God takes another swipe at Khara

[Suu]

I used to watch funnel clouds all the time in Florida, because they don't always touch down there...I was sitting right under one once, thinking, "If that thing comes down...I'm dead, and I can't get anywhere fast enough."

One time I was walking home from the grocery store when I was still in college, and I was on the phone with my dad. I look up because it was getting really windy, and I had 3 funnels and a waterspout about to make landfall within clear sight. I said, "BRB HUNKERING DOWN" and ran for the nearest overpass. Nothing touched down, but I was scared shitless. That stuff is pretty standard for Tampa Bay in June, but again, not anywhere NEAR Midwest caliber whirlwinds.

[Adios]

This shit almost makes me feel better knowing that anything bigger than a direct hit by a category 3 is going to throw 25 feet of water into downtown Providence.

Almost.

The deadliest difference is the warning time. Sometimes those fuckers just drop right on your head without any warning at all. Joplin thought they had 20 minutes, instead they had 5 minutes.

Absolutely! Leaving town when a tornado happens can work, but its always a gamble. When the conditions are right, one can pop up anywhere... including the middle of the road.

One night in Ellis we pulled into a convienence store, suddenly the car lifted and went sideways a couple of feet, we all hauled ass inside the store to wait it out. When we went outside later most of the canopy over the gas pumps was missing.

[Suu]

 

I would have shat brix.

[Adios]

I would have shat brix.

Did I mention that we all shat bricks? 

[Adios]

Remember this one?

I owned a construction company in Kansas. It was after a major hail storm and all of us contractors were busy replacing roofs. A tornado had come very close to town and the wind and hail had ruined every roof in town.

I got to the point where I hated roofing. It was all we did for almost 2 months. This story is about an easy roofing job. A nice easy pitch and not many cuts at all.

I always watched the skies when we were working because it was, after all, Kansas. This particular day it was over 100 degrees. It was a very hot summer.

I saw one little cloud in an otherwise clear blue sky. It was tiny! I ignored it and we kept working. All of a sudden I looked up and screamed at the crew to get off of the roof. I turned around to shoot one more nail in a roof vent.

As I turned to get off of the roof I was knocked flat on the roof by wind. I was trying to catch my breath when God showed up. I couldn't get up because of the wind and then it started raining. I don't mean rain. It was horrendous. I couldn't see, I finally had to get up or I would have drowned.

As I sat up with the wind screaming at an incredible pitch, the rain was torrential. I couldn't see over 10 feet and I was getting beat badly by the impact of the rain drops. Then I noticed some roofing paper coming loose by the edge of the roof.

I managed to crawl to the edge dragging my nail gun and was shooting it back down.
I was loosing. Suddenly Mark, one of the crew actually came back up on the roof and started helping me. We were sitting 6 feet apart and couldn't hear each other scream at each other.

Then as soon as it started it stopped. The silence was incredible. Mark and I were sitting there dazed. All of our senses were shut down from what we had just gone through.

Eventually we could see and hear again. As we sat on the roof we could see large trees down in the middle of the street. The ringing in our ears gradually subsided and we just looked at each other as we sat there realizing what we had just been through.

Mark and I had been on a roof working as a tornado had come through. Then we got the giggles. We were soaked beyond repair. The rest of the crew came out of the garage where they had hole up while it had been going on. They were wide eyed while looking at us and all we could do was laugh because we were still alive.

Then the home owner, a very kind and quiet spoken elderly lady came out of the house screaming at Mark and I for not hiding. I tried to explain that there was no way I could have gotten off of the roof but she wasn't having it.

She brought us towels and we dried off as well as we could. Then the wobbly knees started and we just had to sit down. I called it a day and we went to the bar.

[Luna]

I do hate those fucking things.

The never DID find my house.

I suspect the munchkins are living in it.

[Adios]

I do hate those fucking things.

The never DID find my house.

I suspect the munchkins are living in it.

So you DO have the Ruby Slippers!

[Luna]

I do hate those fucking things.

The never DID find my house.

I suspect the munchkins are living in it.

So you DO have the Ruby Slippers!

Ssssh, dammit!  If I have to clean another flying monkey infestation out of the rafters, I'm gonna be pissed.

[Dysfunctional Cunt]

My back from yesterday.....

NOT my vehicle, thank god!

[Adios]

"Boss, gonna be late today. There's a tree on my car. I AM FUKING SERIOUS!"

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Fucking hell!

tree behind my house pulled that business a couple of years ago. Luckily, it went down on the neighbor's fence, not mine.

[Luna]

Sheeee-it.

Glad it missed your stuff, Khara.

[Kai]

There's an old oak, one of the tallest trees in town, standing next to my parents house. It's slowly dying, and my parents hope that when it eventually goes in a windstorm it falls on their neighbor's house and not theirs.

Glad the tree (mostly) missed your stuff Khara. Looks like theres a fence to be repairing.

[Dysfunctional Cunt]

Fence to repair, a couple of basement windows to replace.  Thank goodness for insurance. 

[Adios]

One tornado already in Oklahoma. Oklahoma and most of Kansas are under at least tornado watches.

We are expecting bad weather tonight. Kara, Luna, keep your asses down, looks like it's headed your way at about 50 mph.