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TESTEMONAIL:  Right and Discordianism allows room for personal interpretation. You have your theories and I have mine. Unlike Christianity, Discordia allows room for ideas and opinions, and mine is well-informed and based on ancient philosophy and theology, so, my neo-Discordian friends, open your minds to my interpretation and I will open my mind to yours. That's fair enough, right? Just claiming to be discordian should mean that your mind is open and willing to learn and share ideas. You guys are fucking bashing me and your laughing at my theologies and my friends know what's up and are laughing at you and honestly this is my last shot at putting a label on my belief structure and your making me lose all hope of ever finding a ideological group I can relate to because you don't even know what the fuck I'm talking about and everything I have said is based on the founding principals of real Discordianism. Expand your mind.

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Bill of Rights for the Real World

Started by tyrannosaurus vex, October 24, 2012, 08:11:21 AM

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tyrannosaurus vex

#30
October 24, 2012, 07:34:57 PM
YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO LOSE YOUR JOB AND YOUR FAMILY WHILE WE DECIDE WHETHER YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE HERE OR NOT. YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO AN IMMEDIATE SENTENCING, SHOULD YOU CHOOSE TO EXPEDITE YOUR CASE, AND SHOULD YOU BE "FEELING LUCKY." YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO INCUR ALL CONSEQUENCES OF CONVICTION, REGARDLESS OF WHETHER OR NOT YOU ARE ACTUALLY CONVICTED.
Evil and Unfeeling Arse-Flenser From The City of the Damned.

Anna Mae Bollocks

#31
October 24, 2012, 08:56:51 PM Last Edit: October 24, 2012, 08:58:42 PM by TEXAS FAIRIES FOR ALL YOU SPAGS
YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO TELL PROSPECTIVE EMPLOYERS THAT YOU HAVE BEEN CONVICTED OF A FELONY IN PERPETUITY.
Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division

Q. G. Pennyworth

#32
July 01, 2013, 06:22:04 PM
Permission to plunder this thread to make a coherent list?

tyrannosaurus vex

#33
July 01, 2013, 06:59:57 PM
No plundering. Pilfering is OK though. Attribution optional, for anything of mine that ends up in there.
Evil and Unfeeling Arse-Flenser From The City of the Damned.

Doktor Howl

#34
July 01, 2013, 07:01:42 PM
Quote from: V3X on July 01, 2013, 06:59:57 PM
No plundering. Pilfering is OK though. Attribution optional, for anything of mine that ends up in there.

Wholesale sacking is okay for my stuff.  Attribution would be nice if it can be made to work, but not actually necessary in this case.
Molon Lube

Junkenstein

#35
July 01, 2013, 07:11:28 PM
You have the right to be tried secretly, in a secret court under charges that are secret. You have the right to feel lucky to know this much.


Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on October 24, 2012, 07:05:10 PM
Quote from: V3X on October 24, 2012, 07:04:18 PM
YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT.
ANYTHING YOU SAY CAN AND WILL BE USED AGAINST YOU IN A COURT OF LAW.


THIS IS NOT EVEN SATIRE.

HELLO? IS THIS THING ON?

:lulz:

I just shat my pants.  SHAT MY PANTS!

How the FUCK can you go 44 years and never notice THAT?

What's worse is the rate of convictions that come from statements immediately following "You have the right to remain silent..."

It'd be awful, but if you're not smart enough to SHUT UP at that point, you're not likely to be curing cancer or anything that weekend.
Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.

Ben Shapiro

#36
July 01, 2013, 07:56:20 PM
You have a right to go to jail for having a good time, and the right to skip the having a good time part.

Junkenstein

#37
July 01, 2013, 08:13:35 PM
You have the right to never actually be told any of these rights.
Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.

Junkenstein

#38
July 01, 2013, 08:15:24 PM
You have the right to pop-up ads for gambling while you are trying to find porn. And vice-versa.
Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.

LMNO

#39
July 01, 2013, 08:16:57 PM
You have the right to be responsible for the rules we have not told you about.

Junkenstein

#40
July 01, 2013, 08:19:21 PM
You have the right to work without pay on a trial basis for an indefinite period of time. While we assess you.
Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.

Doktor Howl

#41
July 01, 2013, 08:20:05 PM
You have the right to bleed in the back of a squadcar.

You have the right to get shot in the back of a squadcar.  <--- Portland Only.

You have the right to be turned into pet food.

You have the right to get maced for taking part in the political process.

You have the right to extraordinary rendition for quoting the constitution.

You have the right to pretend "your side" is different.

Molon Lube

Junkenstein

#42
July 01, 2013, 08:21:18 PM
You have the right to be punished to the fullest extent for ignorance of any of these rights and associated sub-clauses, documents, tarot readings and the newspaper headlines from last Wednesday.
Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.

Junkenstein

#43
July 01, 2013, 08:22:15 PM
You have the right to demand more arms to lower gun crime.
Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.

Ben Shapiro

#44
July 01, 2013, 08:28:36 PM
You have the right to send your parents to jail for falling asleep in class.
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