Attention, you snotty little lurking bastards:

[LMNO]

Oh, ye wretches that only stand and wait!  Do ye not know the awful punishment that awaits thee?  Do ye not know that there is no room in heaven or even heck for people who are merely spectators?  Who only VIEW, who never speak, who keep WAITING?  Is it not written¹ that ye shall be cast into the Nashville Bus Station for eternity?  Ye shall want for food, but only the vending machines shall await thee!

Will "Bob" or Eris hear thy excuses?  "I never know what to say", thou shall plead, and you will be told, "neither did anyone else, and THEY spewed!".  Then ye shall be tipped over in the prank chair, and go down that horrible slide into the darkness, arriving in Phoenix with strange welts and inexplicable puncture marks, and lawyers and collection agents shall jam writs under your door and Sheriff Joe will pull you over on suspicion of being suspicious, and yea, his flunkies will beat thee black & blue.

There shall be no joy in Mudville, for ye shall always strike out.  There will be no parking.  Traffic will ALWAYS suck.  The minimum wait in the urgent care clinic (which you will become intimately familiar with) shall be measured in geologic epochs.  The radio will only play Taylor Swift.  You will have to wear a tie at your new job, and suspenders covered in "flash", while you serve food to obnoxious & obese demons who never tip.

Your car will overheat, but only on the way HOME from work.  Your shoes will melt on the sidewalk.  Your cereal will START OUT mushy, and then just turn horrible.  The back of the ambulance is full of Glendale cops, and they will teach YOU not to ever again increase their paperwork.  Dogs will bite you.  Rats the size of Newt Gingrich's ass will gnaw on you in your sleep.  Valley fever will be your DEFAULT HEALTH CONDITION.

You have been warned, O ye miserable wretched fucktard assmonkeys.  So just sit there and VIEW, and pretend that EVERYTHING'S OKAY, when you know deep inside it's NOT OKAY, and that sneer on your lips will be wiped off and a sickly smile will be STAPLED TO YOUR FACE, so you can walk around pretending EVERYTHING'S JUST GREAT.  But you'll know.  Oh, yes.

Or Kill Me.




¹  If it isn't, it should be.

Bump, because... it's really freakin' dead here today.  And I spent all morning generating content.

[Doktor Howl]

Oh, ye wretches that only stand and wait!  Do ye not know the awful punishment that awaits thee?  Do ye not know that there is no room in heaven or even heck for people who are merely spectators?  Who only VIEW, who never speak, who keep WAITING?  Is it not written¹ that ye shall be cast into the Nashville Bus Station for eternity?  Ye shall want for food, but only the vending machines shall await thee!

Will "Bob" or Eris hear thy excuses?  "I never know what to say", thou shall plead, and you will be told, "neither did anyone else, and THEY spewed!".  Then ye shall be tipped over in the prank chair, and go down that horrible slide into the darkness, arriving in Phoenix with strange welts and inexplicable puncture marks, and lawyers and collection agents shall jam writs under your door and Sheriff Joe will pull you over on suspicion of being suspicious, and yea, his flunkies will beat thee black & blue.

There shall be no joy in Mudville, for ye shall always strike out.  There will be no parking.  Traffic will ALWAYS suck.  The minimum wait in the urgent care clinic (which you will become intimately familiar with) shall be measured in geologic epochs.  The radio will only play Taylor Swift.  You will have to wear a tie at your new job, and suspenders covered in "flash", while you serve food to obnoxious & obese demons who never tip.

Your car will overheat, but only on the way HOME from work.  Your shoes will melt on the sidewalk.  Your cereal will START OUT mushy, and then just turn horrible.  The back of the ambulance is full of Glendale cops, and they will teach YOU not to ever again increase their paperwork.  Dogs will bite you.  Rats the size of Newt Gingrich's ass will gnaw on you in your sleep.  Valley fever will be your DEFAULT HEALTH CONDITION.

You have been warned, O ye miserable wretched fucktard assmonkeys.  So just sit there and VIEW, and pretend that EVERYTHING'S OKAY, when you know deep inside it's NOT OKAY, and that sneer on your lips will be wiped off and a sickly smile will be STAPLED TO YOUR FACE, so you can walk around pretending EVERYTHING'S JUST GREAT.  But you'll know.  Oh, yes.

Or Kill Me.




¹  If it isn't, it should be.

Bump, because... it's really freakin' dead here today.  And I spent all morning generating content.

Going through an audit today & tomorrow.

[Doktor Howl]

I see what you mean, though.

Fucking wind whistling, coyotes howling in the distance, and a tumbleweed or two.

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

pretties take time

[minuspace]

 
Is the monkey flipping for you guys?   

[Doktor Howl]

Is the monkey flipping for you guys?   

Hey.

Shut up.

[minuspace]

Is the monkey flipping for you guys?   

Hey.

Shut up.

Call the Sherrif, if you still can.

[Luna]

Got a month to transform a barely computer literate idiot into a Payroll Professional^TM.  Attempting to convert a school system to new payroll system at the same time.

I am swamped for the next month... and that isn't counting that I have to line up a new job for April 1st.   

[minuspace]

Got a month to transform a barely computer literate idiot into a Payroll Professional^TM.  Attempting to convert a school system to new payroll system at the same time.

I am swamped for the next month... and that isn't counting that I have to line up a new job for April 1st.   

I'd like to second that push, although there may be a soiree of festivities for fat Friday fantabulousness tonight...  Then we can polish-off those phosphorescent sculls?

[AFK]

I'm in the middle of budget revisions, workplan revisions, public health document revisions, and being in the middle of a big ole fight between my agency and the director of the other federal grant I was working on.  Seems as though me quitting and switching to a new grant has caused a gigantic clusterfuck.  Eris would be proud!

[Don Coyote]

I got some stuff that wants writing, but I at the same time I got other creative works that aren't really all that interesting to PD that need pounding my head against. But shit like the "WHY ISN'T ANYONE POSTING?!?!" makes me want to just GTFO.

[Doktor Howl]

I got some stuff that wants writing, but I at the same time I got other creative works that aren't really all that interesting to PD that need pounding my head against. But shit like the "WHY ISN'T ANYONE POSTING?!?!" makes me want to just GTFO.

Well, then, allow me to get the fuck out of the way.

[Don Coyote]

I got some stuff that wants writing, but I at the same time I got other creative works that aren't really all that interesting to PD that need pounding my head against. But shit like the "WHY ISN'T ANYONE POSTING?!?!" makes me want to just GTFO.

Well, then, allow me to get the fuck out of the way.

Doesn't this seems kind of fucking familiar?

[Doktor Howl]

I got some stuff that wants writing, but I at the same time I got other creative works that aren't really all that interesting to PD that need pounding my head against. But shit like the "WHY ISN'T ANYONE POSTING?!?!" makes me want to just GTFO.

Well, then, allow me to get the fuck out of the way.

Doesn't this seems kind of fucking familiar?

Yeah, I was just mentioning that in Paes' thread.

To clarify:  You are offended by me being offended by people being too offended - or too afraid of offending people - to post?

Did I get that right?  Because it's kinda hard to keep track without a scorecard.

[Doktor Howl]

Learning from mistakes is for nerds.