What Might Actually Be Happening, part II of V

[The Good Reverend Roger]

You know, maybe that last "close call" you had in traffic was even closer than you think.  Maybe, just maybe, you didn't just scream at the other car, or even get out to exchange insurance information.  Maybe the cops and the fire department came.  Then the EMTs.  Then maybe they all had a smoke and felt really bad about it all.

Then The Cleaners showed up, and hosed the rest of you out of your car, and you ran down the curb into the nearest storm drain.  And you know where THAT leads...So while you THINK you're in Boston or Fresno or Portland or whatever, you're really in Tucson.  Some people realize this and adjust.  The ones that can't either get a day job and live in a fantasy in which they are still living & working in the city they were just in, or they freak out and head for the bridges and...And who knows what goes on in their heads?

It's possible.  You can only go by how your brain chooses to interpret your surroundings as reported by your senses.  Your nerves are feeling scorching October heat, and your brain is interpreting it as rain in Providence.  You really have no proof that what you're THINKING lines up with REALITY.

Until until until you wake up under the Palo Verde bridge, with an overcoat full of empty gin bottles and a smelly sleeping bag.  Your screams go unnoticed...This IS, after all, Tucson.  Then everything goes fuzzy for a while, you're...

...Out with your significant other, you're having a great time, all your friends are on their way.  You turn to the bartender and ask him for another beer, but he says...

"Move along, sir."  And he jerks his thumb past his squadcar, towards the road.  You get up, trying to protest that you have no idea where you are or how you got here, but he doesn't care.  Good God, you've shat yourself.  WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?  And as you shuffle down the road...

...You're talking to your boss on the way to the conference room.  He's letting you know you did a great job on the Jones account, and he's expecting big things to come your way, but then he yells...

"Look out, you Goddamn hobo!  I almost ran you over!", screams the driver of the delivery van.  You're smack in the middle of the intersection, children are laughing at the funny person while their parents fume and swear.  You can feel the sweat running down your back, with some horrible gritty stuff in it.  You dash for the sidewalk...

...And run into the club, Goddamn traffic is crazy this week.  You go inside, and meet your significant other, who asks you to try his/her drink, it's something new...

...And you take the bottle of gin from the other hobo, take a swig, and thank him.

Welcome Home.

   

[Freeky]

I want to know what sort of deity would send innocent children down the drain.  They didn't do anything to deserve Tucson, and yet they grow up here, anyway.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I want to know what sort of deity would send innocent children down the drain.  They didn't do anything to deserve Tucson, and yet they grow up here, anyway.

The muck has to go somewhere, right?

[Freeky]

I guess.  Perhaps getting a decent burial or cremation would have been kinder, though.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I guess.  Perhaps getting a decent burial or cremation would have been kinder, though.

Same thing happens.  They let you leave the graveside before they actually lower the body for a reason.  It just keeps going down.  30 meters of cable...50 meters of cable...100 meters of cable...whatever it takes to get you where you're going.

Which is right here.  With me.

[LMNO]

I want to know what sort of deity would send innocent children down the drain.  They didn't do anything to deserve Tucson, and yet they grow up here, anyway.

Malevolent.


Roger, this is strong stuff.

This morning, Mrs LMNO and I were walking to the subway to get to work.  We must cross the street to get there.

We have the Shining Walking Man, and then it turns to the Red Hand, with numbers:  10.   9.   8. 

"Oh, no!" says Mrs LMNO.  "We've only got seven seconds!"

6.   5.   4. 

"We won't make it!"  There are no cars on the road, except for one, several hundred yards away.

3.   2.   1. 

We find ourselves still walking in the middle of the street, a Red Hand and no numbers, the lights changing from red to green.  The lone car is still nowhere near the intersection.  "That's it, we're dead," I say.

We get to the other side of the street, heading to the subway.  "Funny," Mrs LMNO says, "it doesn't feel any different."

"That's because we're dead, and this is the afterlife," I reply.  "An eternity of walking to work, too early, on an overcast day.  This is it.  That's all we get."

"I thought Hell would be worse."

"We're not bad people.  The universe is simply indifferent."

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I want to know what sort of deity would send innocent children down the drain.  They didn't do anything to deserve Tucson, and yet they grow up here, anyway.

Malevolent.


Roger, this is strong stuff.

This morning, Mrs LMNO and I were walking to the subway to get to work.  We must cross the street to get there.

We have the Shining Walking Man, and then it turns to the Red Hand, with numbers:  10.   9.   8. 

"Oh, no!" says Mrs LMNO.  "We've only got seven seconds!"

6.   5.   4. 

"We won't make it!"  There are no cars on the road, except for one, several hundred yards away.

3.   2.   1. 

We find ourselves still walking in the middle of the street, a Red Hand and no numbers, the lights changing from red to green.  The lone car is still nowhere near the intersection.  "That's it, we're dead," I say.

We get to the other side of the street, heading to the subway.  "Funny," Mrs LMNO says, "it doesn't feel any different."

"That's because we're dead, and this is the afterlife," I reply.  "An eternity of walking to work, too early, on an overcast day.  This is it.  That's all we get."

"I thought Hell would be worse."

"We're not bad people.  The universe is simply indifferent."

Walking with your wife forever?  That's not a bad deal at all.

I met my wife in the afterlife, so it's just another day for us.

ETA:  Hang on just a second.  No traffic in Boston?  You're fooling yourself.

[LMNO]

There is a distinct possibility that we were dead before this happened.

[Freeky]

In a way, it makes sense, though.  Single moms who rarely see their exes after the babbies are born, they died during childbirth, and Dad drinks himself into oblivion once a week because he misses her, misses them both, so much.  In the Heat and Haze, though, it just feels like they hate each other. 

Or the service member who was sent to Davis Monthan after being in Afghanistan, and never left to go home after he was discharged, and only talks to his family every so often over the phone.  Well, we know what happened to him, and his family misses him every day.  Sometimes they dream that he's still alive, and living somewhere hot and grey.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I want to know what sort of deity would send innocent children down the drain.  They didn't do anything to deserve Tucson, and yet they grow up here, anyway.

You just think they're children, just like you thought you were a child, once.