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For my part, I've replaced optimism and believing the best of people by default with a grin and the absolute 100% certainty that if they cannot find a pig to fuck, they will buy some bacon and play oinking noises on YouTube.

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Listen up you scabby turds!

Started by Sir Squid Diddimus, September 28, 2012, 02:29:23 AM

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Eater of Clowns

#15
September 28, 2012, 03:23:15 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 28, 2012, 03:18:28 AM
Quote from: A Very Hairy Monkey In An Ill-Fitting Tunic on September 28, 2012, 03:13:04 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 28, 2012, 02:31:31 AM
Quote from: Sir Squid Diddimus on September 28, 2012, 02:29:23 AM
I can't be held accountable every time Roger decides to go on one of his little tangents.
"You weren't around enough. You didn't hold him enough. You didn't teach him enough life lessons, how to cook, how to wipe is ass, etc.."
So now what. We have some self-important asshat of a "human being" what wears madgiqual underwear running against a kenyan alien from space, drones spying on us and killing families in foreign countries with no reach around, cats AND dogs living in the same household, hellish chicken sandwiches made of hate and fear banned by the rainbow toting hippies who just want their fair share of their lover's loot and this is MY FAULT??

Fuck you! Take responsibility AND take that scurvy bastard out for a walk every once in a while. Do I have to do EVERYTHING around here?!?

FUCKING FUUUUUUUUCK!!

They neglect me, Squiddy.  :cry:

I WANT to be good, but I have had no guidance or life-lessons from any of these abusive assbaskets.

You know what they say; there are no bad TGRRs, only bad TGGR owners.

Didn't anybody read the manual?

SOMEBODY CALL THE HELP DESK!

The first thing my TGRR did was destroy the manual, and when admonished for it, he said it was my fault for not specifically telling him not to.

I gave him a vindaloo treat; it really was an impeccable argument.
Quote from: Pippa Twiddleton on December 22, 2012, 01:06:36 AM
EoC, you are the bane of my existence.

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 07, 2014, 01:18:23 AM
EoC doesn't make creepy.

EoC makes creepy worse.

Quote
the afflicted persons get hold of and consume carrots even in socially quite unacceptable situations.

Freeky

#16
September 28, 2012, 03:29:21 AM
Oh dear.  A vindaloo treat?  That's like giving your dog chocolate, only it won't kill him, he'll kill your bathroom.

P3nT4gR4m

#17
September 28, 2012, 10:25:38 AM
My TGRR peed a hole, clean through the wall of my garage. Now I have environmental health all up in my ass, whining on about mutagenic bacteria infestations and how much it's going to cost the taxpayer to disinfect the water supply  :horrormirth:

I'm up to my arse in Brexit Numpties, but I want more.  Target-rich environments are the new sexy.
Not actually a meat product.
Ass-Kicking & Foot-Stomping Ancient Master of SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK
Awful and Bent Behemothic Results of Last Night's Painful Squat.
High Altitude Haggis-Filled Sex Bucket From Beyond Time and Space.
Internet Monkey Person of Filthy and Immoral Pygmy-Porn Wart Contagion
Octomom Auxillary Heat Exchanger Repairman
walking the fine line line between genius and batshit fucking crazy

"computation is a pattern in the spacetime arrangement of particles, and it's not the particles but the pattern that really matters! Matter doesn't matter." -- Max Tegmark

LMNO

#18
September 28, 2012, 01:40:20 PM
Have you tried turning him off, and then turning him back on again?

The Good Reverend Roger

#19
September 28, 2012, 02:51:49 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on September 28, 2012, 01:40:20 PM
Have you tried turning him off, and then turning him back on again?

:eek:
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#20
September 28, 2012, 03:22:14 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on September 28, 2012, 01:40:20 PM
Have you tried turning him off, and then turning him back on again?

Part A is OK, but part B is potentially fatal.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Don Coyote

#21
September 28, 2012, 08:01:31 PM
My Roger defaulted to MAIN. :argh!:

Phox

#22
September 28, 2012, 08:42:37 PM
Strange. I have no complaints. My TGRR is operating aas intended. You know, terrorizing the locals, destroying golf courses, tinkering with whatever he can stuff in his pants and/or disassemble.... I fail to see where this is not exactly what I want.

The Good Reverend Roger

#23
September 28, 2012, 08:43:05 PM
Quote from: Doktor D. Jennifer Phox on September 28, 2012, 08:42:37 PM
Strange. I have no complaints. My TGRR is operating aas intended. You know, terrorizing the locals, destroying golf courses, tinkering with whatever he can stuff in his pants and/or disassemble.... I fail to see where this is not exactly what I want.

My Roger has a defective ear hole.   :sad:
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Phox

#24
September 28, 2012, 08:43:54 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 28, 2012, 08:43:05 PM
Quote from: Doktor D. Jennifer Phox on September 28, 2012, 08:42:37 PM
Strange. I have no complaints. My TGRR is operating aas intended. You know, terrorizing the locals, destroying golf courses, tinkering with whatever he can stuff in his pants and/or disassemble.... I fail to see where this is not exactly what I want.

My Roger has a defective ear hole.   :sad:
I thought that was just a feature.

Sir Squid Diddimus

#25
September 28, 2012, 08:47:13 PM
Try yelling into it, or as I call it, a manual re-boot

The Good Reverend Roger

#26
September 28, 2012, 08:48:15 PM
Quote from: Sir Squid Diddimus on September 28, 2012, 08:47:13 PM
Try yelling into it, or as I call it, a manual re-boot

I can have Jenn try that.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#27
September 28, 2012, 09:21:31 PM
ROGER™: MORE FUN THAN YOU WANTED.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

The Good Reverend Roger

#28
September 28, 2012, 09:22:13 PM
Quote from: A Very Hairy Monkey In An Ill-Fitting Tunic on September 28, 2012, 09:21:31 PM
ROGER™: MORE FUN THAN YOU REALLY WANTED.

I think that's catchier.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#29
September 28, 2012, 09:23:35 PM
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

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