrie of the Interbutts™
Rampaging Slayer of Shit-Fountain Habitues

"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 AM
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

Richter

#5
April 06, 2011, 07:30:58 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on April 06, 2011, 07:12:58 PM
Driving 90 MPH, right at that bridge, cause that bridge has been singing to you all week, yeah, that's the ticket, swerve at the last minute, while your FBF throws your ex's shit out the back window, and watching his shirts spiral over the side in the rear view mirror...

Or maybe you're stinking drunk and reeking of cigarettes, while you blast Bad Romance into your ear buds, while you fire up the cutting torch and lay waste to the legs of the municipal water tower, shouting "FUCK YOU, KAI!"...

Laying on the couch, fixin' to die, because those blues, those blues never fade away...

Maybe out at the club, looking HOT AS HELL, hoping he'll come by and see you in that dress, just to watch him suck his jeans up his ass, while you toy with some pleasant-faced young lad who thinks he knows the deal...

Brawling in the gutter with some skinnybitch who decided that tonight was the correct night to fuck with you, and she just got a pile of broken heart right through her broken face...

Shamelessly flirting with the cop who pulled you over for hanging your bare ass out the car window screaming "I DON'T GIVE A FUCK!"...

Fat 50-something OKCupid men smoking stale cigars, grinning over the table, asking if you'd mind letting them jam their finger in your ear because, you know, that's hot, or cracking jokes about the "fags" in the bar, maybe with a last lingering particles of cocaine still lodged in their ridiculous mustaches (Who the hell do you think you are?  LMNO?), yes, fucker, you're gonna PAY...

Why the hell not?  Why not lose your shit, scream your anger and pain out at the world?  11/12ths of them deserve it, and all ex-SOs should be dumped in the landfill with all the other trash, anyway.  Beats sitting around feeling sorry for yourself, or letting the hatred (or just plain old pain) seethe with no outlet.

Remember what Connie Dobbs said, "Behind every great man, there's a woman with an enormous strap-on."  Well, we in The Church™ have to ask, "Why limit it to great men?".  Indeed, for the duration of your heartbreak, every man in your zip code should live in fear, and caulk their asses shut with high-temp RTV every morning.  Let your Yeti howl, and let the humans beware.

Or Kill Me.



RAAAAHHH!(BARRGLEASSCRAPFUCKCOUGHTCHEWSHITHELLDAMN)
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on May 22, 2015, 03:00:53 AM
Anyone ever think about how Richter inhabits the same reality as you and just scream and scream and scream, but in a good way?   :lulz:

Friendly Neighborhood Mentat

LMNO

#6
April 06, 2011, 07:33:06 PM
2% of my brain wants to break up with Mrs LMNO so I can do some of that.


Luckily, the other 98% beats the crap out of that part.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#7
April 06, 2011, 07:35:58 PM
:mittens:

This was so beautiful! And touching. Thank you Roger!
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Luna

#8
April 06, 2011, 07:36:59 PM
Quote from: Nigel on April 06, 2011, 07:35:58 PM
:mittens:

This was so beautiful! And touching. Thank you Roger!

It was.

I'm just done with that part, I think.

Mostly.

When I don't think about it too hard, anyway.
Death-dealing hormone freak of deliciousness
Pagan-Stomping Valkyrie of the Interbutts™
Rampaging Slayer of Shit-Fountain Habitues

"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 AM
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

The Good Reverend Roger

#9
April 06, 2011, 07:38:56 PM
Quote from: Nigel on April 06, 2011, 07:35:58 PM
:mittens:

This was so beautiful! And touching. Thank you Roger!

I was channeling Talufa.   :)
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Suu

#11
April 06, 2011, 07:45:55 PM
Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."

Phox

#12
April 06, 2011, 07:47:22 PM
Roger wins yet another internetz. He should donate them to a third-world hell-hole. Like Detroit.  :lulz:

The Good Reverend Roger

#13
April 06, 2011, 07:47:47 PM
Quote from: Suu the Infallible on April 06, 2011, 07:45:55 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on April 06, 2011, 07:21:46 PM
Quote from: Luna on April 06, 2011, 07:20:32 PM
good jazz.

Oxymoron.

Bullshit.

Jazz is four different people playing four different songs in the same room at the same time.  It is absolute garbage, with the only exceptions being Ella Fitzgerald and Scatman John, and neither one of them really qualifies as "jazz" anymore.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

The Good Reverend Roger

#14
April 06, 2011, 07:48:10 PM
Quote from: Doktor Phox on April 06, 2011, 07:47:22 PM
Roger wins yet another internetz. He should donate them to a third-world hell-hole. Like Detroit.  :lulz:

Or Phoenix.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.
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