I have a confession

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Sometimes, all I really wish for is to be normal. To be complacent, happy, and dull.

Being weird is lonely. You can't just turn it off when it becomes inconvenient, and I don't want to be anyone's novelty.

I come here because, for the most part, this is one of the few places where I feel like I belong. Even when people hate me, I still know I'm not alone, not the only malcontent in an ocean of the unquestioning.

But then I wonder whether maybe everyone feels exactly this way, exactly this isolated, this strange. Maybe this is the baseline experience of human existence.

Or maybe it's the flu speaking.

I think I miss being married.

[Freeky]

Hang in there, lady.  I know how you feel.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I always get all emo when I'm ill. I'll be OK soon enough.

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

Sometimes being weird means being by yourself. And the alternative to being weird is:



Which is still weird, but in all the wrong ways. (Maybe weirdness really is the baseline) Something tells me all the adults in that pic are married, too.

No. Just...NO. 

[Freeky]

I always get all emo when I'm ill. I'll be OK soon enough.

LOOK AT THAT FUCKING CHICKEN! FEEL BETTER!

[Salty]

It feels like the OP was ripped out of my head.

One thin that makes that even worse for me is when I meet someone similar enough, but then it goes horribly, horribly wrong. Bad wiring. Yet I'm still not like the rest of these fucks.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Yeah, I don't want to be them, either.

I think it's just that when I'm sick I feel vulnerable and want to be taken care of, so these feelings come to the surface more readily. I was married for most of my adult life, and FFS, I LIKE being married.

I'll feel more myself in the morning.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I always get all emo when I'm ill. I'll be OK soon enough.

LOOK AT THAT FUCKING CHICKEN! FEEL BETTER!

You're funny.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

It feels like the OP was ripped out of my head.

One thin that makes that even worse for me is when I meet someone similar enough, but then it goes horribly, horribly wrong. Bad wiring. Yet I'm still not like the rest of these fucks.

Oh god, yes. It's possibly worse when I meet someone similar enough, and then we scar each other for life and go our separate ways a little bit MORE lonely than before.

[Doktor Howl]

Sometimes, all I really wish for is to be normal. To be complacent, happy, and dull.

Being weird is lonely. You can't just turn it off when it becomes inconvenient, and I don't want to be anyone's novelty.

I come here because, for the most part, this is one of the few places where I feel like I belong. Even when people hate me, I still know I'm not alone, not the only malcontent in an ocean of the unquestioning.

But then I wonder whether maybe everyone feels exactly this way, exactly this isolated, this strange. Maybe this is the baseline experience of human existence.

Or maybe it's the flu speaking.

I think I miss being married.

I've never gotten sick of the weird, though I have grown weary of weirdos, from time to time.  But that's just mostly when they force it.  I definitely feel isolated and strange; I can't get my head around the way "normal" people live & think (or say they think).  It feels like I'm being trolled, like everyone's having a good laugh at my expense, because I seriously bought shit like Sarah Palin and Rick Santorum.

And there's a cure for people treating you like a novelty.  Pretty sure you already know that.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I always think I'm being trolled. And am always disappointed when it turns out I'm not.

I think that a good night's sleep, starting now, will help fix some of this melancholy.

[Doktor Howl]

I always think I'm being trolled. And am always disappointed when it turns out I'm not.

I think that a good night's sleep, starting now, will help fix some of this melancholy.

Yep.  It's like you told me a few weeks back:  More sleep, less booze, get out and walk around.

Did me a world of fucking good.

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

Feel better, Nigel.

[Sir Squid Diddimus]

That feeling when you're surrounded by people, but you're all alone.
Yeah.



It's lonely in my world.

[Richter]

Sometimes, all I really wish for is to be normal. To be complacent, happy, and dull.

Being weird is lonely. You can't just turn it off when it becomes inconvenient, and I don't want to be anyone's novelty.

I come here because, for the most part, this is one of the few places where I feel like I belong. Even when people hate me, I still know I'm not alone, not the only malcontent in an ocean of the unquestioning.

But then I wonder whether maybe everyone feels exactly this way, exactly this isolated, this strange. Maybe this is the baseline experience of human existence.

Or maybe it's the flu speaking.

I think I miss being married.

Nigel, in the most caring way possible, fuck this line of thinking.

I spent part of high school thinking like that.  If I was this normal, then I realized I wouldn't have perspective.  I would be happy with all the little hand-fed, manufacture hings that will make 51% of the people satisfied.  I'd be into the right sports, play the right way, try to get the good grades, and otherwise accept a hamster wheel for a lost highway.  It STILL wouldn't equate to contentment either.  There'd be contentment, eventually, but it would be the prosaic kind.  Sure, my fun may not come as often or as easy.  That wasn't a dysfunction though, just a different timetable.  It's still all the more worthwhile when it does happen too.