What the fuck is it

[tyrannosaurus vex]

With broccoli in Arizona?

I have a long and lovely history of eating broccoli. It is one of the few reasons why I would hesitate to push the Big Red Button if I ever made it far enough past security to get near it. Any planet that produces such a thing as broccoli is a planet that is at least theoretically worth saving. Broccoli has been there for some of the most important times in my life, and I consider it one of my favorite inanimate life partners.

But in Arizona, broccoli has apparently been irradiated by the Sun or something, and it causes me gastric disturbances of a magnitude I will not describe in too much detail, since I am a sensitive man and do not wish to burden you all with tales of such hurricanular flatulence.

So, to those of you who are familiar with Arizona: What the fuck is wrong with your broccoli?

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Broccoli is a member of the cabbage family, and in some people cabbage relatives can cause excessive flatulence. This sensitivity may come on or increase with age.

Use your gift wisely.

[P3nT4gR4m]

hurricanular?  Please tell me this is an honest to fuck, genuine, bona fide word?

[AFK]

Broccoli is a horrible excuse for "food", and clearly was never intended to be eaten by humans.  Leave it to the fucking rabbits and eat more cheeseburgers.

[tyrannosaurus vex]

hurricanular?  Please tell me this is an honest to fuck, genuine, bona fide word?

It is now!

[Eater of Clowns]

I think the solution is to eat as much broccoli as you can possibly handle.  It'll build up your immunity again, because it's clear that you're unused to the delicious vegetable and are suffering from it.

Alternately, cook the broccoli in a shallow bit of simmering water and drink the resulting green liquid with vodka.

[East Coast Hustle]

hurricanular?  Please tell me this is an honest to fuck, genuine, bona fide word?

Sorry, Vex is just a heathen who can't spell. The actual word is "hurricanal".

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

If I'm lactose intolerant and get the farts if I put too much milk in COFFEE, and don't dare drink a glass of the shit lest I get nuclear diarrhea, why doesn't cheese or yogurt bother me?

[Sita]

If I'm lactose intolerant and get the farts if I put too much milk in COFFEE, and don't dare drink a glass of the shit lest I get nuclear diarrhea, why doesn't cheese or yogurt bother me?

The bacteria used to make cheese and yogurt like to eat the lactose, so there isn't as much in it as actual milk.
At least that is what I was told once.

[Luna]

I have just produced an entire cookie sheet full of Nachos at the new boyfriend's house.  (I gotta come up with a handle for him.)  Black bean chips, refried beans, and black bean salsa.  And a pile of cheese.

My God have mercy on our souls.

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

If I'm lactose intolerant and get the farts if I put too much milk in COFFEE, and don't dare drink a glass of the shit lest I get nuclear diarrhea, why doesn't cheese or yogurt bother me?

The bacteria used to make cheese and yogurt like to eat the lactose, so there isn't as much in it as actual milk.
At least that is what I was told once.

That makes sense - thanks, Sita.