DEAR NEW FRIENDS

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

No way man. It can't be that easy. This is PD. There are all kinds of loop-holes and hoops to jump through. Your suggestion REEKS of common sense Nigel. Which tells me right off the bat it's wrong. There's an evil cult of big personalities here, just waiting to land on anyone who has an opinion, like a ton of bricks.



I know it because I'm insecure and don't really know how I feel about a certain topic because if you disagree then I'm going to feel stupid because I don't know how to back up my position because really, I haven't given it that much thought. I mean, I thought about it. But just not that much. Because, you know, there was this TV show on that I wanted to watch and then I had to do school work/homework/work work and, well.

It's so much easier to ask you what I should think instead of spending precious time thinking about it for myself. Because you're way smarter than me and if I agree with you then I'll feel that special little glow that tells me I'm running with the right crowd and doing the right things. That's all I really want.

Thinking is too hard and putting myself out there like that, when I could be WRONG, is just so much harder than thinking in the first place.

Clearly you're setting me up for an elaborate prank. Probably involving lasers and fishhooks.

Such a delicate knife you use to filet with, my dear! 

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

No way man. It can't be that easy. This is PD. There are all kinds of loop-holes and hoops to jump through. Your suggestion REEKS of common sense Nigel. Which tells me right off the bat it's wrong. There's an evil cult of big personalities here, just waiting to land on anyone who has an opinion, like a ton of bricks.



I know it because I'm insecure and don't really know how I feel about a certain topic because if you disagree then I'm going to feel stupid because I don't know how to back up my position because really, I haven't given it that much thought. I mean, I thought about it. But just not that much. Because, you know, there was this TV show on that I wanted to watch and then I had to do school work/homework/work work and, well.

It's so much easier to ask you what I should think instead of spending precious time thinking about it for myself. Because you're way smarter than me and if I agree with you then I'll feel that special little glow that tells me I'm running with the right crowd and doing the right things. That's all I really want.

Thinking is too hard and putting myself out there like that, when I could be WRONG, is just so much harder than thinking in the first place.

Clearly you're setting me up for an elaborate prank. Probably involving lasers and fishhooks.

Such a delicate knife you use to filet with, my dear! 

I'm dainty and delicate all over. My filleting knife has a pink handle with butterflies on it.

[Doktor Howl]

For the purposes of this conversation, let's just say that "new" refers to anyone who hasn't been around long enough to have figured out that I'm not a mister.

Lies.  I have met Nigel, and "she" is actually a 6'2", 300 pound stevedore with a hairy nose and a penis so damaged from STDs that it is often mistaken for a large traffic cone with hives.

He posts pics he swiped off of Angela Davis' Facebook page, and tries to get Craigslist junkies to meet "her" in dark and filthy bars, where "she" does the big reveal.  His victims are then fished out of the estuary with no face.  The Portland police know who he is; as do I.  So why has he not been arrested?  Because everyone hates Craigslist junkies.  Each and every one of the snivelling punk bastards.

There.  I said it.

[Junkenstein]

Nigel - The hero you deserve.

[Doktor Howl]

Nigel - The hero you deserve.

Nigel - The Hero You Ordered.  So stop crying.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

For the purposes of this conversation, let's just say that "new" refers to anyone who hasn't been around long enough to have figured out that I'm not a mister.

Lies.  I have met Nigel, and "she" is actually a 6'2", 300 pound stevedore with a hairy nose and a penis so damaged from STDs that it is often mistaken for a large traffic cone with hives.

He posts pics he swiped off of Angela Davis' Facebook page, and tries to get Craigslist junkies to meet "her" in dark and filthy bars, where "she" does the big reveal.  His victims are then fished out of the estuary with no face.  The Portland police know who he is; as do I.  So why has he not been arrested?  Because everyone hates Craigslist junkies.  Each and every one of the snivelling punk bastards.

There.  I said it.

[Cain]

Also worth adding to the OP: if you're going to ask someone their opinion, try to make it into a conversation.

Otherwise, it just seems like another case of "think for me, thinkmonkey".

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

Tangentially related: if you have a piece of fiction or parable that's about half formed and you'd like to bounce it off the board to get the other half solid, where's a good place to post that?

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Tangentially related: if you have a piece of fiction or parable that's about half formed and you'd like to bounce it off the board to get the other half solid, where's a good place to post that?

Literate Chaotic, probably?

[Doktor Howl]

Tangentially related: if you have a piece of fiction or parable that's about half formed and you'd like to bounce it off the board to get the other half solid, where's a good place to post that?

Just not Or Kill Me, on account of it's the last remnant of Lauren's ghettoization of all things non-cookies & pie.

[Left]

For the purposes of this conversation, let's just say that "new" refers to anyone who hasn't been around long enough to have figured out that I'm not a mister.

Yeah, really. 
I mean, everyone knows M. is the abbreviation for Monsieur, not Mister.

Thought it was an abbreviation for Mistress, which is what the guy she keeps tied up in the closet calls her.

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

For the purposes of this conversation, let's just say that "new" refers to anyone who hasn't been around long enough to have figured out that I'm not a mister.

Yeah, really. 
I mean, everyone knows M. is the abbreviation for Monsieur, not Mister.

Thought it was an abbreviation for Mistress, which is what the guy she keeps tied up in the closet calls her.

We are all in Nigel's closet. We are all tied up. Only she didn't do the tying. She's just not above whacking people for kicks and going through their pockets for pizza money and mints. The only thing outside of Nigel's closet is her house. And Tucson. And possibly that weird spinny cursed statue. I don't think that's something she wants to keep in here. And even as far as Tucson goes, she keeps bringing buckets of sand into the closet and dumping it on the ground . . .

[Left]

For the purposes of this conversation, let's just say that "new" refers to anyone who hasn't been around long enough to have figured out that I'm not a mister.

Yeah, really. 
I mean, everyone knows M. is the abbreviation for Monsieur, not Mister.

Thought it was an abbreviation for Mistress, which is what the guy she keeps tied up in the closet calls her.

We are all in Nigel's closet. We are all tied up. Only she didn't do the tying. She's just not above whacking people for kicks and going through their pockets for pizza money and mints. The only thing outside of Nigel's closet is her house. And Tucson. And possibly that weird spinny cursed statue. I don't think that's something she wants to keep in here. And even as far as Tucson goes, she keeps bringing buckets of sand into the closet and dumping it on the ground . . .

I know, it's in my shorts.
I'm trying to get my toes up my pants legs to scratch, which is why I'm in  a position that would make a contortionist flinch.
I really wish she'd just shackle my ankle instead.
Wonder what's for dinner?

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

For the purposes of this conversation, let's just say that "new" refers to anyone who hasn't been around long enough to have figured out that I'm not a mister.

Yeah, really. 
I mean, everyone knows M. is the abbreviation for Monsieur, not Mister.

Thought it was an abbreviation for Mistress, which is what the guy she keeps tied up in the closet calls her.

We are all in Nigel's closet. We are all tied up. Only she didn't do the tying. She's just not above whacking people for kicks and going through their pockets for pizza money and mints. The only thing outside of Nigel's closet is her house. And Tucson. And possibly that weird spinny cursed statue. I don't think that's something she wants to keep in here. And even as far as Tucson goes, she keeps bringing buckets of sand into the closet and dumping it on the ground . . .

I know, it's in my shorts.
I'm trying to get my toes up my pants legs to scratch, which is why I'm in  a position that would make a contortionist flinch.
I really wish she'd just shackle my ankle instead.
Wonder what's for dinner?

Vaporized alcohol and sand.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]