STAR WARS IS NOT SCIENCE FICTION.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Well of course. It doesn't have nearly enough telepathic cats to be real SciFi.

[Pope Pixie Pickle]

ETA: Also, Given that time and space is infinite and parallel universes and quantums and shit, there is a galaxy somewhere, where Roger is R2D2 and that thought has kept me going through many a long dark night of the soul

That means that there is a galaxy somewhere, where Nigel is Darth Vader. 

I nominate Payne for Luke Skywalker.  or, would Cram fit into that role better?

I am, of course, an Ewok.

[AFK]

Cram is Admiral Ackbar.


Pterodactyl Handler is that fat dude who handles the Rancor.


LMNO is Lando, of course.


I'm Obi-Wan during that time between movies when he moonlighted as a comedian in Mos Eisley.

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

Definitely science fantasy. 

How does the Millenium Falcon go?  You make the throttle go forward, and the ship goes moar faster!  Duh.

Compare to Star Trek:
How does the Enterprise go?  There's a warp drive, and dilithium crystals, and antimatter, and science jargon happens, and you push a sequence of buttons and then and only then does the ship go moar faster.

THIS.

And the original Star Wars was just Lucas using the Campbell "Hero's Journey" template and sticking SPACE and SPESHUL AFFECKS in it.

[Triple Zero]

Can I be the annoying paranoid robot, Lieutenant Data? My favourite scene is where he says "Here I am, brain the size of a planet ..."

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Can I be the annoying paranoid robot, Lieutenant Data? My favourite scene is where he says "Here I am, brain the size of a planet ..."

[Freeky]

Can I be the annoying paranoid robot, Lieutenant Data? My favourite scene is where he says "Here I am, brain the size of a planet ..."

[Telarus]

 

[Triple Zero]

Before he joined the Dalek side of the Force, of course.

[Junkenstein]

It's fantasy.  Harry Potter in space.

There.  I said it.

I always had it categorized in the genre of "trite crap full of unlikeable actors".

Woah.

Steady.

I'ma gonna let you finish, but there's something really fucking important you need to consider before you continue.
Here's 1000 words or so


They may have been trite, unlikable actors, but my 14 year old self will defend Carrie fisher TO THE DEATH.

[Richter]

It does smack of "the kid gets super powered to make right", for his definition of right.  Much like the Matrix and Revenge of the nerds.

As long as we are picking roles i call Corran Horn.

[Luna]

Dibs on Aayla Secura.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Before he joined the Dalek side of the Force, of course.

The fact that this so enrages me reveals me for the nerd I am.

[Triple Zero]

It's fantasy.  Harry Potter in space.

There.  I said it.

I always had it categorized in the genre of "trite crap full of unlikeable actors".

Woah.

Steady.

I'ma gonna let you finish, but there's something really fucking important you need to consider before you continue.
Here's 1000 words or so


They may have been trite, unlikable actors, but my 14 year old self will defend Carrie fisher TO THE DEATH.

But there's like, zillions of space-fantasy/scifi movies with scantily-clad ladies that are not as gut-wrenchingly boring.

For instance, ZARDOZ.

Hell, it's got straight out nudity (WHAT I THOUGHT ONLY HBO WAS ALLOWED TO DO THAT--Nope.) and a giant floating head that says THE PENIS IS EVIL, and, you know, Sean Connery in a ridiculous outfit.

So, apart from Chewbacca (which I admit, could potentially also have been Sean Connery in a ridiculous outfit), how can Star Wars even pretend to measure up to it?

[Junkenstein]

Three Words.



CARRIE. GODDAMN. FISHER.

TAKE YOUR "ZARDTIME" AND CRAM IT. CRAM IT SO LONG AND HARD YOU EVENTUALLY HAVE TO BLOW IT OUT YOUR OVERSIZED SELF RIGHTEOUSNESS ZARDOS MOTHERFUCKING ASS. YOU DON'T WANT TO BE CHEWBACCA IN THAT FUCKING PICTURE YOU WERE NEVER A 13 YEAR OLD BOY.

GODDAMN.


Fucking Zardos