It just keeps coming, man: A parable

[Nephew Twiddleton]

They say that shit happens. Sometimes shit happens a lot and you're on the can all day. You can't really do a whole lot about it. Just go in, try to get it all out, wipe, pull up your pants, and flush it away. At first it's not so bad, you're just glad to have gotten it over and done with, and maybe you shit at work on purpose so you could get paid for not doing your job for a good ten minutes. But there comes those times where you just have to keep going.

It's not that you have the runs, or are all stopped up, or even just full of shit. It just keeps coming, man. And at the end of the day, when you have taken out all of the garbage, as it were, you're left with an orifice that's chapped from repeated wiping, and you could swear there was a little blood on that last wad.

Then comes the worst part- the itch. So even though you no longer have to drop one, you have to keep running back to the bathroom, wad up some more sandpaper, and rub until satisfied. But the satisfaction does not last. No, you've just irritated it more, it will itch again shortly. At that point you're stuck in a loop, and you dread the next time you have to take a shit again, because you don't even want to think about what it would do to your current state.

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

So much truth. So. Much. Truth.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

So much truth. So. Much. Truth.

Thanks.

I felt inspired.

[EK WAFFLR]

That was a great read !

[Nephew Twiddleton]

That was a great read !

Feel free to print out (translating as necessary) and leaving in the men's room for some reading material. I have another one forming in me. Gotta let it ferment more I think.

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

The moral of this story is never let a Discordian use your bathroom.

[Doktor Howl]

Twid just described my job.   

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Twid just described my job.   

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I had you somewhat in mind when I was writing it.